Broken hearted Gem

Hey, this is Gemlicious... I am unsure what happened to my account! Anyway I received some pretty good responses from people letting me know how they dealt with a break up. The last response I received was pretty good and I was asking the poster " how they knew" since they kept asking me " again, ask me how I know". If you could respond again and tell me a little more about your experience with breaking up and moving on.

just keep urself busy. delete everything and anything that reminds you of your ex. put away any letters, photos etc things that remind you of your relationship and go out on the town meet new people, flirt ur ass off and you will slowly start to forget and the pain will ease gradually.

you just need to be strong and find the personal strengh within you. trust me in a few months time, a year, you'll look back and laugh at the situation. the truest saying of all is "time heals all wounds".

Dont force urself to get over it ASAP because life just doesnt work like that specially when you've TRULY loved someone and invested your all into them.

i had to let go of a pisces for me own well being and my sake and believe me it was fkn HARDDDD but im still here today, lived through it. he sucked me in with all the emotional blackmail but i got through it and moved on you can do the same.

this isnt a life and death situation. you WONT die from it.

I agree with what you said, but that statement about " in a few months time, in a year" almost made me pass out. It has NEVER taken me THAT long to get over someone and I am really hoping that it doesn't this time. I can't imagine even going through these emotions for another month, let alone a year. I realize I need to get out, be active, focus on me but it's kind of difficult to motivate myself to get excited about this stuff. I did agree to a blind date I was pushed by my friend to go on, she was a nice female, but I kept comparing her to my ex in some ways.

Sultanaa, I was sitting across the table from this blind date almost trying to force myself to be into her. I mean initially when I spoke to her on the phone I was really interested, then when I met her the comparing started. This is how my thinking went, " well she is a little taller than my ex, but I can work with that", " She has a nice smile and nice lips, but they aren't as full as ____", " If only she was a little darker, like my ex", " Wow, she eats so fast and even asked me did I want the rest of my food, ____ ate sooo slow (Taurus) and really savored the food", " She has a nice slim body, but ____ was nice, thick with some meat on her bones" LOL. This went on for a good part of the date and I felt bad.

I can actually say I am more "compatible" with this new female I just met. We have so much in common, she, dare I say it, COMMUNICATES, she is very knowledgeable, open, smells so wonderful and has great conversation. I am just going to take my time, focus on my wants and see what happens. I think I will end up having a good friendship with this person, but I am not ready for more. I just finally found the energy to actually WORK while I am at work and not daze off. Things are looking up

what is her sign inuvgem?

RNAP.. She is a Taurus

Well my EX is a Taurus and my new friend is a Gemini like me

Ah...a Taurus...does anyone EVER get over a Taurus?
j/k - if anyone can a Gem can

Respect to you for keeping your shit together at work. I think I was a basket case at work for a month when I thought it was history with my Gem.....I was so SURE I would get the sack!!

Good that you both communicate well (new Gem). I am sure you can keep it light and frothy for a while till you see where it is heading. One day at a time. keep smiling xReally

LOL.. Yeah, I am starting to wonder if anyone really ever gets over a Taurus... especially when you check out that board. I think they should be the #1 heartbreak sign of the Zodiac. Truthfully I think it is because ppl always want what is hard to attain and see Taurus ppl as a challenge. This was my first Taurus relationship and will be my last. All the insecurity she displayed and second guessing drove me nuts!1

But yeah, I was crazy at work for a week or so and even left work early.. just got up and left! When I love, FOR REAL, I put my all into it and I expect a return. Well, I did not get one in this situation, but life goes on and we grow from this type of mess.

Mr. Nice, I don't think you are being nasty or anything, your opinion is very much welcomed. However an opinion is only helpful when the person who is giving it knows the facts. First fact is, I wasn't dumped.. I walked away because I could not deal with the insecurity, second guessing, back & forth, doing all you could express a persons worth to you but it is never enough. The Dumpee is not the only person who gets hurt in a relationship. It hurts when you have to walk away from a relationship too. I made a list and the negative far outweighed the positive by a HUGE margin. I love her yes, but I love myself more and can't be in a unhealthy relationship. Sometimes it is best for all involved to walk away and if its meant we will find each other again. But yes, I do miss her, I still love her and wish she was with me right now. However, I was more hurt in the relationship than I am out of it. Besides that, I am old enough to know I can't transfer feelings from one person and put them on another. I went on a date, so what, it wasn't nothing serious and we both agreed we are just looking for casual friends. It is only natural to compare your ex to someone you go out with and that is what I did. I would never get seriously involved with anyone until I am completely ready and I KNOW when I am completely ready. LOL.. this is not my first heartbreak.. though I am only 29. But, Yeah you are right.. I have been keeping myself busy, focusing on me, my finances, career and what makes me genuinley happy.

I am awestruck that a Gemini wrote this:

" I could not deal with the insecurity, second guessing, back & forth, doing all you could express a persons worth to you but it is never enough"


I think you are doing the right thing Gemluscious - and sure, this girl might not be The One, but you obviously get along and it's always nice to have a friend and then you get to meet each others friends and how do you know one of those people won't rock your world? You just never know..keep rocking

LOL.. ReallyniceAries.. why are you so hard on us Gems lol?? What did we do? When a Gem falls in love, oh trust, we will do ANYTHING for that person and become vulberable in the worst way lol. My cheeks turn pink just thinking of some of the actions I did lol. So yeah RNAP.. answer the question.. did a Gem hurt you?

Wineaux.. I am definitely feeling your post on "control". Gems are usually so cool, calm, collected and in control of every situations ( or at least is able to give the impression of said lol). The only time I have no control is when I start caring deeply for someone. It is like I will become so vulnerable, mushy, dreamy, and in awe of all the feelings rushing through me. Love is the only emotion ever that can make me lose control.. not even anger, hurt or rage can. Matter of fact, I only feel those emotions when in love! smh... lawd help us Gems that fall in love!

"LOL.. ReallyniceAries.. why are you so hard on us Gems lol?? What did we do?"

A bad Gemini started it and no one (not even friends who have known us both for 10+ years can explain why he did it.) It just suited him at the time to shit all over me I guess. Bastard. Yes I know azshats come from all over the zodiac..

I do apologize for being so hard on the whole Gem family. Aries are actually harder on themselves than on anyone else, but I do admit to having little or no sympathy for Gems who have been/are hurting because of what happened to me. Because I was treated badly with no thought for my feelings I think I tend to return the favor a bit... although I am getting better, slowly, believe it or not!
I have a Gemmy crush thing happening at the moment and as he slowly (think glacier like pace) lets me in to his private hell I find I am becoming a more tender and sympathetic person.


"When a Gem falls in love, oh trust, we will do ANYTHING for that person and become vulberable in the worst way lol."
I hear you - we Rams are like that too. Maybe we are not so different after all!!

and I stand by my comment: this new girl might not be The One, but you obviously get along and it's always nice to have a friend and then you get to meet each others friends and how do you know one of those people won't rock your world? You just never know.. keep smiling - it's a new year and it is going to rock!!
xRNAP

Get to a point where you are just flat out bored with the situation. Bored of the thinking about it, bored of wondering, bored with the person.

It is like a moment when you don't judge yourself, judge that person or people around you, and you just have a serene drive to think about what is in front of you rather than the breakup.

It does come to you, and it is more than okay to get there, you aren't bailing on anyone, you are being healthy and that is a great thing.

Simple things like brushing your teeth sincerely or cleaning up a shelf cuz you just want to, are great little practices of faith in yourself and time to just be all sane about everything.

Be positive toward yourself, it might feel awkward at times, but it is the thing missing from the equation when you over-analyze the situation.

You can get to a point where you are bored, sincerely caring about what you want to care about hour to hour again, and you can still have the breakup things to deal with later, like who gets the tea pot.

Best of wishes, we can move beyond these broken hearts!

It is okay for us Aries to vent our emotions as misguided as you make us out to be.

We are honest, straightforward about love, and we more than tried to be all there is to ask for in a partner in this world.

If we don't get it expressed to that party, group, person or even star sign, then we are only failing the world by not being ourselves, or being too much of ourselves (the kind that let ourselves be taken for granted).

We come in peace!

OMG - Heroic have you got a webcam? Sorry about my shelf but am trifle busy at the moment. I shall go brush my teeth immediately though!

I keep being told on here how Gems love honesty....I guess we need to wrap it up in shiny paper and disguise it for them.
Having said that, "my??" Gem is starting to warm to honesty. At least when it comes to what I am going to do him - seems to like it🙂
or is that just a general guy thing—


**Have you stolen my call sign—

"We are Aries - we come in peace. Jump over - the grass is greener and the sex is better on our side"

Get to a point where you are just flat out bored with the situation. Bored of the thinking about it, bored of wondering, bored with the person.

It is like a moment when you don't judge yourself, judge that person or people around you, and you just have a serene drive to think about what is in front of you rather than the breakup.

^^^ I love what you said about Heroic_Guy and I can't wait until I get to that place. Each day I feel better and never thought I would be in this place where I can function. The first 2 weeks was hell, but I actually feel GOOD and in a good place. Yeah I still hurt if I dwell on everything, but life is for living and I am still alive.

RNAP LMBO.. you make me laugh when I read your comments lol. The comment about disguising honesty by wrapping it in shiny paper and presenting it to us was priceless because I agree with you. A few weeks after me & my ex broke up I started dating an ARIES girl and we are no longer dating. She actually contacted me today and we sent a few messages back and forth. The reason we didn't work out is because she asked way too much of me way too soon. We were only communicating for a week and already she wanted to " tell me" how she "felt" about me and " put it all out there". Well, I am not understanding how in one week she has all these deep emotions. I mean, she was very open & honest, but sometimes it is best to keep certain thoughts to yourself while you are feeling a person out. She would always ask am I dating anyone else or interested in anyone else.. despite the fact I told her she was the only one I was dealing with.. period. This came across as insecure, pushy and in a way I felt like she was trying to tie me down and we had just met.

I am sorry to hear a Gem broke your heart though... I know some Gems are very cold, calculating and only use people for until they have no more use of them or something " better" comes along. Sometimes I don't even think it is a conscious, planned out decision... rather something that just happens. You know, like a kid that sees a new toy and throws their other toy ( thats been with them forever) on the ground and grab the new one, playing with it, finding what makes it tick and so on.

Also, I think all guys like to hear what you are going to do for them.... even more so Gem guys since they are mental. At least I know I love to hear.. it definitely takes me places. warm places lol

Ha. Yes. Gemini guys are mental alright.

Sorry about your pushy Aries chick. that does sound insecure - you are much better off without that.
At least with another Gem you are both coming from the same kinda place.

I made the mistake of assuming that Gem2 was a cold calculating user because that's what Gem1 was.
Lucky I stuck with it and gave him another chance...I wonder how many great loves have fallen by the way because the lines of communication got all mixed up?

Here's to warm places babe🙂

I wonder how many great loves have fallen by the way because the lines of communication got all mixed up?

Way too many! I think great loves die more by lack of communication than infidelity.

Mr. Nice, puhlease get over yourself... why are you making this about you, your ego and your need to feel right? I never said I was sleeping or even going to sleep with anyone. YES I AM HEART BROKEN.. wouldn't be when a relationship ends. I wanted some constructive advice and pretty much have received what I needed. Next, maybe I do come across as a dude.. that might be my versatility, yeng yang, masculine/feminine qualities meshing together blah blah blah lol. Either way, nope.. I am a female who is only interested in relationships with females so that would make me a lesbian. Wow, feel like I am talking to my little nephew here... in slow motion! Yes, there are two sides to every story, but what does that have to do with anything? I can't think of one post on this board, relationship wise, where the OP posted there side and then the other person posted theirs lmbo.

I am really lost right now and have no idea what you are talking about with sleeping with someone and so on. Did I even mention that? You must be bored and have nothing better to do than to talk out of your a $ $ . Anyway...

lol so much for being "Mr Nice". Maybe he should change his name to "Mr Asshole". Would suit better 🙂