Which is harder?

Searching for love & not being able to find it thus far

Or Letting go of the love you once had?

Honestly, when I really think about it, I think both are just as hard.

Both scenarios can bring on feelings of rejection, doubt, insecurity, disappointment, incompatibility, the stress to be good enough, etc.

The difference is that not finding love is you grieving the death of something you never had, as opposed to grieving the death of something you had. Both are pretty hard on the heart & ego.

Letting go of the love you once had

it all depends . if my memories of a past love reminds me how much I was loved , and if those memories help me to get by in life then I use them as long as I happy. the munite you accept the fact that its possible to love more one person your whole life will become a whole lot better. putting limitations on how you its a mother fucker and its too painfull. loving someone doesn't mean you should be with them it simply means you have the capacity to look beyond your selfishness and offer kind and pure energy towards someone else. love is not about sex control or any of the power trips .its when you lose the ego I found out that your truely able to love Atleast for me. we all at times want to possess things in order to be proud of ourselves, but you cant contain love its a free spirit you iether avoid it or experience it. but if you are brave enough to accept and acknowledge it, it will teach you things you never knew existed that are way beyond your imagination. ..

Lady for once I understand what you're saying and I appreciate your words...But I'm sticking with what I wrote...I am stubborn, can't help it.

It seems that people underestimate the emotions & pains 'single but no luck' women/men have.

I don't mean the people who are content with being single...I'm talking about those who have looked & looked and have come out empty handed...It puts wear and tear on your heart...especially in this day and age when so many things are given long before a relationship becomes official (sex, emotions, effort, time, trust, etc.)

I've seen so many single women who feel defeated, lack confidence, have low self-esteem & are overall defeated & worn down. They share the same pains & inner heartbreak that the women who just got out of relationships have.

Losing the 1 you love is torture, but some times so is never finding what you feel you deserve/always wanted.

Stop looking and focus on yourself.
You'll be happier for doing so.
Men can wait.
Step your game up, get a career, find your passion and pursue your dreams.
I realise it is not that serious
Men dont complete me...money does lol!!

Posted by crabRiot
Stop looking and focus on yourself.
You'll be happier for doing so.
Men can wait.
Step your game up, get a career, find your passion and pursue your dreams.
I realise it is not that serious
Men dont complete me...money does lol!!

I agree. Everyone wants someone, but I'm not going to sit around waiting for just one thing, so I do what I love every day and I work hard. It's made me even more picky about people, but I don't find it to be a bad thing, it shows you what you really want in someone, because if you yourself are happy then you know you have a lot to offer someone, so you don't settle for anyone who will offer you less than what you have to offer them.

I think letting go of a past love, because having someone is not the be all and end all. Love is in many things.

Both are easy.

I've found plenty of love in my life, in different capacities. And I can let go and cherish the memory.

@craRoit
I know I am also stubborn.lol!
money does complete me as well the only reason i am happy this days is because of money ching ! $

@craRoit
I know I am also stubborn.lol!
money does complete me as well the only reason i am happy this days is because of money ching ! ching! $

Follow your mind, not your heart.. your mind. And being a Taurus stellium female. I can't be with someone who isn't reciprocating the important things in a friendship and relationship..think future or go home. Leave me alone. Yes it takes two.. it should never be one sided. Letting go is your heart..making a mental list is what's going to make my decision or if I had the experience already letting go isn't hard. Your mind is already made up. We're fixed.

Let go might be harder. IDK.

Maybe because I have to think what we could have done better. Also all the memories.

Posted by krysrenee7
Searching for love & not being able to find it thus far

I would think this would be hardest. Letting go comes from knowledge whereas searching is more unknown.

Posted by starlover

Posted by krysrenee7
Searching for love & not being able to find it thus far

Or Letting go of the love you once had?

Honestly, when I really think about it, I think both are just as hard.

Both scenarios can bring on feelings of rejection, doubt, insecurity, disappointment, incompatibility, the stress to be good enough, etc.

The difference is that not finding love is you grieving the death of something you never had, as opposed to grieving the death of something you had. Both are pretty hard on the heart & ego.

Which one are you going through Kry

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Neither. I'm still happily married lol I got into a heated debate with my friend who has been eternally single despite being gorgeous, successful & beautiful in spirit. Her confidence is so shot b/c she's always been a hopeless romantic with dreams of having been married with kids by now. She seems so broken, which is confusing to me b/c she's only been in 1 relationship & doesn't really know what heartbreak feels like.

I'm realizing that it's easy to shrug someone off & say, "Girl please, that's nothing compared to what I've been through or oh that's nothing compared to actually being hurt by someone you loved who once loved you back," but in HER mind, she really feels like she can identify with heartbreak the way those who have loved and lost can...the heartbreak of rejection. And I was curious to know if maybe I've never given thought to the fact that heartbreak can happen to single women too.