Ex Boyfriend Closure - Need some insight

Alright.

Well I am not sure how many of you know about my Scorpio but I came to the board two times. Once for a Virgo and the second for a Scorpio.

I've posted a myriad of different things on the forums and now I believe I am at my wits end. Of course I went onto the Scorpio forum and felt more like an outsider than anything over there, so tonight wasn't such a good night and here I am posting to my fellow Gem's.

Since you know how we do things I am going to get to the point and skip the bullshit sum it up without a long winded explanation.

Been seeing a guy on and off for about 2 years. It's been rocky, but I cared a lot about him. A few months ago we had a terrible falling out due to some he/she said and at this time we weren't together, more over taking a break and he told me a few things that were extremely hurtful, and left. Three months later he shows up. I didn't contact him once. Nothing. Zero. And that is very rare for me. It's not that I didn't think about him because I did, a lot more than I should honestly. A few days ago I get an email saying "hi" just that, nothing more. Now remember I didn't talk to him first, he came to me. I answered back with one word like he did. Skip forward we finally get into contact and here he comes telling me he has a new girlfriend. Really? Ok. Why would anyone even do that. What do you want? Asking him that question doesn't get me anywhere. He tells me "I just wanted answers", more like a cop out.

Not really sure where to go now. I tried asking this on the Scorpio forum but well I don't think some people like us over there.

So tonight, we get into an argument, well ok not really, I lose my shit because he starts talking about his new gf. I DONT CARE! My god. Why are you even here in my life? It's like is he trying to hurt me? I told him to just take me off his contact list, don't contact me, etc., really frazzled. He doesn't do it. Later he asks "Are you not going to talk to me?" WTF! I told him I was super upset with him.

You guys I don't know what is going on with this guy but it's like he wants me in his life but he doesn't. Claims "Not here to rekindle the fire", then WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE.

Was really upset tonight spent most of my night bummed out and keeping my silence (which as you fellow Gem's know that is when something is really wrong).

Suggestions? Comments? Lend a helping hand to a Gem, having a tough time.

Hoovering, it's called hoovering, that's what toxic/immature/unevolved men do, they hoover you back in for an ego fix and if you respond he figures you're still in love after all the bullshit he's done to you, once you answer he shifts into being toxic again. No one can make you do anything, clearly not talking to him is not an option for you but if you're smart you make this the last time you allow yourself to be hoovered in only to have him wipe his feet on your face by telling you something hurtful just so you will never get over him and be connected to him through pain--drama--frustration.

Scorp males the ones that are not quite evolved mentally/emotionally thrive off of control, controlling the people close to them, how they do that depends on the person.

Delete him and move on and if you can't do that then stop complaining about his behavior because realistically he can't do what he's doing to you IF YOU DON'T SHOW UP for it. If you RESPOND in anger, allow him to control your feelings, control your happiness by keeping you in a bummed out state of mind then he's running YOU, he's controlling YOU, he can't do that if you're not showing up for that.

Try not allowing him to see you being angry, try to CONTROL YOURSELF around him, don't give him the control, don't allow him to see you losing your cool, if he bring you bad news, SMILE, laugh and tell him how great it is and then IGNORE HIM for a really long time, you've taught him he can control you and your happiness by YOU SHOWING up for it.

You were gone for 3 months well get gone again, stay gone for another 3 months to help you emotionally heal/get over him and to help him learn that he can't play with you in the way he's playing with you mentally and emotionally and still have you in his life.

He is trying to get a reaction out of u, jealousy etc, just to see how u really feel about him. Im sure he took the 'losing your shit' as a sign of feelings. He is now satisfied wherever he is cause he now knows u still have feelings- according to him. Scorps do just about anything to get u to feel, show that u feel or to ensure themselves of your feelings. Its a constant thing with them and i dont think they get how annoying and exhausting their little stupid tests are. Dont give him reaction, he expects it- play pokerface or just send him packing, lol. Who needs all that?

Morning everyone.

Thank you for all posting some of my favorite people in here right now. PM nice to meet you (hug). Again thank you all for the honest insight.

Normally I don't like to bear it all on the boards but I think Gem's do it when we are really on our last leg. Scorpio knows I am not usually obtainable in the way that he likes (emotionally) but I believe everyone here is spot on. Had to drag myself out of bed this morning literally emotionally drained. I get that we might not be the most outward emotional people but we still hurt like everyone else, and when we do it's pretty intense. For these reasons we avoid it. It's almost like the water signs act like a catalyst to the thing they dislike the most. Us hiding our feelings and trying to avoid it like the plague.

Anyways, thanks everyone. Going to pick up the pieces and walk for good. I do care about him, but I would prefer someone who didn't give me tests all the time just to see where I stand. Why can't you just ask me? (Sighs)

Instead of spending my time being upset I could be using it to actually talk to someone else who makes me laugh, etc.

Yeah totally don't like us! LOL! Well they seem to like you, you ass kisser 😄

You know I saw your message you originally posted! LOL! Then you took it down um hum!

Well so last night was the first time I didn't sign into anything, shut my phone off, and spent some me time which is sleeping. I've been thinking about him, yes of course but I guess it's really bad when a Gemini becomes totally unreachable. I only do this when the chips are down. Hiding out. *Channels my bff and my sister's moves, they are both Cancers* Hides...LOL!

I have Venus/Mars in Taurus like to get comfy and just hide out for a while.

Update:

My dear Gem's, I did it. I cut the ties for good. I told him how I felt (which was really hard for me because I don't like talking about emotions a lot) and said my piece and left. Removed him from everything, pictures were put away, phone number was removed, emails, everything. He seemed to be just fine with it too. Get home and he texts me "I don't get why you're so upset" really? Right now I can't even tell if this was all a test and it ended up backfiring on him because I walked away. Scorpio's are notorious for testing people and something is extremely fishy. He's the one who told me he had a girlfriend first I never, ever brought up anything about me dating. Then he comes back and says "Well it seems you were ready to move on" WTF! I didn't even say that.

Anyways, it's a total mess. Cleaned that shit up and put it away. Who tells someone that they really cared about "Just try not to think about it" about them telling you hey I've moved on completely in less than 3 months. Yeah I can't really tell if it's a test because he's so not like that.

When I told him everything he was like "Ok fair enough" really? WTF. Ok. Done. I am going to be angry for a while. Still don't understand why he came back in the first place.