unrequited love

I'm posting to the scorps because the OOMA happens to be one...

I have a scorpio male friend that doesn't fool me one bit by making rude remarks about his ex whenever we see her. (We go out dancing quite often.) I know he still quite isn't over her and he REALLY isn't trying to hide the fact when his face burns red and steam comes out of his ears when he sees her out with other guys.
He tries to act unphased, but his jealousy is so blatent to me. Why is that? It's been over a year, and obviously she's moved on effortlessly. Why can't he?
This unrequited love b*tter is starting to piss me off, because it's slowly creeping up on me. We've been close friends for a few years now, and we've been intimate in every way EXCEPT sexual, which always suited me just fine.
But now, I can't help but think "Why is he still chasing after scrap metal when he's got a gold mine sittin right in front of him?" "Why does he call me every day, wanting to spend all his waking hours with me and not feel the least bit of attraction?"
I'm not unattractive by any means, and he's told me time after time that he thinks I'm beatiful and that he loves me. So for a sign that's supposedly supposed to be "one of the most sexually charged signs of the zodiac," he seems to be quite the cold fish.

Ah well. It's always the one that doesn't want you back, isn't it? At least, that's how it's always been for me. And with just my luck, I've got another love sick puppy on my tail now. But he JUST ISN'T WHAT I WANT. I want my scorpio. I want him to snap out of it, and come to his senses (in other words... come to me.) I want this ridiculous chain to break off.
I can't just end the friendship because it's such a good one, but I can't keep this up much longer. I'm starting to feel drained emotionally. He demands so much in that aspect, and for a Cap, that's hard to give without wanting more.

Wait a second... that's not what I typed. I didn't say b*tter, I said butter.

Who did that?

Coming from a Scorpio, some advice...you're just going to have to "let" him get over her in his own time. When we are still hung up on someone, there is no one else who will satisfy us the way we think the person we're hung up on could. Whether he's erroneous in thinking that, who's to know. But no attempt to capture his romantic attentions will work at this point, because he is obviously obsessed with the object of his affections. And at this point, he is more likely to fool around with you or sleep with you without emotions, in an effort to both get back at her and also to get over her. So tread carefully, because even if it seems he's sexually attracted to you, if you let things take off on a physical level at this point, you are likely to get hurt. And it's possible he's trying to keep from hurting you by not pursuing you romantically, because he knows right now it would be for the wrong reasons.

and curse words are filtered on this site (butter is a filter word)

You could be right, but as far as getting back at her... he's got other girls he uses for that. He dates with them (sometimes at the same time and they don't even know it) and laughs it off. He likes to play with them sexually and then once he's had them, he forgets about them.
I don't know how they put up with it, but I've always been the one he couldn't have. I don't think he would ever "fool around" with me without being emotionally involved because we're so close, but hey, maybe I'm wrong.

He's just NOT attracted to me. Plain and simple, is what I think, so I really need to get a life and move on. There's plenty of good looking men out there, besides him, that won't keep me as his surrogate girlfriend or woman-in-waiting and cling to me without really wanting me. I just haven't found him yet.

I always seem to give myself advice when I post to message boards. Why is that? I do appreciate the response, though Pheonix. Your words are helpful.

when you move on and he realizes that, then he will gain interest in you. its always the ones that we can't have.

its his loss.

i have gone through it.

thanks M ayson,

I think everyone in the world has gone through it. I was just hoping for a Harry and Sally ending, I guess, even though I think movies with endings like that should be banned, (they make it seem almost possible that things work out that way in real life...)

Anyway, I don't want him to gain interest when I've moved on. I wont want him back. Why do we do that? Want what we can't have, I mean. It just sucks, doesn't it?

It's the oldest dilemma in history. Shakespeare wouldn't have been half as famous if it didn't exist. Poets and screenplay writers would be at a major loss for material. And love psychics, like the infamous Miss Cleo, would be out of business.
Oh wait, she is out of business, isn't she?

When Harry Met Sally is one of my favorite movies, and it took me a long time to realize that exact scenario was never going to happen to me. 😢 (sniffle, sniffle)lol...it took a Capricorn male friend of mine counseling me about this to make me see it, strangely enough. Caps are pretty realistic (though sometimes pessimistic), so this is a trait that should serve you well in life hapiCap. Just remember that there are a zillion fish in the sea, don't get too hung up on the one out of those zillion that you seem unable to get.