Telling a Cancer how to Live?

Do any of you cancer men get upset about this? When someone tells you what you are doing isn't exactly a good way to do it? or if you are questioned on your actions, or just plain told "WHAT" you should be doing with yourself instead?

OKay, I understand that would make ANYONE mad if they were being told this, but you know some people could just take it in stride, listen, and just say "thanks for the concern, but I know what Im doing"...especially if its coming from a loved one, close friend, etc..But do you all cancers have a hard time with this, PERIOD?

You have got to be kidding right—?

Are you pretending that anyone of any sign "Likes" being told how to live their life? Or even that the astro sign has anything to do with being able to accept constructive criticism, self-righteous or self-centeredness?

Personally, I find that has more to do with maturity and humility, Not what sign a person is, and I've found ppl guilty of these shortcomings in every sign. But please, please know that you have the right to carryon with your judgemental assumptions, unless that is, you can accept constructive ciritism that if you don't agree with me you are just Wrong and you being Self-Rightous in thinking you are not guilty of the same characteristics.

I respectfully but strongly disagree with both of you silly ppl!

Abling,

I think everyone is different. Gotta stop putting the blame on people at some point regardless of your sign. I know a lot of people who blame others. It doesn't matter what sign they are. I will admit, when I was younger, I would certainly blame others. Then I got a good kick in the arse and was showed a different way to live life. If you constantly blame others then you get nowhere in life.

Who me? agree? R U Sure? 🙂

Actually, I have found other signs to be much more stubborn and self-righteous than crabs, but ya know, that's just my take....

Have a good one! I gotta run 🙂

Thanks, Ldybg377...My graduation was wonderful!..sucks you cant have those moments a couple of times in your life! And thanks so much for those words of wisdom, it helped!

Stardance, I must not have clarified my question very well...I didn't mean telling someone what to do as criticizing their way of thinking and self actions, and forcing your own opinions on them....Of course that would make anyone annoyed. But I do get where it does lie on learned character traits, as you stated, however that's true for everything that is on this site. SOme are just more true for certain people, and that's where all this astrology mystery stems from. We're able to see how and why we are able to cope with difft situations...yes a lot is learned, but we all beleive in the stars right? Hence, the question...=)

My question was about the sun sign, Cancer, and if they take it especially harder when a loved one, or close friend offers them advice, for whatever reason..Are Cancers usually the ones who don't like to be questioned on their actions? It could be in the workplace as well...b/c I read somewhere that cancers have a hard time taking orders from their higher ups if they feel like its something they dont agree with..i.e they like to do things their way only...TRUE?

pisvesgrl...& Ladybg,

You both obviously have strong opinions of cancers and I do find it interesting that I have not had great experiences with pisces either. The ones I have met are very quick to make judgement and tell others what they should believe in and find fault in everyone but themselves and then can't understand why those persons don't want to hold their precious hand....—

What the stars say is not simply that cancers are stubborn or resistant in accepting loving advice, which btw, if someone hasn't clued you in, it is only advice when it is sought out....it is trying to tell someone how to live when you feel the need to give advice that wasn't asked for, I hope you can figure this out, or you'll find amazingly that it is not only cancers that don't like that. But back to my point, mature cancers are deep spiritual thinkers and will not hesitate to resist that which they do not Believe In or worse that which they Believe Strongly Against and are willing to suffer the consequences of that resistance. They are warriors in their beliefs.

Lady, as far as your offer, "help me help you." Thanks, but your paranoia about evil stares and your general disdain of cancers just doesn't appeal to my better judgement as someone I would seek advice from.

Good luck to ya both.....Too doo loo!

OKAY people, I think my question has went off into irrelevant tangents....=)

I wanted to know how cancer's deal or cope with someone giving them advice on a situation, if the person doesn't agree with them, how do you all handle it? B/C you all know sometimes we need help in solving things or we're not sure how to...HOw does the cancer man deal with it? I'm sure you've all had experiences like this right? even with everyday friends.

AS for me....I love it when people tell me things, or tell me a better way to do it (like my close friends)..Because I love to hear different opinions and thoughts, Im not close minded!PLus I was on the debate team for 3 years in college..I don't get mad, ever, only time I would is if someone physically intervened in my life...NO NO, I wouldn't go for that(like my mother tried to do one time by calling my boss and telling him I needed to stop working so much!!) words of wisdom/encouragement, whether it be disagreed upon or not, I'm very humble in that sense. At the end of the day, I know I have, me, myself, and I still making my decisions for me. I had someone tell me something that made me really THINK, when I thought I knew what I was doing....SO see?! I am one person who doesn't get annoyed at that.

Ldybg377....Yes you are right, when I looked at your profile I saw that you have an aries moon...from knowing what part the moon sign plays in personality, that might be a contributing factor!! sucks right?! aries are sometimes strong, independent, yet sometimes place the facade to cover up from any insecurities and fear. Im sure thats hard with a sun in Pisces. I read a book that says what really matches perfectly is if the womans moon is in the same sign as the man's sun.

Picsesgrl, O.K., if your choice of words on your topic (which very clearly stated "telling a cancer how to live") misrepresented what you were really asking..And you really Meant is...How do you deal with constructuve suggestions. I think it would matter deeply on the subject. If you say to me, you know, I can get the potatoes peeled much faster if I wet them down first than if I try to peel them when their dry. Have you ever tried it that way? I would say, gee, no, but I hate how long it takes me so let me try and see if I can do it faster by rinsing them first, then when I'm done I could say, you know, I've been peeling them dry and rinsing afterwords for so long, it slowed me down to peel them wet. Then you could say, well, I guess there is more than one fast way to peel a potatoe and I guess everyone has a way that works best for them.

On the other hand, if you say to me, you really should buy only organic foods and never never use chlorine to scrub out your sink, it's causes cancer, and don't use any insecticides, and really you shouldn't use makeup unless it's lable states no animals were used to test the product, and there is only natural products in it. I would say, well you know, I won't tell you what to believe and how to live your life, and I expect you not to try to tell me how to live my life. Live and let live is the only way we can continue to interact, if you can't do that, then it's best you find someone else to preach to.

I realize you asked in your last post, how would you Men deal with this? I would suspect most would answer the same, but if I'm wrong, I hope they will share their opinion with me. And I don't necessarily agree that being in a debate team makes you a better partner in a relationship. I think it would get tiring to be questioned and debated on all life choices.

Does any cancer men have any input on how they react when someone tries to give them advice? or are Cancer men usually headstrong on their beliefs? You guys aren't the "just go along, to get along with everyone" types right? ANY insight would be great!

You are right Ladybg, we, you included, can all be head strong if it is something we feel strongly about, would you agree. Or do you think you are not headstrong yourself?...Has anyone given you the advice that they thought you were headstrong? If so, how did you deal with it. Just curious...

"That is my opinion and I am sticking to it, Gosh Darn it!!!!! LOL J/K"

Sounds like a good opinion to me.....but you still sound a bit crabby by your own standard..LOL

It is true that cancers in general do NOT like being told what to do.

But like anything with cancers, its not so much "what you say" as it is "how you say it".......A scorpio or pisces could probably get a cancer to do almost anything simply because they know how to phrase things with care.

What bothers cancers more than anything is not you having an opinion but you not having any tact...we think its rude and uncaring....primarily because we are masters of word selection ourselves and tend to know the power of how choosing words can cause a range of emotions and reactions from the same basic words. We think its crass and cold to not care to phrase things in a soft tone becuase since we often try to do that for other people then obviously they don't appreciate that if they aren't willing to do it back...its the same way that pisces are about all the little things they'll do to meet your needs.

When giving a cancer advice, try positioning what you have to say as "YOUR OPINION" of what they should do, and not "WHAT THEY SHOULD DO BASED ON YOUR WORD WHICH IS INFALLABLE LAW" lol.....try that and I promise you it will work wonders.

Ldybg377...

First you say,

"After I worked with the two faced Beotch Cancer woman I thought, ok, one bad experience don't give up on the sign....This is one sign that totally can get under my skin and make me want to jump out of my skin. It is in my inherent nature to think optimistically and that is why I came back to this board to see if I can get some understanding about you crabs."

Then you say,

"That is what is interesting crabs seem to take everything so personally."


If you would really like to understand, it may be a better strategy to just ask specific questions instead of blunt statements laced with insults about cancers. Would it really make sense for me to as you "hey ldybg377, I'm trying to understand you but based on every other pisces I know, I think you guys are some pretty f--ed up beeooyythces.....can you help me?"...lol....don't you think that sounds a bit absurd/schizo?

you can more flies with honey and vinegar...and you won't catch ANY cancers with vinegar...you'll only get ignored or attached (clawed).

So why do you (without insults or put downs) give us a specific question on our nature and see what you get back? I'm sure it will be more productive than your previous attempts.

If this is how you've talked to cancers in the past, I'm not surprised if you've caught an occassional evil stare or crab claw across the head. You don't insult people and then ask for their help and compassion. To a cancer that comes across as fake, disingenuous, and two-faced.

please forgive the typos above

you can more flies = you can catch more flies

So why do you = So why don't you


P.S.....there is no more sure way to turn OFF a cancer than to be so clumsy and unskilled with how you talk to them that you cannot help yourself but to insult them. And then to ask "why do you guys take stuff so personal" after you've insulted them just makes you look crazy to a cancer.

Its like me slapping you as hard as I can (regardless of my intention to do so....cancers hate carlessness as much as we hate bad intentions...they are equal to us because if we matter to you, you'd take the extra care....like you do with your most prized possessions) and then asking you "why is your face red? Your skin should be thicker"....lol

"This is the part that astonishes me. Cancers can be rude and offensive to anyone else but when it come to having it come thier way they turn into major bithches and markers. "

lol....ok M Ldy....love you much but now you are just a bit ridiculous and laughable...


you OPENED with the insults before any cancer said anything derrogatory to you. Then claimed to not be willing to "lay down" after they RESPONDED to your insults. Do see how c-r-a-z-y that sounds?

All that I am suggesting, is that you temporarily put aside all of your baggage from past cancer experiences IF what you TRULY want is to learn as opposed to vent your opinions.....you are talking about cancers that you have dealt with in the past, and you want to open your discussion with cancers that you've NEVER MET with indictments of people that we don't even know....chill on the antagonism and y ou may get what you want.

I'm still waiting for that straight-foward, thought-provoking question but I haven't seen one yet from you. It seems that you came here to vent, not understand.

A person who can't help themselves but to vent when it is uncalled for will send a crab moving in the opposite direction for sure....

Another thing M Ldy,

"Please don't get your feelings hurt, because what I am about to say may make you angry. I don't know if I care enough to be careful how I word things to be quiet honest. This probably explains why I will always have a big distance with Cancers. I don't want to have relationships, friendships, or even aquanitance that I have to be walk on eggshells and be careful of "how I word stuff or be worried about how upset it makes you. I want to be me, and perhaps some of my wording is blunt, bold, and maybe offensive to you. I am sorry Cancers but it is a cruel world out there and the reality is not everyone is going to stop and think, gee I better make sure I am wording my questions, statements, and phrases to not offend anyone."

lol....someone who doesn't care to watch out they word things only shows a person who lack self control, and probably has marginal people skills meaning that MANY people more than likely can't stand or can hardly get along with that person. Its so funny when people talk about how they don't want to "watch their words"...you would think you were asking them to perform brain surgery on siamese quadruplets. Its a matter of being polite. And if someone is incapable of that, they only come across crass and uncivilized.

And as far as the "cruel world" bit, we are very well aware of that....we expect the world to be cruel and we can be more than mean enough to deal with it...what we DON'T expect (and won't tolerate) is someone who is attempting to be a freind/lover/what have you that doesn't have the sense to be a little nicer to someone who they are trying to engage than they are with the rest of the world...and then their a $ $ hole nature suddenly becomes OUR problem....lol

truly absurd.

GUYS, GUYS, GUYS..Ldybg377, CancerLA, thank you guys so much for the conversing because it made me understand it a lot better. CancerLA, I wish I could talk with you one on one more often! =)
I do have to say that I don't think Ldybg377 was insulting all cancers by calling her co-worker a b****. I think you might have taken it personally when she stated "how do I understand cancers", you shouldnt take that personally. THere could be a number of reasons why this person acted like that..maybe her moon/rising sign makes her a crabby crabby girl. Trust me, at my reasearch job there are two leo women...one is the biggest b*** I have ever met, we've had confrontations! then theres the sweet one, whom is like a mary poppins, no joke I love her to death! cant understand it for the world!

Once in a greaaaat while I go off on a rant and get into this whole 'preaching' mode LOL Well, so I've noticed... crabby does not like that. The one time I did it he seemed to get annoyed and when I laughed and told him he said he didn't like being preached to ha ha haha ha ooooooooooooooooh but HE can! Mr.KNOW-IT-ALL-BIG-TIME! But alright, whatever... I'll give you an ear, why not? LOL

And crabbies do take into account HOW ppl say things! THAT is where my crabby shows that he IS in fact a part of the crab brotherhood lol There has been times when he's said "It was the tone of your voice" And I'm definitely not rude, crude or blunt (ummmm not most of the time atleast) I am quite aware of how I deliver my words, how and when I say something to someone and even to whom... however... I still thought that was odd! I don't pay attention to the way people say things... in my mind, people are different and can't help being the way they are (ofcourse I DO KNOW and sense if something is said a certain way for a reason) but other than that you won't ruffle my feathers... I pick out the info, meaning, the point and that's that. But I don't know, it was just WEIRD to me... like him paying attention to that lol Oh and he was wrong by the way LOL That's really the reason why people have to watch how they say things even closer... mostly though, I'd rather the crabby get used to me... walking on eggshells won't do anyone any good (as long as you're not an ass ya know lol)

once again....asking for a chill pill on a b!tchy tone takes an act of God to get from someone....with cancers, its not so much "not being able to handle" what you people are saying (or how you're saying it), but not wanting to be bothered or put up with it. Cancers have a great need for peace...and personalities that project tendencies contrary to that are as annoying to us as a swarm of gnats on an open wound. We'd just rather not communicate with people who have to do that....why is this rocket science—

But its not.

The primary people who have the problem with it are the drama queens and kings that "just can't help themselves" but to have "chronic diarrhea of the mouth".

They'll do something like, launch into a tirade at the top of their lungs....but its OUR problem that we'd rather they not scream (is that really necessary or are you just bipolar)...or they'll sling some insult and the Cancer, being very perceptive will call them on the tone knowing that the comment was meant to take a jab....then they back up and are like "what? all I said was yadda yadda yadda"..yeah, right. lol. And I was born this morning.

piscesgrl you can private message me anytime you have a 1 on 1 question....=)

I normally wouldn't say anything but I do find this truth about Cancer's. They say what the hell they want and then want you to be nice to them if it was something offensive to you. WTF is up with that? I don't think that's right. They hurt your feelings and then you are supposed to treat theirs with "kid gloves" and i have had my share of Cancers so I know this to be the truth.

then with those people you treat them just as they treat you....but everyone is not like that.

M Ldy....lol....my response to you wasn't about me taking anything personally...it was giving you a pointer on how you may want to change your approach to asking for help...which to date, is still a failure.

Like I said earlier, it is clear that you came here primarily to vent.

Fine.

Vent.

Most people aren't rude. Second, NO ONE likes to be talked to in a rude manner no matter what their sign is. Third, no one is going to like to be sugarcoating their words all the time because they're afraid someone else is gonna take it the wrong way and boohoo about it like a little beotch. I personally despise people who always take every fukkin little dumb thing to heart. Hyper-sensitive sissies get the worst from others... why? I'm not sure, I just suspect they are painfully annoying.

Then on another note... MY crabby isn't hyper-sensitive lol He can take the beating from this bull when she gets aggressive and woweeeeeeeee what a turn on! muah ha hahaha... yummmmmmmmmmmmy

😛

Who is boo-hooing? Aparently you have't read...

I read... some...

Wasn't pointing fingers or limiting my comment to any one sign in particular.

gotcha.....well your opinion is heard and respected. And I see your point.

My only thing as far as cancers go is that I feel that a lot of people interpret as "running and crying" is simply not wanting to be bothered with them. Not being able to "handle" someone and just not wanting to put up with them are two different things....but many times people will say "you just can't handle my strong personality" in order to project the negative away from them and onto other people.

Its like a 500 pound woman that tells a guy, "you're just not man enough to handle aaaaalllllllll this woman" .........yeah right.

They guy is just normal sized, thinks you're disgusting, and would never come within a mile of a bed you were in...lol