shit my dad says

Has anyone ever read this site? Funny shittttt


I especially find it funny cause my own father has let some serious gems leave his mouth over the years.
He's an Aqua, and totally weird and introverted. Not to mention he's a total redneck, loves killing shit. You know.


Soooo I'm dedicating this thread to "shit my dad says"

Post funny shit your dad says. 🙂

"You need to quit fucking cussing"

When something is good...like food....he'll say "man this is fuckin' jam-up ain't it?

When my sister's dog got hit by a car and died a while back he says:
"Kel, I know it fucking sucks, but get over it, you can't do a goddamn thing about it. Go get yourself a new dog and stop crying."

Lol

This one always confused me as a kid:

"I'm cold...put your coat on."

Lol

"Are you really going to let a little jewish girl take your tricycle? Get out there and whoop her ass"


Lmao

"See I knew we should have just called you Brian. You look like a little boy with that haircut."

BRUTAL

"Nothing wrong with a little salad before the main course." In reference ( and his confusion ) to all the below deck shaving that goes on now. "Try not to masturbate too much Bonk." as he sails out the door after coffee. Usually with one of my smart mouthed retorts following behind and our laughter.

"Close that pneumonia hole!" ( Doesn't everyones Dad say this when a door or window is open? )

Dd not fuck up
For years I always made the female get on the bottom.

Hahahhahaa.