Why is this Capricorn Woman playing mind games?

What should I do she is driving me up a tree, When we first met she came on really strong and was flirting with me like I was the best thing in the world, then she suddenly pulled away and acted like she hated me for no reason, I then decided to talk to her about it, she said she had nothing against me, so I was happy, I finally felt like everything was cleared up, but it's not she seems to be testing me even more now, she watches everything I do so closely, we work together, sometimes I catch her looking at me and she is giving me this deathly serious look just staring at me, and I don't know what to do??_. I try to smile but she usually just looks away??_. (But then other days she tries flirting with me, she likes it when I act distant??_.) I have been making more of an effort to talk to her and be friendlier some days she talks to me other days she goes back to hating me??_ I don't know what to do anymore, I really do like her but her behavior is making it so hard for me to even want to continue getting to know her, I just need some advice from you Capricorn ladies please!

I forgot to add that she has A Capricorn sun and mercury but also has a Cancer Moon do you think that causes her to be at odds with her own feelings a lot?

Posted by capcsw
This post will help you!

http://www.dxpnet.com/opinion/capricorn/How-To-Get-Your-Goat-Interactive-DIY-[Fun]-3114880.asp

I already read that in detail, do you have any advice for me? I just wish she would ease up around me it's always so tense and heavy when we are around each other.

Posted by champranger

Posted by FieryAries9108
What should I do she is driving me up a tree, When we first met she came on really strong and was flirting with me like I was the best thing in the world, then she suddenly pulled away and acted like she hated me for no reason, I then decided to talk to her about it, she said she had nothing against me, so I was happy, I finally felt like everything was cleared up, but it's not she seems to be testing me even more now, she watches everything I do so closely, we work together, sometimes I catch her looking at me and she is giving me this deathly serious look just staring at me, and I don't know what to do??_. I try to smile but she usually just looks away??_. (But then other days she tries flirting with me, she likes it when I act distant??_.) I have been making more of an effort to talk to her and be friendlier some days she talks to me other days she goes back to hating me??_ I don't know what to do anymore, I really do like her but her behavior is making it so hard for me to even want to continue getting to know her, I just need some advice from you Capricorn ladies please!

I'm not a Cap, but may I ask how do you know she hates you, and what you mean by acted like she hates you?

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Well she was really obvious in her flirting and then all the sudden she stopped, and did not flirt at all and when I mean obvious I mean like one time she almost laid on a table where I was sitting to get my attention, after that she got really distant and would act really nervous or uncomfortable if i even looked at her, she completely ignores me still if I am close, she talks a little more now, but it's is still really uncomfortable, she really just acts horribly uncomfortable if I look at her for any length of time/ if i try to flirt with her, and she talks so comfortably around other co workers and goes out of the way to talk to some, but she never goes out of her way to talk to me, and when we talk you could technically cut the tension with a knife, I don't know it seems obvious that she doesn't like me/ that I make her uncomfortable.

Posted by CapGal
No FieryA, she doesn't hate you. Seems she's very attracted to you amd from my own experience, I tend to stay away from guys I'm attracted to cuz I get nervous around them, maybe stutter and make a fool of myself. So to ensure I don't make a fool of myself, I'll hang with just about anyone else, except that guy that's so irresistable.

I remember some time ago we had a post semester get-together and one of my professors who I had a crush on and who I knew like me too as he would question my friends about me, was in attendance. I spent the entire evening dancing and chatting with everyone else except him. I really hated myself when I got home. That's just how it is. Maybe you can get her to be a bit more comfortable by reaching out more to her

Alright that gives me a sense of relief thank you, what would you suggest because I don't want to scare her away.. I want her to be comfortable around me, and what do you think the very serious stares mean? and are most capricorn girls like that when they like someone?

Posted by champranger

Posted by FieryAries9108

Posted by CapGal
No FieryA, she doesn't hate you. Seems she's very attracted to you amd from my own experience, I tend to stay away from guys I'm attracted to cuz I get nervous around them, maybe stutter and make a fool of myself. So to ensure I don't make a fool of myself, I'll hang with just about anyone else, except that guy that's so irresistable.

I remember some time ago we had a post semester get-together and one of my professors who I had a crush on and who I knew like me too as he would question my friends about me, was in attendance. I spent the entire evening dancing and chatting with everyone else except him. I really hated myself when I got home. That's just how it is. Maybe you can get her to be a bit more comfortable by reaching out more to her

Alright that gives me a sense of relief thank you, what would you suggest because I don't want to scare her away.. I want her to be comfortable around me, and what do you think the very serious stares mean? and are most capricorn girls like that when they like someone?

She could just be observing you and your actions. Some Caps seems to really want to get to know people, especially if she's interested.

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Do you have any advice on how I should approach/ flirt with her? Also do you think she is interested in me?

LoL, boy that girl dont hate you. Im not sure what all is going through her head, but im also guilty of avoiding those im crazy about. My cancer cousin is crazy when she really likes a guy. She will literally push him away, so it can be a combination of her Cap sun and Cancer moon sending the weird signals.

I like champrangers advice on asking her opinion or asking her for help on something. Just make sure its not anything corny lol. Also like Capgal said we LOVE to laugh. I think that shes probably picking up some of your signals too. It doesnt sound like you are the most comfortable or sure around her either, which can make us even more nervous. Just get into yourself and dont put too much thought or energy in figuring her out. Approach her

..when you are comfortable in doing so.

I agree with the other girls. I get really nervous and clam up around men I really like. I'm all fine, silly and outgoing with them until I decide I like them, then something changes and I don't know how to act. I'm just too conscious of them. And, if I flirt or say something I think is a little forward, and, I don't feel like I get a positive response, then I really, really am uncomfortable and avoid them. (because I analyze it as they don't like me back). No telling how many men I have scared away because of acting like that.

Yes, as they said, keep her laughing and do unexpected things. When the timing is right and she is responding, say something like "you're fun, we oughta hang out more often" and see how she responds. Take it from there.

She is interested in you. She analysing you.

I just wanted to thank everyone for their advice, it has helped me from making a bad decision that I would regret, also thank you for taking the time to respond in such detail.

Keep us informed on how it went!

Hi everyone I need advice again, I have taken your advice and have pretty much been very polite and nice to her, and have been making an effort to talk to her every day and it's just so hard, I know you say that Capricorn start to pull away because they are scared to make a fool of themselves, but it's so hard for me, she has just been doing the same thing for a couple of days, she has been really ignoring me as of late like I don't exist it really kind of hurts, I have been so polite and nice/patient, I don't know if I can handle the games any more (I know Capricorn don't play games but I can tell she is testing me), she is still giving me the intense stare/ she always looks at me when I am not looking, but if i look at her she will either look away/ look at someone else, she has even ignored me when I tried to talk to her/ and tried to talk to someone else, are you sure she doesn't hate me? I have a feeling she wants me to say something/ not be so unsure about my feelings but I already said I would help her anytime she needed it, actually I did help her with something once and she was very grateful (she mentioned it many times and acted like it was a big deal, when for me it wasn't because I would do anything for the one I care about), also I said specifically that I like and care for her I remember saying that I thought she was an intelligent, witty, sophisticated woman with the beauty and sense of humor to match. I am a cancer ascendent and maybe this is what is causing the confusion, because it seems to me that I can't say or do anything to please her, How should I outwardly show my affection for her without coming on too strong? when she is giving me the super serious stare should I act like i don't notice or look over and give her a genuine smile? also when I look at her a lot she acts uncomfortable so should i try to break eye contact more/ smile more? the only time she really responds is if i compliment her, but if I try to flirt with her she acts like she wants to run but at one time she flirted so openly/obviously with me and that was when I was acting really aloof/before I started caring about her... I'm just very confused...

She needs to figure some things out more than you do. I would wash my hands and be done with it for a while. If its hard for you, or hurting you, then I don't think it's worth it. If it starts like this then you have to wonder if anything were to happen how would it possibly end? I don't like the whole ignoring, let me pretend I don't see you, thing. It's like she lured you and is now being silly, so until she figures whatever out then it's probably best you not worry too much about it. I doubt there is anything you can do to make her open up, and it's obvious she's not going to communicate much of anything, so ignore.

Maybe someone else will have some better advice lol, but I don't like the whole thing of flirting and luring someone in to act stupid. It's almost like she's toying with your feelings. Don't let her do that.

Shes not playing mind games shes nervous because shes got strong feelings. Just ask her on a date and take it slow. Capricorn is old fashioned so be a gentleman not some leg humper, just have open discussion frank straightforward no 'strategy'. Cappy is earth element so they check theyre on solid ground then proceed. So the seduction involves building firm ground, not display of fire, whirlwind romance or showing flexibility-water.
Im cappy woman and fire water and air look ace from a good earth position
But without a solid base in the beginning..fire looks like a reckless and shallow man..a watery man looks like a wimp/doormat and air looks chaotic and impractical.
But show earth first and fire looks like sincere enthusiasm based on a good understanding
water looks like sacrifice of love based on a deep bond and air looks like the beautiful sky that can only develop within a long term arrangement

So just say what your looking for in life, relationships find common ground then the stronger the ground found the more passion-fire, imagination going wild-air, and the more you will bend over backwards to be together-water

As for the update shes probably sick of nothing happening and has given up pretty much. As a lady she has hoped for a while but because your not making a move shes probably trying to move on mentally thinking nothings gonna happen. Cappy is old fashioned they hope the man will do what is traditional often ..well I used to - not till age 37 that I started flirting and gave up on waiting for a man to make the 1st move. Just ask her to go for coffee with you or hang out after work goto a movie anything and say its a DATE you are asking her on. If she looks like shes about to faint tell her that theres no rush to decide ..she might be terrified of going on a date with you cos her heart just jumped out of her chest so just say I wanna go for coffee sometime a date let me know if you want to sometime. Then run away and shit your pants pull yourself together and wait see her response

Yeah, just ask her out. THEN you'll know either way.

Thanks for everyone's advice, We both have a week off from work, I am going to decide to either move on or ask her out when we get back from that break, also i know for a fact that she is single. I really think that it's her capricorn sun and mercury with her cancer moon that is causing the confusion though.

My question is, did you notice her before she started laying on tables and putting herself out there to get your attention?

Posted by Chance11
some times a cap will come on strong and then wait to see how you'll react. a cap knows that time is on their side and has served them well in the past. unfortunately, she probably already knows the answer even though she hasn't shared it with you..it never hurts to ask so a respectful move on your part would be warranted if you think it's worth it imo. i think the aries/cap dynamic is always interesting due to quite different approaches. aries are people magnets so if this door closes, no biggie..good luck

By respectful move do you mean asking her out? and even though I am an Aries Sun and Moon I would say I act more like a water sign due to all the water in my chart, I am a watery Aries so to speak.

I just realized I never posted our charts so here they are:

Here is my chart:


Sun Aries 19??14'29 in house 10 direct
Moon Aries 0??55'34 in house 10 direct
Mercury Pisces 29??24'51 in house 10 direct
Venus Taurus 9??16'11 in house 11 direct
Mars Pisces 25??46'52 in house 10 direct
Jupiter Scorpio 12??19'52 in house 5 retrograde
Saturn Pisces 8??12'02 in house 9 direct
Uranus Capricorn 26??08'57 end of house 6 direct
Neptune Capricorn 23??16'43 in house 6 direct
Pluto Scorpio 27??39'37 in house 5 retrograde
True Node Scorpio 24??11'47 in house 5 retrograde
Ascendant Cancer 26??37'09



and here is her chart:


Sun Capricorn 23??59'27 in house 10 direct
Moon Cancer 19??39'50 in house 3 direct
Mercury Capricorn 25??15'19 in house 10 direct
Venus Sagittarius 7??08'24 in house 7 direct
Mars Aries 4??19'49 in house 12 direct
Jupiter Pisces 19??51'45 in house 11 direct
Saturn Sagittarius 16??51'09 in house 8 direct
Uranus Sagittarius 24??22'56 in house 8 direct
Neptune Capricorn 6??11'53 in house 9 direct
Pluto Scorpio 9??44'22 end of house 6 direct
True Node Aries 15??18'58 in house 12 retrograde
Ascendant Taurus 12??04'46

Posted by lnana04
My question is, did you notice her before she started laying on tables and putting herself out there to get your attention?

Well kind of, she did the laying on table thing only like a week and a half after we meant, I knew from the moment i meant her something was going to go down between us, but I didn't know what, The first day I met her she acted interested and after the first day she started flirting I was somewhat surprised by her flirting so I acted aloof and she flirted a lot while I acted aloof, I didn't act aloof on purpose I was just uncertain, and she stopped flirting obviously with me because I think she realized she overstepped a boundary/embarrassed herself and that is what caused her to withdraw, when she withdrew that's when I started to care because I realized she may have felt embarrassed by her actions and I didn't want her to be.

She stopped flirting because she may have thought you weren't interested. felt self-conscious about it. I think you are on target.

Posted by truecap
She stopped flirting because she may have thought you weren't interested. felt self-conscious about it. I think you are on target.

Yes but the truth was I was really interested I was just surprised/uncertain.

She's testing you & she is interested in you, however if your an Aries and she's a Capricorn......Good Luck

Posted by FieryAries9108

Posted by truecap
She stopped flirting because she may have thought you weren't interested. felt self-conscious about it. I think you are on target.

Yes but the truth was I was really interested I was just surprised/uncertain.

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Its that she THOUGHT that. Her insecurities....

Hello I have an important update, this week she started flirting with me again, it started on tuesday she was walking by me and complimented me on the cologne I was wearing, then the next day I was assisting a group of people with a project they were working on, someone was having trouble on an aspect of the project and I said I would assist them since I was also somewhat apart of this project any ways, she was impressed by what I was doing and she said something a long the lines of "you must be a pro at what you are working on, and I said I was not a pro but that I could handle it with no problem, and she then asked me some other questions and this is the first time she has talked to me in awhile. Then today is where the more important thing happened, I am not staying on the same job site forever, I am actually going to transfer jobs and buildings around late June, any ways yesterday she mentioned she needed help on something, she didn't ask me specifically she said it aloud to a group of people, so I overheard her saying that she needed help and well I decided to go out of my way to help her again, today I told her the information she needed to solve her problem (she was smiling as I said this because she realized I went out of my way to help her, and after said what I had to say she said " you are my go to guy" kind of saracastically , but then she said your so helpful I don't know what I am going to do without you, and then said don't get transferred, stay here and continue to help me next year". I was really confused after that... I don't know how serious she was being, do you think she was being serious or sarcastic? would a capricorn woman say something like this jokingly for the fun of it just to mess with someone's heart? I don't know what to believe, what do you guys think?

I personally think that's her way of saying she's going to miss you. I'm sure she wants you to look out for yourself and do what will be best for your career, so "stay here forever and help me" is her "I'm going to miss you when you leave." Just my opinion.

Posted by lnana04
I personally think that's her way of saying she's going to miss you. I'm sure she wants you to look out for yourself and do what will be best for your career, so "stay here forever and help me" is her "I'm going to miss you when you leave." Just my opinion.

hmm alright by her saying that she is actually confirming that she has feelings for me right? this is the first time she has actually said she cares for me.

Posted by FieryAries9108

Posted by lnana04
I personally think that's her way of saying she's going to miss you. I'm sure she wants you to look out for yourself and do what will be best for your career, so "stay here forever and help me" is her "I'm going to miss you when you leave." Just my opinion.

hmm alright by her saying that she is actually confirming that she has feelings for me right? this is the first time she has actually said she cares for me.

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She said she cared for you lol? See, I think you kind of go from one extreme to the next. You went from thinking she hates you to hearing her say she cares for you lol. Just relax, and talk to her and ask. That's the only way to know, cause I can't speak for her. I think she cares enough that you will be missed, and that's a good thing, but I can't say that mean she have these deep romantic feelings. We can kind of have layers of feelings, at least I do. One thing won't mean another.

Caps are pretty cool to talk to if you are being honest. Sit down and talk to her and see what's up.

Posted by lnana04

Posted by FieryAries9108

Posted by lnana04
I personally think that's her way of saying she's going to miss you. I'm sure she wants you to look out for yourself and do what will be best for your career, so "stay here forever and help me" is her "I'm going to miss you when you leave." Just my opinion.

hmm alright by her saying that she is actually confirming that she has feelings for me right? this is the first time she has actually said she cares for me.

She said she cared for you lol? See, I think you kind of go from one extreme to the next. You went from thinking she hates you to hearing her say she cares for you lol. Just relax, and talk to her and ask. That's the only way to know, cause I can't speak for her. I think she cares enough that you will be missed, and that's a good thing, but I can't say that mean she have these deep romantic feelings. We can kind of have layers of feelings, at least I do. One thing won't mean another.

Caps are pretty cool to talk to if you are being honest. Sit down and talk to her and see what's up.

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Alright I am going to talk to her, and I'm not saying she has deep romantic feelings for me, more that she likes me, but to me if someone say they don't want you to leave or go away, then that means that a person wants you to stay around, and that to me equates to deeper feelings.

Does anyone else have any advlice on my update? Maybe I should post a new thread for i

I think you guys working together is making her hot and cold. But I am sure if after you transfer and try to stay in touch, she may actually open up a bit more.

Posted by FoxGlove
Well, I am not a Capricorn woman, but I do have a lot of Cancer in my chart... Often, we feel very strongly but, like Capricorns, are nervous to make the first move. I think the thing to do now is DEFINITELY ASK HER OUT. That will show her that you like her as more than a work buddy, and should go along way to bring her out of her shell. Then, when she says yes (notice I didn't even bother to say "if") -- you will have a good idea of how she feels about you, too. Best of luck!

Thank you for you advice.

Posted by CapGal
She likes you but from what you have posted so far I dont really see anything to suggest she has deep feelings. I think a good test would be getting physically close to her and see how she responds. Does she lean in? Face you? Touch? Look you in the eyes and smile? Does she hold that look a little longer than usual? I dont mean in a sexual way, just a way that says I realy like being close to you. These are subtle clues for when someone is into you. And as a cappie, I respond in similar manner only if I really really like you

Well she has never purposely tried to invade my space herself she acts to nervous, but she seems to always want my attention/wants to be near/around me in general, she always looks at me from afar like she wants to be near me, also when she is near me she has turned her back and looked over her shoulder a lot, she stares a lot in general, she has only touched me once when we hugged, every time we have talked she about something serious she always looks me in the eyes and smiles, she smiles with her eyes a lot, but their have been times where she has ignored me and not even looked at me when we have talked, she has given me a lot of mixed signals with all the hot and cold.

Posted by NotaNewbie
I think you guys working together is making her hot and cold. But I am sure if after you transfer and try to stay in touch, she may actually open up a bit more.

You may be right due to use both being somewhat mixed with our feelings, it could give her more time to fully understand how she feels about me.