One day as the opposite gender - what do you do?

Posted by EyesOfFire
I would avoid getting laid.

Kinda sounds like the people in your life already 😛

please for once lets not hear all the women hear say "play around with it" or "do the helicopter" or "stick it things" or "wank all day" or "slap it" or "piss on all the public toilets seats" or "slowly but seductively flop it out in front of dog" or "aggressively thrust backwards and forwards creating a nice sounding slapping noise" or "tuck it in and pretend you have a fadge" or "tuck the testicles in see if you can the testicles in the mirror" Or refer to it as "it" okay. It may not be as technologically advanced as the female genitalia, but sure deserves more respect than "it".

Posted by TasteOfChaosss

Posted by AA
please for once lets not hear all the women hear say "play around with it" or "do the helicopter" or "stick it things" or "wank all day" or "slap it" or "piss on all the public toilets seats" or "slowly but seductively flop it out in front of dog" or "aggressively thrust backwards and forwards creating a nice sounding slapping noise" or "tuck it in and pretend you have a fadge" or "tuck the testicles in see if you can the testicles in the mirror" Or refer to it as "it" okay. It may not be as technologically advanced as the female genitalia, but sure deserves more respect than "it".

OK FINE

Id play around with my large throbbing cock and do the helicopter. Id stick my dick in all the vaginas and beat it until its dry. Then I would write my name in the snow reading "I have a giant cock"

Id shave my ball sack and feed my large appendage to all the bitchez.

Better?

click to expand

lol


So you'd be the very thing all women detest? A dirty cheating man-whore?


And writing in the snow with an erect penis would be painful. And probably impossible. When i went skiing in Poland i literally couldn't see my willy, it shrivelled up to exponentially small dimensions...

I mean i had to rub it like .. you know? A fanny, so it would come out of it's hiding place in order to pee

Posted by AA
please for once lets not hear all the women hear say "play around with it" or "do the helicopter" or "stick it things" or "wank all day" or "slap it" or "piss on all the public toilets seats" or "slowly but seductively flop it out in front of dog" or "aggressively thrust backwards and forwards creating a nice sounding slapping noise" or "tuck it in and pretend you have a fadge" or "tuck the testicles in see if you can the testicles in the mirror" Or refer to it as "it" okay. It may not be as technologically advanced as the female genitalia, but sure deserves more respect than "it".

TECHNOLOGICALLY ADVANCED?! What - do they make iVaginas nowadays?

You want me to be more creative with male genitalia? That's basically what you're saying.

I will say, once I pretended 'Dr.' (the name for a certain past lover's genitalia) was a mustache. It was lulz and all for a moment but then we got back to work. I think that's a 6/10 on the shlong creativity meter.

Should I name my hypothetical manly bits? 😛

Posted by TasteOfChaosss

Posted by AA
please for once lets not hear all the women hear say "play around with it" or "do the helicopter" or "stick it things" or "wank all day" or "slap it" or "piss on all the public toilets seats" or "slowly but seductively flop it out in front of dog" or "aggressively thrust backwards and forwards creating a nice sounding slapping noise" or "tuck it in and pretend you have a fadge" or "tuck the testicles in see if you can the testicles in the mirror" Or refer to it as "it" okay. It may not be as technologically advanced as the female genitalia, but sure deserves more respect than "it".

Then I would write my name in the snow reading "I have a giant cock"

click to expand

This, this is magical.

I remember back when i was like 14 years old hanging out with my friends and that question came up, talking about what id do if i were a woman and i said i would never let any dude put a dick inside me.
My friends all collectively said, Who are you kidding? Youd be the school slut.

that hurt my feelings. lol.

Posted by sheathedclaws

Hahaha. This is great.
Cause, Im a huge Jets fan so I remember that night when we beat the Patriots and no one believed the mighty Pats could lose, especially to us. And Scott does that interview. hahahha.

I was so amped that night i think i was leaking testosterone all over the house. Bart's job was to go head to head with the 300 behemoths so the other linebackers can make the tackles. Bart is a MAN.

Too bad he wont be back with the team this year. Anyways...i know that wasnt the
point of your thread just NEVER expected to see that clip on here, well not posted by any emale except, USCTAURUSGIRL who just kicks ass and some dude will be a lucky SOB!

Oh and for the record....i almost puked when i heard we signed Tim Tebow.
What a stupid organization i root for. But thats for another forum entirely.

~schlong creativity club~



I'm way too giddy over these answers.

Posted by wgamador2

Posted by sheathedclaws

Hahaha. This is great.
Cause, Im a huge Jets fan so I remember that night when we beat the Patriots and no one believed the mighty Pats could lose, especially to us. And Scott does that interview. hahahha.

I was so amped that night i think i was leaking testosterone all over the house. Bart's job was to go head to head with the 300 behemoths so the other linebackers can make the tackles. Bart is a MAN.

Too bad he wont be back with the team this year. Anyways...i know that wasnt the
point of your thread just NEVER expected to see that clip on here, well not posted by any emale except, USCTAURUSGIRL who just kicks ass and some dude will be a lucky SOB!

Oh and for the record....i almost puked when i heard we signed Tim Tebow.
What a stupid organization i root for. But thats for another forum entirely.

click to expand

HAAAAAAAAAAAH I KNOW AND DIDN'T YA'LL GET SCREWED PAYING FOR HIS END DEAL CONTRACT STATEMENTS?

STFU I'm a Patriots fan, but the Jets aren't HALF bad... well... take away Sanchez and now that ya'll got T-BONED - he's going to plummet his already failing confidence when he hears Tebow from the crowd..

I didn't post this within the Sports section because it's mainly dominated with outer-USA sports. Whenever you have an American football thread, message me and let me know or something - geesh! I'm a bigger football fan than I let on. Hockey too. Thanks for being polite though and trying not to derail a thread. This is a Misc forum though - any derailing is acceptable.

Posted by MzSagittarius
Surely, one day as the opposite gender isn't enough! You're getting used to all these parts and how to work 'em...

I propose a week.

Not in the summer though... Goldbond + boys = unbreakable bond.

Don't want to handle that myself 😢

Posted by sheathedclaws

Posted by AA
please for once lets not hear all the women hear say "play around with it" or "do the helicopter" or "stick it things" or "wank all day" or "slap it" or "piss on all the public toilets seats" or "slowly but seductively flop it out in front of dog" or "aggressively thrust backwards and forwards creating a nice sounding slapping noise" or "tuck it in and pretend you have a fadge" or "tuck the testicles in see if you can the testicles in the mirror" Or refer to it as "it" okay. It may not be as technologically advanced as the female genitalia, but sure deserves more respect than "it".

TECHNOLOGICALLY ADVANCED?! What - do they make iVaginas nowadays?

You want me to be more creative with male genitalia? That's basically what you're saying.

I will say, once I pretended 'Dr.' (the name for a certain past lover's genitalia) was a mustache. It was lulz and all for a moment but then we got back to work. I think that's a 6/10 on the shlong creativity meter.

Should I name my hypothetical manly bits? 😛

click to expand

LMAO you called your ex's donky-donk Dr Mario?


And sorry, instead of "technologically advanced" i should of said 'high maintenance'.
C'mon? You can't deny that one surely.
The penis is just so simple. (maybe that's it's appeal?)

I should probably out, the OP (i think) hasn't suggested this has "pretend gender swap" is NOT purely genital related?
Thought i'd point out the obvious there.

So with that being said, i would have a lovely shower, wrap a towel round my hair, and spend all morning experimenting with make-up. Trying all sorts of foundations and lip gloss etc...





... what?

It's just like origami.

Posted by sheathedclaws

Posted by wgamador2

Posted by sheathedclaws

Hahaha. This is great.
Cause, Im a huge Jets fan so I remember that night when we beat the Patriots and no one believed the mighty Pats could lose, especially to us. And Scott does that interview. hahahha.

I was so amped that night i think i was leaking testosterone all over the house. Bart's job was to go head to head with the 300 behemoths so the other linebackers can make the tackles. Bart is a MAN.

Too bad he wont be back with the team this year. Anyways...i know that wasnt the
point of your thread just NEVER expected to see that clip on here, well not posted by any emale except, USCTAURUSGIRL who just kicks ass and some dude will be a lucky SOB!

Oh and for the record....i almost puked when i heard we signed Tim Tebow.
What a stupid organization i root for. But thats for another forum entirely.

HAAAAAAAAAAAH I KNOW AND DIDN'T YA'LL GET SCREWED PAYING FOR HIS END DEAL CONTRACT STATEMENTS?

STFU I'm a Patriots fan, but the Jets aren't HALF bad... well... take away Sanchez and now that ya'll got T-BONED - he's going to plummet his already failing confidence when he hears Tebow from the crowd..

I didn't post this within the Sports section because it's mainly dominated with outer-USA sports. Whenever you have an American football thread, message me and let me know or something - geesh! I'm a bigger football fan than I let on. Hockey too. Thanks for being polite though and trying not to derail a thread. This is a Misc forum though - any derailing is acceptable.

Despite the fact that you are a Pats fan.

Yep I just got owned by the 1500 character rule.

LMAO.
I typed some good shit but im not re-typing all of it.

Just basically was saying that nothing is sexier than a girl who knows about sports. Its what you ladies must feel like when your man leads the way at Pier 1 Imports or Christmas Tree Shops. hahahahaha. Its gotta be the same feeling.

Anyways, despite the fact that your a Pats fan, your sexy level just went up.

And yes, we paid 2.5 million to secure Tebow. A guy who cannot WIN in this league, not with his arm and accuracy, he SUCKS!
This move was made to sell jerseys and sell PSL's. Im so disgusted.
The worst part for me is I HATE THE WILDCAT FORMATION with a passion. I think its lame and belongs in the college game not the PRO's. I hate taking the ball out of the QB's hands, nothing is more valuable to an NFL QB than getting into that passing rythm. Can you imagine Brees or Bady coming out for a few plays so a gimmick wildcat garvage play can be run for what?, 4 yards?
I hate what my team is planning to do on offense. How many Super Bowls do the Steelers, 49ers and Cowboys have without ever employing the gimmick wildcat formation?
Im disgusted.

After 9 words you hit the text limit. New record.

Oh, dear - Christmas Tree Shop? Pier 1?! I've never stepped one foot in those places and the only time I bring a guy shopping is for when he's buying my heels.

Tebow needs to go back to collegiate FB. That's literally the only place he belongs - except for church.

I'm surprised the Jets didn't back out once the $ went up. But by then the hype was out so... couldn't be cheap. Sucks for Sanchez... and don't get me started with the 3 y contract, was it? Fuck.

Brady actually freed up millions again after reformatting his contract for drafting for Pats. Even if you dislike him, seriously - that's something pros rarely sees. That's just genuine good sportsmanship for the team.

Don't hate on Cowboys either 😉

Posted by sheathedclaws
After 9 words you hit the text limit. New record.

Oh, dear - Christmas Tree Shop? Pier 1?! I've never stepped one foot in those places and the only time I bring a guy shopping is for when he's buying my heels.

Tebow needs to go back to collegiate FB. That's literally the only place he belongs - except for church.

I'm surprised the Jets didn't back out once the $ went up. But by then the hype was out so... couldn't be cheap. Sucks for Sanchez... and don't get me started with the 3 y contract, was it? Fuck.

Brady actually freed up millions again after reformatting his contract for drafting for Pats. Even if you dislike him, seriously - that's something pros rarely sees. That's just genuine good sportsmanship for the team.

Don't hate on Cowboys either 😉

I LATE YOU!

thats a combination of loving and hating you at the same time. Good thing we didnt meet in person and were smitten with one another cause id be all conflicted. hahahahahahahhhhhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhahahahahahahahahahaaaaaa

lets see
i get to pee standing up (awesome)
i would leave the toilet seat up
i will sit next to my gf with my hands down my pants
i will see what is so important and/or comforting about holding dick all the time.
i will walk around the house naked and let my balls dangle around
i would masturbate a couple of times a day to master the craft, for when i turn back into a woman. 😈
i will wear boxer briefs to show off how huge i am
ooh and i would flash my neighbor on the fifth floor, just because.

Posted by Dominooo
Then it's all over the walls...the ceiling...

you're screaming in agony as someone walks in going 'OMG DUDE, WHAT'S WRONG' and then bam...piss all over 'them'. Guns get shot... bathroom gets put on fire (electrical fire)...

oh the horror...

well damn, LMAO @then bam...piss all over 'them'. ha. gun shots..... really omg ha ha ha ha ha ha

Piss off the porch.

And then go to a bar to see what men really talk about when no gals are around.

Posted by EyesOfFire
@ Sheathed, your new picture looks like


The raised eye brows, the evil smile, the crazy eyes.. if only you had the mustache. =D

😭

I would suck my own dick instead of asking others to do it.

Posted by WaterCup
I would suck my own dick instead of asking others to do it.

We have ribs too...

Fuck ribs if i need a good head. I'll deal with the outcome after. I've seen guys doing it all over the internet. Whats that saying- if there's a will, there's a way.

Posted by thebiggcarlos
one thing is for certain, i don't understand this thread at all. no matter how many times i read everybody's responses i still don't understand. maybe i'm just old fashioned and find it hard to keep up with you young cats.
well someone zero me in.

If you woke up tomorrow and reached for your morning wood and found it had become an innie... what would you do?

or

You're a woman for 24 hours because your third genie wish went horribly wrong, what next?



Either way, you're twig and berries were replaced. You now have violent mood swings, you bleed from your crotch (My luck I would be PMSing on my lady day), your hair just won't cooperate, and you feel bloated today... you're a woman. What do you do now?

Do you go rent a seedy motel room and stare at your lady bits all day?
Do you see what the largest object you could insert into your new receptical is?
Do you do the double helicopter with your sweater puppies? That's roughly equvilent to all the ladies seem to want to twirl around their new cocks right?
Do you think about something besides sex (even if for only a minute) now that your brain is a womans too.
Do you go give an old man a charity hand job?

^^ double post... the site is being wonky. I guess all my talk about body parts got it excited.

Posted by EyesOfFire
@ Sheathed, your new picture looks like


The raised eye brows, the evil smile, the crazy eyes.. if only you had the mustache. =D

Dunno dude, ... think a picture of Katy Perry would of sufficed...

The monopoly guy i'm not too sure about. But i like you imagination. Despite how bizarre it may be...

Posted by Layna
Oh, I'd go pierce my ear on the RIGHT side, too, even though I'd be hitting on the ladies. I'm a rebel that way.

You're my hero.

Ugh, I lul'ed so hard reading this.

Still am.

Posted by EyesOfFire
@ Sheathed, your new picture looks like


The raised eye brows, the evil smile, the crazy eyes.. if only you had the mustache. =D

OH SORRY LET ME CHANGE MY PHOTO TO BETTER SUIT YOUR NEEDS, OH HIGHNESS. I SHOULD HAVE ASKED PERMISSION FROM YOU FIRST.



IS THIS SUITABLE FOR YOUR LIKING, MAJESTY?

Well, I always forget my screen names unless they rhyme with my name. Shh. 😛

And I didn't want gayshay or shaypay or ohheyshay or....

Femme la bouche, monsieur!

I need 20 jesters today.

...It's because you're mean and smelly 😭

Posted by EyesOfFire

Posted by AA

Posted by EyesOfFire
@ Sheathed, your new picture looks like


The raised eye brows, the evil smile, the crazy eyes.. if only you had the mustache. =D

Dunno dude, ... think a picture of Katy Perry would of sufficed...

The monopoly guy i'm not too sure about. But i like you imagination. Despite how bizarre it may be...

Wtf, dude! Why is the aries troll trolling the scorpio troll's trolling?

I thought we were friends!

click to expand

Hey dude i was just tryin' to be a hero.

And if that means cutting down my fellow man, then so be it.

that picture is genuinely creepy tho...

Posted by AA
that picture is genuinely creepy tho...

.... Which one? -cracks knuckles- 😛

I'd go, see and do what its like having a male body to play with. What those things are well thats secret, does that mean my mind will change coz I have a male body? Or is it going to be the same? Actually one question does having either female or male body change a persons mind?

Not sure if mind/personality would change much unless you have a more extreme leaning side of hormones, I would expect to be just as silly/crazy as I currently am.
I'd find it interesting to be a woman for a day/week. However it would be much more fun to see if my exes were as good in bed as a man. *dirty laugh*
...don't think I'd explore my own crotch, I'd have a panic attack if I pulled a gooey dried blood clot or had blood dripping from down there.

Posted by IntoTheChaos
...don't think I'd explore my own crotch, I'd have a panic attack if I pulled a gooey dried blood clot or had blood dripping from down there.

A while back I had a co-worker tell me I needed to get in touch with my feminine side. I told her, "If I had a feminine side... I'd never stop touching it."

Sidenote: I can only imagine, but I'm sure that women know there is a gooey dried blood clot in their pants without sticking a hand down there and exploring. 😛

Ooooooo!!!

You know how guys play with our dicks and we have come up with funny stuff to do with it (ring, bridge, elephant, etc), I'd see what I could contort my shiny new nether regions into. And yes, my nether regions would be shiney... washed, waxed, and buffed!

Posted by LibraSid
Ooooooo!!!

You know how guys play with our dicks and we have come up with funny stuff to do with it (ring, bridge, elephant, etc), I'd see what I could contort my shiny new nether regions into. And yes, my nether regions would be shiney... washed, waxed, and buffed!

Buffed? 😛

Posted by LibraSid
Ooooooo!!!

You know how guys play with our dicks and we have come up with funny stuff to do with it (ring, bridge, elephant, etc), I'd see what I could contort my shiny new nether regions into. And yes, my nether regions would be shiney... washed, waxed, and buffed!

buffed—?

Posted by sheathedclaws

Posted by LibraSid
Ooooooo!!!

You know how guys play with our dicks and we have come up with funny stuff to do with it (ring, bridge, elephant, etc), I'd see what I could contort my shiny new nether regions into. And yes, my nether regions would be shiney... washed, waxed, and buffed!

Buffed? 😛

click to expand

LOL Jinx 🙂

Id get laid. Play w/ my big wiener, and then get more laid.

Go shirtless all day. Weenie wag myself in the mirror. Take a VERY long time in the shower. Place attractive sheer scarves lovingly on my erection. Hang a hat from it. Test to see how sensitive my balls REALLY are. See what blue balls is all about. Wank off in defiance. Lie to a woman and tell her I have 8" of raging fury ( really it's just 6 ladies, but it's super thick..swoon away. ) Inspect every bit of man hair I have. Give the finger to shaving. Inspect the lions mane around my johnson and roar for effect. Bend over in front of a mirror to get the full magic from all angles. Scratch myself whenever I felt like it. Go into the mens shower rooms and slap asses. High five other dudes. Let that testosterone rage and beat the shit out of someone after a rousing piss up. Put on a condom. Sniff the armpits of my t-shirts to see if they can go another day. Leave my underwear on the floor. Sit back in a recliner and watch someone with boobs do everything.

I think with some make up and a nice wig I can be a shemale.

Posted by chemengin

Posted by LibraSid
Ooooooo!!!

You know how guys play with our dicks and we have come up with funny stuff to do with it (ring, bridge, elephant, etc), I'd see what I could contort my shiny new nether regions into. And yes, my nether regions would be shiney... washed, waxed, and buffed!

buffed—?

Posted by sheathedclaws

Posted by LibraSid
Ooooooo!!!

You know how guys play with our dicks and we have come up with funny stuff to do with it (ring, bridge, elephant, etc), I'd see what I could contort my shiny new nether regions into. And yes, my nether regions would be shiney... washed, waxed, and buffed!

Buffed? 😛

click to expand

So it's fine to call it my nether regions and shape it into a butterfly but buffing it for extra shine is somehow too far? It's my day and I can involve power tools if I want to... wait what!?


😛