Girl proposing to guy?

I was having an interesting conversation with a Virgo friend of mine. She has been official with a Cancer male for 3 1/2 years, I think they have known each other for like 6 years and have been friends for 2 1/2 years. She is one of those women that knows what she wants and goes after it. She was telling me that she thought that her boyfriend would have proposed to her by now but she thinks he is afraid of being rejected by her because she is such a strong, independent woman.

Therefore, she wants to take things into her own hands and propose to him. From my observations I think they have a pretty good relationship overall. I am not really close with her but when I do see them they seem quite happy. She told me that she is going to get a ring and pop the question, because she thinks it is time and she is not going to wait for him to do it.

I told her that if she felt like it was the right thing, then I advise her to go for it because in these modern times, I don't think it matters anymore who proposes. Although I do have my own personal opinions on the pros and cons of a woman proposing, I was just wondering how other people viewed it. Of course their are some traditional people that would oppose but then there are some people that would see nothing wrong with a woman proposing.

I personally would have a lot of fear, I would take a long time to think about actually doing it and also I would over analyse the relationship and probably anything could throw me off from actually going through with it. But I think that if another woman has the balls to do it, then I think why not.

What do you guys think?

erm....normally I would say "why not?" but with a cancer guy....cancers are big on traditional gender roles in relationships...there is a very good chance it would freak him out....

If she really thinks that he wants to ask her but is afraid to then my suggestion would be for her to drop hints - big heavy loud banging hints..... [I swear those shells are sound proof.......]

Would I be a bad friend if I said that I think she may get rejected? I see nothing wrong with a woman proposing to a guy but if the guy is a Cancer I think he will set the pace that he is most comfortable with and will therefore know when he is ready. If she proposes and he feels like he is not ready I think she can prepare to see him resort in his shell.

I just didn't want to look at it in a negative way. But I guess nothing will stop her from doing it and time will tell what the result will be.

bad idea

I think so too... but if I were to say it to her she'd think I am hating. Regardless, I think she's going to do it any way... I know her... we'll see.

And that she shall... on the other hand... we could be wrong and he may say yes. Maybe he is one of those guys that allows the woman to wear the pants.

Therefore, she wants to take things into her own hands and propose to him. From my observations I think they have a pretty good relationship overall. I am not really close with her but when I do see them they seem quite happy. She told me that she is going to get a ring and pop the question, because she thinks it is time and she is not going to wait for him to do it.

Hmm, tough question and this is a tough situation. I think plans for marriage have to be equal interest on both ends. I find nothing wrong if she proposes 🙂 But, I hope that they have talked about serious, long-term comment in the past.

LOL... like I said the girl's got balls. 🙂

CappyS... I guess maybe that's why she is confident enough to want to propose because she knows him better than anyone would and they probably had that talk about committment and like you said, equal interest in marriage. She is a smart girl, and I am sure she won't do anything to make a fool of herself. She did mention that he said he feared being rejected if he were to propose. So maybe she is just doing him a favour.

I take my hat off to her because alot of girls haven't reached the stage in their relationship to be confident enough to propose to their guy.

I asked her what she thought his repsonse would be and she said "He will say yes... this is what we both want."

🙂

Very true UnusualC/Starfish:

There are so many ways to look at it... and because every relationship not being the same, a different response can be expected for each. I think modern days have changed the way that guys look at marriage. Many years ago, women wouldn't sleep with; much less live with a man that was not her husband. However, we women have evolved and become more independent and therefore make our own decisions as to how we prefer to date, unfortunately it costs us sometimes because men become complacent and after already getting everything they want and need from a woman in a relationship they find no need for marriage. That's why the women are left trying to persuade them.

Times have changed but I would prefer the traditional way, because I wouldn't want to propose to a guy and he says yes then when the actual wedding happens, he leaves me hanging at the alter.