krysrenee7
@krysrenee7
17 Years5,000+ Posts
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Am I the ONLY one?
I hate text messages in general. So many of my texts have came across the wrong way to people because they can not hear the tone of voice im saying it in. I much prefer face to face communucation. I am very bad on the phone too!
Also texting gives people far to long to respond (while they work out what to say what they think you want them too?). And the whole "sorry i didnt text back my phone was on silent" which usually means they had something better to do lol
Also texting gives people far to long to respond (while they work out what to say what they think you want them too?). And the whole "sorry i didnt text back my phone was on silent" which usually means they had something better to do lol
For me personally, I don't do phone conversations well, and this just isn't with boys. It's in general. That doesn't mean I'm also have issues in face-to-face conversation. I prefer getting to know people upfront and in person, but I'm the kind of person who doesn't really care to have a phone conversation. I usually don't have time for it. My thing is, unless you're calling to tell me something important or relay information to me (this is too long to put in text), then I don't care for other things that can be said in person or in text. I can only speak to certain people for a longer length of time without getting bored or feeling a little pressed/awkward, but I usually keep my phone conversations to around 30 min or less. I articulate myself better in written words, so texting is a little easier for me.
I don't HATE phone conversations, I will pick up the phone if people call me and I'm not very tired or busy, but for the most part, I stick to texts or talk to the person face to face.
I don't HATE phone conversations, I will pick up the phone if people call me and I'm not very tired or busy, but for the most part, I stick to texts or talk to the person face to face.
@Can: Well it sounds like you're the kind of person that has to know somebody VERY well before you become a phone-a-holic. I'm like that. And I feel that way too, just the opposite (I hate texting) b/c I feel a person has a better chance of getting me to open up if I can actually HEAR their voice.
Now don't get me wrong, a few short texts every now & then saying sweet things OR important things is 1 thing; I don't mind those.
It's these conversations that I hate:
GUY: "Hey"
ME: "Hi"
GUY: "What's up?"
ME: (Tells guy about my day)
GUY: (No response) OR (Gives me 1-word response)
UGH! I hate 1 word responses, especially if we're discussing something that requires a "THOROUGH" response.
I also hate texting my heart out only to realize that person all of the sudden stops texting.
Plus, what might take 30 minutes for someone to communicate on text message might only take up about 5 seconds to say over the phone.
I don't like long drawn out conversations on the phone either BUT if me & a man are really connecting/vibing, I'd feel more comfortable vibing with him in PERSON moreso than anything.
I hate having FULL fledged conversations over text message. The way I see it, if a person is THAT busy that they can't talk on the phone or meet me in person they PROBABLY SHOULDN'T be dating ANYONE! I refuse to get to know someone primarily by way of text message.
Now don't get me wrong, a few short texts every now & then saying sweet things OR important things is 1 thing; I don't mind those.
It's these conversations that I hate:
GUY: "Hey"
ME: "Hi"
GUY: "What's up?"
ME: (Tells guy about my day)
GUY: (No response) OR (Gives me 1-word response)
UGH! I hate 1 word responses, especially if we're discussing something that requires a "THOROUGH" response.
I also hate texting my heart out only to realize that person all of the sudden stops texting.
Plus, what might take 30 minutes for someone to communicate on text message might only take up about 5 seconds to say over the phone.
I don't like long drawn out conversations on the phone either BUT if me & a man are really connecting/vibing, I'd feel more comfortable vibing with him in PERSON moreso than anything.
I hate having FULL fledged conversations over text message. The way I see it, if a person is THAT busy that they can't talk on the phone or meet me in person they PROBABLY SHOULDN'T be dating ANYONE! I refuse to get to know someone primarily by way of text message.
As I'm getting older, I'm noticing that alot more men aren't as comfortable with talking for long periods of time over the phone. They all seem to be either 1. Down for texting all day OR 2. Want to skip the small talk & see me face to face.
Things aren't like they used to be. When I was growing up & in high school, it was normal for men & women to talk on the phone all day & night & for HOURS! Now, people use text messaging b/c of it's conveinance; and that's understandable. BUT those very same men didn't have an issue talking over the phone before text messaging became a big hit either! So I really don't buy the whole, "I'm SUPER busy" lines that often b/c I know personally that we all make time for what we WANNA make time for.
What bothers me is when I tell a man UP FRONT that I'd prefer text messaging NOT be our usual form of contact, & yet they do it anyway! Awhile ago, I told a gentlemen this right after I'd given him my number. He not only waited a week to contact me BUT he had the nerve to TEXT me even though I'd asked him NOT to!
Plus, I'm not gonna lie (this may sound selfish), but I feel that a person is most likely to explain why the convo has to be cut short when you're talking to them over the phone vs. text message. When you're on the phone with someone, they always tell you when they can't talk any longer AND they usually tell you why. But oh boy, people are diff. when it comes to texting. They'll just stop texting MID CONVERSATION w/o any pre-warning or excuse! RUDE!
Things aren't like they used to be. When I was growing up & in high school, it was normal for men & women to talk on the phone all day & night & for HOURS! Now, people use text messaging b/c of it's conveinance; and that's understandable. BUT those very same men didn't have an issue talking over the phone before text messaging became a big hit either! So I really don't buy the whole, "I'm SUPER busy" lines that often b/c I know personally that we all make time for what we WANNA make time for.
What bothers me is when I tell a man UP FRONT that I'd prefer text messaging NOT be our usual form of contact, & yet they do it anyway! Awhile ago, I told a gentlemen this right after I'd given him my number. He not only waited a week to contact me BUT he had the nerve to TEXT me even though I'd asked him NOT to!
Plus, I'm not gonna lie (this may sound selfish), but I feel that a person is most likely to explain why the convo has to be cut short when you're talking to them over the phone vs. text message. When you're on the phone with someone, they always tell you when they can't talk any longer AND they usually tell you why. But oh boy, people are diff. when it comes to texting. They'll just stop texting MID CONVERSATION w/o any pre-warning or excuse! RUDE!
I don't text... almost ever. When I am part of a conversation there is so much more than words to see/hear. Face-to-face is definitely best. I get to hear the tone of voice and read body language and facial expressions. I can talk on the phone like a teenage girl but only with a few people. I talked with a buddy of mine from MD for about three hours yesterday, everything from his parents to my kids to mocking our recent exes.
I don't like e-mail or forums really either. Written words can be so impersonal. E-mailing and forums give some space at least so I can try to clarify what I am saying. The problem with texting is that they are generally too short to really get anything across and too many people don't even write full words let alone complete thoughts.
I do have one good friend who I made through emailing at first. We spent a few days at work emailing back and forth. I don't think either of us did much work that week. When we finally met for lunch it was like we'd known each other for years. We worked very close together so I could pick her up at lunch and we'd just hang out and talk for an hour. She was late going back every time.
I don't like e-mail or forums really either. Written words can be so impersonal. E-mailing and forums give some space at least so I can try to clarify what I am saying. The problem with texting is that they are generally too short to really get anything across and too many people don't even write full words let alone complete thoughts.
I do have one good friend who I made through emailing at first. We spent a few days at work emailing back and forth. I don't think either of us did much work that week. When we finally met for lunch it was like we'd known each other for years. We worked very close together so I could pick her up at lunch and we'd just hang out and talk for an hour. She was late going back every time.
Posted by krysrenee7
Am I the ONLY 1 who hates for someone to use TEXT MESSAGING as a means to 1. Get to know me (in the beginning stages of dating) and/or 2. As the MAIN form of communication/contact?
Text messaging when you can't particularly make a phone call (busy at work, around lots of people, etc. for example) text messaging is understandable/ok sometimes.
BUT
There is nothing MORE annoying than to meet a guy who prefers texting over talking on the phone or hanging out face to face.
I'm old-skool. I believe in originality. I believe that text messaging sometimes takes the genuieness out of general conversation.
1. It's hard sometimes to know HOW someone is saying some things over texts. (Example: If someone texts me to "shut up" it'd be hard to know the proper context they used vs. persay me hearing a person--over the phone OR in person--say the exact same phrase.
2. If a person seems to hesitate/avoid speaking to me directly, this will spark my SUSPICIONS. After all, men who are secretely TAKEN already OR who have something to hide generally prefer text message the same way crooks prefer the internet to carry out their intentions.
3. Although I understand that we're not in high school anymore & that hours on the phone with someone isn't always possible (school, work, kids, etc.), I believe that conversations are NEVER as long or in dept when had over text message vs. the way they are over the phone OR in person.
4. I don't believe it's appropriate to have CERTAIN conversations through text messaging (like breaking up OR professing love for the 1st time for example).
What do you guys think!?!
A-men.
You said it all! I am very old-school myself, although very young, and I loathe texting with a passion.
if we cannot meet to talk face to face then call me - DONT start the silly text-messaging, it can get two responses from me,
a. leave me indifferent (will respond, WHEN i see it - usually i dont even check my cell or know where i left it the last time - and a very curt, to the point response
b. annoy me to no end if you make a habit out of it
No time to meet/call me---> ignore mode ON
Distasteful and boring.
I am so over texting .I put my phone on airplane mode sometimes to avoid useless texts.
Posted by krysrenee7
@Can: Well it sounds like you're the kind of person that has to know somebody VERY well before you become a phone-a-holic. I'm like that. And I feel that way too, just the opposite (I hate texting) b/c I feel a person has a better chance of getting me to open up if I can actually HEAR their voice.
Yeah, that's pretty much it, lol. I don't like to carry long conversations with people I don't know very well; I know it seems ironic, considering a phone conversation would be a good way to alleviate that, but it just doesn't suit me. When I was dating a Gemini early in the summer, he obviously liked to talk, but early when we were getting to know each other, he randomly called me. I ALMOST didn't answer, but I decided to give him a chance. It turned out alright only because he did most of the talking, so I was able to pick points where I could interject, make my own comments, and connect to the conversation. But usually, for me to want to stay on the phone for a while, you'd need to really be a good conversationalist. This doesn't mean I outright hate phone conversations; you really just have to call me when I'm in the right mood. When they go well, I do love phone calls.
Also, about the texting, I actually don't mind the dropped text. I'm that kind of person who is like, "Unless we're super close, you have something to say, or I'm just in a good mood" I don't feel like talking much. I just go into these moods where I don't want to talk outright to people unless it's face to face or I'm feeling up to it. I'm strange like that, but conversation to me can be somewhat selective in all mediums depending on how talkative and extroverted I feel.
Oh, also note, the only time I get upset over a dropped text is when I text important information and need and answer soon. But usually I'll call before hand unless I'm in a situation where I can't call. So, that's how I usually work.
I'm not a fan of calling and I'm not comfortable texting those I don't know well.
Posted by LibraSid
I don't like e-mail or forums really either. Written words can be so impersonal. E-mailing and forums give some space at least so I can try to clarify what I am saying. The problem with texting is that they are generally too short to really get anything across and too many people don't even write full words let alone complete thoughts.
My point exactly! I got a text yesterday that said, "Btw, I might want to G.O.L. so L.M.K. what's up." As you can imagine, I thought I was seeing things OR that the person texting me was obviously drunk. Instead of racking my brain & trying to text the person back to see what on EARTH they were talking about or using "code" for I just picked up the phone & within 2 seconds (LITERALLY), I found out that all my friend was trying to say the whole time was, "By the way, I might want to Go Out Later so Let Me Know what's up." The time it took me to simply pick up the phone & hear this took WAY shorter time/confusion than that text did.
And yeah I've established friendships with people over the internet primarily. BUT, hell EVENTUALLY we changed over to either talking on the phone or being face to face to talk. Hell, even people who engage in ONLINE DATING EVENTUALLY prefer to hear that person's voice OR meet them in person; even people who choose to date via the internet even expect for a more original form of communication to take place after a certain point. BUT, to continue just emailing someone all day & long, knowing GOOD & damn well we both have telephones (or cars to get to eachother) is pointless & annoying.
Another thing I can't stand about texting: When I get a 6 page text from a friend who is upset. The reason this bothers me? Obviously if someone has enough time to sit & focus on a page of that length, they're probably not "busy" or unable to pick up a phone to just call me! Oh the RAGE I feel when my ringtone goes off SIX different times within the span of 30 seconds! It drives me crazy!
Plus, while it's understandable that texting is more CONVEINANT for people who are perhaps busy at work, school, with friends or family, etc. it's also EXTREMELY RUDE & sometimes inappropriate for someone to engage in taking the focus off of what they're "SO BUSY" doing (the reason they couldn't call or talk face to face) just to send a text!
Texting has gotten people fired! TEXTING WHILE DRIVING has ruined/killed lives! Texting while on a date OR while in the company of others is considered VERY RUDE & has even strained relationships/friendships.
A person may see it as "CONVEINANT" to text me while they're at work instead of taking the risk of being punished by their bosses by calling me. BUT I'm sure employees texting is not considered "CONVEINANT" to the EMPLOYER! If a person is THAT busy that they can hardly ever talk to me on the phone or meet face to face with me, they're better off NOT contacting me AT ALL OR atleast until their "busy" schedule dies down a little!
I can't tell you how many times I've been out with friends OR out on a date when the other person was texting in front of me! It's 1 thing to send 1 or 2 short texts of importance while out with me, BUT it's another thing to continually stare DOWNWARD at your phone the entire time. The signal that sends to me when someone does that? It sends the signal that MY TIME is NOT nearly as important as the person they are texting; and if that's the case, they could've spared me & let me stay home...OR simply just called that person instead of continually offending me.
Text messaging DOES come in handy sometimes, BUT people take this "conveinance" thing a little TOO far sometimes. And hey, if the message is THAT important or THAT much of an emergency, I'd rather them spare themselves of finger cramps (from texting) & just calling me vs. spending 2 minutes typing something on a phone they could've verbally told me in 2 seconds.
And I'm NOT even gonna get on the people to break up with people via text! Oh man, that is the TACKIEST thing I've ever heard! Supposedly there's a company out in California that sends text messages to a person's phone, breaking up with them when their partner(who paid for the service) no longer wants to be with them! PATHETIC!
Texting has gotten people fired! TEXTING WHILE DRIVING has ruined/killed lives! Texting while on a date OR while in the company of others is considered VERY RUDE & has even strained relationships/friendships.
A person may see it as "CONVEINANT" to text me while they're at work instead of taking the risk of being punished by their bosses by calling me. BUT I'm sure employees texting is not considered "CONVEINANT" to the EMPLOYER! If a person is THAT busy that they can hardly ever talk to me on the phone or meet face to face with me, they're better off NOT contacting me AT ALL OR atleast until their "busy" schedule dies down a little!
I can't tell you how many times I've been out with friends OR out on a date when the other person was texting in front of me! It's 1 thing to send 1 or 2 short texts of importance while out with me, BUT it's another thing to continually stare DOWNWARD at your phone the entire time. The signal that sends to me when someone does that? It sends the signal that MY TIME is NOT nearly as important as the person they are texting; and if that's the case, they could've spared me & let me stay home...OR simply just called that person instead of continually offending me.
Text messaging DOES come in handy sometimes, BUT people take this "conveinance" thing a little TOO far sometimes. And hey, if the message is THAT important or THAT much of an emergency, I'd rather them spare themselves of finger cramps (from texting) & just calling me vs. spending 2 minutes typing something on a phone they could've verbally told me in 2 seconds.
And I'm NOT even gonna get on the people to break up with people via text! Oh man, that is the TACKIEST thing I've ever heard! Supposedly there's a company out in California that sends text messages to a person's phone, breaking up with them when their partner(who paid for the service) no longer wants to be with them! PATHETIC!
Personally, texting does nothing but get me into big trouble. Not only do I say things that are taken the wrong way when I don't mean anything by them but it is too easy to type something you might not ever say otherwise like I did last night. Once again, the stupid things I do. And really, can't say I can blame it on the phone but it sure doesn't help matters.
Posted by crzydiam63
Personally, texting does nothing but get me into big trouble. Not only do I say things that are taken the wrong way when I don't mean anything by them but it is too easy to type something you might not ever say otherwise like I did last night. Once again, the stupid things I do. And really, can't say I can blame it on the phone but it sure doesn't help matters.
True. I've noticed that ever since this "information technology" era really took off, alot of people get BALLS when using NON-formal/direct forms of communication. Some people grow an EXTRA SET OF BALLS the minute they don't have to face someone directly. I think this is another reason why the "BULLYING" epidemic has really taken off. It's not to say that people when talking over the phone or in person are always genuine, BUT it's ALOT easier for someone to be LESS genuine when they aren't facing that person head on.
I have a very strong & non-chalant personality. I'm known in my circle for being very blunt & for having a sense of humor that is considered "outside of the box," sometimes. So when I'm just simply "being myself" to someone who doesn't really REALLY know me all that well, alot of what I say (good or bad) is often taken the wrong way. Text messaging isn't for people with certain personalities lol OR for people who have trouble transferring their thoughts onto paper/screen.
Posted by cancersunleomoon123
i don't mind it. i'm young and it's the way people are nowadays. 🙂 I honestly don't prefer the phone until i get to know someone a little better.
True. I'm the same way. I'm a great conversationalist, BUT event hough I personally can think of 1 million things to talk about with someone, I go into every new situation with a guy assuming that going inch by inch to get to know someone is the best way to go. And since people are often so guarded when you 1st meet them, it's hard for 2 people to talk about EVERYTHING/for long periods of time UNLESS they've established some level of comfort with them already.
I don't mind text messaging SOMETIMES, no diff. than I don't mind emailing someone or facebooking them, AS LONG AS text messaging isn't the ONLY form of communication I have with someone. Hell, I'd be JUST AS aggravated if someone I always saw face to face never wanted to communicate with me in any other way other than
I think it's all about moderation. Text sometimes. Email sometimes. Meet face to face sometimes. Talk on the phone sometimes. DON'T talk at all sometimes lol. Everything should be all mixed up.
Posted by krysrenee7Posted by crzydiam63
Personally, texting does nothing but get me into big trouble. Not only do I say things that are taken the wrong way when I don't mean anything by them but it is too easy to type something you might not ever say otherwise like I did last night. Once again, the stupid things I do. And really, can't say I can blame it on the phone but it sure doesn't help matters.
click to expand
True. I've noticed that ever since this "information technology" era really took off, alot of people get BALLS when using NON-formal/direct forms of communication. Some people grow an EXTRA SET OF BALLS the minute they don't have to face someone directly. I think this is another reason why the "BULLYING" epidemic has really taken off. It's not to say that people when talking over the phone or in person are always genuine, BUT it's ALOT easier for someone to be LESS genuine when they aren't facing that person head on.
I have a very strong & non-chalant personality. I'm known in my circle for being very blunt & for having a sense of humor that is considered "outside of the box," sometimes. So when I'm just simply "being myself" to someone who doesn't really REALLY know me all that well, alot of what I say (good or bad) is often taken the wrong way. Text messaging isn't for people with certain personalities lol OR for people who have trouble transferring their thoughts onto paper/screen.
Posted by cancersunleomoon123Posted by krysrenee7Posted by cancersunleomoon123
i don't mind it. i'm young and it's the way people are nowadays. 🙂 I honestly don't prefer the phone until i get to know someone a little better.
True. I'm the same way. I'm a great conversationalist, BUT event hough I personally can think of 1 million things to talk about with someone, I go into every new situation with a guy assuming that going inch by inch to get to know someone is the best way to go. And since people are often so guarded when you 1st meet them, it's hard for 2 people to talk about EVERYTHING/for long periods of time UNLESS they've established some level of comfort with them already.
I don't mind text messaging SOMETIMES, no diff. than I don't mind emailing someone or facebooking them, AS LONG AS text messaging isn't the ONLY form of communication I have with someone. Hell, I'd be JUST AS aggravated if someone I always saw face to face never wanted to communicate with me in any other way other than
I think it's all about moderation. Text sometimes. Email sometimes. Meet face to face sometimes. Talk on the phone sometimes. DON'T talk at all sometimes lol. Everything should be all mixed up.
agreed.click to expand
I agree with this too. It should be a mixed bag.
Trying to get to know me through "texting" is about AS ANNOYING as when a man writes me on facebook, asking for my number BEFORE he even knows anything about me other than my name! I can't stand it when someone tries to get to know me pre-maturely or "skip" over the normal dating process! If a man is too chicken to have a phone or face to face conversation with me & if his priority is "CONVEINANCE," I'm NOT the 1 for him!
Posted by QLIbraMale
i don't mind texting, it beats listening to girls just breath on the phone or too busy watching lifetime to respond. i prefer talking but if i'm getting these responses i'll text your ass till you got words for me lol.
Well a woman not knowing how to hold an effective conversation sounds more like a communication problem all the way around. And texting her won't fix the communication problem. After all, a relationship can't function purely off of text messaging alone. Eventually 2 people will have to spend time together & communicate in person. And if someone has an issue/flaw in doing so then, screw texting them; I'd rather just find someone else who is a better communicator/conversator.
I mean I agree that literally hearing someone on the phone breath just for the sake of being on the phone is not cool at all. BUT if that's the case, just simply get off the phone with that person. Texting them won't erase the fact that the relationship lacks communication 101
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Text messaging when you can't particularly make a phone call (busy at work, around lots of people, etc. for example) text messaging is understandable/ok sometimes.
BUT
There is nothing MORE annoying than to meet a guy who prefers texting over talking on the phone or hanging out face to face.
I'm old-skool. I believe in originality. I believe that text messaging sometimes takes the genuieness out of general conversation.
1. It's hard sometimes to know HOW someone is saying some things over texts. (Example: If someone texts me to "shut up" it'd be hard to know the proper context they used vs. persay me hearing a person--over the phone OR in person--say the exact same phrase.
2. If a person seems to hesitate/avoid speaking to me directly, this will spark my SUSPICIONS. After all, men who are secretely TAKEN already OR who have something to hide generally prefer text message the same way crooks prefer the internet to carry out their intentions.
3. Although I understand that we're not in high school anymore & that hours on the phone with someone isn't always possible (school, work, kids, etc.), I believe that conversations are NEVER as long or in dept when had over text message vs. the way they are over the phone OR in person.
4. I don't believe it's appropriate to have CERTAIN conversations through text messaging (like breaking up OR professing love for the 1st time for example).
What do you guys think!?!