Men - What's it like for you in a relationship?

Curious to what thoughts men have and issues they face when they're in a committed relationship. I'm sure your experiences are different than women's and I'm curious about the things that go through your mind.

I'm going to post another topic on dating...this one is for established relationships.

Just spotted this one, Truecap. I have been watching your thread about dating, though.

I liked being married a lot. Of course, I was married for a long time, and for the majority of that time it was a very good thing. I had someone I could really trust. Someone I could really talk to. It was having the feeling that I could get feedback from my wife about everything from my clothes, to what should I do with my life. The long time we had spent together gave us a lot of commonality, and things to talk about. We had shared a lot of life together, and we could feel it. On the other hand, I am half convinced that this was one of the reasons that we finally broke up. She simply got tired of me.

Oh, don't say that dofacc!! It's not your fault, you know!

Thanks for responding. I was trying to get some insight to the male mind and give the guys a chance to share their opinions, vent frustrations, expound on their likes and dislikes in relationships.

Posted by dofacc
Just spotted this one, Truecap. I have been watching your thread about dating, though.

I liked being married a lot. Of course, I was married for a long time, and for the majority of that time it was a very good thing. I had someone I could really trust. Someone I could really talk to. It was having the feeling that I could get feedback from my wife about everything from my clothes, to what should I do with my life. The long time we had spent together gave us a lot of commonality, and things to talk about. We had shared a lot of life together, and we could feel it. On the other hand, I am half convinced that this was one of the reasons that we finally broke up. She simply got tired of me.

I can relate to the "got tired of" feeling. Wonder if it's just our experience or an Aries thing, haha.

"Yeah, they got tired of me and moved along..." But not just relationship wise, but generally. :/

Posted by tiziani
I'd love to comment but it's been long enough that I haven't been in a relationship now. I'm not really the voice of experience in that sense.

My longest relationship was five years and what I remember most was time commitments. It was balancing time given to my commitments and time given to us/her.


This had the biggest influence on how I saw her because... example - I could spend 2-4 hours driving back and forth on some days from work/college just to see her and spend time with her at her apartment at her request. And her reaction would be using that time to complain/point out what I wasn't doing for her.


At those moments I literally felt like I wanted to be any other place in the world but there.


It wasn't all bad though. I take the good things out of it. My point is really, you want someone who knows how to make the most of things/quality time together.

This is the problem when the girl forgets to focus on what he DOES do for her. If women had a better perception, then we would have been happier and more appreciative in our relationships.

I meant that to read *we would BE happier and more appreciative..."

I suppose past tense works too. 🙂

I just wish more men would contribute to the thread.

Posted by truecap
I just wish more men would contribute to the thread.

I've started to a few times but I'm no longer in a long term relationship. Each time, I start writing about how much I enjoyed marriage, then remember how it ended. Obviously what I liked so much had some major flaws in it.

"Wife" meant something to me. That was my woman, it's me and her against anyone else. I'm there for her, she's there for me. It's your friend and companion. You work, you play, you just go through it all together. We had jobs, kids, bills, all the stuff people get wrapped up in. I liked building the life together. Accomplishing goals, growing a family, traveling, making memories with one person and knowing they'd always be there. I've never been a high stress person and my marriage was the same. It was great while it lasted.

Now I wonder if the people saying to hold back and stay mysterious are right. If you really let someone all the way in like that you loose something in their eyes. She knows all your stories and jokes and thoughts...sometimes better than you. She's seen you hurt and upset. Predictable movies suck and it seems predictable people aren't any better.

Posted by LibraSid

Posted by truecap
I just wish more men would contribute to the thread.

I've started to a few times but I'm no longer in a long term relationship. Each time, I start writing about how much I enjoyed marriage, then remember how it ended. Obviously what I liked so much had some major flaws in it.

"Wife" meant something to me. That was my woman, it's me and her against anyone else. I'm there for her, she's there for me. It's your friend and companion. You work, you play, you just go through it all together. We had jobs, kids, bills, all the stuff people get wrapped up in. I liked building the life together. Accomplishing goals, growing a family, traveling, making memories with one person and knowing they'd always be there. I've never been a high stress person and my marriage was the same. It was great while it lasted.

Now I wonder if the people saying to hold back and stay mysterious are right. If you really let someone all the way in like that you loose something in their eyes. She knows all your stories and jokes and thoughts...sometimes better than you. She's seen you hurt and upset. Predictable movies suck and it seems predictable people aren't any better.

click to expand

I liked all that stuff too.

As far as remaining mysterious, I still think it's better to let someone in like that in marriage.