Got2bGood
@Got2bGood
20 Years
Comments: 0 · Posts: 18 · Topics: 5
Help! Need some relationship advise...
This is what I know about Cancer men. (But, I am not an expert...and I don't know that I want you to take advice from me that may lead you wrong!...)
The Cancer man I knew and cared about could have great sex with any woman and not get involved....if he thought it meant only sex to her. He had many affairs with married women and girlfriends of other guys before he met me, as well as single women. He was magnetic! He almost left me before it got serious...I hadn't told him how I felt...thinking he didn't want to hear it...but, things were good...I didn't understand why he was leaving...it was just his way I guess...but, I told him how I felt and he stayed! To this day, I think he would get back with me if I would give the Yea signal.. but, we outgrew each other or something...
What I am saying: If you have strong feelings and you think you might lose him...tell him about your feelings. It might matter to him! If you still lose him...at least the air was cleared!
Once attached, it is hard to detach them. She seems to play on this. He thinks he has no one else that wants to be attached to him.
How did I do, Cwab?? Any insight??
The Cancer man I knew and cared about could have great sex with any woman and not get involved....if he thought it meant only sex to her. He had many affairs with married women and girlfriends of other guys before he met me, as well as single women. He was magnetic! He almost left me before it got serious...I hadn't told him how I felt...thinking he didn't want to hear it...but, things were good...I didn't understand why he was leaving...it was just his way I guess...but, I told him how I felt and he stayed! To this day, I think he would get back with me if I would give the Yea signal.. but, we outgrew each other or something...
What I am saying: If you have strong feelings and you think you might lose him...tell him about your feelings. It might matter to him! If you still lose him...at least the air was cleared!
Once attached, it is hard to detach them. She seems to play on this. He thinks he has no one else that wants to be attached to him.
How did I do, Cwab?? Any insight??
This Weeks Article:
"What constitutes a healthy relationship?"
by Susie and Otto Collins
Recently, one of our newsletter subscribers asked
for our take on what constitutes a healthy relationship
and we decided we would answer her question and
include it here in this week's newsletter.
In our opinion, a healthy relationship is based on
two ideals: First--both people in the relationship are
partners; Second-- in Stephen Covey's words from the
"7 Habits of Highly Effective People" everything that
happens between the two people is a "win/win" or
no deal.
With that being said, here are some elements that we
consider to be necessary in a healthy relationship:
In a healthy relationship, the intentions for the relationship
are set in advance and agreements are made from these
intentions.
No matter what kind of relationship you are involved in,
it is possible to determine, set and create in advance
intentions for the relationship. Whether with a parent,
child, supervisor, co-worker, or significant other--you
can work with the other person to create what you both
want in the relationship. As the relationship grows,
changes and evolves, intentions and the agreements
made from these intentions are constantly renegotiated.
In a healthy relationship, both people are able to be authentic
in who they truly are and are able to speak their truth.
In a healthy relationship of any kind, both people are
able to be themselves and to speak freely about their
ideas and what they are feeling without blame, judgment,
or criticism. They are simply honored for who they are.
In a healthy relationship, both people take responsibility
for their actions, their thoughts, and their words.
As we've said in past articles, they each take 100%
responsibility--no more and no less-- for what's going
on in the relationship.
In a healthy relationship, both people are emotionally
aware and are both able and willing to look inside themselves
for what's really at the bottom of an issue or feeling and
what's most important to them.
Emotional awareness allows a person to know what
he or she is feeling in every moment. It is your measurement
stick that tells you whether your needs are being met, your
life is in balance and whether you are happy or not.
I received this in my mailbox and thought that I might share it...seems to make sense to me. Got2bgood, I know what you are going through is tough. I agree with Star...express YOUR feelings. If this relationship is meant to be than it will be. Have no regrets. Just be who you are and know that no matter what happens, it is for the best. All situations are meant to be as they are given to us for our growth. My best wishes to you and to your Cancer man.
Freebird
Star I can't say I have read the posts properly as they r too long
But I did read your last few sentences and I would say you hit the nail on the head with what you said because I totally understand what you mean.
However, I think that everyone gets attached to other people. Just different types of people and sometimes in more subtle ways. Us cancers are not THAT needy, perhaps we just wear our heart on our sleeves a lot more often than perhaps most "normal" (!) people do and that gives off the impression that we are like that.
But I did read your last few sentences and I would say you hit the nail on the head with what you said because I totally understand what you mean.
However, I think that everyone gets attached to other people. Just different types of people and sometimes in more subtle ways. Us cancers are not THAT needy, perhaps we just wear our heart on our sleeves a lot more often than perhaps most "normal" (!) people do and that gives off the impression that we are like that.
Wow...thanks for the responses. The article about the relationships is so true. And, Star, this is my second CANCER man. The first was just as you described...A DOG! Had many women all over the USA...married, single and even found out he liked more than one at a time. I was floored, never would I have thought of him like that.
This one is different...he has my heart! I am so scared. I know I need to tell him how I feel. But, I don't know what to say...Every time I think I will say something to him, at least a hint...I get all nervous and can't say ANYTHING. I thought about sending an email...but I want to see his face and his reaction. The clock is ticking and time is running out....I have to tell him that there is someone else that loves him, cares for him, would treat him better and NEVER leave him. Then if he goes...it was meant to be! But...he needs to be treated better and should not go back just because of the kids.
I'll let you all know what happens....I am supposed to see him this weekend unless he goes to back to her before that.
This one is different...he has my heart! I am so scared. I know I need to tell him how I feel. But, I don't know what to say...Every time I think I will say something to him, at least a hint...I get all nervous and can't say ANYTHING. I thought about sending an email...but I want to see his face and his reaction. The clock is ticking and time is running out....I have to tell him that there is someone else that loves him, cares for him, would treat him better and NEVER leave him. Then if he goes...it was meant to be! But...he needs to be treated better and should not go back just because of the kids.
I'll let you all know what happens....I am supposed to see him this weekend unless he goes to back to her before that.
Hope things go well for you Got2bGood!
Cwab! I will try to make my posts shorter! LOL! You know I am fascinated with Cancers!!
Cwab! I will try to make my posts shorter! LOL! You know I am fascinated with Cancers!!
Star,
You seem to be able to get Cwab talking. Keep it up, I find him fascinating too!
You seem to be able to get Cwab talking. Keep it up, I find him fascinating too!
Amy,
I would tell him how you feel! Not telling him isnt going to change how you feel and if you do reveal this, it could make a difference.
"I have to tell him that there is someone else that loves him, cares for him, would treat him better and NEVER leave him."
You sound adorable, and I dont think he could possibly turn down someone that cute! I understand exactly how you feel about being so nervous!!!
I wish you all the best!
and much happiness,
SuzyQ
I would tell him how you feel! Not telling him isnt going to change how you feel and if you do reveal this, it could make a difference.
"I have to tell him that there is someone else that loves him, cares for him, would treat him better and NEVER leave him."
You sound adorable, and I dont think he could possibly turn down someone that cute! I understand exactly how you feel about being so nervous!!!
I wish you all the best!
and much happiness,
SuzyQ
I was not able to see him this weekend...so this is what I wrote him. I have never been so scared in my life.
WHAT IF...
When your in deep thoughts, thinking about your life...Do you ever wonder about those...What If?s...
What If...
There was someone else that cared for you...could be your best friend...wanted you to be happy and feel secure.
What If...
It had even crossed her mind about a possible future down the road...willing to take things slow...to wait it out and see what happens.
What If...
She knew she could love you unconditionally...and if ever committed to you...would never...never leave you.
What If...
What she wanted most in life...were the things that money can?t buy...had waited all this time...for just a chance to do things the right way and had felt this way for a long time.
What If...
You were to walk out of her life and never come back...and she never told you...and the What If?s...might have mattered to you.
A Response Is Not Required
WHAT IF...
When your in deep thoughts, thinking about your life...Do you ever wonder about those...What If?s...
What If...
There was someone else that cared for you...could be your best friend...wanted you to be happy and feel secure.
What If...
It had even crossed her mind about a possible future down the road...willing to take things slow...to wait it out and see what happens.
What If...
She knew she could love you unconditionally...and if ever committed to you...would never...never leave you.
What If...
What she wanted most in life...were the things that money can?t buy...had waited all this time...for just a chance to do things the right way and had felt this way for a long time.
What If...
You were to walk out of her life and never come back...and she never told you...and the What If?s...might have mattered to you.
A Response Is Not Required
Oh, but I have say this!
You're climbing mountains;
I'm on a hill.
You're always running,
and I'm standing still.
You live for the moment;
no future; no past.
I maybe a fool to love by the rules;
I want it to last!
If you ever have forever in mind,
I'll be right here, and easy to find.
If your heart
isnt read to lay down with mine,
If you ever have forever in mind?
Music has ended;
still you want to dance.
I know the feeling;
I cant take the chance.
You live for the moment;
No future; no past;
I may be a fool to love by the rules;
I want it to last!!
If you ever have forever in mind,
I'll be here and easy to find.
If your heart isnt ready to lay down with mine,
if you ever have forever in mind?
You're climbing mountains;
I'm on a hill.
You're always running,
and I'm standing still.
You live for the moment;
no future; no past.
I maybe a fool to love by the rules;
I want it to last!
If you ever have forever in mind,
I'll be right here, and easy to find.
If your heart
isnt read to lay down with mine,
If you ever have forever in mind?
Music has ended;
still you want to dance.
I know the feeling;
I cant take the chance.
You live for the moment;
No future; no past;
I may be a fool to love by the rules;
I want it to last!!
If you ever have forever in mind,
I'll be here and easy to find.
If your heart isnt ready to lay down with mine,
if you ever have forever in mind?
I love Vince Gill, and I had that song in my mind after reading your post.
'If You Ever Have Forever in Mind'
True Love is understated
True love is being known
Oh I've never felt so connected
two hearts have found a home
and no matter how we struggle
oh, I'll answer when you call
we'll walk away from trouble
and live to tell it all
Its aint about you
its aint about me
its about this love we found
that has to be
Cause I never questioned
that look in your eyes
You never doubted
how I felt inside
This gift you've given
humbles me
True companions
we'll always be
For so long we've waited
to feel what we feel
We finally taste for
something that is real
two hearts beat as one
Oh and we both know a place
where our souls can race
I think its what they all
call life
Two hearts found a home
Got2bGood you Got me going!
What would makes you fall in love with someone?
What are you looking for in a mate—
Please tell!
What are you looking for in a mate—
Please tell!
Got2beGood-
It's got to be very hard for him. Some people are wholly devoted to their children and the way you make it sound, his children mean a lot to him. I am assuming by your post that so far his wife has custody of the children and she is using them in part of her revenge thing she has going on with him. Some people stay in unhappy marriages just for hte children. If I were you, I would distance myself a little bit more, though still emotionally supporting him in his trouble, until he actually goes through the divorce. It also sounds like he needs time to think about the future- give him some space to do that but tell him that your there for him when he needs you.
It's got to be very hard for him. Some people are wholly devoted to their children and the way you make it sound, his children mean a lot to him. I am assuming by your post that so far his wife has custody of the children and she is using them in part of her revenge thing she has going on with him. Some people stay in unhappy marriages just for hte children. If I were you, I would distance myself a little bit more, though still emotionally supporting him in his trouble, until he actually goes through the divorce. It also sounds like he needs time to think about the future- give him some space to do that but tell him that your there for him when he needs you.
Takin Sometime
Come on in and meet my heart
you can stay; make yourself comfortable
If I seem a little nervous,
I've been walking on shaky ground.
I ve been alone for a very long time,
and Im not quite sure what I'm doing;
all this time was for just one man,
and then its all gone in just a day.
Makes it kind of hard to find a brand new way,
but please understand
I am trying to be strong, and
Im am giving it my very best;
hopefully time will take care of the rest.
I've been very busy packing up the past,
and I just met someone new,
and I've never been so happy.
I feel nervous, so I'm taking
some time
this is for us;
there wont be anymore crying and misery.
all that time
for just one man.
here is my plans, because
dont want to do go through that again.
was all gone in just a day
nice to meet you;
why dont you stay.
I really could use a friend/
Come on in and meet my heart
you can stay; make yourself comfortable
If I seem a little nervous,
I've been walking on shaky ground.
I ve been alone for a very long time,
and Im not quite sure what I'm doing;
all this time was for just one man,
and then its all gone in just a day.
Makes it kind of hard to find a brand new way,
but please understand
I am trying to be strong, and
Im am giving it my very best;
hopefully time will take care of the rest.
I've been very busy packing up the past,
and I just met someone new,
and I've never been so happy.
I feel nervous, so I'm taking
some time
this is for us;
there wont be anymore crying and misery.
all that time
for just one man.
here is my plans, because
dont want to do go through that again.
was all gone in just a day
nice to meet you;
why dont you stay.
I really could use a friend/
Got to Be Good,
I agree with Miss Post, but this is something you will have to decide for yourself. "Let your heart be your guide." I would be there for him. There are more than his life involved and that takes sometime to work out what is going to be best for everyone. I would stay close and be there for him. Sometimes we need someone who is not so personally involved to give their honest perspecitve.
Good Luck
to you both!
Suzy
I agree with Miss Post, but this is something you will have to decide for yourself. "Let your heart be your guide." I would be there for him. There are more than his life involved and that takes sometime to work out what is going to be best for everyone. I would stay close and be there for him. Sometimes we need someone who is not so personally involved to give their honest perspecitve.
Good Luck
to you both!
Suzy
i guess nobody likes my stuff!
Oh My God...Suzy-Q...I love it all. You are a true romantic like me. Your soul is deep like mine. Once I really love you...my love is forever. I love vince Gill too!
Those were all my words...not a poem...they came straight from my heart. I meant every word! I know if he has read it...He is TRIPPING! That was some deep stuff...don't you think?
And, yes I know people do thngs for their children and that's why I am so scared of him going back. But, this woman has done this to him 3 times, not even taked to him in a year. Now she's out of money and wants him back. Sorry, but I will make my feelings known now. She has competition, there is another that loves him now.
I plan on backing off...but not avoiding him...I know after all this I said sinks into his mind...he will say something about it....or he will go now...and never come back. He knows now....that if he goes back to her....he will always remember what I said and know how I feel for him.
We get along too well...we have been close...and he has made some hints about the future with me. It would be very hard for him to never see me or talk to me...I know that....I FEEL IT! We live in the same town...he would have to see me at the schools, stores, every where! He knows how good we are and could be together.
Now....he needs to think! And hopefully he will go with his true heart...
Those were all my words...not a poem...they came straight from my heart. I meant every word! I know if he has read it...He is TRIPPING! That was some deep stuff...don't you think?
And, yes I know people do thngs for their children and that's why I am so scared of him going back. But, this woman has done this to him 3 times, not even taked to him in a year. Now she's out of money and wants him back. Sorry, but I will make my feelings known now. She has competition, there is another that loves him now.
I plan on backing off...but not avoiding him...I know after all this I said sinks into his mind...he will say something about it....or he will go now...and never come back. He knows now....that if he goes back to her....he will always remember what I said and know how I feel for him.
We get along too well...we have been close...and he has made some hints about the future with me. It would be very hard for him to never see me or talk to me...I know that....I FEEL IT! We live in the same town...he would have to see me at the schools, stores, every where! He knows how good we are and could be together.
Now....he needs to think! And hopefully he will go with his true heart...
"Those were all my words...not a poem...they came straight from my heart. I meant every word! I know if he has read it...He is TRIPPING! That was some deep stuff...don't you think?"
Yes I did like what you wrote to him. Very serious and to the point. I keep going back and re-reading it. You are very romantic, me too. I was thinking how he must be feeling very loved, and he is in the middle of some very deep and personal thoughts. It did for me. He is lucky to have you, and for you to be so patient and understanding. I want you guys to get together!!! I hope it all works out for you both and you love like never before and are very happy! Hang on to each other.
Suzy
Yes I did like what you wrote to him. Very serious and to the point. I keep going back and re-reading it. You are very romantic, me too. I was thinking how he must be feeling very loved, and he is in the middle of some very deep and personal thoughts. It did for me. He is lucky to have you, and for you to be so patient and understanding. I want you guys to get together!!! I hope it all works out for you both and you love like never before and are very happy! Hang on to each other.
Suzy
Okay, he opened my mail...I got the confimation. He called me, sweet as ever...but said nothing about it nor did I. Now what does that mean?
Dont know? He may be kind of shy about it! But he called you so he obviously cares!
Dont worry the
What If's matter.
If there is such a thing as 'LOVE' and it exists then it will work out.
Try not to put any conditions on love and try and be unselfish, patient, and understanding. Everybody expects love to satisfy and instantly gratity their needs. Whether is sex, companionship, financial, emotional etc... It isnt about that. IMO, true love is caring, sharing and putting the other person above your self. It is being unselfish and it is making sacrifices and sticking together through everyting no matter what. LOYALTY! Just love them because you do!
True love is rare and is hard to come by and even harder to hold on to in the world today.
I still believe! and my heart is wide open even after much pain. Actually even more so after all. Because it is worth it!
SuzyQ
What If's matter.
If there is such a thing as 'LOVE' and it exists then it will work out.
Try not to put any conditions on love and try and be unselfish, patient, and understanding. Everybody expects love to satisfy and instantly gratity their needs. Whether is sex, companionship, financial, emotional etc... It isnt about that. IMO, true love is caring, sharing and putting the other person above your self. It is being unselfish and it is making sacrifices and sticking together through everyting no matter what. LOYALTY! Just love them because you do!
True love is rare and is hard to come by and even harder to hold on to in the world today.
I still believe! and my heart is wide open even after much pain. Actually even more so after all. Because it is worth it!
SuzyQ
darn and sorry on the spelling problems.
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You may take or leave this information; care about it or not. But, because I would want someone to tell me if I didn't know, here you go.
If you have had a conversation with anyone with the following handles:
Suzy-Q
Aqua-2
If you have had a conversation with anyone with the following handles:
Aqua-2
I won't be on the message board any longer...
but, I will miss you most of all, Cwab! Your sense of humour is delightful!
Take care, be happy and be well!
Star
but, I will miss you most of all, Cwab! Your sense of humour is delightful!
Take care, be happy and be well!
Star
Do we make good combinations? My girlfriend is a cancer, I LOVE her sooooo much, we were awesome friends for close to 4 years before we started going out, I honestly feel that I could be with her a very long time, but sometimes she's all mixed up about st
I know...I know...so, I embellished a little...
I was hilarious in my mind!!
OK...so, that's Mr. Cwab to me!
I was hilarious in my mind!!
OK...so, that's Mr. Cwab to me!
is it just me, or is there any other cancers that's life is not getting better. i am ready to give up. Sometimes i wonder what have i done so bad that i am being sooooo punished. will i ever find happiness and love. this has been the worst few years fo
only the lure of good money can get me to leave home, but two months is a long time to be away from all my security blankets. whats a homebody to do? and im gonna miss reading every ones posts. gotta get a laptop. sorry , im just feeling anxiety over lea
So what is up the past week or so with you Cancer's? Mine is gone...I call it the shell. Is this happening to all of you? It just trips me out. For months you can't get enough of us,you ring our phones 10 times a day...then you disappear for a while like
Question...I find that most of my friends who happen to be water signs can be unfaithful to their partner (even when married)....And it doesn't seem to bother them...any thoughts?
Lust or love how do you know the difference?
If friends for a while and then the chemistry changes is it love? If the trust issue etc has been dealt with and you are great friends can lust really come about or is it more?
Not talking abo
If friends for a while and then the chemistry changes is it love? If the trust issue etc has been dealt with and you are great friends can lust really come about or is it more?
Not talking abo
could someone please give me some insight on the cancer males personality and how to win the heart of a cancer male?
Why does it seem that cancer women have a hard time forgetting the bad things we do,but it seems like they never remember the good things we do for them.And my cancer female always backs away from confrontation,whats up with that?
scorpio guy
scorpio guy
...make it so great! i was reading the previous thread and was inspired to start another.
What are some of the simple things in life that give you the most pleasure—
Joy rides
favorite song on radio
sunny day w blu
What are some of the simple things in life that give you the most pleasure—
Joy rides
favorite song on radio
sunny day w blu
Dear All,
what would make a cancer man stop loving you and just leave you like you've never shared any feelings? what would make him cheat and lie to you, and dump you and keep coming back to you after all? I am a broken heart Libra - just a 3
what would make a cancer man stop loving you and just leave you like you've never shared any feelings? what would make him cheat and lie to you, and dump you and keep coming back to you after all? I am a broken heart Libra - just a 3
I am an Aquarius/Pisces cusp who would like to get to know a Cancer Female for Conversation and maybe more. Supposedly we are made for eachother and just want to engage in friendly conversation. I know this is not a dating site and Apologize if I am off
OK.
Here we go.
Is life worth living?
Why?
Does anything matter?
Prove it?
Shall I kill myself?
Or is it not worth it?
Shall I be good/bad? Does it matter?
Thanks
Here we go.
Is life worth living?
Why?
Does anything matter?
Prove it?
Shall I kill myself?
Or is it not worth it?
Shall I be good/bad? Does it matter?
Thanks
is giving oral pleasure something you forget after many years? I didn't forget.
can a men know if a woman had sex yesterday, or a year of 15 years ago? i have to admit - i give myself pleasure but not always. it has been a couple of months sin
can a men know if a woman had sex yesterday, or a year of 15 years ago? i have to admit - i give myself pleasure but not always. it has been a couple of months sin
We're all going to die today or get bad news
First of all, I love reading these...I have learned alot about traits of a CANCER MALE! For some reason, I seem to be in a relationship with another one! The last CANCER man, broke my heart. Found out he got married and was still talking to me. This new o
Are any of you Cancers having any luck with love—? This year has been awful for me. I love someone, he doesn't love me or he loves me but I don't love him. It's been going on like this for over a year!
A Pisces man shattered my heart in De
A Pisces man shattered my heart in De
How do you know when a cancer woman is in love with you.
Are there any cancer women out there who can give me clues.
Cheers.
C
Are there any cancer women out there who can give me clues.
Cheers.
C
I have been involved with a Cancer man for 11 months. I am falling in love with him...he is everything I've ever wanted in a man. Problem...He was married for 18 years, 3 wonderful children. His divorce should be in a week. This woman has left him 3 or 4 times...she wipes out the bank accounts, max's out the credit cards and leaves him to fix it all. Tried to cause him to lose his job...has been a real devil about his relationship with his children. I have been there with him all this time, seen how hurt he was, he opened up to me. She has wanted nothing to do with him...until now. One week before the divorce. Up until about 4 months ago, this worried me, some things he had said, lead me to think he might go back just for his kids...but then, he started talking about us, little remarks that made me think we might have a long lasting relationship in the future. We get along so well and the sex is out of this world. Listen, I would marry this man today if he would ask me. I am so scared, It would devastate me. You know how Cancer's are...they only open up to you if they want to...They hate confrontation and will avoid it if they don't want to talk. I asked him...point blank...Are you gonna go back? I could tell he didn't want to talk about it too much, kept changing the subject. He says, She wants to get back together, told me she was sorry...he told me...she is out of money now, how do I know she might not do this again to me down the road...I want someone to stay with me...not leave and come back...I don't think I want to do this again. I heard hesitation in his answer. Oh, if he goes back, I know her...I will have to see them together...she has no idea he has been in bed, my home, been around my boys. What to do? Should I bale out now, wait to see what happens....or keep seeing him, and take a chance? Please tell me what you would do? He does not know I LOVE HIM...I have not told him yet, been waiting on his divorce.
I am soooo upset and I can't talk to him about it....I know he is thinking and can tell he does'nt want me to ask him about it now...What to do?
Amy