Cancer trouble

All I want to know is : Do all cancerians "jump to conclusions" without asking or knowing the situation ? do you never ask a direct question?

Sorry, wanted to say :
Do you guys ever ask a direct question?

Hi again,
I guess I should have explained myself. When I posted that I was just venting
my frustration.I have this ex boy firend who is cancerian. I haven't seen him in years.
But recently he got in touch with me and said he wanted us to be friends. Since I really liked the guy, I said "yes". He lives in another country so we have been keeping in touch for like a month via telephone or emails. At first everything was fine.I really enjoyed talking to this guy and I think overall he is a pretty remarkable person. Its just recently he keeps bringing up old stuff and tries to put all the blame on me...mind me...he does this in an indirect way. But being a pisces ( a curse!!) I am good at picking up subtle hints... I do feel guilty about my part in the whole situation. I have already apologised to him for all that stuff like a hundred times in the past.Whereas he hasn't apologised a single time for his part...
I decided to forgive him none the less, thinking it must be very difficult for him to say sorry.I know some people are like that. Now he is doing this...I don't know what to think anymore.

Sorry guys for ranting like this.

When i'm acting like that, unfairly, i need to be put in my place. I suggest you tell him that you can't do anything about the past, that you apologized and he should get over it. He might turn away and eventually realize you're right and become nicer. You can't let us be annoying like that. It's easy to do that, to pisces, especially.
Good luck.
BTW, i never apologize, i live with what i did and try to be better.

Thanks for your thoughts Mr. Crabby.
It seems you are absolutely spot on about everything.
I told him just that yesterday...he went all quiet..and didnt say much after that.
And today I get this 2 line cryptic messeage that says he feels misunderstood. Guess what? still no SORRY!! Well I didn't expect that anyway.

"You can't let us be annoying like that. It's easy to do that, to pisces, especially"

I guess you are right...I so wish I was a "scorpio" or "Capricorn" right now!!

Just thought I would let you know Mr. Crabby, He's back. Exactly as you predicted.
He must have more than one planet in cancer in his natal chart.I have to admit he has become nicer..and says he thinks he has been acting like a jerk. So do you think I should give him another chance...I guess what I am really asking is : Is it really over or will he at a future date start doing it all over again? I guess his attachment to the past kinda frightens me.Although I don't wanna lose a friend, I don't want to go through the same thing over and over again.

I'll really appreciate your input on this one.And you should know I think you are one very WISE crab.Take care. 🙂

It seems to me that your attitude with him will influence the relationship a lot. When he says that he's been a jerk, i suggest that you agree and tell him not to be one anymore, that you prefer when all is going well. (make sure to use the fishy smile when doing that). The goal is to get closer to him so he doesn't feel like you're hiding stuff from him or getting detached.
At the same time, you might want to keep your distance when he's jerky and mean or whatever, he might understand that he'll only get some time with you if he's nice and respectful. Don't take crap, he'll respect you for it, be assertive, demand to be treated well. We need to be pushed in the right direction.
If you're positive when around him, he should pick it up and be positive. It's not like we enjoy being difficult. (well, not always anyway)
I know he might be weird again and will be hard to deal with, but that's also part of growing up, we're late bloomers, we need a lot of time. Things might not work out in the long run, but you might have grown a little bit each on your side. Learning from everything, i say.

Damn, i kinda miss my fishy, now.

Well, not just one, eh.

Hey Mr.Crabby,

Thanks for your help.I'll try to keep all of the above in mind when I am dealing with the cancer in question.Now that I know a bit more about his "bag of tricks",I think i will be able to handle him better than before.LOL

"Well, not just one, eh."

I hope you are right...not sure about that though! (kidding)

I am sorry you don't have your pisces with you now...I am sure she misses you a lot too.

Take care.

Just thought that i could point out something here.

"I am sorry you don't have your pisces with you now...I am sure she misses you a lot too."

See, you don't know that, you mean well, but you don't know, it's empty words. Maybe she does miss me, maybe she wishes me dead, maybe she doesn't remember me, who knows?

Hey Mr. Crabby,

Its good to hear from you.

You are right about that...I don't know and neither do you.

Okay, Let's analyze the situation rationally..
To make things simple..say there are only 2 options :she either misses you or she doesn't.I got rid of "she wishes you dead" b/c you give me the impression of being such a nice person (I maybe wrong!) and "doesn't remember" b/c we pisces never forget.
So now that things are a bit simpler...the law of probability says there is a 50 percent chance of my being correct and she misses you...at least sometimes...like you do sometimes. So you see my words weren't empty after all.😉

Take care.

Well, i'm not always nice. I've been here a week and called all sorts of stuff already. 😄
I've always found that pisces had terrible memory, maybe not for emotional stuff, i don't know.
Anyway, this thread isn't about me. 😉
What's your name about anyway?

I?ll let you in on a little secret?I?m not always nice either. LOL
Yeah, I?ve a terrible memory when it comes to practical stuff like addresses or phone numbers but not when it comes to people or emotions or totally useless information.

?Melusine? is a character from European mythology?kind of like a water spirit?she?s usually described as a snake or a mermaid. I personally find her story very intriguing,
I guess that explains my nick.

Just b/c I started this thread doesn?t mean we have to only talk about me. We can talk about anything you like. 🙂

Funny, the fishy i knew reminded me of a mermaid and i called her that. I'll have to read about that spirit.
Enchantresses!!

"Funny, the fishy i knew reminded me of a mermaid and i called her that. I'll have to read about that spirit. Enchantresses!!"

So you had yourself one of those fishes,eh? interesting!
I hear they are very rare and hard to catch...I was right then...you are a very wise crab.

So tell me what's the story behind your nick?

I didn't know her for very long, actually. I just wish i had gotten to know her better. We were both in a difficult period at the time, so it wasn't easy.
I am a mister, and i am crabby. Moody, difficult, hard to get along with. It's a very simple nick, i didn't have to think too much about it.

Mr. Crabby...I totally agree with you about not letting us be jerks. If you tell us we might pout for a minute, but we always get over it and me personally...I have NO problem admitting when I am wrong. I have no problem apologizing especially when I didn't know I was acting a certain way or being extra moody.

Melusine...I say he probably wants to get back with you. People we loved deeply like that, we are unable to be friends with fully because in the back of our minds we probably would like to give it another try. What were the major issues in your relationship that broke it up? I mean if you don't want to discuss them here, write them down and think about it. If they are things you can compromise, I say you guys may slowly be able to build something...if not, let him and that sinking ship go because it will hurt worse the second time because the expectations are there for change.

Just my 2 cents! CL/CM2

Hi Mr.Crabby,

Isn?t it funny how things work out in the end? Before I started going out with the cancer I mentioned, I thought we completely understood each other b/c we started out as friends. Boy, was I in for a shock! Now we are back to square one as friends. I think it?s better this way.

I know it?s presumptuous of me to say this but I?ll do it anyways, since I like you so much. 🙂 From what you have said about her so far, she sounds like a wonderful person.
You should keep in touch with her. You know it?s never too late to go after a good thing.

I think your nick is funny though, kinda reminds me of Mr. Krabs from the Spongebob
Square pants cartoons. Cool .LOL

Hey Cancer Lady,
Thanks for your input on the situation with the cancer. But I don?t think he wants to get back with me b/c he has a girl friend now?actually he seems to be quite prolific in that department. The girls seem to come and go. Is that normal for a cancer you think?
As I mentioned in my previous posts, we don?t live in the same country. I think he just missed the easy camaraderie we used to have?.I kinda missed that too all the time we were apart. We have known each other for a long time. ..We used to live in the same neighborhood when we were kids. For me the major issues were possessiveness, immaturity, frequent emotional drama ? and I?m sure if you asked him, he?ll probably list those same things about me. LOL

Take care.

I'm starting to learn that sometimes, it's good to stay just friends, even if you have feelings. I hope i can keep that in mind in the future.
About the mermaid, she clearly shut the door and didn't really call back the last time, it was obvious she was trying to keep her distance, and i respect that. And now it's been a while so i doubt there's anything there even for friendship. I can't forget and just pretend things didn't happen, and it seems she's like that too. And she had people around her, so it's not like she needed me or anything. It's easy to scare the little fishies sometimes.
LIVE and LEARN.
Boo-yah!

You did NOT just say Boo-Yah...OMG that is soooo 1990! Good for nostalgia's sake though!

Boo-yah pwns yo ass, dawg!

I bet this would be more modern, right? Besides, i was only 9 in 1990, so it's not like i "lived" that period.

LOL Yeah, I guess...

Hmm, I'm surprised.Such wisdom from someone so young.
I thought you were at least 45.(kidding)

I'm sorry to hear about you situation with the mermaid. I was in a similar situation a few weeks ago with my cancer friend. I thought it was better not to keep in touch b/c I thought he wanted to keep his distance.So I think your reluctance in this case is understandable.

Oh, about the scared little fishy comment, all I can say is that you haven't met the
right kind of fishies yet, my friend. I pray that you do and get the biggest surprise of your life. 😉

Take care.