Water or Oil off a duck—s back?

CANCERS: How long does it take you to get over a slight? What's your long term reaction? Maybe it has come from a work colleague, school mate etc. who has disrespected you, insulted you or disrupted your sense of security.

Can you separate from the action even though you are not close to the person, or will they forever be in your bad books?

I should give the story that sparked this question.

My Pisces has a groupie. He's in music so you get them. They usually admire from afar or they??re gone as fast as they come... but ever so often there is one that wants to cross the line.

This one popped up a few months ago, she's a known musician ho, nice enough girl. I didn't pay her no mind since she was chasing a drummer. Now, it seems she's moved on to my Pisces. Last time I was out, she kept interrupting me and Pisces, trying to get his attention and being confrontational with me to the point I had to ask her what her problem was. She backed off but left me with a weird wtf? feeling.

I'm not fb friends with my Man but his page is public, so anyone can see it. This girl likes every pic he's in, comments on all his posts and shows up at all the shows. A few days ago he tells me he's ignored a couple messages from her, asking him about his —artistic inspirations.?? please..

My reaction is... typical for me. I'm territorial and have a bad temper. I had some things to say about thirsty women. I also had some things to say about men not setting boundaries soon enough because sometimes ignoring thirsty women makes them come on stronger, just to get a reaction. I said these things loudly. 🙂 Pisces knows me and knows I'm going to go through my thing. (He also secretly loves it when I loose it) He tells me, lets me vent and doesn't tell me to —relax??, thank jesus.

*tip: don't ever tell a Cancer to relax when they??re emotional*

It took 3 days for me to calm myself completely and work through all my emotions. I felt: Disgusted that there are so many thirsty women out there. Fear, that this girl wouldn't stop. (stalker phobia) Pissed because my feelings were hurt. I felt my security was being threatened. Vulnerable... because I got so possessive. I??ve dealt with groupies before but this one (Taurus btw) seemed like she was ready to challenge/compete with me. I really hate that.

Other signs may be able to shake these things easier but stuff like this hits my core. I'll never be able to speak to this girl again without having evil thoughts.

ya, i agree emotional state, motivation/intentions of the other person has a lot to do with my long term reaction

Posted by CluelessCancer
knock the bytch out. Nobody touches your man!

My sentiment exactly.

Just make sure this psycho girl's pursuit of your man is met "with an unfortunate accident."

oops, she fell down a flight of stairs? The darndest things these days!

Posted by ScorpioFish

Posted by CluelessCancer
knock the bytch out. Nobody touches your man!

My sentiment exactly.

Just make sure this psycho girl's pursuit of your man is met "with an unfortunate accident."

oops, she fell down a flight of stairs? The darndest things these days!

click to expand

would LOVE to!

but honestly, it would probably turn her ego on... getting that type of reaction. what these thirsty girls fail to realize is their actions can further cement a healthy relationship. they are so blinded by what they wish/hope/want they live a fiction in their head

when in reality... they increase the Man's ego. If the man has a healthy ego... he may feel compelled to protect his women from vultures like these and comfort her with lots of sex 🙂

"It took 3 days for me to calm myself completely and work through all my emotions. I felt: Disgusted that there are so many thirsty women out there. Fear, that this girl wouldn't stop. (stalker phobia) Pissed because my feelings were hurt. I felt my security was being threatened. Vulnerable... because I got so possessive. I??ve dealt with groupies before but this one (Taurus btw) seemed like she was ready to challenge/compete with me. I really hate that."

not a cancer but his profile is public, does he have "in a relationship" on there so the "thirsty" girls would back off?

Alot of women who are single for example, are looking for "the one" or the man that they "desire", so if they have no boundaries or respect, they're going to keep on going unless the man himself tells the woman to stop. It will shame them that they were refused blatantly. Maybe get the woman upset and hurt, but rejection is terrible so they might yell back and say something like, "well you didnt say anything to stop me, ect"

Posted by lisabethur8

Alot of women who are single for example, are looking for "the one" or the man that they "desire", so if they have no boundaries or respect, they're going to keep on going unless the man himself tells the woman to stop. It will shame them that they were refused blatantly. Maybe get the woman upset and hurt, but rejection is terrible so they might yell back and say something like, "well you didnt say anything to stop me, ect"

Pisces did shut her down with 2 sentences... in that fishy way where you know you??ve been insulted... but it's so subtle you??re not sure what just happened.

My question was more about how am I going to handle myself in her presence, without being passively aggressive or catty.

Thanks for your comments.

Women in groups have a natural competitive nature, sometimes healthy/sometimes not.

The feminist movement was said to unit women and help them rise above oppression by men. Maybe, but it was mainly to give women buying power as consumers. In traditional settings, women gathered in families/communities/villages etc. and there was, still is a kind of pecking order.

I think every female has been in this situation before. Having another woman blatantly challenge their position with a man, within a group/community etc.

I don't know why it still surprises me. I don't know why my feelings are personally hurt by such things.

I don't like anyone that doesn't respect my relationships or me in general. I hope everything works out and she gets mauled by a bunch of horny bears.

Posted by shellshocker
CANCERS: How long does it take you to get over a slight? What's your long term reaction? Maybe it has come from a work colleague, school mate etc. who has disrespected you, insulted you or disrupted your sense of security.

Can you separate from the action even though you are not close to the person, or will they forever be in your bad books?

To answer this original question, it depends on the type of slight and how well of a grip a Cancer has on their feelings.
As far as slights go, there was a description of Cancer on the interwebs that something to the effect of "don't ever deliberately do something to hurt a Cancer, ever".
In that particular case, the answer is that a Cancer will never forget (they rarely do, anyway) and will never forgive completely.

Other slights, if it is realized that there were extenuating circumstances, a Cancer will eventually "get over it", even if they may bring it up at a later time (did I mention they never forget? Although it may be a joke later on).