Anyone who could tell me their point of view please... I need some advice.

Hi, this is Cancer lady who met Pisces man five months ago. We started dating but he told me he has just ended up a relationship, but wished me not to get far from him. He kept on sending messages and one day I kissed him (I think I precipitated things, but I can’t regret that now ‘cause it’s already done) and he asked me: what are we gonna do? But no one proposed anything. We kept on dating like five more times, sometimes kissing, sometimes not, but I didn’t want to be his friend with benefits. One night we talked abt our relationship and he told me he was still in contact with his ex (who lives in a different city) because she has a problem (her mother had a terminal illness) and he is supporting her, then he said: do you want to have a relationship with me? I understood he was making that proposal and I said yes. Later he told me I had been the one who proposed that and he couldn’t reject me because I liked me much. That lasted one month. Within that time we barely saw each other because he works as a security guard and don’t have much time, but he was texting all day. I had my first sexual relationship with him (no regrets about that because I felt ready. I am 27, but I didn’t want to do it before because I had never felt so comfortable with a man). During that month, he mentioned his ex three different times: first when he told me about her mother’s illness: secondly one day I told him he had had no details with me. That day I went to his house and he had a picture of him and his ex on his dressing table, he told me he had lost details with his ex too and that contributed to put an end to their relationship. And the third time: one night I told him I felt insecure because he still loved his ex and I wanted to finish what we had because I deserved the same I was offering: someone totally available to love me. All of this was said without arguing. And we ended all. From that day we have been texting every two days, seeing each other once in a while, saying we miss each other. I have told him I thank him for everything and what I learnt about this relationship. And he told me he knew I was an opportunity he was missing because I am a good person, but he had her in his heart and he wanted to “see the end of his story with her” (btw his relationship is toxic, they have never been fine, they see each other like once a month, sometimes they stop talking but she always looks for him and is always texting him.) The other day he told me he wanted to have sex with me and I said: no because I’m not your friend with benefits, precisely because I have read that if you fall in that, pisces never take you seriously. The point is: I don’t know whether I should stop talking to him or not. I want to be in contact with him because besides our story was short, it was transcendental for me and he is important in my life. But I still have feelings for him, I like him, I miss him, I don’t see him as a friend, and I have tried to get far from him but he looks for me (sending messages), and he knows this, although he doesn’t know it hurts me much, he doesn’t even imagine that I have cried a lot for this situation. He tells me I am important for him and he wouldn’t like to stop seeing me. What do you think I should do guys? Honestly I feel bad, I think I am getting stagnant in this situation.

Thanks in advance for reading me, I know I wrote much…

Fellow Crab here. He's looking for a rebound; he said he wasn't over his ex and wanted to see the end of the story with her. He then told you he wanted to have sex with you. Taking the relationship any further is only going to cause more hurt for you.

Sometimes the ones we want and hold onto in our lives are not the ones we need.

He still loves his ex & is hung up on her & will be for some time..he's a waste of your precious time hunnie , sorry

Thank you both for your comments. It hurts, but I think you're right... It won't go any further.. It will be a waste of time and energy 😢

Posted by AdrianaCrabTor
Thank you both for your comments. It hurts, but I think you're right... It won't go any further.. It will be a waste of time and energy 😢

Even though it sounds like you've resolved things already

I just wanted to add ...the reason why you miss him isn't because he's an exceptional person per se

but because you had sex with him...and moreover he's also the first person you've been with.

There's a type of deep bonding that takes places for females when they have sex with males.

Certain chemicals ( e.g- oxytocin) are released in the brain that are responsible for feelings of attachment.