Insight needed!!

SO I have been going back and forth on what to do, If i should even do any thing at all. I was dating, talking and getting to know a Taurus guy for about a year. Then we slept together and literally poof be gone...now there was a situation that occured a day before he poofed but other than that nothing. His words " ill always be there for you, i want you in my future, im not dating anyone else" blah blah blah...its a really hard pill to swallow that he just wanted sex, mainly because this went on so long, but I did chalk it up to that.

I didnt send him a bunch of messages, or call him a bunch of times, I just let the chips fall, and he still has yet to contact me. I know the bulls are slow, all the time I thought he was just being his natural bull self and taking his time to get to know me, but now i think he was just biding his time to get in my pants. as i type i already know the answer but would you contact this person at all? I havent because I didnt think I should but all of a sudden hes been popping back into my mind, and i want the truth from him. Most of me has moved on but part of me is like what really happened.

Lol...

Posted by ands
hey ariesK!

idk even if i just want sex which i almost never just want rationally if u givin i stayin no?

i suppose you can give him a call and set it straight. just hope he is mature to not be like whatchu talkin bout?

Lol u know me well ands....that's what's up



But anywho I'm a lil confused about what u said in the first part of your response. Rationally and staying? Idk what u mean.

No don't continue feeding him more and more attention. Why talk to you if you're going to talk even when he's ignoring you. In other words don't REWARD him with your energy for misbehaving or he'll learn that he can misbehave and still have you and that's the wrong message to send.

Bitter pill to swallow but use this experience as a guiding post for the future. Also you stated that something happened the day before he *poofed* on you. What exactly happened? This may be the key as to why he's no longer responding.

For the most part. Don't sweat it, if the sex was great well chalk it up to having a good time and get on with your life. Don't sit around too long or you'll bring your confidence down so get up and get back out there and date again.

Posted by ands
i meant if i got into your pants once. y just once? most sex is good to a taurus so it wouldn't make sense to not keep getting in your pants!

i'm not inclined to collect trophies so if it worked out i would have kept on keeping on whatever label the relationship was. it's actually my M.O. to keep it as ambiguous as possible but i'd be around.

makes sense?

something must be indeed up. go ask.

Hmm ok, now I understand.

Are guys still doing this— FFS.

Ring him and ask him WTF his deal is or give me the number and I will do it for you.

If no decent explanation such as.....no there really isn't a decent explanation.
Even if his unit was suddenly deployed to Iraq they still have phones and internet connection.

Was the sex any good? I'm assuming it was or you wouldn't be concerned with his disappearance into witness protection.

Posted by tiki33
No don't continue feeding him more and more attention. Why talk to you if you're going to talk even when he's ignoring you. In other words don't REWARD him with your energy for misbehaving or he'll learn that he can misbehave and still have you and that's the wrong message to send.

Bitter pill to swallow but use this experience as a guiding post for the future. Also you stated that something happened the day before he *poofed* on you. What exactly happened? This may be the key as to why he's no longer responding.

For the most part. Don't sweat it, if the sex was great well chalk it up to having a good time and get on with your life. Don't sit around too long or you'll bring your confidence down so get up and get back out there and date again.

Tiki is there a male version of you telling guys that it is totally cool to spend a year doing spadework to get into someone's pants, pull out then vanish?

I think everyone needs consequences, not just chicks. If we keep rewarding this behavior he is going to be a repeat offender.


**You just inspired me to take some action Tiki. I do love you🙂

Posted by tiki33
No don't continue feeding him more and more attention. Why talk to you if you're going to talk even when he's ignoring you. In other words don't REWARD him with your energy for misbehaving or he'll learn that he can misbehave and still have you and that's the wrong message to send.

Bitter pill to swallow but use this experience as a guiding post for the future. Also you stated that something happened the day before he *poofed* on you. What exactly happened? This may be the key as to why he's no longer responding.

For the most part. Don't sweat it, if the sex was great well chalk it up to having a good time and get on with your life. Don't sit around too long or you'll bring your confidence down so get up and get back out there and date again.

I haven't given him any attention at all. I didn't call or text and neither did he, for three months. We slept together on a Wednesday, things continued the same till about Monday and then he picked a fight and then he tried to call me like nothing happened. I personally felt it was the beginning of the end and it was because he started acting diff after that day. He went from contacting me a couple of times a day to every other and then it just stopped. All very childish shit.

I won't be contacting him...thanks for talking me out of that.

Posted by tiziani
Your instincts are correct.

But it is never wise to torture yourself and leave anything unsaid. If you want to talk to him and communicate to close that chapter, why not do so? Your life is in your own hands.

Pride at this point. I'm like fuck it he ain't gonna call so neither am I. He knew where to find me before. I also believe that a man should contact first and especially after such incident.

Posted by ReallyNiceAriesPerson
Are guys still doing this— FFS.

Ring him and ask him WTF his deal is or give me the number and I will do it for you.

If no decent explanation such as.....no there really isn't a decent explanation.
Even if his unit was suddenly deployed to Iraq they still have phones and internet connection.

Was the sex any good? I'm assuming it was or you wouldn't be concerned with his disappearance into witness protection.

Another reason I haven't contacted him is because I also feel like he'll feed me a bunch of lies and bullshit. I mean he was already cowardly enough to pull this stunt. What's he really gonna say? Im
Not into you? I think that part is pretty clear bit why go to such lengths to get laid? ONCE? It's lame and I've lost respect for him. The sex was good I've had better but I was more concerned with the fake emotional connection i thought we had.

Posted by bkbella86

Posted by ReallyNiceAriesPerson
Are guys still doing this— FFS.

Ring him and ask him WTF his deal is or give me the number and I will do it for you.

If no decent explanation such as.....no there really isn't a decent explanation.
Even if his unit was suddenly deployed to Iraq they still have phones and internet connection.

Was the sex any good? I'm assuming it was or you wouldn't be concerned with his disappearance into witness protection.

Another reason I haven't contacted him is because I also feel like he'll feed me a bunch of lies and bullshit. I mean he was already cowardly enough to pull this stunt. What's he really gonna say? Im
Not into you? I think that part is pretty clear bit why go to such lengths to get laid? ONCE? It's lame and I've lost respect for him. The sex was good I've had better but I was more concerned with the fake emotional connection i thought we had.

click to expand

I think it would be best if I called him.

Your post was the last one that was able to be created. All the new ones created since are 404 errors. This freaking site... :/

BK, I don't blame you for wondering what if. We've all been there. It just becomes morbid curiosity and you cant help but think it's okay to attempt to contact at least once.

However, from what you've said, you're totally right in saying eff it. Some guys are just jack asses. Guys will do all sorts of stupid shit for ass. The extent at which they go will always amaze you. In this scenario, it's like omg really, a year??

But I guess it's because some have to work harder to get laid than others. Guys generally have to work for it more than girls, so I guess it's just hard for us to fathom why they'd go to such crazy extents for some ass.

I've been in this situation similar to this. Not bothering with the douche, no matter how curious you are, is your best bet, tbh. Eventually, you stop caring. Besides, these gene pool rejects are gonna have karma bite them in the ass hard anyway.

Thanks for the love ReallyNiceAriesPerson, sending it right back at yah.

Listen, men know when they are ignoring us, they don't forget us and when they don't want to deal with a woman they'll LEAVE and hope you get the message by moving on. If he's not calling you/reaching out to you it's because for whatever reason he doesn't want to. You don't need closure, you just have to put your feelings of rejection aside and not take his not calling personal. He hasn't forgotten you, he's just not calling because he doesn't want to call, it's not personal.

It was a shitty thing to do but a lot of men do it because they hate conflict. They'd rather leave, not respond to avoid conflict and if you chase him for a reaction, a response or whatever you're looking for he'll either continue to ignore you which will only serve to make you feel even more rejected or he'll answer/reply and tell you straight up he's not into you or he doesn't have time for you which will only hurt your feelings and make you feel rejected which was something he was attempting to avoid by dropping off the planet.

But if you go on with your life and do nothing, YOU'LL CREATE ENOUGH SPACE for him to swing back your way. Once he realize you truly have no real expectations from him he'll stop being scared and come back to you and this is what you SHOULD WANT, you want him to come to you without you having to force or convince.

If you need to contact him one last time then do it but if he doesn't react/respond/reach back then LEAVE IT ALONE...You do not want the guy to feel he's being stalked or chased which will only INCREASE his bad feelings which will only lead to the nail being slammed into the coffin which means there is no opportunity to have a better outcome because all options are lost.

Sometimes it's best to walk away, leave the door cracked when he reaches out again but if he feels icky feelings about you not letting him go he won't come back so let him go, he'll be back.

Why spend a YEAR getting to know your prospective victim first?

And yes I realise he is a Taurus.

But can't he just pull at the local bar on Friday nights?
People are weird man.

Posted by tiki33
Thanks for the love ReallyNiceAriesPerson, sending it right back at yah.

Listen, men know when they are ignoring us, they don't forget us and when they don't want to deal with a woman they'll LEAVE and hope you get the message by moving on. If he's not calling you/reaching out to you it's because for whatever reason he doesn't want to. You don't need closure, you just have to put your feelings of rejection aside and not take his not calling personal. He hasn't forgotten you, he's just not calling because he doesn't want to call, it's not personal.

It was a shitty thing to do but a lot of men do it because they hate conflict. They'd rather leave, not respond to avoid conflict and if you chase him for a reaction, a response or whatever you're looking for he'll either continue to ignore you which will only serve to make you feel even more rejected or he'll answer/reply and tell you straight up he's not into you or he doesn't have time for you which will only hurt your feelings and make you feel rejected which was something he was attempting to avoid by dropping off the planet.

But if you go on with your life and do nothing, YOU'LL CREATE ENOUGH SPACE for him to swing back your way. Once he realize you truly have no real expectations from him he'll stop being scared and come back to you and this is what you SHOULD WANT, you want him to come to you without you having to force or convince.

If you need to contact him one last time then do it but if he doesn't react/respond/reach back then LEAVE IT ALONE...You do not want the guy to feel he's being stalked or chased which will only INCREASE his bad feelings which will only lead to the nail being slammed into the coffin which means there is no opportunity to have a better outcome because all options are lost.

Sometimes it's best to walk away, leave the door cracked when he reaches out again but if he feels icky feelings about you not letting him go he won't come back so let him go, he'll be back.

Yes tiki, I know you are right. I just think it sucks that this dude wasn't up front with bella when he met her.

"Hi I'm a douchebag. I spend 12 months getting to know a girl, screw her, then disaapear."
Then she knows his game and can make an informed decision on how to proceed from there.
I don't think I am being unreasonable here. Just after the facts. Seems pretty simple.

By allowing this treatment to continue I believe we are sending the wrong message out to society.
"Shit on whoever you like. There will be no consequences. The other person doesn't deserve any consideration.
Your feelings are the only ones that matter. Screw everyone else."

Something should be done.
If no one else has the cojones to step up to the plate maybe we Aries need to sound the charge.

Posted by tiziani
I think it's sometimes important to not worry about what you may look like in front of anyone else's eyes.

A relationship is between two people at the end of the day. Society more than likely doesn't even care.

Tiki's advice is, as ever, solid but is predicated upon the idea of playing the long game and getting the man to come back and give you attention. The question is

why would you want attention from someone like that,

who will indeed have their own demons and consequences to face in their own time?

Sometimes you just have to be direct, say whatever you have to get off your chest and cut off the head of the snake before it can grow back again in your life. And if you have nothing to say to the person, that's cool. Either way do what you have to do to move on.

If bkbella knew from the get-go that he was "someone like that" I would not have a problem with the situation.
She didn't drag him home drunk and shag him the first night she met him. She wasn't loose or easy or a ho or whatever.
You spend a year getting to know someone and suddenly they vanish. That is whack.

All the guy has to do is get on the phone and say "Look you are a crap root and I don't want to see you anymore."

If we are telling the girl to 'get over it' why aren't we telling the guy to 'man up' 'grow a pair?'

I'm too old for all this stuff to affect me now, but it really REALLY shits me that people are so fricken rude and disrepectful to each other. Why can't we be nice? Be civil? Do unto others yada yada yada.
Maybe I should just mind my own business.
Rant over. As you were.

Posted by ReallyNiceAriesPerson

Posted by tiki33
Thanks for the love ReallyNiceAriesPerson, sending it right back at yah.
Listen, men know when they are ignoring us, they don't forget us and when they don't want to deal with a woman they'll LEAVE and hope you get the message by moving on. If he's not calling you/reaching out to you it's because for whatever reason he doesn't want to. You don't need closure, you just have to put your feelings of rejection aside and not take his not calling personal. He hasn't forgotten you, he's just not calling because he doesn't want to call, it's not personal.

But if you go on with your life and do nothing, YOU'LL CREATE ENOUGH SPACE for him to swing back your way. Once he realize you truly have no real expectations from him he'll stop being scared and come back to you and this is what you SHOULD WANT, you want him to come to you without you having to force or convince.
If you need to contact him one last time then do it but if he doesn't react/respond/reach back then LEAVE IT ALONE...You do not want the guy to feel he's being stalked or chased which will only INCREASE his bad feelings which will only lead to the nail being slammed into the coffin which means there is no opportunity to have a better outcome because all options are lost.
Sometimes it's best to walk away, leave the door cracked when he reaches out again but if he feels icky feelings about you not letting him go he won't come back so let him go, he'll be back.

Yes tiki, I know you are right. I just think it sucks that this dude wasn't up front with bella when he met her.

"Hi I'm a douchebag. I spend 12 months getting to know a girl, screw her, then disaapear."
Then she knows his game and can make an informed decision on how to proceed from there.
I don't think I am being unreasonable here. Just after the facts. Seems pretty simple.

click to expand

men don't do that if they want to get you-know-what.

Posted by tiki33
Thanks for the love ReallyNiceAriesPerson, sending it right back at yah.

Listen, men know when they are ignoring us, they don't forget us and when they don't want to deal with a woman they'll LEAVE and hope you get the message by moving on. If he's not calling you/reaching out to you it's because for whatever reason he doesn't want to. You don't need closure, you just have to put your feelings of rejection aside and not take his not calling personal. He hasn't forgotten you, he's just not calling because he doesn't want to call, it's not personal.

It was a shitty thing to do but a lot of men do it because they hate conflict. They'd rather leave, not respond to avoid conflict and if you chase him for a reaction, a response or whatever you're looking for he'll either continue to ignore you which will only serve to make you feel even more rejected or he'll answer/reply and tell you straight up he's not into you or he doesn't have time for you which will only hurt your feelings and make you feel rejected which was something he was attempting to avoid by dropping off the planet.

But if you go on with your life and do nothing, YOU'LL CREATE ENOUGH SPACE for him to swing back your way. Once he realize you truly have no real expectations from him he'll stop being scared and come back to you and this is what you SHOULD WANT, you want him to come to you without you having to force or convince.

If you need to contact him one last time then do it but if he doesn't react/respond/reach back then LEAVE IT ALONE...You do not want the guy to feel he's being stalked or chased which will only INCREASE his bad feelings which will only lead to the nail being slammed into the coffin which means there is no opportunity to have a better outcome because all options are lost.

Sometimes it's best to walk away, leave the door cracked when he reaches out again but if he feels icky feelings about you not letting him go he won't come back so let him go, he'll be back.

i hear ya tiki...however I really dont want him to come back...I just really want some clarity on the situation and maybe closure....but why would he feel stalked or have ill feelings for me? i havent done a thing to warrant that, not saying he still cant feel that way but thats his issue...its been too long at this point for him to "come back" and to do what pick up where we left off? I think not!

Posted by ReallyNiceAriesPerson

Posted by tiziani
I think it's sometimes important to not worry about what you may look like in front of anyone else's eyes.

A relationship is between two people at the end of the day. Society more than likely doesn't even care.

Tiki's advice is, as ever, solid but is predicated upon the idea of playing the long game and getting the man to come back and give you attention. The question is

why would you want attention from someone like that,

who will indeed have their own demons and consequences to face in their own time?

Sometimes you just have to be direct, say whatever you have to get off your chest and cut off the head of the snake before it can grow back again in your life. And if you have nothing to say to the person, that's cool. Either way do what you have to do to move on.

If bkbella knew from the get-go that he was "someone like that" I would not have a problem with the situation.
She didn't drag him home drunk and shag him the first night she met him. She wasn't loose or easy or a ho or whatever.
You spend a year getting to know someone and suddenly they vanish. That is whack.

All the guy has to do is get on the phone and say "Look you are a crap root and I don't want to see you anymore."

If we are telling the girl to 'get over it' why aren't we telling the guy to 'man up' 'grow a pair?'

I'm too old for all this stuff to affect me now, but it really REALLY shits me that people are so fricken rude and disrepectful to each other. Why can't we be nice? Be civil? Do unto others yada yada yada.
Maybe I should just mind my own business.
Rant over. As you were.

click to expand

Thats how I think as well RNAP...like is it really that hard to have common decency? to not waste peoples fucking time? thats what pisses me off the most

Posted by sugaries
I think the ignoring game just proves that your feelings are invested (which is not a bad thing but you can fake it like they're not) I would just call him up and act like I'm catching up. "Haven't heard from you in a while" see what he says, if he apologizes or acts like he was too busy. This is someone you talked to for a year...I think you deserve an explanation.

i do deserve an explanation but I will not call him and act like shit didnt happen...catching up? we texted and talked everyday...that would be pure bs and I dont operate that way.

Posted by rockyroadicecream
Your post was the last one that was able to be created. All the new ones created since are 404 errors. This freaking site... :/

BK, I don't blame you for wondering what if. We've all been there. It just becomes morbid curiosity and you cant help but think it's okay to attempt to contact at least once.

However, from what you've said, you're totally right in saying eff it. Some guys are just jack asses. Guys will do all sorts of stupid shit for ass. The extent at which they go will always amaze you. In this scenario, it's like omg really, a year??

But I guess it's because some have to work harder to get laid than others. Guys generally have to work for it more than girls, so I guess it's just hard for us to fathom why they'd go to such crazy extents for some ass.

I've been in this situation similar to this. Not bothering with the douche, no matter how curious you are, is your best bet, tbh. Eventually, you stop caring. Besides, these gene pool rejects are gonna have karma bite them in the ass hard anyway.

I love when I get to the not giving a shit stage...thats right around the time they start sniffing around my ass again wondering where all the fucks i once gave have gone....your rocky its about curiousity more than anything...did you lie the whole time, did you have a girl? did i suck in bed i mean all sorts of things run through your head when your literally left hanging.

When a man disappears that is the closure. He deserves a good tongue lashing but you don't need to find him to do that. He'll be back and if the door is closed well there isn't anything to talk about and he'll learn that you're one of the women that isn't desperate enough to take him back. It's our actions that speak louder than our words. Men (a lot of men) are action orientated thus they don't really talk/communicate with too many words.

As for deserving an explanation, he doesn't owe you anything, he is free to leave whenever he likes and thus he left. Your priority is to not allow him back in to do it again.

"i hear ya tiki...however I really dont want him to come back...I just really want some clarity on the situation and maybe closure....but why would he feel stalked or have ill feelings for me? "

If you don't want him back then why "want" clarity? Can you accept it's over? If it's over then there really is nothing to be clear about. He changed his mind, the dog died, granny had a stroke blah blah, no real explanation will ever be sufficient in these kind of situations. If you've done nothing wrong then of course the reasonable thing to do is to move on, his problem not yours.

As long as you don't reach out to him he won't feel icky or stalked so if anything let him go, he isn't your husband so yeah he can go whenever he chooses the door.

ReallyNiceAries men are men, they haven't changed in centuries when it comes to love and communication. Why can't we stop kicking a dead horse and grow up and stop expecting miracles from men? The men don't have to grow up because we women (a big majority) have not stopped being desperate, we are too busy trying to replicate la la land & filling in the blanks & make exceptions for shitty shotty behavior.

Men are men, when a woman recognize this, understand it then she doesn't need closure, she just close the door for good and move on which sends out a very CLEAR LOUD message to him "you can't do me this way and come back" this is how boys/men learn from their errors quickly and efficiently. It's our reactions/actions that teach men.

Posted by bkbella86

Posted by rockyroadicecream
Your post was the last one that was able to be created. All the new ones created since are 404 errors. This freaking site... :/

BK, I don't blame you for wondering what if. We've all been there. It just becomes morbid curiosity and you cant help but think it's okay to attempt to contact at least once.

However, from what you've said, you're totally right in saying eff it. Some guys are just jack asses. Guys will do all sorts of stupid shit for ass. The extent at which they go will always amaze you. In this scenario, it's like omg really, a year??

But I guess it's because some have to work harder to get laid than others. Guys generally have to work for it more than girls, so I guess it's just hard for us to fathom why they'd go to such crazy extents for some ass.

I've been in this situation similar to this. Not bothering with the douche, no matter how curious you are, is your best bet, tbh. Eventually, you stop caring. Besides, these gene pool rejects are gonna have karma bite them in the ass hard anyway.

I love when I get to the not giving a shit stage...thats right around the time they start sniffing around my ass again wondering where all the fucks i once gave have gone....your rocky its about curiousity more than anything...did you lie the whole time, did you have a girl? did i suck in bed i mean all sorts of things run through your head when your literally left hanging.

click to expand

I blame the pisces bs in our charts tbh. I hate it because to top it off I've got a fricken fixed venus. So not only do I have the uber curiosity of wanting to know the why, I've got a fixed sign that won't stfu and drop it.

...nvm you have the same venus as I do.

I FEELYOUR PAIN, haha.

Posted by sm
I was dating, talking and getting to know a Taurus guy for about a year. Then we slept together and literally poof be gone...
From a Taurus man's mouth -
"He didn't like the sex, so he went where the pastures are greener".

Lol...

Better off getting a forehead kiss, no? Haha...

Posted by LadyAries25

Posted by ReallyNiceAriesPerson
By allowing this treatment to continue I believe we are sending the wrong message out to society.
"Shit on whoever you like. There will be no consequences. The other person doesn't deserve any consideration.
Your feelings are the only ones that matter. Screw everyone else."

Something should be done.
If no one else has the cojones to step up to the plate maybe we Aries need to sound the charge.

Guy screws girl over.
Guy vanishes into thin air.
Everyone tells girl to let it go, DON'T CALL HIM, walk away.

Message to guy, from society: screw who you want, we'll tell 'em to keep quiet.

Or, girl tells guy off, guy labels her as crazy ass bitch, girl goes home crying, again.

sigh..

click to expand

Pretty much. I like to make it a hybrid.

Assuming I were to see the guy around- Aries ice and make him feel really, really uncomfortable. It's the silent treatment version of telling him off. 🙂

There certainly are men out there that are only interested in the chase. A player/Asshole, a Misogynist, a Narcissist, Bipolar/Borderline, Pick Up Artist, Sociopath and those are just a few that will definitely woo a woman for months and drop her.

His game is mostly about dominance and control. Capturing her as his hostage through the guise of attention and love. Control a woman's mind and emotions with love and attention and he's controlling her life. She'll sit around for months waiting for him to come back, if she's smart she'll never look back. His objective is not love, he does not care about love or women for that matter.

These are the darkhearts and if women don't really know about these types she's going to bump her head occasionally. These are the men that won't change, never ever.

"The one thing is, though...do you really believe that these men can never or wont ever change?"

No they (the darkhearts) won't change. In order for something to change he'd have to admit something was wrong with him/wrong with his behavior and these kind of men believe their perfect and if you see something wrong with him then it's your problem---you're the problem not him. Why? They've created a perfect image that most women fall for so why change? No reason to.

The only time real change comes about is when he loses everything, a crisis occurs, deep considerable loss has to occur but for the most part a large majority of these men never change.

Misguided men change all the time but it's not because we women make them change, they change because they want to change, they do it for themselves and not for us.

Exceptions for not changing is when he's mentally disordered for example Bipolar, Borderline Personality Disorder, Sociopathic, Psychopathic, Narcissistic, Anti-Social, Aspergers etc...These men won't change, normal healthy people will have to adjust or abandon.

"I want to know if they're happy, content, etc.... Tiki?"

They are secretly miserable and/or depressed but being outwardly miserable won't secure a new source of supply (supply equals female) so he pretends to be happy and content to lure in new women and/or a new target. Happy people that are content with themselves don't hurt people, do there best not to hurt others.

The darkhearts want to feel POWERFUL through dominating a woman and the quickest easiest way to do that is to saturate her with attention and love, him seeing her fall in love with him makes him feel powerful, important, omnipotent, secure, confident--those feelings is what he's after, not her.

These men exist and every woman out there dating have to be aware that there are men out there that pretend to be interested by saturating her her with feeling of love, adoration and attention and once he see she's caught he's gone because his goal was to DOMINATE her, to feel important through her, to feel omnipotence through dominating her and move on to the next target to do it all over again, they exist among the good guys so we women have to teach ourselves to recognize these kind of men.

Posted by rockyroadicecream

Posted by bkbella86

Posted by rockyroadicecream
Your post was the last one that was able to be created. All the new ones created since are 404 errors. This freaking site... :/

BK, I don't blame you for wondering what if. We've all been there. It just becomes morbid curiosity and you cant help but think it's okay to attempt to contact at least once.

However, from what you've said, you're totally right in saying eff it. Some guys are just jack asses. Guys will do all sorts of stupid shit for ass. The extent at which they go will always amaze you. In this scenario, it's like omg really, a year??

But I guess it's because some have to work harder to get laid than others. Guys generally have to work for it more than girls, so I guess it's just hard for us to fathom why they'd go to such crazy extents for some ass.

I've been in this situation similar to this. Not bothering with the douche, no matter how curious you are, is your best bet, tbh. Eventually, you stop caring. Besides, these gene pool rejects are gonna have karma bite them in the ass hard anyway.

I love when I get to the not giving a shit stage...thats right around the time they start sniffing around my ass again wondering where all the fucks i once gave have gone....your rocky its about curiousity more than anything...did you lie the whole time, did you have a girl? did i suck in bed i mean all sorts of things run through your head when your literally left hanging.

I blame the pisces bs in our charts tbh. I hate it because to top it off I've got a fricken fixed venus. So not only do I have the uber curiosity of wanting to know the why, I've got a fixed sign that won't stfu and drop it.

...nvm you have the same venus as I do.

I FEELYOUR PAIN, haha.

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half my chart is underwater and so are my transits right now...im pretty sure thats why ive been thinking bout him....hopefully it will pass soon...i think we do have the same venus..smh

Posted by tiki33
When a man disappears that is the closure. He deserves a good tongue lashing but you don't need to find him to do that. He'll be back and if the door is closed well there isn't anything to talk about and he'll learn that you're one of the women that isn't desperate enough to take him back. It's our actions that speak louder than our words. Men (a lot of men) are action orientated thus they don't really talk/communicate with too many words.

As for deserving an explanation, he doesn't owe you anything, he is free to leave whenever he likes and thus he left. Your priority is to not allow him back in to do it again.

"i hear ya tiki...however I really dont want him to come back...I just really want some clarity on the situation and maybe closure....but why would he feel stalked or have ill feelings for me? "

If you don't want him back then why "want" clarity? Can you accept it's over? If it's over then there really is nothing to be clear about. He changed his mind, the dog died, granny had a stroke blah blah, no real explanation will ever be sufficient in these kind of situations. If you've done nothing wrong then of course the reasonable thing to do is to move on, his problem not yours.

As long as you don't reach out to him he won't feel icky or stalked so if anything let him go, he isn't your husband so yeah he can go whenever he chooses the door.

ReallyNiceAries men are men, they haven't changed in centuries when it comes to love and communication. Why can't we stop kicking a dead horse and grow up and stop expecting miracles from men? The men don't have to grow up because we women (a big majority) have not stopped being desperate, we are too busy trying to replicate la la land & filling in the blanks & make exceptions for shitty shotty behavior.

Men are men, when a woman recognize this, understand it then she doesn't need closure, she just close the door for good and move on which sends out a very CLEAR LOUD message to him "you can't do me this way and come back" this is how boys/men learn from their errors quickly and efficiently. It's our reactions/actions that teach men.

thanx for the advice

Posted by RealTalk
Better off getting a forehead kiss, no? Haha...

stalking me now? ooooo i feel special.

Posted by bkbella86

Posted by RealTalk
Better off getting a forehead kiss, no? Haha...

stalking me now? ooooo i feel special.

click to expand

You're not worth stalking boo,(hence this desperado thread of yours, lol)your thread was on the MAIN page in case you forgot, so that's how I came across your little uh...dilemma. Your sex was trash boo. Get over it...HE DID.

I'm glad you feel special though because the Taurus ain't!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! Oh I came across this just for you hun! You should feel even "special(er)"

Toot it & boot it! Who gets to know someone for a year, & then dumps them? That's pretty fucked up. See, I'm glad I was able to provide you with some videos for insight...listen to J. cole, straight up now tell me do you really wanna love me forever, oh oh oh, or is it just a hit & ruuuuuuuun, well...apparently lol. You're welcome 🙂.

*trots off*

Posted by RealTalk
Toot it & boot it! Who gets to know someone for a year, & then dumps them? That's pretty fucked up. See, I'm glad I was able to provide you with some videos for insight...listen to J. cole, straight up now tell me do you really wanna love me forever, oh oh oh, or is it just a hit & ruuuuuuuun, well...apparently lol. You're welcome 🙂.

*trots off*

you are stalking me....did you forget you blocked me? and then took the time to unblock me....pressed much? yup...carry on!

o and i cant see any of your videos womp womp