Sometimes I feel like a rock...

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Capricorn Guy
@Capricorn Guy
20 Years

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I've noticed more and more recently that I've started to care less about people. And that my own want for another has waned. I've been lonely for the past few months. And today it's a bit depressing. I started talking to a girl online but, things progressed further than I wanted and it seemed like it would be to much repsonsiblity to continue further. But we didn't go much farther than talking on the phone. I tried talking to someone online because I felt at one point it might be the only way I'd meet someone again. But after I've done it I feel that I really don't want anyone.

This to me is destressing because I've wanted to have someone in my life for a while. I've wanted to make someone happy. But now I feel like a rock, cold, and alone. I've felt this way other times but in different ways. I've felt that sometimes I am a stable piece in the ocean of life that my friends clung too. I've also felt like I was merely a stepping stone for someone to move up on.

I don't really know whats going on, and I'm not sure what I want. There are things I do, projects I have that I care for and work very hard to accomplish. I have something to do during all the waking hours of my days. Weekdays, weekends, holidays etc. etc. etc. I don't know if I'd be good to anyone the way I am. I don't think I can handle the responisbilities of a relationship anymore. I grow sad when I think about how alone I am, when I see to people in love and the joy it brings to them. I feel cold and empty, like a hollow rock.
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tripomaxx
@tripomaxx
20 Years

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Well my friend,
Do take it easy. You are not the only one facing such problem. I am experiencing the same thing in my life. Everytime I dream of that special one, a woman to love and to share life with, it only seems to be a distant dream. I've been rejected so many times now that everything doesn't make sense anymore. All the women seems to interested in jerks instead of caring guys like us. Anyhow, take it easy.
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Josh
@Josh
20 YearsCapricorn

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This is what I think:

1.) Love is what you make of it. It is just like Isaac Newton's 3rd Law of Motion- every action has a reaction of equal force in the opposite direction. You get back what you put in, but you have to put time, energy, and money in to get anything back.

2.) A dream is a dream. There is no such thing as a perfect woman. The female sex advertizes the same about men everywhere every day, and as they say, women are always right and therefore must know some underlying truth about humanity.

3.) If you are willing to look, there is a woman (and 1/4) for every male on the planet. That's right, 5 women to every man on Earth. You just need to go digging, and with your obviously analytical and practical business-like mind, you just might be able to pick out one who complements you.

4.) I emplore you, do not think of me as trying to act my age. I may be 18, but my love life is about as fulfilled as yours, except for the fact that I have 4 years of parties and women to look forward to interspersed with my own hard work. (:-)) I also realize that I have no answers and I am trying to act like I do, but I am an actor and a writer by reputation, and so I just hope you find what answers you are looking for. Meanwhile, I gotta go step on some more toes and start some revolutions of thought-- at my last highschool dance (not including prom)!
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kiwigrl
@kiwigrl
20 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 53 · Topics: 10
I think cappies are a bit lazy when it comes to making and maintaing a relatinship.
It takes a 'clever' Gemini, or an impulsive sexy 'Aries', or a Libra to lure 'us' out of our shells.
A deep Scorpio and an Emotional Pisces will also take us a long way; here sex and love will be out of this world.
We just need to learn to give, as well as receive, enjoy the moment, be consistant, and have genuine, no-care-less fun, 'and 'cry' once in a while. Oh, and see that romantic movie with our loved one(s)
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Freebird
@Freebird
20 Years1,000+ Posts

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Josh,

YOU are an incredible writer who is able to express your thoughts very well. I marvel in the "thinking" of each one of us.

Here is what I think:

1.) Once we can understand that we cannot understand each person and accept this and them for who they are, we then gain a sense of freedom.

2.) The second that we are given the breath of life, we are subject to anything and everything that life contains. The outcome of each circumstance will depend on how each one of us chooses to respond, our attitude.

3.) The more relationships that we are blessed with, the more we find out who we are.

4.) Love is an ongoing learning process. It comes in many forms....there is no one way to love but yet, love is all.

5.) Love and Fear cannot exist at the same time, therefore, choose love in each moment and your time here on earth will be one heck of a ride.

6.) It's ALL good. 🙂

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GoldAngl2
@GoldAngl2
20 Years

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I know how you feel....I hear that Capricorn depression coming through. Don't feel bad there are a lot of us out there that feel the same way and are in the same place you are. Wanting a relationship but not wanting to put the effort into it for it to go south again.

When you say your the person your friends come to when they need someone. Most capricorns are. We also find when we need our friends to be there for us they seem to be to busy for that. Our problems is that we don't tell them that there are times we need them also. Tell them!

If chatting with someone on-line helps then do it but be honest and upfront. Tell them you want a relationship but are not sure your willing to put the effort into one right now. There are people out there who feel the same way.

I keep finding men who want to be friends with benefits.....what happen to just being friends frist. Meeting for dinner...movie...or drinks....just to talk and hang out. If things move forward then great but the pressure would be off to impress someone.

I have a lot of men asking for my attention but I'm upfront....one of the first thing I ask someone I meet is what are you looking for? If they want to be friends with benefits I tell them to move on...that's not me. I'm not going to be that way just to have someone around sometimes.

When you are truly ready and open it will happen and sometimes it will be so right that it won't seem like your putting a lot of effort into it.....it will just fit.

Good luck and best wishes.
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james tate
@james tate
20 Years10,000+ PostsCapricorn

Comments: 3 · Posts: 15387 · Topics: 830
Well interresting point. I will want to look my best.last appearance you know. I think it should be at the cathedral here in canterbury kent. They could lay me out at witherspoons pub then have a procession to the cathedral. The arch bishop could do the service. Then back to the pub a bit of whisky for everyone. I will have to plan well in advance Den will need time to find a date for the funeral. I know the protocol for a widow but what is the correct etiquette and precedence for a shacket. I know she will be horney after the funeral. Shes always horney after funerals and weddings something in her head about the passage of time. I hope she is a bit discreet and not bang him in the clock room are on the coffin.Oh well lets plan it for a fortnight.
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Freebird
@Freebird
20 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 0 · Posts: 4935 · Topics: 117
Mr. James Tate,

You sound as if to be a very distiquished gentleman who loves to plan and is very detailed. I shall like to attend such an exciting event. Do they have fries at the pub? Can we take a buggie ride to the Cathedral? I have a lot of experience as a "clock room watcher" and I could hang out there to watch for Den. I have also been involved with "coffin catching" and I can help in that area as well. What type of flowers do you like or is there something else you would prefer? Such as, old whisky bottles?

I must say that you have quite an imagination and I hope that you are not leaving planet earth anytime soon. I like not knowing my check-out time.
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james tate
@james tate
20 Years10,000+ PostsCapricorn

Comments: 3 · Posts: 15387 · Topics: 830
My Dear Freebird

I love the name freebird. Everone thinks Brits are intelligent intellectuals because of the accent. When I was in america if I spoke everyone would stop and listen. I could say the dog is taking a dump and everyone would say did you hear what James said. Oh my what did he mean. then someone would say I don't know but it must be important. It was more like impertinent.
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james tate
@james tate
20 Years10,000+ PostsCapricorn

Comments: 3 · Posts: 15387 · Topics: 830
My dear Gwendylyn afert a couple outings she would soon discover how rude the English men can be. When and English man is caught being improper or wrong he will turn into a pompous ass. I do speak with a British accent but I am Welsh not English. The English want you to think they are as the french say au fait (fully competent fully informed socially correct) not.
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Scorpionlady
@Scorpionlady
20 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 0 · Posts: 3537 · Topics: 116
Dear Capricorn Guy,

I feel so much compansion for you. It is sad that a nice person like yourself feel like you can not handle a relationship or that it is to much for you my since you are so busy doing other things to keep you busy. Have you ever thought that being with a women who really cares about you and spending time with them doing fun things will keep you busy. What really urks me about Cappies is that it is not that you are to busy it could be that you don't know how. My cappy thinks that if he can't do it right then he will not do it at all. If that is the case then do it right the first time. But little do he know he had better do something or he is really going to feel like crap. We just started a relationship that he made the decision on and I have not spent any time with him since. Why you ask? I have no damn Idea, and at this point I am not going to question his actions. I know me and if he don't do something soon I will lose this wierd as man that I am so IN LOVE WITH LOL