How long can you go w/o sex?

If you're in a relationship, how long can you go w/o sex before finally questioning where the relationship stands OR considering to get it from someone else (if so)?

For those of you that are single, how long can you honestly go w/o sex before finally giving in to 1 of your Fbuddies, having a 1 night stand or jumping into a relationship?

I'm sure some of you will say that technically you can go w/o it for long periods of time, BUT that's not what recent data suggest. More relationships than ever are ending and/or going sour b/c of lack of sex. People say that sex can change things, especially if it's non-existent in a relationship or in your life period.

Hell, some people can't even go 2 wks w/o it before questioning their relationship!!!

Be honest people, how long can you go without it before you start having lustful thoughts for others or atleast questioning things— Now keep in mind, I'm asking this question with the assumption that you've ALREADY voiced your concerns/desires with your partner & that your attemtps at "getting some" have failed. Then what? Especially if the communication or everything else in the relationship is on point?

26 years

Not 26 years, but a long, long time.

I questioned the relationship most of that time, however. Just couldn't get out of it for various reasons. Long dry spells for fairly young people is not the sort of thing that speaks of a good thing.

I went for just shy of 4 years.obviously not a fwb kinda girl...
if I were in a relationship and was not having regular sex,I would definitely know something was wrong.
if you're not having it,and not communicating about it...then why would you want to stay in a bad relationship?
anyway to me it would be bad.

2 years since the divorce. Not a FWB chick either. The same again, if sex weren't happening something would be askew in my world. And I'd be wanting to find out what it was PDQ.
Lustful thought I have often, those I keep to myself. There would be no action taken on my part if I were in relationship. That is for the dude giving me Dutch ovens at night ( I know, doesn't that just fair bleed romance and hearts? ) not for anyone else unless it was done.
If communication and so on were on point I would start delving into possible medical reasons, or perhaps he's just been having one shit week. You know, common sense things. But hey, swat the bum, talk doity to me and when things are back on track, giddyup.

Posted by BellatheBull
I...then why would you want to stay in a bad relationship?
anyway to me it would be bad.

Yes yes BINGO! You said it right there! I think it's interesting (not necessarily wrong or right) that you'd consider a relationship "bad" if it was lacking sex but yet good in all other areas. Hmmm..

I think it's absolutely possible though for a relationship to be sex-less & yet have great and effective communication

In a relationship I will get cranky and borderline act like i have pms, even though i don't really suffer from pms, if i go without sex for more than 2 days. i prefer once a day... at least. sex is very important to me. i would start questioning things after only a few days because my partners know that i'm a sex fiend. it's a big no-no to turn it down and THAT is when i become demanding and impatient.

i was single for 1.5 years and i was celibate the entire time. i had one fwb and it's not for me. sex is definitely not casual for me and i can abstain for extended periods of time until i find the right partner.

no,no....if there was a valid reason we were not having sex,and we were communicating about it...that would be different.
but if we just weren't...and it wasn't being talked about....there's something seriously wrong there.
communication,and yes sex...are part of being very close to me.so if they are both missing...then the relationship is no good.

"I think it's absolutely possible though for a relationship to be sex-less & yet have great and effective communication"

This sounds like the relationship I had with my Aqua. It was everything I could ask for...great conversations, hardly any communication issues (it was like we knew what the other was thinking) and we spoke through actions. We shared alot in common and still had seperate interests/lives. THe only thing we did NOT have was the physical, due to his religious beliefs. He was very much a gentleman. 🙂

If I am in a relationship, I could go for a while w/o sex. The longest I went in that relationship was 6 weeks (he traveled alot with his job) but MAN, I could NOT wait to get my paws all over him when he got back 😛

I think the longer you can go w/o sex in a relationship, it makes the relationship that much stronger. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that it has to happen every night, but it's nice to know that sex is not the ONLY thing the relationship is based on.

For those who can't go longer than a few weeks without it, I'm curious...um...what happens when the woman gets pregnant & just so happens to be 1 of those preggos that don't want to be touched? Then what?!

Or what if your partner has surgery or has some type of temporary medical issue that prevents them from having sex for awhile? Then what?!

Or what about the people who have partners in the military who are serving overseas or that work out of town or over seas? Then what?

I think I can go w/o sex for about 2-3 months MAX! Well, as long as there was still some form of intimacy/affection/cuddling going on, I'd be fine. And I'd feel even better if my partner communicated to me why sex was something they couldn't offer at the moment. He'd just have to trust me that I understood & would be patient.

I think a relationship is on a dangerous road though when 2 people have stopped having sex and yet 1 or neither person doesn't even know why the sex has stopped. When the sex stops, eventually so does the intimacy, romance, and/or affection too? And see, once all the other things stop, I think THAT'S when I'd be alarmed & start questioning things regardless of whatever "excuses" my partner gave me.

For me, it's all about feeling desired. I can feel desired by my partner w/o us actually having sex. But I would no longer feel desired if the sex AND cuddling, affection, intimacy stopped. Then we'd have a problem & I'd have to seriously question whether or not what they're "communicating" to me as their reasons why, were actually true or not.

I can handle my man saying he's too tired to have sex a few nights a week. But uh oh, I'd seriously have doubts if he started turning away or ignoring my efforts to cuddle or get my daily kiss on the lips. That'd indicate a problem.

I hate it when I see 1 person whose not a sex fiend getting into a relationship with someone who is, b/c you know up front that later on down the road, sex (or lack thereof) will probably become a problem. I think some people just want to atleast know that their partners have some freakiness or sex fiend in them "just in case" BUT I don't think that everyone who claims to love sex necessarily wants it all the time. That's why people have got to be HONEST about their sexual expectations up front!

I swear sometimes K7 it's like you read my mind.....lol. Although, I would be a bit put off if a potential just came right out and laid (no pun intended) his sexual expectations out. Seriously dude? We are just having dinner? lol

Posted by Archimedes
I swear sometimes K7 it's like you read my mind.....lol. Although, I would be a bit put off if a potential just came right out and laid (no pun intended) his sexual expectations out. Seriously dude? We are just having dinner? lol

lol lol. Well of course there's always a right place & right time to talk about things like that. I think people understimate and/or shrug off the "Sex talk" but in fact, I think that kind of talk is 1 of the most important talks 2 people can have! It may not be the most important, but hey, you can't know what to do or where to go if you're not sure exactly what the other person is expecting; it's quite hard to fulfill someone's needs if you don't even know what they are. It's quite hard to maintain a good relationship if the communication is off in 1 area...and yes, sex is 1 of those issues that need to be communicated often, & hell ESPECIALLY when sex is lacking for prolonged periods of time. Whether a couple talks it out/talks about it or not can make/break the relationship or set the tone for the relationship eventually going sour

Whaaaat??! I'd get crazy without it... shall we say 24hour?

Posted by THEKingofLibra
Hehe.. You fuckers may laugh, I dont care. First longest was 3 years and 6 months. Currently its 5 years and 1 month. Lets see here.. Between work, school, and video games, there is no time for a woman 😛

Good on you. Not even a fleshlight to entertain you?

Posted by TasteOfChaos

Posted by THEKingofLibra
Hehe.. You fuckers may laugh, I dont care. First longest was 3 years and 6 months. Currently its 5 years and 1 month. Lets see here.. Between work, school, and video games, there is no time for a woman 😛

Wow, no wonder you act like a horny rabid beast on DXP...

I dont believe you btw...

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ROFL! Everything makes so much sense now.

I got ya K7. I was thinking of a scene where someone just met someone and they just jumped right intothe "sex talk" convo....lol

I agree that couples should have the "sex talk" (gosh....sounds like grade school...lol). Sex is another form of communication and if the verbal and mental is on par....so should the physical.

PB wins!

i've never gone more than 5 days without sex while in a relationship and i'd like to keep it that way.

prefer it every day sometimes multiple times

Posted by THEKingofLibra

Posted by venusianbull
PB wins!

Fuck that desert vag.

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If you really search you might find a shred of something nice to say. TRY. I promise you won't erupt into a ball of flame. I think it's admirable of her, so stuff the attitude.

—

I am not impressed by your allusions, nor bedazzled by your ability to use a bit of word play. What I do have to say to you is very plain English: Stuff it up your ass. Crystal clear and to the point. Have a good evening.

The longest I've gone while being single was 8 months.... In a relationship I dont rememeber.

3 months tops. And that's only because of distance.

Posted by THEKingofLibra

Posted by EmotionalMoon
5 years and yes I was in a relationship...

Whoa that is one dry vag

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Kinda like your dusty, rusty pecker, eh? 😛

HMMMM In a relationship....I honestly am addicted to my man and NEED it, but he travels and so do I so when we see each other, which is about once or twice every two weeks we are all over it...we both need it like breakfast and dinner. While I don't see him, I have some help from Mr.AA =) and if I'm single, I don't even care for it. (I guess whoever I'm committed to gets what is built up)

I was with my man and didn't have sex with him for 9 months. I definately had fantasies about this other dude I was feeling, but never crossed the line. I also knew he was cheating on me, but I didn't care because I figured someone had to screw him. Better them than me. I just stayed for our daughter. A few months ago, I broke my 3 year 4 month no sex streak. I was a little cranky at times, and stayed with wrinkled fingers (lmao) but I was ok. This scorpio was just so damn sexy, and kind of sweet, so after a few months dating him I caved.

Honestly.... I can go without it for quit a long time. My boyfriend asked me if there's anything wrong after about 3 weeks. I guess I just didn't want to have sex. Maybe it's a deeper person issue I think it's something I have to talk about with my therapist. But besides that, sex, now that I have it, doesn't seem as great as it sounds. It's just... blah. I mean it feels good, and my boyfriend is extremely passionate (and I let him do most of the work lol since I don't really know what to do). I used to be more excited about sex when I was a virgin! There wasn't a day I wouldn't think about it. Now, it's like... let's just watch a movie or something. Yup. But I'm working on it.