hurt by an aqua male, not sure how to process emotions

i was seeing/good friends with an aqua guy for about a year and a half (im libra) and he hasn't been with anyone during this time and has heavily hinted and even said he liked me, sometimes he leaves for days/weeks/months but i got used to that, we've never really had the dating talk bc its mainly long distance, but he recently texted me but i was asleep and i replied in the morning and he said he was drunk and wanted to talk to me, then he tells me he got laid by some girl? i dont get why he said that, i said "nice, happy for you" and ignored his texts and left him on read after that. im just really hurt and shocked, i know we're not dating but i didn't think he was that type and i dont get how he could say it to me like that and not think it would affect me? im not used to being hurt by a boy so i have no idea how to handle my emotions

i'm sorry this happened to you.

this guy sounds like he is young, and stupid, and has no insight.

but i'm going to tell you the harsh truth.

you allowed yourself to get hurt. you allowed a guy who is not near you, who you don't really know, who never really showed you any tangible interest, loyalty, value to get you invested. you got caught up in thinking things were one way, with no real reason to. he gave you none of the signs that showed he was worthy of your romantic feelings.

the lesson? only believe it when you see it. people can talk and it is just that - talk. when it is front of you and has passed the sniff test, then and only then, proceed with caution. before that? don't give it too much value.

don't feel too bad about this. he has given you a fabulous lesson. appreciate it. be happy. you've been given a gift. it's hurts now, but it will save you pain in the future when you remember the sting of this and vow never to get caught up prematurely again.

Posted by jeane
i'm sorry this happened to you.

this guy sounds like he is young, and stupid, and has no insight.

but i'm going to tell you the harsh truth.

you allowed yourself to get hurt. you allowed a guy who is not near you, who you don't really know, who never really showed you any tangible interest, loyalty, value to get you invested. you got caught up in thinking things were one way, with no real reason to. he gave you none of the signs that showed he was worthy of your romantic feelings.

the lesson? only believe it when you see it. people can talk and it is just that - talk. when it is front of you and has passed the sniff test, then and only then, proceed with caution. before that? don't give it too much value.

don't feel too bad about this. he has given you a fabulous lesson. appreciate it. be happy. you've been given a gift. it's hurts now, but it will save you pain in the future when you remember the sting of this and vow never to get caught up prematurely again.

Yesssssss! I was thinking something similar and then I read your comment.

OP listen to this good advice.

Oh my god, I had a similar situation with Aqua male, I'm also libra.

Basically we have been talking online for 4 months. Living in different countries but very close,. We got close and intimate. Talked almost every day. We planned everything out to see each other this July. FOUR days before our meeting he tells me he hooked up with some girl and that he can't see me, actually he wouldn't even talk to me, I finally reached for him after few days of not talking, he was like 'I have i girlfriend for almost a week, I'm busy,'. That's it, bye.

Wow, so similar, its weird.

Now, I can't tell you how to handle this, we're all different, and you know him for a year, you really care for him..However you need to push yourself to forget and move on, he's not a good partner.

In conclusion Aqua males are insensitive and selfish lol. I don't want to get involved with them.

Posted by venusianone
Oh my god, I had a similar situation with Aqua male, I'm also libra.

Basically we have been talking online for 4 months. Living in different countries but very close,. We got close and intimate. Talked almost every day. We planned everything out to see each other this July. FOUR days before our meeting he tells me he hooked up with some girl and that he can't see me, actually he wouldn't even talk to me, I finally reached for him after few days of not talking, he was like 'I have i girlfriend for almost a week, I'm busy,'. That's it, bye.

Wow, so similar, its weird.

Now, I can't tell you how to handle this, we're all different, and you know him for a year, you really care for him..However you need to push yourself to forget and move on, he's not a good partner.

In conclusion Aqua males are insensitive and selfish lol. I don't want to get involved with them.

wow im glad you can relate haha, they are so confusing i just dont get how they dont have any emotions? and how he told me so calmly like as if he thought it wouldn't affect me at all

Yes, without even apoloziging or anything, it's so airy like. It must be due to he's an air sign, wishy-washy, not involved with emotions much or lacks empathy 😢

Posted by venusianone
Yes, without even apoloziging or anything, it's so airy like. It must be due to he's an air sign, wishy-washy, not involved with emotions much or lacks empathy 😢

you're not helping her by blaming him. to blame him is to ignore what she could have done differently and the role she played in this outcome.

the simple truth sounds like he was/is not on the same page as her. he said never said that he was. she assumed that since she felt one way, he must as well when he gave her no indication to believe so.

It's not like he went- hey we're not on the same page, I'm not in for this, I'M SORRY. That would be okay and mature.

Of couse I'm gonna blame him after he outta nowhere tells her he got laid, to hurt her, or for the reaction. So childish and immature. Tells you things about him.

Posted by venusianone
It's not like he went- hey we're not on the same page, I'm not in for this, I'M SORRY. That would be okay and mature.

Of couse I'm gonna blame him after he outta nowhere tells her he got laid, to hurt her, or for the reaction. So childish and immature. Tells you things about him.

he didn't say that because they didn't talk about it. he didn't bring it up, neither did she. it was a long distance conversation that he would disappear from for days/weeks/months(!) so in a way, he really did say it. she just didn't take any notice.

you don't know what his motivation was. that's assumption on your part.

Posted by venusianone
It's not like he went- hey we're not on the same page, I'm not in for this, I'M SORRY. That would be okay and mature.

Of couse I'm gonna blame him after he outta nowhere tells her he got laid, to hurt her, or for the reaction. So childish and immature. Tells you things about him.

thank you for understanding 🙂