My chaotic venus placement

Hey guys, this has been tugging at my brain for a while so I thought I'd ask y'all for some advice.

Ever since I was a child I've felt CURSED in the love department. I don't rule out the possibility of a witch having casted a spell over my fetus self at some point at all.



I've always been very confident in general, regarding my interests, friends, social gatherings etc (I'm a Gemini moon though so I battle anxiety sometimes, but overall quite confident). The only department I've never been confident in is love. I was literally born with the feeling of not being enough, like I border wasn't even worthy of love. I have no idea where this comes from, I just know that feeling has always been there.



As a child I would crush on boys in school but I would never EVER tell them because I knew they wouldn't like me back and I was so utterly terrified of rejection, so instead I just dated them in my head. I spent so much time dreaming up scenarios with these people rather than ever making it happen.

As I got older I started moving into real relationships, but only with really, really destructive people. I would sacrifice so much of myself in order to please my two previous long term boyfriends, to the point where it mentally screwed me up.

I've been casually dating aswell, but everytime I find someone I like and it looks like it's going somewhere great - I find out they've got a girlfriend at home, or some bs like that. I've lost count of how many times I've almost ended up being "the other woman."

My luck in love is absolute dog shit, I can't catch a break.



This is the venus placements/aspects I was born with:

Venus in scorpio in 12th house

Venus in retrograde

Venus square mars

Venus conjunct jupiter

Venus sexstile neptune

Venus opposition Lilith

Venus conjunct Asc node

Venus conjunct Ascendant

And then my general placements are:

Scorpio ascendant/venus/pluto/sun, Gemini moon, leo mars, libra mercury etc.

I read this today "According to old Astrology lore, someone with this placement is doomed to overwhelming pain and sorrow in the love department and often has at least one experience of unrequited love to endure."

Is this literally gonna be the pattern for the rest of my life? Does anyone else have similar placements?

True & mean node in scorpio 12th house, Saturn in pisces 3rd house.

I'm really starting to see a pattern with these damn 12th house/pisces influences lol

Venus retrograde can be really hard and your's is in the 12th house too. I think you gotta work a lot on self-love and accepting all of your own flaws and perceived "unlovable" parts. Then you will start attracting people into your life who are better for you. A major life goal of Venus retrograde natives is to work on loving themselves and with learning to take care of yourself. I can see how Venus in Scorpio would bring in destructive relationships - release that part of your inner belief that only chaotic and dramatic relationships that cause a lot of emotional turmoil are "true love" or the only thing you deserve

It's the venus in the 12th house that brings many partners and most of them will always be wanting to cheat on their significant other, even at your calling of them to do so at any time. It brings a lot people to you that want you for one thing. You just have to weed those out of your life and learn to say no with a furry if you don't desire them.