please im begging for help with my aries guy.

im a capricorn girl, i met an aries guy and he was the best thing that ever happened to me, he fell in love with me from the first sight and he was caring and loving in a way that i was wondering how can such guys exist these days cuz he was one of the best and i really couldnt imagine myself happier cuz he was adorable. he even told all his family about me and i was going to visit them in his country to make our relation official and get engaged. after 6 months together he left me suddenly,suddenly he told me i dont feel anything and im not in love anymore, and that he is not ready for any commitment right now cuz he has some course to finish and he is not focusing on anything but his career future. though we agreed on a distant relationship and he told me you are mine forever and no one will take u from me and i will always be with u even if i was away and he said it many times. when he was breaking up with me he assured me he doesnt love someone else at all but he cant be with anyone now. well before the break up he was in travel to his country, and plus he had few tension in his country because there was troubles and crisis there and he went through a lot until his country came back to normal condition. since those problems in his country began he became a different person (his mother even told me my son has changed and no one knows whats going on in his head, and he became COLD hearted and careless and only cares about politics). he asked me in the main time to be only friends and i told him i will never be ur friend and insulted him and walked away, the next day he asked his sister about me cuz she is my best friend and to check on me if i was okay. i just want to know what happened and why did he leave me like this? he loved me in a way no one can imagine how much, suddenly he stopped and it killed me. And deep inside i know he still in love cuz one time I went out and saw him by coincidence and he was very happy to see me,and we acted like friends and said hi for eachother, while i was sitting with my friends he was staring at me all the time, I could read his eyes and feel that he still love me from the way he was looking at me, a girl can feel. i just want to know Why did he leave me? and what will happen now? i cant get him out of my mind. Please help me what shall I do.

Sorry to hear this happened to you. After my recent breakup with my ex, I almost want to make "how to deal with a breakup" required school course. I never want to feel sad again when someone says goodbye this is over but your heart still wants to be with that person. The brain wants to figure out why and how and when! and what can I do, while the heart has no brain it just feels and feels it, and admire those who can mend their heart quicker than mine.

Not that I haven't had a situation where the breakup was good for both of us and I just picked myself up like it was just an ordinary beautiful day. But then there is the time you still care for someone.

Why did he break up with you? I think he changed or was changing when you met him. When we are in love we want the world to stay as perfect as it is when your heart says I love you. And then something happens, that wasn't predicted when you decided to be together, a situation that might encourage one person to change focus to a family member in trouble, a political situation bigger than them, bigger than you and them, a job situation. He is still the same person if things were to go back to the way things were, but life keeps moving along and if we could stop time to keep that which we cherish now, we would, I believe he would too.

He left you. He made a decision to breakup even though he knew it would break your heart and would mean giving up one thing to pursue something else. You might disagree with why he felt he had to do that was bigger than the relationship. You might be feeling extra hurt because everything was going so good and so fast, and then one day everything changed. He probably thought everything happening in his life was changing him or pressuring him and he had to start focusing on those pressures. I bet he feels the world chose for him in a way, and he had to do what the world wanted of him and that if he didn't he would regret it, even if it meant regretting the decision to breakup.

"and what will happen now?"

you have to be the same person you always were meant to be, if anything you have to be more of you. You have to care about what makes you happy besides the thought of him, just like you were still together / or never met. You have to love yourself and know that this will work out for you, even if you don't want to.

...

Because you in the future, will have a chance to look back and say "oh everything worked out, and I survived and found where I want to be in my life", and you can only get to that future self where you are satisfied with the situation by keeping the good, and healing the bad that you feel. You have to have faith that the good part of what you shared will be there in your heart even after you decide to love yourself again, and do the things you like to do, and stop thinking about this bad time.

You don't stop loving your friends when they move to a different school, you might see that friend or loved one again, if you choose to live your best life you will find the way to have what you want in life, that might be him, that might be someone else who is exactly what you want. And you have to have faith in yourself that you can have what you want, and that you are strong enough to listen to your beautiful loving self that you are gonna understand everything when the time is right.

Be happy and proud of yourself that you shared a wonderful time because you were open to that, and ready for it, and that you are so awesome and somebody he still cares about.

You are expressing yourself, and getting things out in the open, that is an amazing thing. That shows that you are able to get to the awesome you in the future that didn't let this stop you from being happy.

And yes this is a hard situation. Life gives you only what you are capable to deal with.

"I can't get him out of my head."

Right now you can't. Right now you can if you wanted to. You don't want to get him out of your head right now because you are still trying to figure this out. Like a puzzle. Once you start doing what you should be doing you will one day glance back at this puzzle and have the answer. The answer will come to you when you stop stressing over it, and when you love yourself, and love this world and are happy that life keeps moving. I don't fault you for thinking "how unfair this is". Forgive yourself too. You aren't meant to feel bad or feel hurt, that is why you are trying to figure this out, and trying to judge the situation, to protect your heart. You will find the courage to let your heart heal and move on, and you will stop protecting your heart and let the world love you again, instead of shying away from it.

You asked him, he tried to help you understand, his family tried to comfort you, be proud of these things, because you are worth it!

And if you want to keep telling yourself untrue things today or for a week, that "this situation means that love doesn't exist" or "you won't be happy again", fine do that. I can't stop you. But eventually you are gonna not want to feel this way and you are gonna notice that you are listening to a voice telling you these things that you actually disagree with, and you are gonna start disagreeing with these kinda statements and say, "no, love does exist, I can be happy, this will work out".

That is all I ask, is that one day soon you will start disagreeing with these ideas and start to feel what you truly feel again, that you are worth loving yourself and life is worth loving openheartedly again and that you are amazing.

I recently found that if I imagine a nagging friend or parent telling me these things like, "oh you won't be happy again", "see I was right you were wrong" etc etc, that if I imagine someone else saying these things, I find it easier to come up with a way to argue back and believe what I truly believe to be true.

🙂)) thanks a lot for your advice, u donno how much i really appreciate it, what really hurt me is that i was extremely happy in a way that and i cant hide from u (it scared me) cuz i have never been that happy before and cuz we were more than perfect together just like fairy tales stories. and what i was scared of, actually happened, he left me as if nothing existed between us. i need strength and love myself more like u told me, i just hope i'll get over it, i know i will, thanks a lot Heroic_guy 🙂

oh dear. i feel for you, i really do. i'm not sure that i can contribute anything that heroic guy hasn't already stated, but sometimes it just helps to know others are thinking about you.

the bad news is you're heartbroken, hurting, confused, anxious.

the good news is that it sounds as if his reason for breaking up has virtually nothing to do with you. if he feels he needs to concentrate on other things, then it really is best that he let you go. think about the alternative....you would probably stand by him and remain loyal through anything that would come, and he probably knew this. what might happen as he concentrates on other things, puts everything else first and leaves you to simmer on the backburner? you might start to feel neglected which might make you fight more, etc and your relationship could suffer. when you are thinking about the hows and whys and what ifs, also think about how he might have spared you from even more heartache down the line.

xoj

p.s. heroic guy, happy belated birthday and i'm sorry to hear about your scorpio.