Cancer Men Help

I've been seeing this cancer casually for 3 months now, and I feel like things aren't really progressing between us. I'm not sure if I should move on or be patient and see where things lead.

I've been having trouble deciding because he's hard to read at times. Whenever I call or text, he always returns my calls and we talk really well. However, I still only see him once a week. I asked him if we could see each other a little more and he was ok with it, yet it hasn't happened, but he still chats to me regularly and he brings up the fact that we'll 'definitely see each other soon'.

Recently he opened up to me and told me his dad was very ill. It was very sad. So I'm not sure if I should hang in and be there from a distance or let him be to deal with his personal issues...

Hi, well, first, do you feel like being patient and waiting for him to open up? Because this is what it takes as Crabs dont trust or open too soon. If have feelings for him, then wait, they are not initiators, so proposals will have to come out of you for the time being until he opens up.
Dont push it too much, as he is dealing with something very serious and important. Crabs are very family oriented and I guess his Dad being so ill is devastating to him (well to anybody really), but Crabs are very sensitive and tend to hide in their shells when feelings overflow...
Just decide if you love him, if you do, wait...
Dont discard him just because he is moving slower than you..
(Ive been there too....and decided to be patient..and it was worth it)

I agree about patience. A LOT of patience.

They aren't huge on initiating, it'll make you wonder just what he's thinking - but he'll be trying to work you out too, for his inner safety and security.

How about this? "I understand your dad is ill and that you have a lot on your plate right now. I'd love to get to know you, I think you're a lovely guy, so I'd like for you to know we can do that on your time".

Understanding, patience, his terms (for security within himself) and reassuring him you're interested will go a long way.

I guess you have to put yourself in his shoes for a while and think about whether you could progress healthily in a relationship if your mind was on a sick family member.

Cancerians are very emotional, very slow to move forward - but worth the wait of you can keep busy in the meantime. they're lovely sweet people with huge hearts - but their actions can confuse you if you take them personally - it's about him, not you, he works on emotions. While his dad is sick he'll be going through a lot.

Hey!
Thanks so much for the great insight! It really helped! I think I just needed a little boost of confidence that he's still interested. I really don't mind being the one to initiate things at all. He was just hard to read as I'm used to the opposite of his actions. He found out about his dad 3 months ago during the time we had started seeing each other. He wasn't allowed to say anything to anyone until his sister returned. So I was very flattered and took it as a sign that he is slowly opening up to me.

Last night we talked for a bit and then asked me this: "what are you doing tomorrow?"
me: "I have no plans yet, you?"
him: "I'm going into work and then coming home and probably just read"

I didn't say anything further. I don't know if its a hint he wanted me to invite him over or still hasn't decided whether he was ready to see me...but thanks again for you insight!

"I'm going into work and then coming home and probably just read"

he is waiting for your proposal!!!!
God you know how many times my Crab has done this!!!
They fear rejection..
Maybe you can say something like.. Oh well, I have no plans myself, and if you want, we can hang out for a bit. Or something like that.

After almost 6 months with mine, he is still VERY INDIRECT. It is HARD sometimes but if they imply they will be at home or will get home early or whatever, they are saying I WANT TO SEE YOU. They cant bring themselves to say the words.

PPPFFFHAHAHAHAHAAA!!!

Where have you been all my life!

I wasn't sure about it due to his dad's illness...anyway, thanks! I sent him a message saying: I'm not sure if you wanted to be alone tonight but if you have time you should come over and get some cupcakes ! And tea for your parents!

I had bought them tea after finding out the news.

Cancers baffle me...

Anyway I mentioned to him that there were afew shows I wanted to see in the following month and he was interested in coming along with me. We never made anything official between us so I wasn't too sure if its extremely casual or something a little more between us. time will tell...

"Who forces time is pushed back by time; who yields to time finds time on his side." ~The Talmud

Time is the wisest counsellor of all...

Marmir, you definitely need to do some initiating. Try it out, you will probably be happily surprised with the results. Good luck!

yeah, like they said intiate! if he's asking if you're free on a certain day just say, "nothing, want to hang out?" or something along those lines.

Thanks guys!
Unfortunately he returned my text and said : "Thanks for the offer! But don't plan your night around me. I might just be taking it easy"

i asked if everything was ok and he said it's all good he's just organizing himself...

Well looks like he went into a his hole. I don't think I'll contact him again. He seems to need his space.

How would I know he's really blowing me off? Whenever I initiate the calls he always replies within good time...but I'm starting to feel I'm chasing him...

I think as long as he answers you back in a timely fashion you are good.
Now I think it is a good idea to leave him to his space and let him contact you again.

It is Ok if he needs space and time, he has too much in his head right now. Plus he doesnt know you too well to open up and share his feelings so as he is not feeling good, he prefers to be on his own. that is perfectly understandable, I would react in the same way if I was in his shoes.
what is your zodiac sign—

Yep, I totally understand! I'm Aries...I know I know, we are not the most patient..but for what its worth I think I'm doing ok with all of it.

I was in a relationship with a Cancer for 5 yrs before, and I guess because this guy is new, we're still figuring out our grounds. With my last ex, it took us a year and half to make things official and he would always go back and for, but eventually he settled in and we were pretty cool.

Cancer's have huge hearts and very sentimental! but everything is so subtle you have to look for clues and keep your eyes and ears peeled to know what they're getting at! haha