Going to the club with your S/O

Is it a good idea?

On 1 hand, what's the big deal? If you're both secure, trust eachother & DON'T have a hidden agenda, there shouldn't be a thing wrong with a couple enjoying themselves in the same club, whether they spend all night dancing with eachother or mingling with everyone else separately.

If you're a guy who looks forward to your girlfriend NOT being at the same club with you simply b/c you have sneaky motives, plan on betraying/disrespecting her, OR doing something that you know she wouldn't appreciate persay she were standing there, it's completely understandable why you'd be a little nervous to or shy away from clubbing with your partner.

However, it seems that alot of people think couples doing so is taboo. Why is that?

If you can have "fun" without your partner being there, why all of the sudden don't you believe you can have just as much "fun" with them actually being there with you?

My ex once told me, "I'd be kind of weird with you being at the same party with me. I'd feel weird if you walked past me while I was dancing with another girl. And if not, I feel that it'd just be trouble & uncomfortable." My response? Wowwww. I thought 2 people in love should be thrilled to 1. Be seen in public with eachother & 2. Have fun with eachother in public the same way it'd be fun if both people were out with their best friends/buddies.

Hmmm, maybe it's just me, but I don't see anything wrong with couples going out together.

Wow, called me old fashioned in this respect..but if my man and I were at a club, why the hell would he be dancing with anyone else but me?

I wouldn't understand that logic, I wouldn't understand why he'd be getting his groove on with other women when I'm right there..

Do other couples really do that? Go to the club and split up, go holla at other people and then meet back up at five...if they get offer numbers do they take them? Are they trying to get random people to buy free drinks?

I just don't get it.

Posted by TheBeautifulStruggle
Wow, called me old fashioned in this respect..but if my man and I were at a club, why the hell would he be dancing with anyone else but me?

I wouldn't understand that logic, I wouldn't understand why he'd be getting his groove on with other women when I'm right there..

I'm 50/50 on this. On 1 hand, your man shouldn't stop doing anything that he normally does when you're NOT there, when you're actually there with him. The last thing I'd want is for my man to be 1 kind of person in front of me & another kind of person behind my back.

I don't see all the hype in why a man's version of "fun" always has to consist of him having physical contact (dancing) with other women, but hey some men justify it that it's "just dancing" & that nothing more ever comes of it, therefore they're not technically doing anything wrong.

I haven't even heard of this! Of course my husband and I go out together. We mingle with friends, but we don't pair off with other people! We dance together. What kind of club is this? My guy isn't the kind to be dancing up on some other woman- whether I'm there or not.

Posted by krysrenee7

I don't see all the hype in why a man's version of "fun" always has to consist of him having physical contact (dancing) with other women ....

You apparantly pick these type men because you used the word "always" ... just because you've experience a poor taste in men, doesn't mean the rest of us ladies pick men who lack integrity.

I agree with Whimsy and TBS. Going out together is one thing, separating to talk to other people of the opposite sex/flirting, is a horse of a different color. What's the point? Whats the point in going with your s/o if you are going to do that? Actually, the real question is what is the point in even having a s/o, if a person is still going to clubs to get numbers?

@P-Angel...For someone who doesn't even know my 1st or last name, you sure swear that you know me. And honey, I'm married. Happily. So let me fill you in on the FACTS: Me & my husband don't club & if/when we do, we have "fun" with eachother. Have I dated 1 bad apple in the past? Yep about 15 yrs ago. We all have. I'm not necessarily shocked that every frog in the past didn't turn into a prince. No shame in my game.

@Natural: I agree. I'm not completely against someone whose committed going out to a club/bar every blue moon, but I do think that you should act as if you're taken in ALL environments. Going to the club & seeing SINGLE (keyword) guys dancing with alot of girls doesn't give a man a "get out of jail free" card. Respect is respect, in front of or behind closed doors.

Posted by krysrenee7
If you can have "fun" without your partner being there, why all of the sudden don't you believe you can have just as much "fun" with them actually being there with you?

You shouldn't do anything differently whether your partner is there or not. If you wouldn't do it if they were standing there you shouldn't be doing it at all. If the fun you are having when they aren't there has to stop when they show up, you got some problems.

I'm not a dancer and don't go to clubs so I can't really speak to that part of it. But if my SO didn't want me to go somewhere with them because they'd have to behave... that wouldn't be my SO. Doing things together is kind of a basic of relationships. Of course it doesn't have to be everything but yes you better have fun together lol.

If my man is going out to the club without me, with friends, I would not care if he was dancing it up with some girl. I'm not there, I'm presuming he won't be unfaithful to me, and I don't think dancing is cheating. I dunno..maybe it is..but I never felt dancing whether freaky deaky or slow dancing is horrible enough to get me to question one's character..now, if i'm at the club with him, and he's bumping up on some girl, while I'm turning down guys left and right saying that I have a man. I'd be a bit pissed..I don't go to clubs to hook-up..I go to have fun, meet people, hang out, catch up with friends and dance(finding a guy at the end of the night has never been on my agenda).

And as much as I'd like to go to clubs to dance, I think it'd be very boring for me if my man wasn't with me. Being single and dancing with guys sucks. If we're having fun, the guy presumes that I want to take it further...if he doesn't know how to dance and he's basically grinding on me, it's gross...if I have a great conversation and we'd exchange numbers, the second meeting in the light, i don't know about you, but guys in dark rooms vs. guys in broad daylight look completely different.

Frankly, if i go to a club, if I don't see at least four people I know or make friends with another group to go to another club, or if the music completely sucks, I'd be wanting to go home with the quickness.

You know what I've always wanted to be in the club, the hot couple..do ya'll know what i'm talking about, those two gorgeous people sitting in the back or the ones that stay together and they get on the dancefloor and tear it up.

In my 'clubbing days' if I got bored, I'd do little things to amuse myself...Like I'd play impromptu wing-woman to a two-guy crew by themselves. Or if I saw a guy that asked a couple of women to dance and was turned down, I'd grab him and take him on the dancefloor. Or If I'm among a group of guy friends that are all wall-flowering and I'd do a variation of Tina Fey's dance from 30Rock to get them to stop mean-mugging and smile a bit.

I've even danced with a dude in a wheelchair.

*sigh* good times.

Posted by TheBeautifulStruggle
I don't go to clubs to hook-up..I go to have fun, meet people, hang out, catch up with friends and dance(finding a guy at the end of the night has never been on my agenda).
.

You said it exactly. There's this stigma out there that most people only go to the club to "network" with the opposite sex, if ya know what I mean. Granted, yes you're probably catching up with your real friends & having fun anyways WHILE "networking" but at the end of the day, the only difference b/w dancing/listening to music at home vs. going to the club IS hundreds of the opposite sex being there. So it's silly when people say that they don't go to the club for the opposite sex---oh yes they do.

That's why most men in bars/clubs are either single OR taken but yet coniving cheaters on the low. And there's a reason it's like that. Yes, faithful men go to clubs too, BUT 1. They're not there as often as the single guys & 2. They don't partake in the same "activities" that single men would, thus they don't go anyways b/c it's pointless to go to a place if you can't do what most of the people in that atmosphere are doing.

Posted by P-Angel

Posted by krysrenee7

I don't see all the hype in why a man's version of "fun" always has to consist of him having physical contact (dancing) with other women ....

You apparantly pick these type men because you used the word "always" ... just because you've experience a poor taste in men, doesn't mean the rest of us ladies pick men who lack integrity.

click to expand

And yet, in your defiant response to me, you never acknowledge the message, typical of you.


I will reiterate it then .... just because you have experienced a bad taste in men to use the word "always" doesn't mean the rest of us ladies pick men who lack integrity.


Not all men do that ..... but, you think so ... that speaks volumes, though that concept will escape your awareness.

Blah blah blah blah...anywho, moving on...