licornefille
@licornefille
12 YearsGemini
Comments: 0 · Posts: 16 · Topics: 1
Seriously need help dealing with Scorpio man......
When Scorpio texted me the following day, we set up an agreement that he would be my secret boyfriend — not anything official, because neither of us are ready for a relationship. We would spend two nights a week together, playing games or watching movies, & that's all I would ask. He insisted that it be more often than that. So, I started seeing him four or more nights a week. I'm not proud to say that I??ve slept with several men, but not a single one of them was ever anything like him??_ it is by far the most amazing sex I??ve ever had; it's called up the succubus in me & I can't help but give him everything he wants every time. It goes on for 2+ hours until our muscles give out & we are almost dehydrated.
Outside of the bedroom, we spent time alone, cuddling on the couch, smoking cigarettes on the porch where we compulsively touched each other, shopping or going on little food dates where he would put his hand on my leg in the car. I had told myself that this Scorpio was a safe bet for me because he was the only one of my male friends that isn't in love with me, so I could have fun with him for a while probably — but as soon as he said he had feelings for me, I would leave — that's what I always do to protect people. As time went on, the secrets deepened, the two of us & Aries would play games all night & as soon as Aries fell asleep Scorpio & I would run to his room. Eventually, I got sloppy & kissed Scorpio one night when I thought Aries wasn't looking??_ but he was.
Aries went completely insane on us, as expected, & he ended my friendship with him. Yet he immediately forgave Scorpio, who knew the whole time that Aries had been in love with me. I told Scorpio that if he wanted we would stop seeing each other, I wanted to save our friendships. He said he still wanted to see me, but that we shouldn't be crazy in front of Aries. After a week of screaming phone calls, hateful texts & emo facebook posts, Aries finally said we could be friends again — but that it??d never be the same.
Outside of the bedroom, we spent time alone, cuddling on the couch, smoking cigarettes on the porch where we compulsively touched each other, shopping or going on little food dates where he would put his hand on my leg in the car. I had told myself that this Scorpio was a safe bet for me because he was the only one of my male friends that isn't in love with me, so I could have fun with him for a while probably — but as soon as he said he had feelings for me, I would leave — that's what I always do to protect people. As time went on, the secrets deepened, the two of us & Aries would play games all night & as soon as Aries fell asleep Scorpio & I would run to his room. Eventually, I got sloppy & kissed Scorpio one night when I thought Aries wasn't looking??_ but he was.
Aries went completely insane on us, as expected, & he ended my friendship with him. Yet he immediately forgave Scorpio, who knew the whole time that Aries had been in love with me. I told Scorpio that if he wanted we would stop seeing each other, I wanted to save our friendships. He said he still wanted to see me, but that we shouldn't be crazy in front of Aries. After a week of screaming phone calls, hateful texts & emo facebook posts, Aries finally said we could be friends again — but that it??d never be the same.
Scorpio & I continued to see each other, now with no need for secrets, & the sex got even better. I??d had to face the thought of losing him when I suggested we end things for our friend, thinking that I??d be okay if he said yes??_ but I was wrong. Suddenly I began to realize that I have feelings for him. At first I tried to deny it, told myself I was rebounding, told myself I just loved the sex??_ but I found myself thinking about him every second of the day. When I'm around him my heart beats so hard, my chest tightens, I can barely breathe??_ his lightest touch makes my skin burn.
After things were finally starting to be okay with the three of us (early July) & Aries had accepted our activities, Scorpio began to grow distant. He started ignoring my text messages & not contacting me for a whole day, not secretly touching me when we were around people, barely touching me when we were alone??_ which was completely the opposite of how the last few months had been. I had to ask what was wrong, & he said that it had been too much for him recently & that he isn't ready for anything more than my company — he needed time to think. I accepted that & apologized for pressuring him??_ but he??d seemed so interested in me before, I just went with it??_ I didn't talk to him in text for the next four days, but I saw him one night — the first night the three of us hung out together again. It was completely normal. Then last Friday, I tried to get him to open up to me about why he's brooding??_ he said he feels purposeless & is trying to find something constructive to do with his life??_ he's a 26 y/o mechanical engineer who??s colleagues are all 40+, he rents a house, he's more well-off than ANY of my friends, & I was surprised to hear him say something like that. I offered my time if he ever needed to talk but I'm not sure if he's really ready to be open with me??_ I'm not pressuring him.
After things were finally starting to be okay with the three of us (early July) & Aries had accepted our activities, Scorpio began to grow distant. He started ignoring my text messages & not contacting me for a whole day, not secretly touching me when we were around people, barely touching me when we were alone??_ which was completely the opposite of how the last few months had been. I had to ask what was wrong, & he said that it had been too much for him recently & that he isn't ready for anything more than my company — he needed time to think. I accepted that & apologized for pressuring him??_ but he??d seemed so interested in me before, I just went with it??_ I didn't talk to him in text for the next four days, but I saw him one night — the first night the three of us hung out together again. It was completely normal. Then last Friday, I tried to get him to open up to me about why he's brooding??_ he said he feels purposeless & is trying to find something constructive to do with his life??_ he's a 26 y/o mechanical engineer who??s colleagues are all 40+, he rents a house, he's more well-off than ANY of my friends, & I was surprised to hear him say something like that. I offered my time if he ever needed to talk but I'm not sure if he's really ready to be open with me??_ I'm not pressuring him.
We hung out with Aries Friday, again totally normal night, then Saturday we went to the movies with some of our other friends. My gf & I stayed on his couch that night as the three of us watched movies until 6am — he could have gone to his bedroom at any time but he stayed right there between us & slept. I could not sleep at all.. I couldn't stop thinking about him, about how we used to pass out on the couch curled around each other, or how he held me in his arms in bed every night.
I gave myself an anxiety attack the next morning, when we parted with a gentle hug & he said —See you soon.?? I had two more attacks during that day, a full shift of work - yesterday. Today I couldn't get out of bed until 3pm, it's 6pm now & I haven't even eaten??_ I??ve been crying most of the day (& week). I'm not going to try talking to him??_ I'm just going to wait & see if he ever talks to me again. But I'm just so completely, utterly, confused & hurt??_ he used to act so interested in me & then for nothing I??ve done, suddenly changes. Right when I was starting to feel truly vulnerable to another human being (which I never have before — I'm very apathetic, guarded & selfish), starting to wonder if I had ever even had love before, the person that was bringing these long dead emotions to life inside me just disappears basically.
I gave myself an anxiety attack the next morning, when we parted with a gentle hug & he said —See you soon.?? I had two more attacks during that day, a full shift of work - yesterday. Today I couldn't get out of bed until 3pm, it's 6pm now & I haven't even eaten??_ I??ve been crying most of the day (& week). I'm not going to try talking to him??_ I'm just going to wait & see if he ever talks to me again. But I'm just so completely, utterly, confused & hurt??_ he used to act so interested in me & then for nothing I??ve done, suddenly changes. Right when I was starting to feel truly vulnerable to another human being (which I never have before — I'm very apathetic, guarded & selfish), starting to wonder if I had ever even had love before, the person that was bringing these long dead emotions to life inside me just disappears basically.
I know what I'm going to do. I??ve already been on a heavy regiment of convincing myself that I don't really love him & that he doesn't want me, & I'm just going to let him be. But what I want to know is, do you guys think that he actually has feelings for me too? Do you think that's part of what's making him question his life? He is so secretive, I don't know how I could even find out from him, & he can't talk to his best friend because it's Aries who??s sworn to never help us be together. The way he used to act, the things he used to say??_ —I miss you?? —I can't stop thinking about you?? —A day apart is too long!?? I feel lead on kind of, I wish he never would have said those things & just left it at sex. It's been over a week since we've had sex, when we couldn't go for more than two days before for nearly two months, & I??ve only even seen him a small handful of times??_ he looks fine.
I'm undecided on what to do if he texts me this week. Should I just ignore him & give him his space? Should I just act like we used to, friendly, pretend nothing happened? Aries has been bi-polar on me this last week so I told him today that I need to be alone for a while & will contact him next week probably. I'm terrified to tell Aries how I feel, I don't want him to think my feelings are ingenuine because I don't believe they are, but it hasn't even been 2 months that we've been together so I wouldn't blame him for thinking it.
I'm a fiction writer in the game industry & I??ve began to write a new game as catharsis for this situation. I am both inspired & depressed, in love & in pain. I just want some clarity but no one wants to talk about our problems, they just ignore them when we??re together — I'm no better! But please if anyone has any insight, I??d appreciate it??_ I don't even know another Scorpio, they are completely new territory to me, & I'm at a total loss on what's going on??_
I'm a fiction writer in the game industry & I??ve began to write a new game as catharsis for this situation. I am both inspired & depressed, in love & in pain. I just want some clarity but no one wants to talk about our problems, they just ignore them when we??re together — I'm no better! But please if anyone has any insight, I??d appreciate it??_ I don't even know another Scorpio, they are completely new territory to me, & I'm at a total loss on what's going on??_
Holy shit! Another post needing cliff notes. Going to read through this then answer....
definitely no bullshit here
Mmmmmmh juicy
Posted by everevolvingepithet
What's the computer game about?
it's a psuedo fantasy rococo future, role-playing brawler where you actually fight against the hero instead of the villain...
i dont want it to be a secret relationship anymore... i want it to be a real one but he's not ready so...
unicorn girl
I know who she is.
I know who she is.
well if you do dont tell anyone mr fire bird please, because this is not public information.........
Posted by licornefille
well if you do dont tell anyone mr fire bird please, because this is not public information.........
I haven't betrayed anyone, yet.
i appreciate it thank you
Ok so like whats this thing about Sims?
Posted by licornefille
I gave myself an anxiety attack the next morning, when we parted with a gentle hug & he said —See you soon.?? I had two more attacks during that day, a full shift of work - yesterday. Today I couldn't get out of bed until 3pm, it's 6pm now & I haven't even eaten??_ I??ve been crying most of the day (& week). I'm not going to try talking to him??_ I'm just going to wait & see if he ever talks to me again. But I'm just so completely, utterly, confused & hurt??_ he used to act so interested in me & then for nothing I??ve done, suddenly changes. Right when I was starting to feel truly vulnerable to another human being (which I never have before — I'm very apathetic, guarded & selfish), starting to wonder if I had ever even had love before, the person that was bringing these long dead emotions to life inside me just disappears basically.
You're kidding right? Read your posts again and come again with that question. SMH.
Posted by PhoenixRisingYou're kidding right? Read your posts again and come again with that question. SMH.
well the only things ive done with him are basically act like a really good girlfriend. ive never shown or told him about what im going thru because i didnt know what it meant yet, so he doesn't know im sad, except that i miss him. & when we all hang out together, everyone acts exactly the same as ever. ive never done anything to pressure him for attention or guilt him as if its somehow his fault i feel bad. i know its my own fault.
Posted by kalin
Maybe the fact that you suggested to end things for your friend has something to do with it?? Idk
i thought that but he knew right away that i was giving him the choice to end it because i didnt want to end it myself. then, miraculously, aries talked to scorpio on my behalf recently, & reported to me that it has nothing to do with aries. he's dealing with figuring out his own life right now, & still trying to get over a long & destructive relationship, so im not trying to rush him. what im confused about is how he could be so passionate with me at first & act like he's my boyfriend, then we have a fight with someone else yet we still keep seeing each other, everything is the same, then suddenly he's put an incredible distance between us.
Posted by licornefillePosted by PhoenixRisingYou're kidding right? Read your posts again and come again with that question. SMH.
well the only things ive done with him are basically act like a really good girlfriend. ive never shown or told him about what im going thru because i didnt know what it meant yet, so he doesn't know im sad, except that i miss him. & when we all hang out together, everyone acts exactly the same as ever. ive never done anything to pressure him for attention or guilt him as if its somehow his fault i feel bad. i know its my own fault.click to expand
Look, this isn't about "fault" or blame. There are two people involved here. However, if you approach this from the "I'm completely innocent" you and this Scorp will continue to have problems. His shift didn't just come out of no where, so something is up. Especially to make such a huge shift. On the other hand, he needs to learn how to communicate his feelings/concerns/wants better. This started off shaky and I'm still questioning how the Ram fits in here. Unless he's a psycho, your need to hide this sexual relationship from him and his response to finding out about the two of you doesn't fit.
I'm not in the best mood to give advice, so I have nothing for you right now. I'll have to come back to this...
I read somewhere we Scorps can be selfish like that.
Aries is pretty crazy but I dunno if I'd say psycho... there are a few things that made him flip his shit...
he's been my best friend & rival since we were 14, we've almost dated like 3 times but never have
he's been in love with me for about 12 years
i'm sleeping with his best friend of the last 5 years
he's talked to scorpio a lot about his feelings for me
if he isnt working or playing games at home, he's at scorpio's house
he was going to rent a room from scorpio when scorp bought a house (soon)
scorpio & i wouldn't have gotten close at all if it werent for aries facillitating us all hanging out
the last girl that aries was in love with after me ended up dating scorpio for 7 years
the last 2 years of my crumbling relationship, aries was there for me 100% , trying to help me & keep me from feeling lonely without trying to convince me to be with him
i don't think im innocent, i just honestly cannot see what i've done to drive him away. i wish he would tell me. he actually blamed himself because he'd provoked all the excessive time we spent together & he knew it. he just made a mistake... he wasn't ready to be with me & he had no idea what it would be like.
he's been my best friend & rival since we were 14, we've almost dated like 3 times but never have
he's been in love with me for about 12 years
i'm sleeping with his best friend of the last 5 years
he's talked to scorpio a lot about his feelings for me
if he isnt working or playing games at home, he's at scorpio's house
he was going to rent a room from scorpio when scorp bought a house (soon)
scorpio & i wouldn't have gotten close at all if it werent for aries facillitating us all hanging out
the last girl that aries was in love with after me ended up dating scorpio for 7 years
the last 2 years of my crumbling relationship, aries was there for me 100% , trying to help me & keep me from feeling lonely without trying to convince me to be with him
i don't think im innocent, i just honestly cannot see what i've done to drive him away. i wish he would tell me. he actually blamed himself because he'd provoked all the excessive time we spent together & he knew it. he just made a mistake... he wasn't ready to be with me & he had no idea what it would be like.
Posted by licornefille
he's been my best friend... since we were 14, we've almost dated like 3 times
he's been in love with me for about 12 years
i'm sleeping with his best friend of the last 5 years
he's talked to scorpio a lot about his feelings for me
if he isnt working or playing games at home, he's at scorpio's house
he was going to rent a room from scorpio when scorp bought a house (soon)
scorpio & i wouldn't have gotten close at all if it werent for aries facillitating us all hanging out
the last girl that aries was in love with after me ended up dating scorpio for 7 years
the last 2 years of my crumbling relationship, aries was there for me 100% , trying to help me & keep me from feeling lonely without trying to convince me to be with him
....he actually blamed himself because he'd provoked all the excessive time we spent together & he knew it. he just made a mistake... he wasn't ready to be with me & he had no idea what it would be like.
My dear, you answered your own question. Sounds like your Scorp has a conscience. Don't take it too personal.
us post only applies if information isn't missing from your story.
If you two had met under different circumstances or your Scorp had approached the Ram like a man and told him what was up, the guilt wouldn't be eating at him. I also don't think the Ram would have reacted the way he did---then again, he's a Ram so *shrug*....
Of course, I may be wrong about all of this. He may have shifted because he just wanted sex from you and nothing more and now the relationship has run its course.I doubt that's it based on what you wrote .
Also:
Posted by licornefillePosted by kalin
Maybe the fact that you suggested to end things for your friend has something to do with it?? Idk
...i was giving him the choice to end it because i didnt want to end it myself...what im confused about is how he could be so passionate with me at first & act like he's my boyfriend, then we have a fight with someone else yet we still keep seeing each other, everything is the same, then suddenly he's put an incredible distance between us.click to expand
What seems sudden to you, is not "sudden" for us. Gem right? Most of you aren't very good at picking up on our emotional shifts until you get slapped in the face with it—or we tell you (😛 "Scorpio Stillness" thread). This situation was probably on his mind a lot more than you think. From his plotting to be the friend you could lean on while you "decided" to break up with your ex, to the "talk" he had with the Ram.
Yes we can be emotional, but we are also very reflective. All that passion (or emotions) you were feeling is a reflection of his thoughts. If we see you in a particular way or you hold a particular position in our life, you will most certainly feel it in our touch, our kiss and our embrace. Similarly, when we see you in a negative way or you no longer hold that position (or we are just confused about what we feel for you), you won't "feel" anything from us (e.g. distance, coldness). For some Scorps their thoughts and feelings are so interconnected that one doesn't shift without the other one shifting as well, almost immediately.
well thanks for your input guys... ive just decided to give up & get over it. if he comes back so be it & if not, just the same... im letting him go.
the mystery is solved.... he's been talking to a girl he briefly dated in college & he went to spend the weekend with her, apparently he has always wanted another shot with her.
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