What About Chemistry??

Astrological compatibility may be a good starting point for understanding relationships, but what about chemistry?

For example: I'm a Virgo, and my first wife is a Libra. According to astrology, this pairing shouldn't work, and yet we were married for over 20 years -- and all but the last 5 or 6 we were a happy couple most of the time. We had a genuine connection mentally, and were very compatible physically / sexually, so I'd say we had pretty good chemistry...

For me, chemistry is more than a physical response, although we tend to feel that one first. I've read about the biology of PEA (phenyl ethylamine) -- the natural amphetamine that stimulates us and increases both physical and emotional energy. PEA gives us that "rush" when we're falling in love (or, lust) with another, and as it naturally wanes (we can't stay "high" forever!), many people feel that as a loss of passion...

For a relationship to last more than a few weeks or months, there has to be some other element at work besides PEA, or even endorphins (the body's own morphine), which are known to increase as a relationship deepens (amore becomes true love).

I wonder if there's an "unspoken language" at work that draws two people together. The natural objective of bringing man & woman together is to produce children. I wonder if we don't instinctively communicate attraction and compatibility at a level below our awareness -- a Darwinian mechanism that helps guarantee survival of the species. (Yeah, I know! Leave it to a Virgo to take all the romance out of romance!)

Now that my ScorpWife and I have had Twins, it makes me wonder even more. In the past, I've always been attracted to women who were: average height or slightly taller (5'4"), dark haired, blue eyed, and curvaceous; and yet my Scorp is short (4'11"), blond, brown eyed, and slender. But we obviously have good chemistry, because I felt a powerful attraction for her the first time we sat down together on a date; and, she claims she knew I was made for her shortly after meeting me. I had to have my vasectomy reversed, which lowers a man's fertility, and yet she got pregnant pretty damn quick after I recovered from the operation. Not to mention, she felt a desire to have children with me early on in our courtship, even though we were both getting too old for it.

Some of the confusion I've displayed on DXP over my Scorp has been because (in Virgo terms) things just don't compute. My mind accepts that there's a certain amount of "magic" (stuff we don't yet understand) about love -- or astrology, for that matter -- but it is in my nature to try and find answers...

So, how do y'all define chemistry? Or, like my Scorp, do y'all not worry about such things, and instead revel in the mystery of life?

Dy...

My belief is that there are some things in this world that we are not capable to understand no matter how much we want to soooooooo like your scorpwife, I too agree that it is best to be in the moment enjoying each experience ALLOWING life to open to us blessing us all with the many wonderful magical mysteries (gifts)that only life can do.

relax...enjoy the unexpected, the unexplainedable moments.....just, in-joy and be happy.

smiles 😉

*capable of not understanding

chemistry....

perhaps our thoughts are VERY powerful and we attract those people and circumstances to us because at this moment in time they are needed for our growth.

hence...there is "chemistry"

Chemistry is more important then just a sign. I'm an Aries and supposed to be the best match with a Leo. I never dated or liked or was friends or got along with any Leo people. Also, life experiences form us like people more then just astrological influence. So, the signs are great but the chemistry is what makes us thick🙂

bijou: "...attraction comes first - but it is the first kiss that propels undeniable chemistry."

I can't argue with that statement. With us Virgs, you gotta attract the Mind first, before the Physical connection is made, and only then will you capture our Heart (we surrender the most valuable & vulnerable part last!).

VGM, I think Scorpio + Virgo is pair made in Heaven and on Earth - astrology + biology - and that's what makes it so overwhelming. And, so hard to break.

How about this: Astrology is a guide to what could be, while Chemistry is result of what is... (a Virgo rephrasing of ariesgirl402, "So, the signs are great but the chemistry is what makes us thick.")

VK: "Do you think that two incompatable people(incompatable by Astrology) can have a promising future if the chemistry is right?"

Yes -- I've seen it myself.

My Leo Mom + my Virgo Dad. Very loving & passionate couple -- really inspired their kids.