My TF has scarred me sexually.. Sex isn't the same

TF= twin flame normally.

not sure with this one.

Pretty sure she means twin flame.

OP, expectations and comparing people will only harm you. I think you need to have some alone time to work on yourself. And stop thinking of your guys in terms of 'twin flame' or 'not twin flame'. They're just people. Thinking you're meant to be with someone or thinking someone is literally your one and only 'other half' won't help you move forward in this situation. Right now you should focus on healing. Once you do that, you'll eventually be able to stop comparing all your sexual experiences to what you experienced with that one guy. And, if you are pregnant, then your romantic life can wait. You won't only be living for yourself anymore.

Posted by flowingwater

Posted by saweetz1988
I just wanna be a nun and not have sex with anyone all together.... finally gave another a man a chance last night since he's so willing to be part of my life and even be there for the preggy I have holding made between me and my TF... Yet the kisses were so passionless and I kept trying and trying... I hate him for scaring my life sexually this way..... and it's the same for him as he said but since the last fight I don't think we will be together that way again.... I'm even more lost.... Do I keep being with someone even thought the chemistry of deep passion isn't there?? Am I just addicted to the passion— I hate t so much... How many times have I cried after kissing somebody...... He has ruined my ability to enjoy sex with others all together ..... I honestly don't know what to do....

Wait your pregnant and having sex with someone else??

click to expand

It too me a while to make that decision.. but most likely this will be the last.. the pain afterwards isn't worth it

Posted by Scenic
Pretty sure she means twin flame.

OP, expectations and comparing people will only harm you. I think you need to have some alone time to work on yourself. And stop thinking of your guys in terms of 'twin flame' or 'not twin flame'. They're just people. Thinking you're meant to be with someone or thinking someone is literally your one and only 'other half' won't help you move forward in this situation. Right now you should focus on healing. Once you do that, you'll eventually be able to stop comparing all your sexual experiences to what you experienced with that one guy. And, if you are pregnant, then your romantic life can wait. You won't only be living for yourself anymore.

Thank u. Your words r true.. I need to be alone and heal on myself... I was kind of following my brain as he did offer to be part of the baby's life as I figure my baby needs a father figure since his real father is still on a running stage... but it's too early to judge if that's true completely so patient and more waiting game seems like it is needed.... he may satisfy me mentally, and perfect by the book but my body has been jinxed to that one person and it hurts more to be with someone else the same way... u r right this is my healing time... I will somehow explain it to this guy.....

and yes I strongly believe this man who jinxed my body is my twin flame. It's a blessing and a curse.

Your baby doesn't NEED a father, especially just any guy who says he's willing to do so. The question you should be asking yourself is: "Can I be happy with another man right now?"
If you're not happy, that will likely affect how you treat the kid. Another question is: "does the guy hold values that I want my child to learn?" That's more for the future, when you potentially find someone who can make you say 'yes' to both of those. And, it isn't a race of time. The kid can do fine without a father figure in their life (although, yes, kids do do better with two attentive,loving parents. But, worse with someone who's not good for them). You're going to have your hand full for a while after the kid is born. I imagine you won't have much time or emotional energy to think about dating, anyway.
Another good question to think about is: What if you have found a guy who you have brought in to your child's life and then the dad shows up wanting to be apart of the family and have a relationship with you again?
If you're hasty about bringing a guy in as a father and then are going to easily strip your kid of a relationship with him if the dad comes back, then that isn't good! Which is why I personally think you should have fully moved on from him before you start something with another guy.

Of course, this is all my opinion. I don't want to sound like I'm trying to push these things on you. It's up to you to decide how things will go and what you want to do.

Posted by Scenic
Your baby doesn't NEED a father, especially just any guy who says he's willing to do so. The question you should be asking yourself is: "Can I be happy with another man right now?"
If you're not happy, that will likely affect how you treat the kid. Another question is: "does the guy hold values that I want my child to learn?" That's more for the future, when you potentially find someone who can make you say 'yes' to both of those. And, it isn't a race of time. The kid can do fine without a father figure in their life (although, yes, kids do do better with two attentive,loving parents. But, worse with someone who's not good for them). You're going to have your hand full for a while after the kid is born. I imagine you won't have much time or emotional energy to think about dating, anyway.
Another good question to think about is: What if you have found a guy who you have brought in to your child's life and then the dad shows up wanting to be apart of the family and have a relationship with you again?
If you're hasty about bringing a guy in as a father and then are going to easily strip your kid of a relationship with him if the dad comes back, then that isn't good! Which is why I personally think you should have fully moved on from him before you start something with another guy.

Of course, this is all my opinion. I don't want to sound like I'm trying to push these things on you. It's up to you to decide how things will go and what you want to do.

Thank you so much. Your words have been very helpful and throughly expressed. I have always been firmed and fine with the thought of being a single parent. I always have been.. The new guy truly does morals and other qualities I do and would like to have my child looking up to... hence why I did give him a chance and us a chance.... I truly did like him and I enjoy spending time with him.. However Physically and sexually... The real dad has almost scarred me for life.. I can not express them in words or would any one ever understand me. Sex isn't the same with anyone else anymore even the kisses... and that also applies to him as well.... now, me and him tried to work it out .. Becusse we r so passionate and we r very deep and intense. The fights(not in person) gets extreme (mainly me) that I push him away and it's the cycle repeating itself... We can't just be normal friends. im hoping we can and I'm hoping we can be back together and work it out so we can be both loving parents but he isn't ready at all.. Mentally he isn't... So you are right, my baby doesn't need a father... I will be the baby's everything and when that day comes I trul truly move on from him ( if years pass and he still doesn't come back) then I will see what happens then... at the end of the day, my child wants me to be happy and if being physically with another guy now is giving me more stress

Then I'm sure it's better off I'm alone and do my own healing without anyone..... i think its for the best for now... Thank you

If you think it will help, there is always counseling available for family and relationships. It would likely help you overcome a lot more than digesting whatever is said here would.

Good luck to you and remember that there's always support out there.

Posted by Scenic
If you think it will help, there is always counseling available for family and relationships. It would likely help you overcome a lot more than digesting whatever is said here would.

Good luck to you and remember that there's always support out there.

Thank you for ur kind words and understanding. I did try counselling and will go back. She said not to move on really and just patient and wait for him . He believes if the connection is strong he will come back.. lol so I didn't know whether to go back to her or not... Funny indeed.

Posted by queencancer
Ahhh...the TF business is a very expensive business.

T-T if I can go back time secretly I wish we never met.'it's so intense

What are you guy's sun signs?

Posted by Magenta_Azure
What are you guy's sun signs?

I have Taurus sun and he has sag sun. I have Venus in gem and he has Venus in Scorpio.

Posted by queencancer

Posted by saweetz1988

Posted by queencancer
Ahhh...the TF business is a very expensive business.

T-T if I can go back time secretly I wish we never met.'it's so intense

Awww don't feel sad or angry please.

Yes, I certainly feel you on that one. But the real question is: What is the lesson in all of this? What did I gain? What did I lose? And if your ride was as deep and complicated as mine was with my TF, then you'll realize youve gained a hell of a lot more than how much youve lost. I actually don't even view what I lost as a loss because it was worth every bump, tumble and swerve. The lessons that type of intensity brings is of a type that which changes lives. It makes warriors. It magnifies your purpose and or reason why. I know it's hard, but just be thankful you had the opportunity to taste such an Enlightenment. Everyone doesn't get to experience this lifetime. It's a delicacy. Take what you learned from it and apply it to your purpose and you will move mountains. But you have to believe in the majik first. 😉

Good luck to you sweetheart.

click to expand

Aww thank tou.. Yes I feel you totally.. There are times when I feel really really cherished with what I have experienced with him. That deep soul make loving experience. And I walk around in bubbles wondering how many people will experience that— And I am left feeling lucky.. Hence why I decided to fall pregnant Coz i wanted the baby to be born out of that experience.... Now I'm kind of left with all the disappointments that come with sex with another..... I will just be a nun or something lol.. The pain after sex with another isn't worth it at all.

Posted by Vixen2
using sex for a bandaid doesn't work for alot of people. just don't do it if you don't have the chemistry you crave...you'll regret everytime #grabandgo

Yay I did learn that the hard way... So if I want to achieve that level of chemistry it's only from him... So do I just wait a life time? lol