Gemini Jealousy?

Gem and I (female Sag) have a 10 year history of on and off.... more off than on, but none the less. We have a kid together who I raised on my own while he was in the military (he helped with child support and insurance and saw her once or so a year) Anyway, I had started dating someone last spring and he was just up and stopped talking to me for no reason once the relationship was official and cited not wanting our kid around another guy as the reason. I could understand that. I wound up leaving that guy and ended up back with Gem.

My daughter and I wound up moving near him for me to finish school. Things were not good. He spent most of his time telling me how much he wished I was gone "sarcastically" and he just couldn't ever say anything nice. We moved into our place and he and I ended things. He recently started dating and Aries who is much younger than him. We agreed to not introduce our child to significant others unless it is serious, so she isn't involved. So, they've been dating awhile and I struggled with that because my daughter and I are only here for a short time and we are moving again in the summer and this is his only time to be an every day parent... But I'm working on that.

However, today he has her for the evening and it has been a long time since that happened so I let him know that I have plans. He pushed about what my "plans" were and I tried to avoid the truth of it but he kept pushing so I told him that I had a date. He acted totally cool about it but I could tell he wasn't and then today, the day of, he decides he is going to change plans with our daughter. I told him that it was fine but I'm still not going to be home until 830 tonight. He was LIVID and he is just being nasty. Trying to tell me that I'm selfish and I'm only not being a bitch because I'm getting my way (which is for him to spend time with his kid). I didn't bother to tell him that my date was cancelled and that I'm just taking myself to the movies...

But he keeps trying to tell everyone that he wouldn't care if I dated someone and that he just doesn't want our kid involved.... Which, she won't be... So can someone shed some light on this for me?

Posted by herlimbicmind
Gem and I (female Sag) have a 10 year history of on and off.... more off than on, but none the less. We have a kid together who I raised on my own while he was in the military (he helped with child support and insurance and saw her once or so a year) Anyway, I had started dating someone last spring and he was just up and stopped talking to me for no reason once the relationship was official and cited not wanting our kid around another guy as the reason. I could understand that. I wound up leaving that guy and ended up back with Gem.

My daughter and I wound up moving near him for me to finish school. Things were not good. He spent most of his time telling me how much he wished I was gone "sarcastically" and he just couldn't ever say anything nice. We moved into our place and he and I ended things. He recently started dating and Aries who is much younger than him. We agreed to not introduce our child to significant others unless it is serious, so she isn't involved. So, they've been dating awhile and I struggled with that because my daughter and I are only here for a short time and we are moving again in the summer and this is his only time to be an every day parent... But I'm working on that.

However, today he has her for the evening and it has been a long time since that happened so I let him know that I have plans. He pushed about what my "plans" were and I tried to avoid the truth of it but he kept pushing so I told him that I had a date. He acted totally cool about it but I could tell he wasn't and then today, the day of, he decides he is going to change plans with our daughter. I told him that it was fine but I'm still not going to be home until 830 tonight. He was LIVID and he is just being nasty. Trying to tell me that I'm selfish and I'm only not being a bitch because I'm getting my way (which is for him to spend time with his kid). I didn't bother to tell him that my date was cancelled and that I'm just taking myself to the movies...

But he keeps trying to tell everyone that he wouldn't care if I dated someone and that he just doesn't want our kid involved.... Which, she won't be... So can someone shed some light on this for me?

What's his Moon, Venus and Mars?

It seems he can't stand the thought of you moving on but he can. That's confusing!! I could understand if you were the reason you two weren't together but he didn't want that, so why does it bother him?

His moon is Virgo, Rising is Gemini, Venus is Cancer, Mars is Cap...
He was nasty last night. He initially gave me a difficult time about drop off time and refused to give me a time so I told him if he wasn't there by a specific time that he could pick her up at the neighbors next door and that I wasn't playing games. He ended up showing up at the correct time and I went about my merry way. He texted me an hour and half later to say that our daughter had an accident and needed new pants, I suggested going to the local department store and that I'd reimburse him. He called me, I answered and spoke with our daughter... turns out what they had planned to do didn't pan out and she was upset, I offered him a suggestion to take her to a movie, he told me to go fuck myself and hung up on me.... He then messaged me a few more times and i answered him, trying to stay upbeat and he was rude and just... nasty.

It is so bizarre to me. They are supposed to do a daddy/daughter dance event tonight, but he's refusing to take her to dinner (so I will) and is leaving the dance early. But he is being so ridiculous.

I told him jealousy doesn't suit him and he freaked out and said that it wasn't jealousy but I could thing what I want.

We've had our ups and downs and fought last week about him not being around for our daughter's stuff, but other than that, things have been good. I'm just so at a loss.

I'd like to say it isn't jealousy, but he does this EVERY TIME I see someone (which doesn't happen frequently) this was my first "date" in a year...

Seriously though. How can this not be seen as jealousy?

You've already answered you own question.

From my perspective as a gemini sun and virgo moon because even when i'm not with an ex anymore i still feel like i own them it's annoying but that could be how he feels like he owns you and especially having a child together i could only imagine that intensifying maybe he hopes something happens and you get back together.. is he with anyone?

All Geminis are jealous, and not just of exes or partners ... they're jealous of friends, co-workers, neighbors, siblings, etc.

That's a given that everyone should realize by now ... so, I'm not even sure why you come to make a big deal out of something we all know. It was your job to work around that for yourself and your daughter.

it's like bitching because a Virgo isn't emoting.


Anyway, that point was present long before you ever met him, and you should have been aware of it before you got serious with him ... but, that's not even what got my attention here.

What has my eyebrows raised are these words of yours: "He texted me an hour and half later to say that our daughter had an accident and needed new pants, I suggested going to the local department store and that I'd reimburse him"

Why does a father have to call someone else when it comes to dealing with their own children?
Is he so helpless that he cannot even manage to realize what he has to do?
If he isn't capable of realizing what he has to do when his child wets themselves, then he shouldn't have visitation.
it means he isn't capable of having good enough judgment to know what to do to take care of his child, in that he has to be told how to rectify.

But, that's not even the worse part ..... he can't even pay for pants, in where you have to tell him you'll reimburse him.

If he cannot pay for a pair of pants for his child ..... then you should be the good mother you think you are and move along.

He's a loser as a father in this case .... so you should do the right thing and remove her from his presence, completely ... and only allow him to see her in the future when he has 10.00 in his pocket to buy his own fucking child a pair of pants.

hes a jelly bean for sureeeee

Posted by P-Angel

All Geminis are jealous, and not just of exes or partners ... they're jealous of friends, co-workers, neighbors, siblings, etc.

That's a given that everyone should realize by now ... so, I'm not even sure why you come to make a big deal out of something we all know. It was your job to work around that for yourself and your daughter.

it's like bitching because a Virgo isn't emoting.


Anyway, that point was present long before you ever met him, and you should have been aware of it before you got serious with him ... but, that's not even what got my attention here.

What has my eyebrows raised are these words of yours: "He texted me an hour and half later to say that our daughter had an accident and needed new pants, I suggested going to the local department store and that I'd reimburse him"

Why does a father have to call someone else when it comes to dealing with their own children?
Is he so helpless that he cannot even manage to realize what he has to do?
If he isn't capable of realizing what he has to do when his child wets themselves, then he shouldn't have visitation.
it means he isn't capable of having good enough judgment to know what to do to take care of his child, in that he has to be told how to rectify.

But, that's not even the worse part ..... he can't even pay for pants, in where you have to tell him you'll reimburse him.

If he cannot pay for a pair of pants for his child ..... then you should be the good mother you think you are and move along.

He's a loser as a father in this case .... so you should do the right thing and remove her from his presence, completely ... and only allow him to see her in the future when he has 10.00 in his pocket to buy his own fucking child a pair of pants.

Go change your diaper. Your a cranky one.

Posted by Jenna77

Posted by Pandala
Seriously though. How can this not be seen as jealousy?

You've already answered you own question.

A rather peculiar way to show jealousy...at the same time he dates other women, he doesn't want her to go out with other men. Double standards.

click to expand

Yes. Welcome to the mind of a selfish asshole.

I wouldn't say I get jealous of every one around me as P-Angel suggests. But I think it's funny how she has over exaggerated that as a proven fact. 🙂 By Western standards, I am a Gem SUN and I get....I would say sad is the word, when I think the guy I'm into likes someone else. I really do just get super bummed. But at the same time, how can you really know the situation that OP is discussing here? She's had an on/off relation with this man for years. We don't know their relationship or why it's tumultuous, anyways. You definitely can't throw all of the blame on him just because she is typing the story. The man's in the military, he's got money. Duh. They have a beautiful child together. They still see each other. She moved nearer to him. It's obvious there are emotional ties and dependency there.

OP, if you want to keep him in your child's life, if he is a good father and you know it, give him his right as father. Keep your personal life to yourself and truly break it off with him. Giving him tidbits of info and remaining somewhat dependent on the stability confuses him! If there is anything true here its that no person likes being in a gray relationship where they don't know what to think! End it or keep it.