Scorpios and the Verbal Stinger

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DyarStra?e
@DyarStra?e
18 Years1,000+ PostsVirgo

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I made this observation over on the Libra Board [http://www.dxpnet.com/opinion/messages.asp?id=1182222]...<BR>
When we first started dating, Debra had this preconception of me as a macho, strong-willed, egotistical jock fighter pilot; and, she seemed more than willing to surrender the reins to me (she'd been on her own for a while). I think she was a little surprised and maybe disappointed to find I was much more flexible than that -- more willing to follow her lead. It was rocky at first, but now we've achieved a pretty good balance in power-sharing -- we each have areas of responsibility where the follower defers to the leader. We each know about how far the other will give on a certain issue, and we're pretty good at staying within the limits. Honestly, I'm the one more likely to push it, and p1ss her off; but unlike my LibraEX, my Scorp says NO! and means it.

- - - - -

We had Twins back in NOV - a girl & a boy - and they're both a handful. They cry and whine more with me than with their mother, and she can usually calm them down much faster and better than I can. But, our Son is no doubt The World's Biggest Titty Baby, and Debra does not like me saying so...

Saturday he got to fussing & whining with me, so I handed him off to his mother. She couldn't console him, either, and I popped off, "Debra, that boy whines & cries more than Carrie [my original Scorp Daughter] ever did!"

She looks up from him, flashes me The Look Of Death, "Uh-huh. That's because he's just like his Daddy!!"

Youch! That shut me up for a while!

In fairness, I'm home alone with The Twins today while Debra's at a farewell luncheon her coworkers held for her, and they've been pretty good for me - thus far! You never know with these two babies...

Anyway, one thing I've noticed about the Scorpion Stinger is that they don't waste it. That is, Debra will zap me once, and if the poison is working, she won't keep stinging me just for the hell of it...

Sure does hurt, though...
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DyarStra?e
@DyarStra?e
18 Years1,000+ PostsVirgo

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SL: "She is dealing with a lot....what she don't need is you complaining..."

I know! But I'm a Virgo, we invented complaining. But we prefer to call it, pointing out problem areas that need correcting!

I keep my comments to a minimum, but our son really is a cry baby. But you're right, I don't need to remind his mother of that fact -- or compare him to my Perfect Daughter...

Hey MISSY! Too bad you didn't move to The States -- we could use a good baby sitter! Seems like the only person who can control the Scorp Twins is another Scorp...
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Scorpionlady
@Scorpionlady
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"I know! But I'm a Virgo, we invented complaining. But we prefer to call it, pointing out problem areas that need correcting!"

"I keep my comments to a minimum, but our son really is a cry baby. But you're right, I don't need to remind his mother of that fact -- or compare him to my Perfect Daughter..."

Yea you think you keep them to a minimum but to her you are being a pain in her ass...back off and let her handle them and if she needs you I am quite sure she will call you for help...just support her....



MM
"Don't know how people have the patience for those things.."

Before I had my son I loved children I was patient with them and could shut them up...know my son is 21 I want him out...so that I can be by myself again, I don't want to watch no body's baby....I just want to look at them say how cute they are and think to myself...damn they got 20 years at least better them then me.

candlz
"And I love using that stinger when nothing else works...stops people dead in their tracks!!"

you will find that when you get older that using the stinger when nothing else works will still create a problem....I try my damdest to not harm no one verbally or physically today...because I know the depth of my stinger....and some days are harder than other.

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candlz
@candlz
19 Years

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you will find that when you get older that using the stinger when nothing else works will still create a problem....I try my damdest to not harm no one verbally or physically today...because I know the depth of my stinger....and some days are harder than other.


Dang!! How much older do I have to get— LOL!!! I am probably old enough to be mom to most of the posters on DXP!!!!

But, I have also found that I do not use my stinger all that much, but when I have to, it has escalated to a point that I don't care about harming them..I just want them off my ass!!!
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DyarStra?e
@DyarStra?e
18 Years1,000+ PostsVirgo

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fumingli_scorp: "This is a slice of truth from a virgo's day-to-day live correcting the world and serving with honest contributions."

Yes, but we often "help" too much with our honest criticisms. Believe it or not, but I've gotten much better at "helping" less over the years. I let more things slide by without putting in my opinion (except on DXP, of course!)...

I've learned from my Scorp that a big ol' hug from me means more to her than, "Poor Debra! Here's what you need to do... yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada ~~ yada yada..."
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Scorpionlady
@Scorpionlady
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Dy
"... so, I hug more, and talk less ..."
Yes Yes Yes.....


candlz
Dang!! How much older do I have to get— LOL!!! I am probably old enough to be mom to most of the posters on DXP!!!!

LOL....that's funny but yet true 🙂 maybe you can help them to calm there emotions so they don't have to go around stinging people....cuz you can lose some really special people that will come and your life and leave because of that behavior.

"But, I have also found that I do not use my stinger all that much, but when I have to, it has escalated to a point that I don't care about harming them..I just want them off my ass!!!"

Well see I am passed that I don't worry about getting them off my back....I just don't deal with them anymore...if I have to result to stinging you or being vindictive...then I really don't need to deal with you at all...
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Eaglegirl
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Don't come between a mother and her son!

Especially not a Scorp mother....Dy, I'm surprised that, given all your extensive knowledge about Scorps, that you don't understand the Scorp maternal instinct. It is way up there with the Cancerian mother -- we *protect* our kids, and are more likely to believe that words are understood by our babies on a subliminal level.

Well....I believe this!

Curb your sharp Virgo tongue! He's only a baby! And everyone knows that boys have a tougher time growing up than girls.
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DyarStra?e
@DyarStra?e
18 Years1,000+ PostsVirgo

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Eaglegirl: "Curb your sharp Virgo tongue!"

OK! OK! I've already been stung - that's what started this thread!

"He's only a baby!"

Yes, and he's a Titty Baby, too. (And no, not just like his Daddy!)

"And everyone knows that boys have a tougher time growing up than girls."

If I have my way, he's gonna get toughened up -- no sissy-britches in my house!

(And yes... I fully expect future stingings.)

"Don't come between a mother and her son!"

Now wait just a cotton-tailed minute! I'm his Daddy -- the pater familias -- so I have a part to play in his development, too. Debra & I just have different views & methods of child-rearing that we're still sorting out. In the meantime, I just have to avoid being too "helpful" during stressful situations...

But about The Twins: I've noticed that my daughter smiles at me more than my son when I'm holding them both (and they're not crying for a change). They'll look at me like they're trying to figure out who or what I am, and then she'll usually smile. He'll toss his arms around and act like he's trying to tell me something important. They don't coo with me like they do with Debra, but then again, I'm not the Milk Maid...
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Eaglegirl
@Eaglegirl
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Dy,

Okay, no more stings! (Didn't intend to anyway, just was on my soap box....)

It's hard for Dad because both babies want Mom more when they're little. Boys are more vulnerable than girls in every way -- physiologically, academically, etc. -- until they hit high school. Then girls need support, because they tend to slack off and worry about their looks too much.

If your boy wants titty, let him have it! He needs the extra support and love, because he's not naturally as calm as his sister. Sometimes I think you Daddies start in with the tough love thing way too early. Let Mother Nature play her part. There's a reason that he nestles into mom at this point -- and you really need to back off!

When the kids are older, it will be Deb's turn to suffer. Teenage girls want to get mom off their back, and both sexes respect Dad more. It's then Dad's turn to "lead them out into the world", and poor old Mom walks around feeling useless.
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DyarStra?e
@DyarStra?e
18 Years1,000+ PostsVirgo

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Eaglegirl,

Your comments on right on the mark, as usual. I know there'll be a change in roles for us as the Twins get older, and I just have to chill out for now - but you know how us Virgs want to help!

fumingli_scorp: "sometimes we can get overprotective and dads put the kid straight in some ways."

Yeah, that was the way my VirDad was with us kids - The Disciplinarian. We could get away with more stuff with Mom - real soft-hearted Leo with lots of motherly love - but even when Dad was being tough, we knew he was fair. That's the way I want to be. Just never had a Son before, so I'm kinda learning myself!

See: They both resemble their mother. They're smaller than average now, and if they stay that way, it'll be tough for our boy. That's why I want to make sure he can stand on his own. But yeah, I still have YEARS to mold him into a man...

AM: "...imagine when my daughter's born?"

You'll do fine. If your Scorp is like my brother, your daughter is gonna love him to death!
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DyarStra?e
@DyarStra?e
18 Years1,000+ PostsVirgo

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exam: "Why don't you do a blog /diary in here about your Scorp daughter?"

Whew! Wish I had time! But I will try to post updates when I can...

You're about the same age as my original Scorpio daughter -- she went and grew up on me!

My younger daughter is different -- at least as far as I remember -- but, anotherscorp's "Scorpios are like Spaniels...hyperactive as hell for the first 3-4 years and then they mellow into quite loving, compassionate and intelligent children. But it's those first years that do the parents in..." rings true to me!

The Twins are a handful, BUT, they've been home alone with me while Deb's at work yesterday & today, and they've actually been good babies for a change. It's like, when she's home they know it, and give me a hard time. Go figure!

Despite their diminutive size, they already have stingers of their own...