I admit defeat and failure to keep my Cancer

I don't know if he'll ever come back. It's been almost 4 months now of silence between us because he's been ignoring me.

I admit defeat and failure in this non existent relationship.

I am not asking for advice. I am just admitting defeat and my failure in keeping this man interested.

Since I'm not one for regrets I won't look back and beat myself up.

Just wishing other ladies and gents much luck with their Cancers. I have much love for him still but I don't think I can go on pining for someone who just checked out after declaring their love and adoration for me the last time we had contact. This is dangerous for me since I have tendencies to fall into love addiction, which is so unhealthy. So I won't drag it on much further even though I probably could for years. But I won't.

I always tell him that I'll be there when he checks back in. And I have for almost a year now I've held on to hope and whenever he did check back in I was just there for him. This time I feel hopeless that he would ever come back. That just makes me sad and since I don't like being sad, I'm going to live my life instead, like I always have. He was so lovely when he actually communicated with me. But the silence and non responsiveness really kills me.

Thanks to all you cancers on this board. You guys keep crackin me up and keeping my love for him alive for as long as I could manage. I learned so much more in the past year about Cancers and about myself in relation to them. And also in my close friendships as well. So I still have much love for you guys. HUGS ALL

He's done this to me many times. I'm all in and he'd tell me he's all in and then he disappears. I hold on as long as I can and then I let go. Then he would come back, apologize and the cycle repeats again.

It is not so much that I want to hold on to the dream of being with him. It doesn't matter if I do it intentionally or unintentionally since I can't just say alright, I'm going to fall out of love just because someone wonderful disappeared on me. It will take some time to readjust. It is also that he is such a lovely person when he is checked back in. I could use all the tools in the box to start detaching from him but that doesn't mean that the feelings are just going to go away just because he stopped communicating. I am not even angry at him. Nor do I stop smiling when I am reminded of his smile and sweet nature. He is still an awesome person whether he speaks to me or not. But I am no doormat.

Thanks for empathizing.

We usually communicate by text and I texted him yesterday. No reply. None since September.

I don't have the balls to just call him. He probably won't even pick up anyway.

I'm just gonna let it fade and let time do it's job at healing.

On a lighter note. There's a really HOT aquarius guy I've been talking to who does indeed answer and return my messages. =P

That's the funny thing. that you're saying that I let this fall apart. Placing the blame on me. No. Not happening. I kept the ball rolling for as long as I could. What works for you might not work for everyone else. I kept on messaging even for 4 months of being ignored by him. So I won't let you tell me that it's my fault or that this one is on me. I don't need blaming. I admit my defeat. It is done and over. He's not interested and if he is, he's not showing it. I kept showing my interest level by constantly messaging every few days to every few weeks, which is still fairly high, but he is the one not responding to me.

Different strokes for different folks. Your method of communication was via phone. Mine was via text messages.

I've been texting him consistently for almost a year now. I still tell him how much I miss him and how I would gladly accept him back whenever he's done dealing with whatever he's dealing with. He's told me he gets sad and moody. I understand. I let him be. I wait days. I wait weeks. I wait months. Usually he came back and things go back to normal and we're good again. This time, no go. I don't know if he is gone for good. But I sure as hell won't take the blame for this one. I kept the ball rolling. He dropped it.

Posted by duchessedenemours
Cancers who are in love are almost of our control their feelings run so strong. Cancers who are apethetic and in control might keep someone around to stay the loneliness but that's all it will amount to. Cancers are not half-hearted people.

There is little reason in being at someone's side or waiting for them. I am sure you yourself know that it will go nowhere and yet you keep wanting to hold onto the dream of being with him. Holding onto that is only going to close you off from opportunities of love with others. It's time to let go and find a new path. I'm sorry for your pain.

she pretty much nailed it. I think your wasting your time waiting around for him.

gemini. dont waste your time.
the only time cancers and geminis are good together is for sex and same sex friends.
besides that, i am fairly certain without knowing the nitties that you have told him goodbye and not held that end of the deal or said mean shit to him... there is no way a gemini handles being ignored and lets be honest here, youve said some rude things. anyway, fuck that guy. cancers play by their own dillusional rules sometimes. go for a leo guy... theyre basically a more interesting cancer thatis actually capable of love.

Well, I'm not really waiting...Gemini don't really wait....after 1 month of that ignoring shit I was pretty much done. This gemini just likes to fantasize about good times cuz that Cancer kept coming back and promising he wouldn't disappear again and again. My venus in Taurus is what was holding me back from moving on big time because I really wanted this to work, badly. But anyway, that's over now.

You are absolutely right, I probably did say some rude shit since the beginning like from the getgo and I rarely apologized for shit I said or did anyway. That boy was real sensitive and everything I said was like taken out of context. I did kind of felt like a wet nurse while walking on egg shells. But hey..I did really really like this person. I admit to that. He did get me interested for almost a year. He did keep it hot when he cared to show up.

And you were right again because I did tell him good bye last May and I didn't stick to the bye part and he came back full blast in June so it was a draggy draggy thing that just wouldn't quit.

One thing I don't agree with tho, is that I do think that Cancers are capable of tremendous love. I have very close cancer friendships with both sexes and they are full of love...how they dispense that love...well that's another matter altogether. This one tho, he just ain't got it for me anymore..that's all. I accept defeat and I failed and whatever that means I don't know. But this time though, if he ever does come back and makes promises again, I wouldn't be able to trust him as I did before. Stuck my hand out on the fire way too long and now I'm burnt to a crisp.

Moving on. There is a really nice quiet and withdrawn softie Aqua who needs my attention and I've got a Leo roommate who isn't a narcissist but just a cute pooty cat.

Sorry it didn't work.
Gemini-Cancer is a tough pairing in terms of romantic relationships.

As for that other Gem dissing Cancers- trust me chickie, I could dump a laundry list of Gemini shortcomings in a tit for tat.
But I won't, because I DO have Gem friends and know better.

Yea...I still love Cancers. I still have very awesome friendships with them. I still have feelings for him even tho he's gone. Nobody's perfect and I accept that.

I do know what he wants and why he's probably pissed off at me because I guess in a way I am holding back. He wanted to meet and be FWB and I don't know if I'm comfortable with the whole FWB thing. Guys these days just wanna slip comfortably into a FWB situation and not fully commit. So I'm holding way back cuz I need more than just casual sex and so I'm not putting out. This is a guy thing..not a sign thing.

I bet if I sent him a half naked pic like he wanted and asked for, I'd get his attention again. But I'm gonna keep it classy and not do that. I'm not one to try and keep a man by throwin my titties out there. Hah. Sigh...I'm not that desperate. Just cracks me up tho...cuz I know I could get him back but I don't think I'd want to go down that route again.

Yeah.
Just move on. If he's just pushing for FWB its going any further than that .

i refuse to believe that gemini females are all so predictable enough to be titting and tatting around freely.
that was just my cancer titties, i have a lot more tats on that predictable cancer/leo cusp