Completely and hoplessly heartbroken

ya. i finally told the girl of my dreams and my best friend how i felt abt her for nearly a decade and she said that she cant give me what i want. not even a maybe. both of us are fish.. dunno how thats possible. i dont feel as bad as i thought i would but maybe it hasnt sunken in completely. or maybe ive just accepted it... dont know but i think it might get a lot worse. its my first real heartbreak. but i feel strangely good... as if ive got nothing to lose and im invincible. i hate the feeling of missing her but im glad to have this life experience. a nice story to tell - the one that got away.

Posted by Nights22
Ah that pesky friendzone. You waited a tad too long so she let you down easy but its a good thing you got it out and a good thing that you feel good about it.

so its nights22 now is it? how are u man? long time no see. i had to wait for quite a while - she had been dating a close friend of mine for a long long time. after their breakup i waited for a yr before telling her. its just really annoying that i wasnt ever on her radar or ever will be. it just hurt my pride so this small amount of hate will def keep me from getting too depressed. damn.. i shldve asked if it was possible to have this "friends-with-benefits" kinda relationship with her before confessing my love. i really wanna fuck her too (because shes super seductive and i think the sex will be even more awesome because i love her... also, she's really really hot). anyway, i feel ok about it now because im kinda pissed more than sad but i wonder how im gonna feel later on.

we're going to be friends but im afraid it wont be the same. but shes sweet.. she told me that nothing has to change as long as i lose these romantic feelings for her and she trusts me to tell her truthfully when it does happen. in my mind i was thinking "babe, it wont ever happen if the hate builds."

Posted by Nights22
Ive been aight dude.
You should probably drop her as a friend...
Fo real though because we both kno those feelings are gonna linger and just frustrate you.

yessss! i know and i hate it. fuuuuck! just wish she wasnt so hot in every possible way.

Posted by jgonzo
It took courage for you to be honest w/ her. I hope you are doing okay and not regretting your decision to be honest. I'm guessing it's because you wanted to know if there was hope or if you should swim along to warmer waters. I wish you the best and that you find a true love.

I'll be thinking about you and wishing you the best.

JGonzo

thank you so much for your wishes, really. it took everything i had to tell her. yes, youre absolutely right, i wanted to know for sure- i didnt want to have any regrets and i wanted some kind of closure if not anything else.

im extremely possessive and that actually helped me accept things a little easier. if i want something really badly, i try as hard as possible to get it... but if i know for sure that its hopeless and out of my reach, i stop trying. i hadnt distanced myself from her in the past because i thought that there was some glimmer of hope. she's definitely worth the effort. in fact, tonight we went to watch hangover 2 along with 2 other friends of ours and nothing is awkward at all... everything still is so natural with her. but whatever happens im not looking back... we will be friends and nothing more or less. even if she, by chance in the future, starts to get attracted to me, i will reject her even if i still have lingering feelings... because she really hurt me and killed my pride. she actually said that shes not even giving me a maybe. its an absolute no... despite our long history and connection. i dont think im that unattractive too... well whatever, im just glad its over so now i can actually get on with my life... and im really lookin forward to drown my sorrows for real to experience another cliche. ive never gotten drunk for being depressed before. 😛

Don't let the hate build no matter what. The situation's out of your control, really out of everyone's control, since it's not really voluntary to determine who you feel comfortable being intimate with at given time. It's just something that comes. You hold a grudge, it will hold back a lot of good things from coming into your life. I have dealt with so many different situations like this, seriously. It is seriously the worst thing you could do. I'm even careful around friends who don't vibe with me anymore. If they get hateful about it that's their problem, but I make sure I'm positive as possible about everything.


FYI, in case it makes my experience more relevant to you, I'm like your female analogue, since I'm a decan I Pisces also born in '85.

Posted by extempjunk
Don't let the hate build no matter what. The situation's out of your control, really out of everyone's control, since it's not really voluntary to determine who you feel comfortable being intimate with at given time. It's just something that comes. You hold a grudge, it will hold back a lot of good things from coming into your life. I have dealt with so many different situations like this, seriously. It is seriously the worst thing you could do. I'm even careful around friends who don't vibe with me anymore. If they get hateful about it that's their problem, but I make sure I'm positive as possible about everything.


FYI, in case it makes my experience more relevant to you, I'm like your female analogue, since I'm a decan I Pisces also born in '85.

hey,

thanks for your advice. i know what u say is true and i will try as hard as possible to not let the hate build because its ugly. but sometimes i dont think its in my hands because if im not over her and i start getting jealous, thatll lead to anger which isnt me. so for now i have to force my mind to believe that shes not worth it and that there are way better girls than her. i have to look at only her bad points and blur out the good. i have to train my subconscious to not give a crap about anything related to her like its used to.