I think you sound a little too desperate( a little like my old self), as BOB stated, you should first love yourself, treat yourself like a queen and if you feel that something is not quite right, it may not be, trust your intuition. I had NOOOOOO self esteem-None, and in turn people who treated me as I felt about myself was attracted to me- that sucks. I begin to realize that and in turn treated myself like I wanted people , in general, to treat me. I did, and still do, things for and by myself. I know it's hard, but no one can make you feel good, especially if you don't feel good alone.
