Rebounds

I used to think the men/women who merely served a purpose as being the "rebound" were never really relevant, until my ex married & walked off into the sunset with his rebound!

Am I happy for him? Well of course; hell I'm even married & have moved on by now

BUT I think it's quite intriging that growing up, women were always taught to never be intimidated by a man's rebound b/c there was always this short-term stigma attached to them. In other words, we're all taught not to sweat when our ex's get rebounds b/c it "probably won't work out." Welp, I'm learning that that's NOT true.

Granted, relationships that are rushed (especially out of desperation or for all the wrong reasons) don't usually last long, BUT whose to say that someone who just got out of a relationship isn't able/capable of finding another good catch 15 or 45 days later? It's def. possible!

They say most rebound situations don't work out but I'm starting to see alot of good/solid relationships working out now that initially started with 1 or both people being rebounds. I'm just saying, rebounds may be more competition than we think!

When a person knows how to seek, appreciate AND maintain a "good catch" there's no limits or "book" that dictates how fast 1 person will get over another. Not everybody needs 3+ years to "move on." Some people can quickly get back in the swing of things & start a completely new relationship with someone else, even though not alot of time has passed since their last relationship. Outsiders consider the new fling a "rebound" but hey, that's not always necessarily true! Sometimes the rebound ends up being the new wife!

Not everybody leaves a relationship feeling hurt, heartbroken and/or afraid to find new love again. Every break up isn't/wasn't a bad 1. Every relationship didn't necessarily contain 2 people who were so in love with eachother that moving on seemed/seems damn near impossible.

Some men/women are perfectly capable of moving on very quickly & finding new love again shortly after they just got out of a relationship.

If a person ALREADY had a good ability to seek out the RIGHT people, at the RIGHT time and for all the RIGHT reasons, they are perfectly capable of starting over & maintaining a good relationship with someone new.

Just b/c someone moves on quickly does NOT mean that they didn't have just as good of standards and/or the ability to pick the "right ones" shortly after a previous relationship just ended.

You never really know when another "good one" will walk into your life. And hey, sometimes life happens in a way that you'll meet all the "good ones" in clusters--or during the time you'd least expect. Some "good catches" come 30 days after you just got out of a relationship; not 1+ years later. And hey, to an extent, if you ever see a good thing, always try to snatch it up & save it, even if they come at a bad time.

I find it interesting that others can be so "offended" when their ex's actually had the balls/will-power to move on quickly. Granted, some only pretend to move on and/or get a "rebound" as just a replacement/distraction, BUT that's not always the case. With some people, the minute they leave a relationship & get their ish together (emotionally), they literally put themselves back on the market again & go about things as if they didn't just get out of a 10 year relationship! With some people you'd never be able to tell that they just got out of a 2+ year relationship.

I think it's easier for "rebound relationships" to be successful IF the last relationship ended on mutual/peaceful terms. Hell, half of what makes moving on so damn hard is NOT in us truly missing or needing that person, but instead b/c of all the drama that occured right before the relationship ended OR right after it ended. And if that's the case, it's no wonder some people can easily move on the minute past drama has finally ceased. It's b/c the actual person wasn't hard to move on from, but instead it was the emotional turmoil that any drama can cause that keeps them moving on. Smh

One of the things that I tell people about my break up is that the mourning occurred while I was still with my ex. When I was finally able to make the physical break, I no longer had much emotional baggage to sort through.

Of course, you and your ex lived through your experiences, and I did not. But still, ex may have been finished with the sadness, and was ready to move on when the time came.

^ LMFAO @ your avatar!!

^I am glad you enjoyed it so much.

What's not to enjoy? That's hilarious. 😄

I married my rebound, too. But, there was still the mourning period to go through, and I went through it while I was with my rebound. Awkward!

I never really understood that rebound thing. I'm not sure the reasons people get into rebound relationships are that different from a non rebound relatinship entry.

I agree with dofacc too and maybe thats why I don't understand people calling relationships rebounds. I know in my relationships I was pretty miserable LONG before the breakup happened so if anything I'm feeling free and open and available soon after relationships end.

True. I tel people all the time that by the time the break up actually happens, the bulk of the pain/heartbreak has already occured.

Same thing applies in situations where a person's intuition about their partners cheating provokes them to investigate and/or look for trouble. By the time your partner actually admits to the truth or gets caught red-handed, the majority and bulk of the pain already happened. Hell, it takes ALOT of energy out of a woman/man to acknowledge that they're being betrayed, look for trouble/the truth & actually process it all. Hell, by the time a woman/man finally presents her "presentation" to his/her scandalous partner, most of the tears have already been cried out. The most draining part is in the investigating (knowing that you have to stoop so low just to get the truth), not the final outcome. I don't think people realize that