CapRookie

Gosh, I'm such a fool. How did I manage to be taken advantage of, by so freaking naive. I don't know whether to cry, feign indifference or hand in there in hopes he will be more sure of his feelings. But mostly, I think I want to be angry and have a good cry. I'm so sorry to join your board only to dump, but I came across some of your posts and it seems there are a lot of cappy's out there causing havoc in our hearts. Yes the sex was pretty good cap man....but the whole package just leaves me feeling used, dirty and not looking foward to more of the same.

If I could just vent a little, I don't have anywhere else to turn with me sorrow, and I'm hoping someone here can help me make sense of it all. This is the first cap man I have known closely. We WERE together for about 6 months and today he spewed some good double talk and I feel like I have a stomach flu in my heart.

I feel ya girl!!!!! DONT CALL HIM!!

just go through and read..... then we will all be here with open arms!!

Welcome

Love, GEG

Thanks GEG...., God know I need the support tonight.......I can't belive the backend of the donkey said I was nothing more than someone he likes. He talks big about being passionate in his Christian faith, but some how he just couldn't resist passionate pursuing me for 3 months (before the 6 we've been together)before I decided I could trust a gentle Christian man with my heart. Could someone please tell me, how can a Christian man bed down a nice girl and then say they are just friends, while he calmly mentions that he spend the weekend with another woman friend!!!!!!

I guess I should be ashamed that I didn't make sure he really cared first..I'm mostly angry with myself.....

I think I'll follow the advice on how tro loose a guy.....I don't want to call him....I am pretty, I am smart, I am sweet and fun and loving and he is the fool, so why do I still feel sick?

He has kept in touch pretty well, a couple times a week but I guess he is just not that into me and I should move on. I think I'll go have that cry now, remembering his sweet words of flattery, now I better take a deep breath to soak in the truth. I'm sorry to be such a downer....I was just hoping somehow this would help me feel better if I could vent, but I think I just need to let it hurt....

Thanks capman, Maybe you are right, I hope so, but he still says I am just a friend....I am just so confused....

o.k. this is a gentle """""""SMACK SMACK""""""""" I know it hurts but pick your self up off the floor girl!!!! And first let me tell you this No Christian is perfect all people make mistakes! But honey I know that it hurts But trustttttt me... you are going to be fine!! Have you read all the stuff on this board? if not hop to it!! Cause reading all of our stuff will one keep your mind of the pain and 2 having you sitting there shaking your head saying OMG are we talking about the same man? I know its hurts I know you feel "USED or taken for" but come on honey you know you have more class than that!!! Other wise Im not sure he would have pursued you in the first place... and for as long as he did... three months is a long time to chase after a girl for just some booty!! and we all know how hot these men are so its not like its hard to get any... Im sorry sweetie I may sound brutal but im not!! I just want you to snap out of the depression sot hen we can talk about the work that can or cant be done!!

calm down, release all your built up anger! And Pray!! Trust me after you pray you will begin to feel better!!


love, GEG

yeah... it sucks, and it's way easier said than done... i just want to say that i find something ironic, everybody on here says cap guys don't like games, but my cap is the one who plays games, he likes to make things as 'fun' and 'mysterious' as possible... it kind of intrigues me... i hate it, but i love it.

I'm sorry capman and GEG, I'm still just sobbing. I have spent the last two hours reading the posts to see if they can help me understand. It started when I told him that I fell in love with him, he was cold silent and that tormented me, I thought he would be so happy about it. finally asked to tell me what I meant to him, and he said that he liked me a lot, but that he didn't trust his feelings and that we need patience and discipline. Now he apologized for getting physical too soon....

Okay- I just have to shout out here... I don't want to make her feel worse or bad, but need to have eyes-wide-open... "A friend" to these guys, in my experience, is not always a strictly platonic relationship. They want "friends w/ benefits" relationships- that is their ideal arrangement- and they hate to be pinned down to the labels of a relationship. So, that "friend" word is way overused and misused, from MY experience. ( MyCap's experience has been the same, if I recall.) Whenever things get "sticky", too emotional, too "closing in" and resembling a relationship, thye will pull "the friends card" whether it's on YOU, who is clearly not a friend, or in describing another woman- who may just be an easy lay for him but don't ever assume it's just a buddy-buddy thing.

I sure get the feeling that he is back stepping and the comment about the spending the weekend with a woman friend just felt like blood on steel. I had called him on Sat morn and he just called back today with only a few minutes to talk....

im sorry sweetie but if you have read ALL the posts you will notice that all this is normal.. how old are you if you dont mind me asking..?

I gave him my heart before I allowed him to touch me, I waited to see if that was all he was interested in, and it seemed he was interested in all of me, not just my flesh. I would not ever intentionally drop comments about men friends...I have men friends, but I don't even let them hug me for fear they might take it the wrong way. I like to communicate the opposite, "you are special to me, you are the one I chose"... Maybe she is just a friend, maybe he loves sex I was just a conquest for him. I just know that I am completely crushed by all this. Your right capgirl, I need to pick myself up from this wallow.

Just get smarter... It may not be over; it probably isn't. If you pick back up with him, don't go "there" again until you can trust him. You have to realize that few men, especially Cap. men, are going to outright reciprocate (return) an "I love you" on the spot, face-to-face like that. It's really rare- especially on a first time hearing it from you. I know you wanted the romantic exchange of him telling you the same, but it doesn't mean that he's not feeling the same deep down.

I am finally feeling better, I'm starting to make a little sense, and I thank you capgirl and capman, I think I should wait things out a bit longer before I look elsewhere. But I also want to back off myself, this really hurt and I'm not real excited to go through this again. GEG, I know Christians aren't perfect, I know I'm not. I guess I assumed he would not have taken it this far unless his intentions were for a lasting relationship.

Thank you all so much.....although I'll probably still shed a few more tears tonight that he can't tell me how he feels about me, his actions have been more clear than his words, so I'll hang on to that for now.

good girl!!! Its o.k. to cry sweetie just dont drown your self 😉

Wounded... mine is Catholic (like me) and military, too, and always seemed upstanding, also. I think when they get scared by the "love" part of sex (emotions), it all gets confusing for them and you, and no amount of religion can take away that momentary or lingering fear.

woundedlove, welcome.


Capricorn men are usually a little different from the main stream, they keep their feelings hidden deep down, fall into 'moods', use strange words to express themselves and their relationship to the 'woman' in their lives, they can pull back like no bodies business, they can laugh in your face or remain totally silent when you express intimate details.

I fear you may have scared the cr/ap out of him when you told him you loved him....I am following the golden capricorn rule, "dont tell them you love/like them until they tell you." I admit I may be waiting a long, long time for this but I would rather wait then scare the poor bugger off. : )

OK, my advice, and this is just my advice so please take it with a grain of salt... is to pick yourself up off the floor, get busy with some project, talk to friends and family, read, sleep, and look after yourself. Wait a couple days, if he doesn't call, open communication with him, be brief and to the point, as well as honest. If he says he only wants to be your friend, push him a little on it, say "I dont think that is true," "or ask him if he afraid of being hurt." WARNING you may end up doing all the talking and he may just stare at you and say nothing.

Good luck