candy10
@candy10
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CAPRICORN MAN CONFUSING
I promise I've read this before. Did you post this months ago?
Yeah, she posted this same tale in February.. this Cap (friend) has had her twisted up for 3 1/2, 4 YEARS now. She be buggin'.
LOOOL sorry everyone...
yess there was a lot more new stuff actually which couldnt all be posted in one go so here goes
yess there was a lot more new stuff actually which couldnt all be posted in one go so here goes
This was what he hinted to me ONLY a couple of months ago after the song sending he said that
that he wants a relationship... in that time i basically said that i don't want one now....im not looking for it..and this isnt the time.... but its not like i said i dont see you that way nothing of that sort..
and we've still continued contact he still calls me i call him etc... etc... but as friends
next thing i know only today...
he says to me that he met up with some other girl who is really interested in him , how shes the one who likes him and that he thinks she's too keen and he doesn't like it... YET... he's seen her a couple of times...and they went on what seemed like a date... to the cinema and then they went to a park..and according to him she was very touchy feely... and everytime she got too close he would try to stop anything from happening... BUT then he said that at one point she ended up kissing him he said he didn't kiss her back or whatever... and that he isn't going to see her again ..even though she's very persistent. and then he says to me she looked so good that he was finding it hard to get away from her ...and i just thought to myself its bad enough what you're telling me in the first place yet you have to add on those extra details about how great she looked?
what i dont understand is why is it that not too long ago he's declaring that he's "losing it over me" wants to meet me up and see what happens..and then he goes out and meets with this girl knowing that she really likes him...allows her to kiss him but then doesn't want to go any further with her or see her again EVEN THOUGH SHE APPARENTLY LOOKS HOT..it just doesn't make any sense... and then at the same time he's always asking me to keep in touch with him and talks to me so seriously about marriage and the future and absolutely everything thats on his mind. :/
that he wants a relationship... in that time i basically said that i don't want one now....im not looking for it..and this isnt the time.... but its not like i said i dont see you that way nothing of that sort..
and we've still continued contact he still calls me i call him etc... etc... but as friends
next thing i know only today...
he says to me that he met up with some other girl who is really interested in him , how shes the one who likes him and that he thinks she's too keen and he doesn't like it... YET... he's seen her a couple of times...and they went on what seemed like a date... to the cinema and then they went to a park..and according to him she was very touchy feely... and everytime she got too close he would try to stop anything from happening... BUT then he said that at one point she ended up kissing him he said he didn't kiss her back or whatever... and that he isn't going to see her again ..even though she's very persistent. and then he says to me she looked so good that he was finding it hard to get away from her ...and i just thought to myself its bad enough what you're telling me in the first place yet you have to add on those extra details about how great she looked?
what i dont understand is why is it that not too long ago he's declaring that he's "losing it over me" wants to meet me up and see what happens..and then he goes out and meets with this girl knowing that she really likes him...allows her to kiss him but then doesn't want to go any further with her or see her again EVEN THOUGH SHE APPARENTLY LOOKS HOT..it just doesn't make any sense... and then at the same time he's always asking me to keep in touch with him and talks to me so seriously about marriage and the future and absolutely everything thats on his mind. :/
I don't get what's confusing really.
It seems he liked you but you haven't given him the green-light, so he went back to friend zone and is keeping it there until he feels that it's okay to really pursue something with you.
Since the two of you are friends, he's not going to wait on you or keep info from you. He's still going to go out and meet other people. Maybe the details of how good she looked was to get a reaction, maybe not. Either way, being good looking is not enough for a Cap to be with someone.
My Cap friend liked me, but he'd still mention other women, the dates he'd go on, the relationships, the cheating etc. I'd think to myself *there is no way he expects me to EVER date him knowing all of this* lol, but I was a good friend who just happened to also be a person of interest. All he ever needed from me was the green-light, and it would all shut down, or at-least that's what I'd think lol.
I think that's how your friend is with you. He's still going to go out and do him AND tell you all about it. That's what you do with friends.
It seems he liked you but you haven't given him the green-light, so he went back to friend zone and is keeping it there until he feels that it's okay to really pursue something with you.
Since the two of you are friends, he's not going to wait on you or keep info from you. He's still going to go out and meet other people. Maybe the details of how good she looked was to get a reaction, maybe not. Either way, being good looking is not enough for a Cap to be with someone.
My Cap friend liked me, but he'd still mention other women, the dates he'd go on, the relationships, the cheating etc. I'd think to myself *there is no way he expects me to EVER date him knowing all of this* lol, but I was a good friend who just happened to also be a person of interest. All he ever needed from me was the green-light, and it would all shut down, or at-least that's what I'd think lol.
I think that's how your friend is with you. He's still going to go out and do him AND tell you all about it. That's what you do with friends.
Posted by ElusiveSoul
Candy10??_..all I can say is that most (not all) cap guys are confusing. Hell, I??ve been dealing with one for a year now. Can be quite exhausting tho. I have come to a conclusion, for myself at least, I'm not going to do mental gymnastics over any man anymore. Trying to figure out what's going on in tier heads and act accordingly just perpetuates the problem. I read once , while back, on one of the other websites some rules of how to deal with cap man ( those rules were made in a humorous manner, but true ) and one of the rules was —expect to analyze and analyze, yet you still wan't figure the guy out—?_lol. I say true to that so I personally and just giving up and letting him do his thing. Easier said than done tho 😄
lol, well good to know he ain the only one and i ain the only one in a similar position..
to be honest i usually go with the flow with him... but as soon as i have a conversation with him... he'l ALMOST ALWAYS say something thought provoking... either to do with me and him but very indirect and hinty... or him and another girl... but it will be more direct..than when he talks of me and him ..and as a virgo i analyse to the death anyway...
ill come to a conclusion for myself...and speak to him again a few weeks later... he'll say something which again confusess me and its back to the beginning lol...im not even joking when i say...we've been going round and round and round in circles for the last couple of years.
but i cant blame it all on him...ill admit im just as complex lol..so maybe we do suit each other hahha
Posted by lnana04
I don't get what's confusing really.
It seems he liked you but you haven't given him the green-light, so he went back to friend zone and is keeping it there until he feels that it's okay to really pursue something with you.
Since the two of you are friends, he's not going to wait on you or keep info from you. He's still going to go out and meet other people. Maybe the details of how good she looked was to get a reaction, maybe not. Either way, being good looking is not enough for a Cap to be with someone.
My Cap friend liked me, but he'd still mention other women, the dates he'd go on, the relationships, the cheating etc. I'd think to myself *there is no way he expects me to EVER date him knowing all of this* lol, but I was a good friend who just happened to also be a person of interest. All he ever needed from me was the green-light, and it would all shut down, or at-least that's what I'd think lol.
I think that's how your friend is with you. He's still going to go out and do him AND tell you all about it. That's what you do with friends.
thats an interesting perspective there... i just didn't expect for him to put me in the friend zone and to start dating so soon after asking me about relationships...and if i want one and all that...
i dont kno how people move on so quickly lol...
whats confusing is the what happened with the girl also... he said he only met her twice and doesnt want to see her again..and whilst they met up..he told me he kept rejecting her advances... now why would he do that, i dont understand..and then before even gettin anywhwre with her even though shes trying her best with him he calls it a day and tells her that its the end of them meeting up
and are u saying we are on standby or something lol.... so what if he's dating and he meets a really nice girl..and then theyre dating or whatever..and all of a sudden i give him the green light... so hes not exactly going to ditch that girl is he
i'd see it more as i dont have a chance now anyway because he's going to get closer to other people
Ahh, your a Virgo! He likes you.
My sister is a Virgo, and Capricorn guys are scared of being direct with her for some reason. She'd get furious at her Cap friend because he always hinted at things and never really asked for what he wanted. For example, when he'd come into town he'd always be scared to ask her if she wanted to hang out, so he'd just say "I'm in town. I would hang out with you but I know your probably busy" and she'd just sit there fuming. I guess with you all they are extremely afraid of rejection.
My sister is a Virgo, and Capricorn guys are scared of being direct with her for some reason. She'd get furious at her Cap friend because he always hinted at things and never really asked for what he wanted. For example, when he'd come into town he'd always be scared to ask her if she wanted to hang out, so he'd just say "I'm in town. I would hang out with you but I know your probably busy" and she'd just sit there fuming. I guess with you all they are extremely afraid of rejection.
Goodness Candy, I'm trying to reply to your post but the board keeps cutting my post off lol. Here is what I was trying to say.
Caps can be extremely moody, so keep that in mind too. Maybe he had the courage that day, at that time, to hint at his feelings, but sometimes if things don't fall into place at that moment our mood kind of swing into another direction, if that makes any sense. If I was in his position, and didn't get the reaction I hoped for at that moment, then it would sour my mood and throw me off from the whole thing in general. I'd think maybe it's not meant to be, or not meant to be right now. I still think he likes you of course.
As far as the other girl, it seems like he didn't like her. He's not going to string her along if he feels there's nothing there.
I don't know if the two of you are on standby. For example. I haven't talked to my Cap friend in months *sheds tear* but he's had feelings for me for over 10yrs, he admitted. He's been married, got divorced, and he's engaged to be married. Do you think his feelings have disappeared through-out all of this? I doubt it. My point is, feelings for someone won't keep us from moving, especially if those feelings are not reciprocated. The feelings won't disappear either, which is weird, and how one can get into messy situations lol.
If you like him, maybe try hinting something to him.
Caps can be extremely moody, so keep that in mind too. Maybe he had the courage that day, at that time, to hint at his feelings, but sometimes if things don't fall into place at that moment our mood kind of swing into another direction, if that makes any sense. If I was in his position, and didn't get the reaction I hoped for at that moment, then it would sour my mood and throw me off from the whole thing in general. I'd think maybe it's not meant to be, or not meant to be right now. I still think he likes you of course.
As far as the other girl, it seems like he didn't like her. He's not going to string her along if he feels there's nothing there.
I don't know if the two of you are on standby. For example. I haven't talked to my Cap friend in months *sheds tear* but he's had feelings for me for over 10yrs, he admitted. He's been married, got divorced, and he's engaged to be married. Do you think his feelings have disappeared through-out all of this? I doubt it. My point is, feelings for someone won't keep us from moving, especially if those feelings are not reciprocated. The feelings won't disappear either, which is weird, and how one can get into messy situations lol.
If you like him, maybe try hinting something to him.
Posted by ElusiveSoul
@ Inana??_.See, that's just it??_..it drives me bonkers seriously. Now that my cap in question asked me to go and see him for the third time in the last 2 months I have no clue how to approach it due to all previous mind games. Went as far as saying — when ever you??re ready, I??ll be waiting on you—?_.hmmm. How do you take someone seriously after being put through serious of tests. Yes I do find that most male caps when they like a girl, initially they??ll just had in first, then back of and wait, plot and scheme till they find that the turf is safe and they can proceed without being rejected. I don't know, if I'm correct in my observation, but this seems to be the case when they really fancy a girl. Huh, I mentioned on the other thread, that mine just recently said to me : — You maybe intimidating to other guys, but not me.—?_however, what he said subsequently just went to reaffirm the fact that he IS/was intimidated to a degree. He also is under the impression that I see him more as a friend despite the fact that he knows I see him as a romantic prospect??_.I guess in a way this has been somewhat of a reason for all the push and pull scenario. Uncertainty and fear of rejection. Sometimes I just feel slapping the daylights out of him and just tell him to find a pair and speak up??_upsss??_I actually did say that and that's when he finally opened his damn mouth. Lord !!! smh * sighs* lolol
Cap guys 😄 LOL
You kind of gotta be rough with them sometimes. A little edgy. I think the politeness of a Virgo and Pisces, and all the other signs in between is probably what intimidates them the most. I can tell by how you write you have a very gentle way about doing things, and that can be intimidating, believe it or not. Many Caps excel at being abrasive and rubbing folks the wrong way lol. Sometimes a Cap likes to get cursed or for you to say "cut the BS already." lol. Works like a charm on the men. I'm somewhat just kidding lol, but don't be afraid to speak your mind with him and tell him to get to the point already.
Posted by lnana04
Ahh, your a Virgo! He likes you.
My sister is a Virgo, and Capricorn guys are scared of being direct with her for some reason. She'd get furious at her Cap friend because he always hinted at things and never really asked for what he wanted. For example, when he'd come into town he'd always be scared to ask her if she wanted to hang out, so he'd just say "I'm in town. I would hang out with you but I know your probably busy" and she'd just sit there fuming. I guess with you all they are extremely afraid of rejection.
yes oddly enough we happen to be astrologically extremely compatible lol..
aaawww cappies r soo funny arent they... i wish he would express how he feels for real... the last time he did it was like two years ago now and that was still only in a txt message... im not joking but word for word he proper described how he felt when he met me..., how he felt when we lost contact.. how he feels now... i literally read it a million times because i was so surprised :o
Posted by lnana04
Goodness Candy, I'm trying to reply to your post but the board keeps cutting my post off lol. Here is what I was trying to say.
Caps can be extremely moody, so keep that in mind too. Maybe he had the courage that day, at that time, to hint at his feelings, but sometimes if things don't fall into place at that moment our mood kind of swing into another direction, if that makes any sense. If I was in his position, and didn't get the reaction I hoped for at that moment, then it would sour my mood and throw me off from the whole thing in general. I'd think maybe it's not meant to be, or not meant to be right now. I still think he likes you of course.
As far as the other girl, it seems like he didn't like her. He's not going to string her along if he feels there's nothing there.
I don't know if the two of you are on standby. For example. I haven't talked to my Cap friend in months *sheds tear* but he's had feelings for me for over 10yrs, he admitted. He's been married, got divorced, and he's engaged to be married. Do you think his feelings have disappeared through-out all of this? I doubt it. My point is, feelings for someone won't keep us from moving, especially if those feelings are not reciprocated. The feelings won't disappear either, which is weird, and how one can get into messy situations lol.
If you like him, maybe try hinting something to him.
i totallly understand where you're coming from.. however i reply so late to everything anyway lol..by the time i do he has usually gone off the topic or doesn't want to talk about it, which is what happened that day
this girl he says was actually his friend from at least 5 years back..n then they lost contact... and now when she met up with him she was all over him lol... but it was just weirdo how he agreed to meet up with her ...but then tried to stop her from like doing things to him LOL....
don't the feelings ever go away? no matter how long? actually someone did say that to me the other day... so basically even when he's married with children he'll still remember me aww.. at least i've got that if nothing else 😢
Rule number 1: don't assume a thing.
number 2 : please let this guy know he's driving you insane with his confusing behaviour!!!
can we please stop trying to read between the lines and talk to people....??
Do u like him...? If yes tell him u like him and you don't like his behaviour...but if u don't...then u still need to talk to him.
I feel he actually likes you...but doesnt know how to tell you...
he's so honest...with you. except the part abt how he feels about you. please please let him know you deserve some straight up proper treatment in every aspect of this friendship/watevership and ask him to tell you watsup because he knows what kind of hints he's been giving you...so he better come clean or go home.
but if he does like you...i think its so sweet. He fought to keep off a hot girl for you 🙂 i mean do u know how cute that is...? Instead of him using the 'nobody is as hot as u'tip, he's like blatantly honest that damm she was hot but I fought her off for u,,,i mean its so cute. But yes, make sure first...
number 2 : please let this guy know he's driving you insane with his confusing behaviour!!!
can we please stop trying to read between the lines and talk to people....??
Do u like him...? If yes tell him u like him and you don't like his behaviour...but if u don't...then u still need to talk to him.
I feel he actually likes you...but doesnt know how to tell you...
he's so honest...with you. except the part abt how he feels about you. please please let him know you deserve some straight up proper treatment in every aspect of this friendship/watevership and ask him to tell you watsup because he knows what kind of hints he's been giving you...so he better come clean or go home.
but if he does like you...i think its so sweet. He fought to keep off a hot girl for you 🙂 i mean do u know how cute that is...? Instead of him using the 'nobody is as hot as u'tip, he's like blatantly honest that damm she was hot but I fought her off for u,,,i mean its so cute. But yes, make sure first...
Posted by leilaxxlovez
Rule number 1: don't assume a thing.
number 2 : please let this guy know he's driving you insane with his confusing behaviour!!!
can we please stop trying to read between the lines and talk to people....??
Do u like him...? If yes tell him u like him and you don't like his behaviour...but if u don't...then u still need to talk to him.
I feel he actually likes you...but doesnt know how to tell you...
he's so honest...with you. except the part abt how he feels about you. please please let him know you deserve some straight up proper treatment in every aspect of this friendship/watevership and ask him to tell you watsup because he knows what kind of hints he's been giving you...so he better come clean or go home.
but if he does like you...i think its so sweet. He fought to keep off a hot girl for you 🙂 i mean do u know how cute that is...? Instead of him using the 'nobody is as hot as u'tip, he's like blatantly honest that damm she was hot but I fought her off for u,,,i mean its so cute. But yes, make sure first...
hahah your post really made me laugh out loud 😄...
i think im driving him insane with my behaviour too lol..its not necessarily confusing...more like its only one way..but he might want it the other way..as in for me to open up and say something...
ur right he tells me EVERYTHING on his mind and i mean EVERYTHING...yet when it comes to all of this stuff... its like lets avoid the subject... or beat around the bush a little.
im not sure he would appreciate me forcing an answer out of him lol.. trust me he's not the type who likes people forcing him to do or say things.. he does everything his way when he wants and if he wants
your last few lines made me LOL the most... ye he did make a point in letting me know that he supposedly kept distracting the girl off him... or so she wouldnt get too close... lol.. HOWEVER... they did KISSS ahahah... and according to him she
did it first... but then i thought how can you not know someones about to kiss you..its like he let it happen...
i mean thas the way i see it... but it would be nice if it happened the way u think it did lol
i mean at the end of the day he didnt have to meet up with her in the first place :s
im soooo critical aren't i lol
Posted by ElusiveSoul
@ Inana??_.LOLOLOLAt excel in being abrasive 😉. Isn't that the truth tho heheheh. Ironically, I have been told so many times that I do come across as intimidating, even by leo guys *scratching my head*??_ its just that it always leaves me baffled how anyone could see me that way. It's not that I'm complaining tho, it's just surprising 😄 . You??re right tho, with cap guys ( well at least —my?? cap), you do have to be somewhat abrasive at times which rubs me the wrong way in return that it had to go that far.
@ candy??_..ahhwww girl, not all is lost!!! I agree with Inana. By the sound of things he really likes you??_what's the beef with you two??_.Get it on already (my venus in aries speaking here 😛)
lol thanksss... the problem with us two..is that we are far too similar it seems..with the way we approach things... both wimpss in this department hahah...which leadsss to repeatss of not much going on lol
if i was more like that keen girl he met up with... we'd probably b married by now ahah
Posted by ElusiveSoul
@ Inana??_.LOLOLOLAt excel in being abrasive 😉. Isn't that the truth tho heheheh. Ironically, I have been told so many times that I do come across as intimidating, even by leo guys *scratching my head*??_ its just that it always leaves me baffled how anyone could see me that way. It's not that I'm complaining tho, it's just surprising 😄 . You??re right tho, with cap guys ( well at least —my?? cap), you do have to be somewhat abrasive at times which rubs me the wrong way in return that it had to go that far.
@ candy??_..ahhwww girl, not all is lost!!! I agree with Inana. By the sound of things he really likes you??_what's the beef with you two??_.Get it on already (my venus in aries speaking here 😛)
lol thanksss... the problem with us two..is that we are far too similar it seems..with the way we approach things... both wimpss in this department hahah...which leadsss to repeatss of not much going on lol
if i was more like that keen girl he met up with... we'd probably b married by now ahah
Posted by ElusiveSoul
LOL candy??_.I can completely understand where you??re coming from tho. I hate finding myself in a predicament where you —have to?? force an answer out of somebody, especially when it comes to romantic feelings. Jesus??_.I hate it !!! Not to mention the fact, that the way I see it, he is the man, BE ONE and do something about the situation and not just beat around the bush. If you want it, go and get it??_I guess that's why I always have been attracted to fire sign guys.
Maybe you should give his a clear indication of how you feel. After all, there is nothing to lose really??_well ok, with the exception of the pride thing of course, but hey, if you don't try, you won't know !!!
"Not to mention the fact, that the way I see it, he is the man, BE ONE and do something about the situation and not just beat around the bush. If you want it, go and get it??_I guess that's why I always have been attracted to fire sign guys."
I'm like this too!!! I'm like come and claim me already lol! I like aggressive guys. Anything less I take as a sign that they are not that interested, even when they probably are.
Posted by ElusiveSoul
LOL candy??_.I can completely understand where you??re coming from tho. I hate finding myself in a predicament where you —have to?? force an answer out of somebody, especially when it comes to romantic feelings. Jesus??_.I hate it !!! Not to mention the fact, that the way I see it, he is the man, BE ONE and do something about the situation and not just beat around the bush. If you want it, go and get it??_I guess that's why I always have been attracted to fire sign guys.
Maybe you should give his a clear indication of how you feel. After all, there is nothing to lose really??_well ok, with the exception of the pride thing of course, but hey, if you don't try, you won't know !!!
LOOOOOOL... omg omggg omgg.. i completelyy one hundred percent agree with you 😄...
i think thst he probably wants to kill me too though out of frustration.. but then i do see it the same way as you ...that the guy should do the chasing...and when i say this to my friendss they always say ... don't be silly its not the oldern times... but then whats the point if theres not dividing line between the guy and the girll..and we all end up acting the same... i don't like or understand those girls that think its okay to smother this guy and fall over themselves trying to get his attention...thats the way he makes it sound anyway lol
i'm a weird one though lol.. i think fire signs are too in your face and i dont like that either.. i'll b more like back off
and yes MY PRIDE always comes first no matter what anyone sayss haha
by the way i did message him yestreday trying to see what happened to that girl of his..as in the one he met up with
i said how is she..he said i dont talk to her anymore... i said well theres plenty more people out there..and he goes...
just for your information..she is not my girl...and i didn't do anything with her lol
i was like ok steady on lolll
Posted by ElusiveSoul
LOL candy??_.I can completely understand where you??re coming from tho. I hate finding myself in a predicament where you —have to?? force an answer out of somebody, especially when it comes to romantic feelings. Jesus??_.I hate it !!! Not to mention the fact, that the way I see it, he is the man, BE ONE and do something about the situation and not just beat around the bush. If you want it, go and get it??_I guess that's why I always have been attracted to fire sign guys.
Maybe you should give his a clear indication of how you feel. After all, there is nothing to lose really??_well ok, with the exception of the pride thing of course, but hey, if you don't try, you won't know !!!
LOOOOOOL... omg omggg omgg.. i completelyy one hundred percent agree with you 😄...
i think thst he probably wants to kill me too though out of frustration.. but then i do see it the same way as you ...that the guy should do the chasing...and when i say this to my friendss they always say ... don't be silly its not the oldern times... but then whats the point if theres not dividing line between the guy and the girll..and we all end up acting the same... i don't like or understand those girls that think its okay to smother this guy and fall over themselves trying to get his attention...thats the way he makes it sound anyway lol
i'm a weird one though lol.. i think fire signs are too in your face and i dont like that either.. i'll b more like back off
and yes MY PRIDE always comes first no matter what anyone sayss haha
by the way i did message him yestreday trying to see what happened to that girl of his..as in the one he met up with
i said how is she..he said i dont talk to her anymore... i said well theres plenty more people out there..and he goes...
just for your information..she is not my girl...and i didn't do anything with her lol
i was like ok steady on lolll
Posted by lnana04Posted by ElusiveSoul
LOL candy??_.I can completely understand where you??re coming from tho. I hate finding myself in a predicament where you —have to?? force an answer out of somebody, especially when it comes to romantic feelings. Jesus??_.I hate it !!! Not to mention the fact, that the way I see it, he is the man, BE ONE and do something about the situation and not just beat around the bush. If you want it, go and get it??_I guess that's why I always have been attracted to fire sign guys.
Maybe you should give his a clear indication of how you feel. After all, there is nothing to lose really??_well ok, with the exception of the pride thing of course, but hey, if you don't try, you won't know !!!
"Not to mention the fact, that the way I see it, he is the man, BE ONE and do something about the situation and not just beat around the bush. If you want it, go and get it??_I guess that's why I always have been attracted to fire sign guys."
I'm like this too!!! I'm like come and claim me already lol! I like aggressive guys. Anything less I take as a sign that they are not that interested, even when they probably are.click to expand
@ both inana and elusive soul 😄.. you chicks are kool 🙂...
because i've been getting rants and lectures and sarcastic comments from everyone else..saying to me to stop playing games and stop being "coy"...and stop messing with this guys head...
but swear (on something important) lol.. that i don't do this intentionally... it just comes to me naturally... i don't know why or how... but everytime i speak it sounds like im not interested in him and im encouraging him to go for other girls lol..or that im being hot and cold myself...
im Definitely not "coy"... i am actually a really laid back / distant/reserved person when it comes to this stuff lol
i would never string anyone along intentionally 😢 😢...
the last thing i'd wanna do is upset this guy in any way :/
he just doesnt help the situation himself by constantly stating how attractive other people are...and how he is soo tempted to do things with them :s :/ lol... but he doesnt ..for whatever reason ..he doesnt tell me the reason :/
wouldnt you all say thats playing games? and blowing hot and cold...and messing with my head? lol not that he'd know it anyway..bu
heres the update...after the part where i txt him about his "girl"
[i messaged him sayin u know what its nothing to do with me what you do with that girl..its your business... then out of knowhere he starts saying so much to me,,,
he said do u want to be my friend with benefits? i said what? :O he said is that a yes.. i just said ur joking lol
and i said depends wht u mean and he goes .. it wud b nice..think about it
i said well if thats what ur looking for im sure u have plenty of girls u kno who wud b interested...
and then he goes i dont want them i want you :o :o :O :O :o, i want you badly..but the way he was saying it it sounded serious/ not serious coz he was making little jokes in btween
like what is that all about? y is he flirting / joking around with me like that ..because in all the years i'v known him we hardly do the flirting thing..and hes rarely said stuff lik tht to me b4 :O :s :/
and especially straight after telling me about his date :s
Posted by ElusiveSoul
Boy ohh boy??_.once again..those cap guys !!
Way I see it, he definitely is messing with your head. You??re not talking to the cap I know by any chance LOLOLOL !? Mine used to do the same in a subtle ways,??_ when I least expected it.I caught up on his tactics fairly quickly and never let him believe that I thought it was just a load of BS, but I also never responded to it emotionally. As matter a fact, just the other week, in the midst of our conversation he says to me —man, all those women are to greedy, they want me all to themselves—?_.my response — Oh, dear, I know exactly how it feels for I can relate. Sorry to hear that. Burden you and I gotta bare *shrug my shoulders*??
Regardless,??_ as conservative as I may be (referring to the earlier statement), I also am very liberal, however, as much as I believe any healthy friendship/relationship involves give and take 50/50, I still need to know that a man has a guts to go after what he desires. If it's me then be it so. It never appealed to me to do the running around after the guy, and as I mentioned with my cap, the whole little manipulation thing going on, making me to be the one who??s chasing him, is driving me insane and now even more stubborn to do right the opposite.
Playing games??_.yeah well, It does take two to tango, but he asked for it LOLOL
Going back to the friends with benefits scenario??_. conventional relationships are not my cup of tea and I would go bonkers if I had to be in one ( right now anyway ). Never the less, I don't understand how anyone can be FWB for it's implying that there is absolutely NO commitment to each other. I'm not saying it's a bad thing by far??_ different strokes for different strokes, just not for me. I have to know that there is at least that soul connection between my?? friend and a lover?? , and no matter where am I in the world, it is the loyalty to one another that's binding. I don't know if that makes any sense.
lol YOU KNOW WHAT i thought exactly the same thing when i read your statements about your man lol
im thinking hold on... it sounds like the guy i know!!!
awwwww u love your cappy dont u?? 😄... seems like u can't stop thinking about him hahhahah
trust me... within the space of a couple of days this guy has gone from getting me annoyed...when going on about his dates
to confusing me sooo m
confusing me soooooooooo much!!!!!!
where did thsat come from? that he wants me...no1 else and he wants me badly at that...he's never been so direct with me in the entire three years i'v known him...or maybe once
but its a rarity
so i dont kno whether to believe that he means what he says or not
how can he hav met that other girl only last week..and then tells me he feels this way about me noww
not only that where did he even get the courage to say that to me lol
where did thsat come from? that he wants me...no1 else and he wants me badly at that...he's never been so direct with me in the entire three years i'v known him...or maybe once
but its a rarity
so i dont kno whether to believe that he means what he says or not
how can he hav met that other girl only last week..and then tells me he feels this way about me noww
not only that where did he even get the courage to say that to me lol
Posted by capgirl75
It sounds like you are still beating around the bush. What do you want? Do you like, like him, like him, or do you just like him as a friend? LOL.
Obviously, he thinks more of you than just a friend.
I would just be direct with him. If you want to have a romantic relationship with him, you have to find a way to tell him that. I would say no to the friends with benefits thing either way.
I've gone here with a friend of mine- he was always saying stuff like that, but he made it clear he didn't want to be my boyfriend, so I told him, we can be friends or we can have a romantic relationship, but we can't do FWB. So we are just friends. I laid it out there that bluntly. And I think that's what you are going to have to do. Make it clear that he has to choose one or the other. He can't have his cake and eat it too.
oh no way am i going to do a fwb thing
but..what i dont get is last week he went on a date with another chick..and now hes like i want u so badly lol
plus in the last year he said hes not in to messing around
he just wants a relationship and then wants to get engaged then married
and he's been rejecting all these other girls that clearly want fwb and hes said no to them
and he knows im not like that either
i think it just came from ..my joke about him and that girl..because i messaged him the previous day sayin so how is ur girl...he said she isnt my girl
and i said well shes your friend with additonal benefits then
so he used that but on me... saying do u want to be mine? and i was thinking wth... i thought u dont want that kind of sleazy relationship anywayyy
i told him he can get it from anywhere...there arent a shortage of girls
but he goes its u i want :o :O
Posted by capgirl75Posted by candy10
confusing me soooooooooo much!!!!!!
where did thsat come from? that he wants me...no1 else and he wants me badly at that...he's never been so direct with me in the entire three years i'v known him...or maybe once
but its a rarity
so i dont kno whether to believe that he means what he says or not
how can he hav met that other girl only last week..and then tells me he feels this way about me noww
not only that where did he even get the courage to say that to me lol
Maybe he just was seeing other people because he (as i said in an earlier post) does not think you are interested in him that way. Maybe this whole time he has liked and wanted to be with you but he does not get clear signals from you. Maybe when you brought up the other girl, he finally thought, "Damn! Could she be jealous? Does she want to be with me?" So now he brings it up in a joking manner to see what you will say.click to expand
😄 omg thats wt i'v bn thinking i said the sme thing to my friend... becoz straight after i said... u know what its not my business what u and that girl do...
and woooooshhh he was like so do u want to b my fwb? lollll
woooooooooowwwwwwww his hearts set on me ...hmm intresting... i actually dont have doubts anymore... iv got advice from like a million people...and they all say the same thing 😄..that he only likes me lol
Posted by capgirl75
Maybe he doesn't like the other girls because his heart is set on you! lol.
AAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWHHHHHHHHHHH
as usualy i dont think i reacted exactly how he wanted lolllllll.. i was refraining myself from sayin anything too bold lol
i just said no u dont....
u got other optionsss so why me loll
but ill wait to see what he says next on the phone or something after that awkward messaging convo lol 😄
Posted by capgirl75Posted by capgirl75
Yes, but what do you want? Just tell him what you want.
he said: do u want to be my friend with benefits?
you said: what? :O
he said: is that a yes..
you said: ur joking lol
then you said: depends wht u mean.
he said: it wud b nice..think about it
you said: well if thats what ur looking for im sure u have plenty of girls u kno who wud b interested...
he said: i dont want them i want you :o :o :O :O :o, i want you badly..
so now, you say:
a) Look, you are a good friend but I really am not interested in having any kind of romantic relationship with you.
OR
b) I would not feel comfortable being FWB. I really like you...now, if you're asking if I will be your GIRLFRIEND, then that is another question entirely
OR
c) Gee, I really like you but no way do I want to have a purely sexual relationship with you! If you want to try having a relationship, then let's see where this goes, we're already such good friends.
or any number of honest responses.
did you miss this one? lol.click to expand
lol i didnt c that
i clearly missed it lol
i think i like option c... but the near future... not quite now lol
lol i did tell him ages ago i dnt want a relationship now.. but i dont think he got that lol
or he consciously decided to forget aboiut it hahah
what would u dooooooooooo 😄
This is a ball of confusion.
candy10, you remind me of myself a bit.
All you probably want is for the ball to be in your court. You want him to come out and say how much he likes you, so you can have the control over things and decide what YOU want to do, which will most likely be turning him down.
girly, I can tell you now. you are going to end up playing yourself real hard.
if you don't see yourself with him, then don't pretend. if you want him, go get him. the grey area will get you hurt.
All you probably want is for the ball to be in your court. You want him to come out and say how much he likes you, so you can have the control over things and decide what YOU want to do, which will most likely be turning him down.
girly, I can tell you now. you are going to end up playing yourself real hard.
if you don't see yourself with him, then don't pretend. if you want him, go get him. the grey area will get you hurt.
Posted by capgirl75
I would be honest completely. But you are saying here that you don't want a relationship now. I think that means that you are not interested. You can't expect him to wait around for you, even though it seems he has. He has left the ball in your court, in this conversation. You have to accept or reject his advances.
You can say, "I like you, but the timing on this is not right for me. I honestly don't want to be in a relationship now, sexual or otherwise." But, he is going to think that you are letting him down easy and he is going to wonder why you are playing these games with him.
You can say that or choice a, either way, it is the same. You are then making it clear that you are not interested in anything but friendship at this time.
He's not going to beg you to go out with him. this is why he's being vague. He kind of knows you are not interested, but you send him mixed signals. So, he is confused.
After all of this, why don't you want to be in a relationship? You don't have to answer me, but it's something you can answer for yourself, and maybe you can include this in your conversation with him.
omg so after the long long long long text conversation..he called me a few hours later..but i'm busy with family stuff so cudnt speak to him
and i messaged him saying i can't talk now and did tell him the reason.. he then said DON'T TAKE WHAT I SAID TO HEART...
because i was only messing around before...
now thas good because it means... he don't see me as just any girl who he can have a FRIENDS WITH BENEFIT thing with
but bad because it came out of nowhere and we've never had a txt convo so long where he messes about this much..and actually says i WANT YOU...and then to come out and say i didnt mean it
its like what?
Posted by lnana04
candy10, you remind me of myself a bit.
All you probably want is for the ball to be in your court. You want him to come out and say how much he likes you, so you can have the control over things and decide what YOU want to do, which will most likely be turning him down.
girly, I can tell you now. you are going to end up playing yourself real hard.
if you don't see yourself with him, then don't pretend. if you want him, go get him. the grey area will get you hurt.
forget what i want for now... ill let u guys know what it is in a bit
but i just want to focus on him at this moment...
why did he say what he did all of that? > > >
after the long long long long text conversation..he called me a few hours later..but i'm busy with family stuff so cudnt speak to him
and i messaged him saying i can't talk now and did tell him the reason.. he then said DON'T TAKE WHAT I SAID TO HEART...
because i was only messing around before...
now thas good because it means... he don't see me as just any girl who he can have a FRIENDS WITH BENEFIT thing with
but bad because it came out of nowhere and we've never had a txt convo so long where he messes about this much..and actually says i WANT YOU...and then to come out and say i didnt mean it
its like what?
Posted by capgirl75
he said that because when he called you, you didn't want to talk to him.
so u think he meant all that stuff he said?? and just thought i got angry or was avoiding him?
Posted by candy10Posted by lnana04
candy10, you remind me of myself a bit.
All you probably want is for the ball to be in your court. You want him to come out and say how much he likes you, so you can have the control over things and decide what YOU want to do, which will most likely be turning him down.
girly, I can tell you now. you are going to end up playing yourself real hard.
if you don't see yourself with him, then don't pretend. if you want him, go get him. the grey area will get you hurt.
forget what i want for now... ill let u guys know what it is in a bit
but i just want to focus on him at this moment...
why did he say what he did all of that? > > >
after the long long long long text conversation..he called me a few hours later..but i'm busy with family stuff so cudnt speak to him
and i messaged him saying i can't talk now and did tell him the reason.. he then said DON'T TAKE WHAT I SAID TO HEART...
because i was only messing around before...
now thas good because it means... he don't see me as just any girl who he can have a FRIENDS WITH BENEFIT thing with
but bad because it came out of nowhere and we've never had a txt convo so long where he messes about this much..and actually says i WANT YOU...and then to come out and say i didnt mean it
its like what?click to expand
Forget what you want for now?
I'm not about to sit up here and type away wasting my time picking his brain, or text messages, apart for possibly no reason but an ego boost for you lol.
I'm like him now lol.
Posted by lnana04Posted by candy10Posted by lnana04
candy10, you remind me of myself a bit.
All you probably want is for the ball to be in your court. You want him to come out and say how much he likes you, so you can have the control over things and decide what YOU want to do, which will most likely be turning him down.
girly, I can tell you now. you are going to end up playing yourself real hard.
if you don't see yourself with him, then don't pretend. if you want him, go get him. the grey area will get you hurt.
forget what i want for now... ill let u guys know what it is in a bit
but i just want to focus on him at this moment...
why did he say what he did all of that? > > >
after the long long long long text conversation..he called me a few hours later..but i'm busy with family stuff so cudnt speak to him
and i messaged him saying i can't talk now and did tell him the reason.. he then said DON'T TAKE WHAT I SAID TO HEART...
because i was only messing around before...
now thas good because it means... he don't see me as just any girl who he can have a FRIENDS WITH BENEFIT thing with
but bad because it came out of nowhere and we've never had a txt convo so long where he messes about this much..and actually says i WANT YOU...and then to come out and say i didnt mean it
its like what?
Forget what you want for now?
I'm not about to sit up here and type away wasting my time picking his brain, or text messages, apart for possibly no reason but an ego boost for you lol.
I'm like him now lol.click to expand
LOLLL..
well im obviously asking for a reason..haha..im not just asking for an ego boost... i could get that in many other ways lol
so yes u could say if you can pick his brain for me and tell me what he is thinking..and it is positive... then i'll b glad lol
now back to him lol... why did he say all the last bits ? and then say he is jokin lol
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He messaged asking me to listen to a song and tell him what i think, so i was thinking thats unusual again..because he's never bothered enough to message me normall about music lol.. so then i listened to the song and i was like :O.. is he trying to tell me something. to me the words practically described our situation.
the words are : baby i've known you for a long long time, i never thought that we would find, what we are holding in our hands, lately i've been thinking i should make you mine, been thinking that we should define what we are, you know i like to be in control but recently i don't know what to do i'm losing it over you,
we both feel the same, and i can't play this game any longer
girl i think about you all of the time, wondering how im going to make you mine,so many things ive been wanting to say, held in my heart for a day like today, i want to hold you till the light fades away..
thats the basic jist of the song...
so after he messaged me asking me to tell him what i think... i said i would listen to it later.... and then that very same day he did ring me again... before i'd even messaged him anything back about it..because i was confusedd.. as to whether he was trying to tell me something... or whether i was thinking to much in to it
so i rang him back a few days later.... and he didnt mention it again ... so i thought i would... i said yes so about that song... its not your normal type of song that you like (i didn't wanna be too obvious).. i was just trying to find out his reasons for asking me to listen to it.. and he said not really...BUT I REALLY LIKE THE WORDS....i said ok kool.. and that was it end of.... he didnt even ask me my opinion of it or anything more...
This was what he hinted to me ONLY a couple of months ago