My fish makes me evolve.

Yeah, I tried like 8 different headings for this; that one ended up the winner. 🙂

So, things I've noticed since dating my Pisces/Aries cusp...

I feel like he makes me a more mature scorpio. It's so strange, because I would normally never attribute any evolvement on my part to a guy I'm dating...I would so much rather take all the credit for any improvement in myself. But, he is so relaxed and mellow about everything, I can't help but learn from him. When I do have minor scorpionic attacks, say I get jealous about something small and probably meaningless, he laughs, and says, "oh, you're funny." lol...which took some time to get used to, but now when that happens it actually makes me laugh too, at myself, and at him because it's so funny to me that I'm over here having this stupid internal freakout, when it's obvious that those kinds of freakouts are so foreign to him. It forces me to consider in that moment how much happier I would be if I would just relax. And then, magically, I do.

And perhaps I should attribute this more to his Arian side (or is this a Pisces thing??), but he is ready and willing, and I think enjoys "fixing" all kinds of things for me. I mean that in a literal and figurative sense. One time he assembled almost all the furniture in my house without being asked. It took him six hours. I could point to many similar examples. I didn't know Pisces were so motivated! Now, I wouldn't necessarily call him "nurturing"...I don't know how to explain it really but there's a definite difference between his way of showing he cares as opposed to um...every single Cancer I've dated (and there have been many)...my Pisces is more reserved, or something. When it comes to verbally expressing his feelings. He's definitely more of a "traditional" type of man in that way. And I'm okay with that, suprisingly. I think *because* he does other, more tangible things, I will be okay without hearing songs written for me, or reading poetry written for me, or being his shoulder to cry on, or whatever. Like for example, my Scorpio ex would always be very nurturing and attentive whenever I was sick, but my Pisces doesn't do that. I mean, he'll sweetly say "I hope you feel better sweety." But he doesn't ask me if he can get me anything or bring me anything or whatever. But that's okay, because I guess I don't really need to feel co-dependant or anything. It's just so different than when I was with my Scorpio ex. (to be cont'd)

So I am also learning to be more independant, because of him. That's a good thing, right?

We have a very interesting relationship. He is a few years older, and has been married and divorced. I have never been married. I am sure that although he would like me to think he harbors no lingering issues about getting divorced, he does, I am sure. But that's okay. I've had to really work on fighting my scorpion tendency to "wonder what that means." He's divorced. It was traumatic. He has the right to have some issues and I understand why he wouldn't want me to think he does.

So, in that way I am also learning to evolve.

Now, I'm not saying he's perfect, no one is, nor am I...but this is definitely the most fascinating relationship I've ever had. He is this huge mystery to me...so intriguing...our relationship vascillates between lots and lots of chatter for hours and hours, and then just this very comforting silence. For hours and hours. It's so strange! Normally I would hate either of those extremes. But with him, I enjoy them. There is so much unspoken, but I have the feeling that it's all positive that will continue to unravel and be revealed slowly as time progresses.

I would just be fascinated to hear from other Pisceans about these things. Any guidance/info/support/funny comments you have would be great! 🙂

hey phoenix,

I thought you were dating a scorpio guy? Is that over?

I was. I was living with one, in fact. Yes, it is over.

I just realized we almost have the same name. Great scorpion minds thinking alike. 😛

Mkay, Fishies. Start talkin'!

Phoenix_rising were you over on the aries board at some point? I thought it was an Aries you were dating..I think the pisces/Aries cusp is great..you get the best of both worlds..you have the leader, initiator and risk taker and then you also have the emotions that us Scorps need..way to go...he sounds like a good un....Keep it up! 🙂

Yeah, The Aries was after the Scorp...it was brief, fun while it was good and then a disaster in the end; it's actually a great thing that we got away from each other.

And I think you're right, I think obviously I am attracted to many Arian qualities but since it didn't work with an Aries, perhaps it will with this guy because he actually has some wateriness to him. 😛 Thanks for the support MM!

Trust me, a bit of fire in the water is good..at least you know where you stand!...

😉

Phoenix_rising ... my Scorpio son has made me evolve also, whereas nobody else has had the power to do this .. there's something about the way these two signs connect on a deeper level.

I'm sure he's probably feeling the same way about you 🙂

Thanks you guys! I do really admire many Piscean qualities that I wish I had. I hope he feels the same about me. He's going through a bunch of stuff right now...career mishaps, sick family members etc...I really hope he doesn't swim away from me just because I might be the easiest thing to cut away right now...I told him if he wanted to talk about anything, I am 100% here for him, to which he replied, "thank you, I appreciate that." But as I said he's not big on verbalizing his feelings, so I don't know if he'll really utilize my being there for him. Right now I'm just trying not to add any stress to his life and I'm trying to minimize my most scorpiest stuff so as not to scare him away. lol...

The only scary Scorpio thingy you really have to worry about is the obssessive/possessive impulse that is in your nature. This will send the Fish swimming .. guaranteed.

"I really hope he doesn't swim away from me just because I might be the easiest thing to cut away right now"

That's not really in our nature to do this .. when we swim away from a person, it isn't based around who is expendable as it pertains to emotional burdens and some of the load has to be dumped. Pisces are experts at dealing with intense emotional trauma .... we don't really have to dump of some the burden in the reality in which you refer.

"he's not big on verbalizing his feelings, so I don't know if he'll really utilize my being there for him. Right now I'm just trying not to add any stress to his life"

We kind of work a little different from most people in regards to this. Adding stress to us isn't a burden if it comes from compassion. It's all a matter of where your aim is with this. If this is coming out being possessive, and wanting attention .. then he'll see you as a burden. But, if this is coming from a place in which he recognizes that your being close to him is for his benefit to give him a place for refuge of his troubles .. then he won't see you as being a burden, or scary.

As far as him not being too verbal with his emotions, and as it relates to my first thoughts and telling you that we are experts at emotional trauma and not to worry about how much emotional stress is on his shoulders ......... we process emotions on a different level from everybody else. This is the reason why we can take the wieght of the world and still have the ability to carry on with our life without any emotional baggage.

"Over there", on the other side of the rainbow, is where we process our feelings .. so over there, is where we dump our strain.

Have you ever noticed how a Pisces can talk openly, objectively, appearing as if we couldn't care a less about something really serious that should be gut-wrenching? It leaves a person to think that we're cold blooded .. no remorse or conscience. Yet, when we do verbalize this incident, we are talking about how horrible it is, how sad, we were so upset we hardly knew what to do with ourselves .... yet, we show no signs of feeling what our words are describing.

It's impossible to place too much emotional stress on us .... we'll just dive down deep, seperate from the trauma and then resurface with the awareness in place that it exists, without actually feeling the pain or heartache ..... yet, have the ability to discuss it.

Wow!! I cannot tell you how much ALL of what you just said rings true. Thank you so much P Angel, I really appreciate how detailed and accurate your insights are. Particularly the part about how you can discuss something tragic etc without appearing affected by it. That is VERY true with him. I am glad to know that it doesn't at all mean that you are cold...I think in the past a few times I have wondered about that. But it really puts my soul at ease to know that it is just your nature and that this is HOW you are able to take on so much. And thank you for the advice about watching that natural possessive/obsessive thing. In the last couple of days I have tried out a new approach with him, which is seeming to really work well for both of us. I have tried to be very understanding without probing him too much for information (which is my nature), and to be a little more nonchalant, for example instead of saying things like, "it's too bad we have so little time to spend together" etc, I am saying, "I understand you're under a tremendous amount of stress right now so I completely understand if we can't see each other for a while, whatever you need." Things like that. Which, when I say them, and when I choose the non-demanding statements instead of the demanding ones, he seems to really perk up, and he says, "thank you for that, I appreciate that. I'm going to try my best to get together with you at some point this week." It seems to calm him...I'm learning that Pisces, unlike Cancer, needs a different kind of support...almost seems like they need support WITH space. Almost a "removed" kind of support. Very interesting. Also it's a year to the day when his ex wife served him with divorce papers, so I'm sure he must be feeling weird if not depressed.

Do you think there's anything specific I should *say* to him, to prove that I'm patient, and not demanding, and not needy, or does Pisces prefer a more quiet, wordless kind of demonstration of devotion?

"I'm learning that Pisces, unlike Cancer, needs a different kind of support...almost seems like they need support WITH space. Almost a "removed" kind of support. Very interesting."


lol, yes ... we are opposites of Cancer when it comes to this. They need constant reassurances, whereas we need to be alone to process our feelings. And then we have wonderful Scorpios sitting in the middle, being the balancer, who requires both. 🙂


Here's a little example of my relationship with my husband that might help you. You'll have to figure out how to apply it though .....


Because Pisces role is to nurture our partners, our loved ones .. while being an emotional water person ... we respond to aiding and helping people we care about emotionally.

So, if my husband (or any loved-one) approaches me saying something like, "I'm really bothered about something and need to talk", with a puppy-dog face .. I'll stop whatever it is I'm doing to go his side. If he comes right now and says, "You don't pay attention to me." .. I cringe and think this is being demanding of me.

If my son calls me and says, "I have a problem and don't know what to do about it," ... I'll erase all other thoughts in my head and focus on whatever it is he needs me for.

So, when it comes to emotionally supporting my family when they are in need ..... they take top priority in life.

How you use this, you'll know best because you know him .... but, if you make it known to him that you need him to help you soothe your emotions in some way ... he'll regard you very highly because we believe it is apart of our job in life to support and nurture the feelings of the people we love ... and we do this with upmost devotion and attention.

Hope that helps to give you some insight on how to express to him how much you need him.🙂

It absolutely does help, tremendously. Thank you!

It seems to be very much a matter of *how* I phrase things to him. I will forever keep that in mind. 🙂

I confirm it, the way you say it will make the difference, or even if you not say nothing, a smile changes all.

I have alot of aries in me, and a feel I am capable of many things, but I have to feel loved and supported, so my conclusion is that he feels loved and supported by you 🙂