dreamingpisces
@dreamingpisces
15 YearsPisces
Comments: 1 · Posts: 300 · Topics: 35
look for love, or let love find you?
Well if everybody went by the "let it find you" mindset, NONE of us would ever find love, b/c we'd all be "waiting" on someone to approach us/find us 1st! So it's literally impossible for EVERYBODY to live by that mindset.
There's nothing wrong with looking for love as long as you do it in moderation AND for all the right reasons & at all the right places. Love is 1 of those things that people understandably want in life like they do money and/or a certain career, so there's nothing wrong with chasing after it/seeking love the same way you would other things you also want in life.
Problem is, so many people look for it in all the wrong places and/or for all the wrong reasons. Then some people are a little too desperate for it & of course to an outsider, this turns them off.
It's 2010. Women shouldn't be waiting all the time for a man to approach her; sometimes she should approach him 1st. If a woman wants love, she needs to put herself in the right atmosphere that attracts the kinds of men she wants vs. sitting at home & expecting "prince charming" to suddenly show up at her doorstep.
To an extent, each person HAS to put out SOMETHING in order to get love. There's NO such thing as sitting at home & randomly getting a knock at the door from prince charming. Looking for love can simply mean going out to a nice spot with your best smile/outfit on. Or it can mean getting on a dating website. When people say "looking for love" that doesn't LITERALLY mean standing outside & waiting on someone to pick you.
However, if love is an area you're NOT having much luck in, it's not that I think people should stop looking for it; no, I think they should just find other things in life they ALSO want so they can focus on those other things; if it's not meant for you to find a partner, you're supposed to distract yourself with other important things (money, education, career, kids, hobbies, etc.) & those things should keep you SO BUSY that you won't even realize how long it's taken you to find love.
There's nothing wrong with looking for love as long as you do it in moderation AND for all the right reasons & at all the right places. Love is 1 of those things that people understandably want in life like they do money and/or a certain career, so there's nothing wrong with chasing after it/seeking love the same way you would other things you also want in life.
Problem is, so many people look for it in all the wrong places and/or for all the wrong reasons. Then some people are a little too desperate for it & of course to an outsider, this turns them off.
It's 2010. Women shouldn't be waiting all the time for a man to approach her; sometimes she should approach him 1st. If a woman wants love, she needs to put herself in the right atmosphere that attracts the kinds of men she wants vs. sitting at home & expecting "prince charming" to suddenly show up at her doorstep.
To an extent, each person HAS to put out SOMETHING in order to get love. There's NO such thing as sitting at home & randomly getting a knock at the door from prince charming. Looking for love can simply mean going out to a nice spot with your best smile/outfit on. Or it can mean getting on a dating website. When people say "looking for love" that doesn't LITERALLY mean standing outside & waiting on someone to pick you.
However, if love is an area you're NOT having much luck in, it's not that I think people should stop looking for it; no, I think they should just find other things in life they ALSO want so they can focus on those other things; if it's not meant for you to find a partner, you're supposed to distract yourself with other important things (money, education, career, kids, hobbies, etc.) & those things should keep you SO BUSY that you won't even realize how long it's taken you to find love.
I believe its both patience and taking the initiative when its in the clear open. A little bit like this.
Here's what I think. If one goes looking for love then love is looking for someone. Thus, if everyone decides to not look for love then love can't find you.
Posted by QLIbraMalePosted by SeeingRed
Here's what I think. If one goes looking for love then love is looking for someone. Thus, if everyone decides to not look for love then love can't find you.
yeah but even if two people aren't looking for love, i believe destiny will make its way to both their hearts lol. and saying "everything happens for a reason gets born lol".click to expand
awww. aren't you the hopeless romantic 😉. :BEAR HUG:
I've never gone looking. I don't really think about it. I just do my thing and *POOF✨ it happens. I make efforts once a connection seems apparent but I don't go searching for it. Basically, I'm not one of those who go around signing up on dating sites, partake in "singles" anything, club/bar hop to meet men, etc. Not implying that any of those things are bad btw. I don't know why but it's like I've always had this intuitive feeling that it will just happen when it's supposed to.
Met 1st bf at school. Met 2nd because he was my friend's next door neighbor. Met my 3rd (current) one because he was my co-worker's band mate. I casually dated 2 others and it was through the music scene, being as I managed a band, that brought them to me. If you immerse yourself in activities/projects that you're passionate about that involve other people then you're bound to meet those you like and have common interests with.
Met 1st bf at school. Met 2nd because he was my friend's next door neighbor. Met my 3rd (current) one because he was my co-worker's band mate. I casually dated 2 others and it was through the music scene, being as I managed a band, that brought them to me. If you immerse yourself in activities/projects that you're passionate about that involve other people then you're bound to meet those you like and have common interests with.
Posted by Samiamascorpio
Every time I have focused on wanting a boyfriend I always end up with assholes but the moment I stop worrying about them and concentrate on myself a nice guy comes along and sweeps me off my feet 🙂
Yeah this seems to be the case. I think when people go out looking for love, you want it so bad that you are blind to the bad side of of the person. When love finds you, and your concentrating on yourself it takes that special person to make you be with them.
I think it's somewhere in between.
Looking for love doesn't work because you just can't do it. You cannot force it to happen. If you go out with the expectation or goal of finding the love of your life... you'll be disappointed. I know someone will say, "but I/my friend/my uncles cousins doctor/whatever found my guy/gal when I went looking"... good for you. No really, good for you. But that is not how it usually works. Even a broken clock is right twice a day. However, you can't shut down, get bitter, and just wait for that special person to find you and break down your walls. You have to be in a good place yourself... you know, happy, receptive. Then like Ninjamu said, POOF it just happens.
Live your life. Meet people. Make friends. Have fun.
I'm with QLM here too. Do your thing. Neither person has to be "looking" for cupid to strike.
Looking for love doesn't work because you just can't do it. You cannot force it to happen. If you go out with the expectation or goal of finding the love of your life... you'll be disappointed. I know someone will say, "but I/my friend/my uncles cousins doctor/whatever found my guy/gal when I went looking"... good for you. No really, good for you. But that is not how it usually works. Even a broken clock is right twice a day. However, you can't shut down, get bitter, and just wait for that special person to find you and break down your walls. You have to be in a good place yourself... you know, happy, receptive. Then like Ninjamu said, POOF it just happens.
Live your life. Meet people. Make friends. Have fun.
I'm with QLM here too. Do your thing. Neither person has to be "looking" for cupid to strike.
i was definitely looking for a boyfriend. 2008 was my searching year and man oh man, i dated 3 different capricorns but ended up with a gemini. i was so bored with my life and i wanted to meet new people, plus id been single for a long ass time
Posted by SamiamascorpioPosted by libra sunPosted by Samiamascorpio
Every time I have focused on wanting a boyfriend I always end up with assholes but the moment I stop worrying about them and concentrate on myself a nice guy comes along and sweeps me off my feet 🙂
Yeah this seems to be the case. I think when people go out looking for love, you want it so bad that you are blind to the bad side of of the person. When love finds you, and your concentrating on yourself it takes that special person to make you be with them.
Librasun where ya been— I've missed ya 🙂 maybe I should check out the Libra board every so often or something haha
click to expand
I've been out searching for love lol not really, but i'm slightly preoccupied with my new Cancer guy, but dont worry will take more then a man to keep me away! 🙂
Posted by SamiamascorpioPosted by libra sunPosted by SamiamascorpioPosted by libra sunPosted by Samiamascorpio
Every time I have focused on wanting a boyfriend I always end up with assholes but the moment I stop worrying about them and concentrate on myself a nice guy comes along and sweeps me off my feet 🙂
Yeah this seems to be the case. I think when people go out looking for love, you want it so bad that you are blind to the bad side of of the person. When love finds you, and your concentrating on yourself it takes that special person to make you be with them.
Librasun where ya been— I've missed ya 🙂 maybe I should check out the Libra board every so often or something haha
I've been out searching for love lol not really, but i'm slightly preoccupied with my new Cancer guy, but dont worry will take more then a man to keep me away! 🙂
Awww he has cancer well send my regards 😢 hehe just kidding. I don't know if I should be happy for you or jealous of him!!! (secretly plots to make him break up with you so I can keep you all to myself) you know us Scorpios can't be trusted for one second!!! Anyway I've got to have my coffee now, have a lovely weekend if I don't hear from you 🙂click to expand
I've actually had a scorp friend do that to me, so i'll be keeping my eye on you! lol but for now just hope you enjoyed your morning protein 😉
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