Taurus guys please help with my situation :(

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Scorp79nov
@Scorp79nov
11 Years

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I am very sorry for the long story but I really appreciate who reads and offers some insight.....So I met a Taurus guy online. for the most part it took off really fast..Hes 32 im 34. I did enjoy the conv we had and ofcourse attracted to him. He was asking tons of questions and eager to spend time together and making a point to call or text regularly. He also shared some personal info...and kept telling me he cares for me a lot. After the first date..we ended up going on a 2nd the next day. Then prob two days later during the week he came to my place to just hang out and chat. The next time I saw him was prob 4 days later and I lost control and we went to the bedroom. I felt it was soon but I just couldn't take it...the passion was just unbearable. but ok...there didn't seem to be any prob...he still kept wanting to see me...anf in the time of 3wks everything was so nice sharing stories, getting dinner, pizza, drinks, and again he was always touching me, kissing me, making me laugh occasionally call me sweetie, or hun and sharing a few personal stories about his family or friends with me. I mean I found it surprising he would tell me things like he lost a very close aunt to cancer and he doesn't have the best connection with his parents and sharing stories about his friends. I figured he was comfortable since he shared such details. Throughout this span of time I would try to subtly return the affection to show him I cared and was interested. I was a little spooked when I would say "I miss ya"...and sometimes I would get "miss ya too" and sometimes nothing. I didn't bring any attention to it and tried going with the flow of ups and downs. And then my mother passed away. Well he came to comfort me that night and my head spun as I saw a different side of him when he wanted to make me feel better and I cant say anything else but he pulled out the romance and totally truly made love to me. I cant say that any other way. He took his time and made for dame sure i would stop crying and forget my sadness for a short time. Well i did...and i forgot my name. And i thought that everything was fine until things started to get distant a few days later...as he drifted away with lest texting and calling. I let an entire night go by before i texted him the next day and said good morning and the conv was a little cold. I let it go as i had arrangements to make and family things to do. Well i waited until that night and couldn't help my frustration...i texted him "well I ho
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@TaurusLovesScorpio
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We'll need the rest of the story. So far it sounds like all he did was not contact you less for a few days, then maybe not at all for a day? He could easily have gotten busy. He could've felt that he really comforted/satisfied you so tremendously that one night, that it would be enough to hold you over during that time. Hard to tell....Main thing is to ask him what happened, if his feelings changed, etc. Seems doubtful that they would....
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Scorp79nov
@Scorp79nov
11 Years

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.....I am so sorry as I really need help with this...I didn't know it was cut off...please stay tuned so I can tell you the most important part...the end...will type more later...and thank you guys for all your help...I really appreciate it cause I am really confused and distraught what to do. Btw...I do understand the background of Taurus traits as I have spent a whole week researching all the info and reading dozens of other peoples stories....be back a little later...tank you again.
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@TaurusLovesScorpio
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Posted by Scorp79nov
.....I am so sorry as I really need help with this...I didn't know it was cut off...please stay tuned so I can tell you the most important part...the end...will type more later...and thank you guys for all your help...I really appreciate it cause I am really confused and distraught what to do. Btw...I do understand the background of Taurus traits as I have spent a whole week researching all the info and reading dozens of other peoples stories....be back a little later...tank you again.



If you can, get his full natal chart info., and your's as well....It'll help.
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@TaurusLovesScorpio
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Posted by jeannegrey
Posted by Scorp79nov
....please stay tuned so I can tell you the most important part...the end...will type more later...and thank you guys for all your help...I really appreciate it cause I am really confused and distraught what to do.



I wouldn't be so grateful just yet .... jus sayin'... lol 😉
click to expand




Don't listen to jeanne...I'm her personal guru.
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Scorp79nov
@Scorp79nov
11 Years

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...2 cont...so i was frustrated and i texted him " I was hopin that we talked more than we did this wknd & im sorry but i cant help to think i did something to change ur interest suddenly. I didnt meant to but im sorry if i did. I do realize ur busy & i hope everything is ok. Again im so glad i got to meet u and spend a lot of wonderful time w u. Thank you so much." The nxt morn i get a response "Hey, you need to understand why im trying to be distant. Its not because im not interested, not even close. I think I caught u at the worst time possible w the loss of ur mom. You need support that i just dont know how to give w what has happened to u. Yes, ur amazing and so beautiful, but i just think u need time to grasp this new reality of not having ur mom any longerbefore working on a relationship. We became sorta close to one another really quick and thats not necessarily bad, and the worst happened to u and I think u need time to deal with it. Yes, I miss you." So i called him to explain that i didnt want him to go away and i enjoy spending time with him and i dont need him to lean on because i have friends and family for that. I said i wanted to keep going as we are. He said he didnt expect that he understod what i was saying. The next 2 or 3 days picked up as normal conv and then started to drop again. I wanted to see him so i sent a msg that i was done work early and hes welcome to come but if he was too tired its ok and call when hes finished. I get a msg " It sucks cause i sooo badly want to come down and visit you in the worst way. However i know if i do I would want to sleep over and hold u all night and i never wake up early enough." (hes done it before. why not now?)........cont
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Scorp79nov
@Scorp79nov
11 Years

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....3 cont...so the next day i decided to text him just to feel it out "good morning 🙂 wish i was kissing you right now 🙂" he says "hey there, yes that does sound nice..." kinda chilly of him...so i wait a few hrs and then turn up the heat and tell him i cant wait to cuddle with him its the greatest feeling blah blah. No response. I let hrs go by into the eve. Mind u i have been looking online to see how much he goes on during this whole 3 wks...which is very rare. sometimes he wouldnt go on for a day or two. So after yet again my patience fails...i text "Ok you win. I give up." The next day is the cremation service. I didnt expect to hear anything...although any real caring person would of said hey are you ok...im here if u need or some damn thing. So i do all that. Rough day. Its now into that eve and I text " I want to apologize for being emotional and frustrated. I am sorry. I was trying to talk w u yest and it was hard on me that u didnt respond. Everything is wrapped up here and was a rough day. I would love to see u and miss u alot but i realize u may not want to speak w me or see me in which case i need to say thank u as i met the sweetest guy and had a wonderful time together." ....cont
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Scorp79nov
@Scorp79nov
11 Years

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...4 cont...He says " I bet u did have a bad day. This is why i say i just caught u at a bad time. " I said " I told u i dont want u to go away" "so will u stay? talk?"..."sure but for the next hr ill be drivin w two guy from work . Lol so i can text away at the moment."..."I know u are driving, i didnt mean this second..i meant will u call when u finish?"......"Yeah, we can talk for sure. Lol, cause tomrw im headed down to **** w a few guys from the team for Sunday's race"...."ok call when u finish up"....So I wait 3 hrs and call him. No answer. Didnt leave a msg. 4 days later i call and leave an up beat msg.."Hey stranger just thinking about u..how are u? ok gimme a call."....2 days later I text "Hmm i sure can start a business with all the space u provided me. Hope u are doing well. I wanted to say im sorry if i caused ur distance from me as i am ver confused about it. I must say i enjoyed your great qualites and cant forget the time we spent together. Things are wrapped up and back in order. I dont mind at all if things go slow...I hope to talk with you again."...4 days later he says "hey there, are u having any luck online?"...24 hrs later i say "i wouldnt exactly call it luck" 2hrs later he says "well, then what would you call it?..lol" 2hrs later "Plenty of decption"....cont
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Scorp79nov
@Scorp79nov
11 Years

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...5 cont..the next morn he satarts small talk...Hows the coffee this morn...hows this hows that...hows the car. I kept everything short and sweet. Then he says " I know we've been distant, but if ur wearing those dress pants to work today a pic would be nice. " I said " haha sorry u picked the wrong day...they are tomrw 🙂 " and then i said "i didnt know a pic was better than the real thing" ...he said "its not." I said"well thats good to know." then more small tal a little bout work and dumb stuff. He mentioned having breakfast so i said "mmm sound yummy" He teased back....." ya cant talk to me that way" I said oh im sorry i dont know the rules and regulations lol...and he said "ya cant be talking sexy today cause im wearing fitted shorts...(blah blah u get it).....so u cant be gettin me all excited" I said " oh so it wouldnt be wise to tell u how nmuch i miss ur kisses" ..."and not a day goes by i dont think of the night u made me forget my name 🙂"....he said "i thoroughly agree. i always loved fn ur brains out equally as much as making slow sweet love to you." I said "i didnt know that. thank you for telling me"...8hrs later...he says "are you serious when you miss my kisses??"...i said "yes"...he said "i like that"...I said "maybe u would like to call sometime"...he said "sure i would. How have things been going?"...so i said a few shor things and "how have u been doing? Are u finding luck online?" He said "actually things are pretty good. And no, im done with the online rat race"....(yea...hes been online a great deal lately....like a lot...I feel like sayin hows the rat race? catch any rats?....so the next morning he says "so am i getting a pic on dress pants day or what!?"...i said " lol guess u didnt forget...thats all ya want...sure i can send a pic for you"...so i sent a pic of the outfit...he said "yep...thats you. Nice,ty."....cont
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Scorp79nov
@Scorp79nov
11 Years

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...So thats been it. I cant get over how much we talked and shared and incinuations of going to different places in the future and him sharing that he met a nice girl to his friends and and just personal family info. He shared that he lost an aunt ot cancer and he was closer to her than his own mother. Shared that he doesnthave a very tight connection w his parents. Talked about his sister and hopes i get to meet them one day...just all these little conversations took place. One time he said I really care for you and i dont knoe if u beleive me. I said i can see it. He said good. Another ocassion he said well this is the firs sat in a while we didnt spend together..hows that sit w you...i said how does it sit with you? He said i really about you...i said i care very much for you too. I just cant imagine all that for some a**. Im sorry. Did he get sppoked and use the death in my family to take some space for himself? Did he just lose interest and didnt know how to tell me? Did he pop back up to see if i would be a potential booty call? wtf? I dont rest...and im ready to take the paint off the walls wondering. Should i reach out to him and let him know how i feel about him? Is it worth the risk? Do i just wait a bit to see what happens? I just cant even tell. Again I am sorry for such the saga...im sure none of you wanted to read for days...but it was important to me to provide everything i can so someone can let me know if im crackin up or just give up. Thank you so much....the end lol
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@TaurusLovesScorpio
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This dude is a bit suspect IMO. After that love-making session, I think, even though he does seem to like you, he is a little cocky. Its a conquest thing....Part of him wants to retire champ. I'd just ignore him for a while if I were you. I understand you're vulnerable right now, and its actually wise of him to say it really *isn't* the best time to start a relationship. But that's a little *too* convenient and practical on his part; you guys slept together, you shared a good deal, I think he owes you, as a person, a little more than how he's been acting.

If I were you I would withdraw a bit. See what he does.
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Scorp79nov
@Scorp79nov
11 Years

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...yes we met online and know each other a little over a month. Ok I guess reaching out and exposing my feelings wont help so ill just stay quiet. And ya what can I say...ya I fell in love..kill me lol it happens. Im just so frustrated that the man cant even realize and get his head out of his ass. I truly thought he would see we have some common veiws and qualities to build on. Maybe its in the back of his mind. Idk. I have no idea if im something or nothing. Thank u for ur support and comments 🙂
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Astrobyn
@Astrobyn
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OMG... ok wait, I responded to this thread way to early, before I could realize that it is was way too emotionally advanced for my moon.


You can't expect him to feel the way you feel.. You've made so many unfair statement here. You have these lofty expectations of him, that he's telling you flat out he can't live up to. That's pretty fair.

I am sorry about your mother. And what happen between you and him wasn't anyone's fault but you both were in a situation of emotional manipulation. This bond was forced out of a need in that moment. And that's way too fucking fast for a bull.

No matter how great it was or how it felt, he see's it a lie. He doesn't feel those things for you personally, this was an act of kindness and love for another human being who was hurting and needed comfort. And no it was not about him using a situation to fuck you.

But now there is all this pressure and expectations, and he has no idea if it can be maintained because what you do have right now, is built on quick sand. And he needs a stable foundation.

You are contradicting yourself. You say you have other people you don't need him for emotional support and what not, but then your texts and actions send a completely co-dependent message. And I actually see you lying to yourself and making these excuses to try and rationalize your irrational feelings to feed what you want and need right now.

But your not truly and honestly taking any of his wants or needs into consideration at this time, your listening and seeking just enough information, to appease him and get what you want. But that will never work.


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Scorp79nov
@Scorp79nov
11 Years

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Jeannegray...agreed w tauruslovesscorpio? ...wasnt sure just askin🙂....and btw I know im gonna gett hammered...but I initiated contact yest 😢 (I know!) ..I sai "hey sorry to bother u...I was hoping to share something important w u..would u like to get some dinner?"
Him: did u get my msg I sent the other day after u sent ur pics?
Me: no, what else did u send?
He fwd the msg..it was an inside juoke we shared about someone I worked with and playful joke he knows I laugh about.
Me: omg haha no I didnt get that one.. (then I joked back)
Me: so would u like to grab dinner?
Him: yes I would, though it wouldnt be for tonight cause im out in ***
Me: lol I didnt forget ur sched 🙂 ...I know its a long day...just thought I would have luck to ask 🙂


And no response. Yes I know im am being a real nut. This is killin me. He initiated contact after disap for a wk...and then I didnt get a text and thought he dropped for two days so I initiated contact yest...im doing things goin out with friends and doing my own thing...but im goin nuts tryin to make sense of all this. One thing that I just cant get over is what an awful lot of blasted feelings and sharing to just pull the plug because of a death. And if the guy is still making contact and answering me when I text...theres got to be aome interest?? Im afraid to ask what u all think...please be gentle on me lol
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Scorp79nov
@Scorp79nov
11 Years

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...and one more thing..wouldnt he say something to let me know theres no interest or im just a friend? Theres been no indication unless im missing it or hes unsure and just thinking....I tell him maybe he would like to call some time and he says sure he would but continues texting...I ask if he would like to get dinner and he say yes he would but hes out of town for work.....well he made every attempt to do these thongs before.
—?? Idk. This is the most confusing man I ever met.
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Astrobyn
@Astrobyn
11 Years1,000+ Posts

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Just gonna quote myself, I feel like it applies...

Posted by Astrobyn
Taurus can be pretty fucking dense when it comes to the matters of the heart. They only trust the truest of feelings that develop over long stretches of time. They can feel what your feeling, the moments of passion and desire, but after the moment has passed they ignore them. They enjoy and indulge in it while its in front of them, but they don't put much serious stock into them after that, because they feel there is little true value too it.

Now a lot of people can day dream, let these feelings fester until you start to believe something different. But see... the influence of the Taurus can gives the person the strength to shake off anything impractical.

And when I say they are pretty fucking dense, I mean that they expect everyone else to have the same understanding and feelings about these fleeting moments. And are pretty confused when you try to get them to comprehend anything different.

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@TaurusLovesScorpio
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Male bulls are often plagued by guilt, or have a strong need to be perceived as the good guy. So its very hard to distinguish between friendship and genuine romantic interest at SOME points in relationship with a bull. We don't do Pisces moves like act crazy in order to turn you off, to avoid hurting you emotionally. We'll try to maintain a friendship, which we don't realize, often hurts you worse. It can also be hard for a bull to tell within *themselves* whether or not there is genuine romantic interest. It takes *time* with us. So in one sense, it can only be a good thing that you continue to maintain contact with him. Comfort is important with us and the longer we're around you, the more that develops, the feelings start to grow organically, etc. But with your situation, the guilt he's feeling over *potentially* misleading you or hurting you worse, during this time of grief, may be what's confusing him, causing the separation. In fact, according to his words, that's a big part of it. And we are usually pretty straightforward.

That's not to say he isn't interested. He probably (I'd say definitely IMO) is, just bc of how strong the attraction obviously is, the fact that you're a Scorp, etc. Its going to take time though, and you need to not come on too strong. Don't show all your cards all at once. Scorps like a little mystery in their men, give him the same, especially with how he's acting thus far. You folks have an intuition about potential mates (which no amount of advice from the Taurus board is going to steer you off course from), and you tend to just *know* (or at least feel you do), and are thus emotionally ready, sooner than others (espec. bulls). So don't make the mistake of assuming he moves at your pace, and is treating you poorly, then get offended/hurt, and then decide to pull back later when he finally comes around. I've seen this a lot with Taurus/Scorp. Its the push/pull thing that happens with opposites.
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lnana04
@lnana04
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You don't have to answer this, but have you given yourself time after your moms passing? I'm sorry to hear about what happened btw, but if you haven't, maybe he's a bit hesitant and weirded out that you aren't taking time for yourself. I'm not a Taurus, but I'm an earth sign and I honestly would back off a little if a person was trying to message me right after a time like that.
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@TaurusLovesScorpio
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As far as your bull being confusing, not necessarily. As has been said, Scorpio often projects a good deal of complexity onto Taurus, and realizes as a much later date it was their own creation. Scorpio tends to see things as having more complex explanations, IMO, bc you folks tend to have such a volatile and complex inner emotional life, and project a lot. Taurus (and most scientists/philosophers, see "Ockham's Razor")tend to prefer simpler explanations for even complex phenomena. Every person has depth and mystery to an extent, but again, we're straightforward (***generally***) in our communication, and even moreso in our actions. Once you figure out how we test, it can be pretty easy to read our intentions even in that case, which I think is an example of Taurus being a bit secretive/manipulative.
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@TaurusLovesScorpio
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Posted by lnana04
You don't have to answer this, but have you given yourself time after your moms passing? I'm sorry to hear about what happened btw, but if you haven't, maybe he's a bit hesitant and weirded out that you aren't taking time for yourself. I'm not a Taurus, but I'm an earth sign and I honestly would back off a little if a person was trying to message me right after a time like that.



This is very true. And that is pretty much what he's indicating he's fearing in his communication. You're hurting right now and using him to cope, could very well hurt the relationship later, be a major source of disillusionment, keep you from *really* getting to know each other, etc. It can be a source of rushing into things emotionally for *both* parties - you because you are hurting and seeking comfort, him because he feels compassionate/sorrowful and wants to be that comfort. There's nothing wrong with this kind of behavior - we lean on, and often carry, one another and should. But it can be a bad way to *start* a relationship. Why not just keep it light, maintain a friendship, and build from there? As a bull, my best relationships have developed this way anyway.
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@TaurusLovesScorpio
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Posted by TaurusLovesScorpio
Why not just keep it light, maintain a friendship, and build from there? As a bull, my best relationships have developed this way anyway.



To build on this, there's another reason I'd say this is the course to go with this guy. From his texts, you've got an extremely horny bull on your hands. No surprise again given the Taurus/Scorp thing. But I think, having talked to a lot of people in this Taurus/Scorp thing, the bulls (usually unaware of the kind of connections that can occur at an energetic level), feeling the strong connection/pull in this pairing, OFTEN pass it off as MOSTLY sexual. Its easy to do that from our end, bc Scorps naturally give off such an intense sexual energy anyway. That is REALLY dangerous to this pairing IMO. Now is a good time to slow things down, and focus on the friendship and emotional portion of the connection in order to remedy that. *You* have to have self control in order to do that. You kinda have to be in control of the whole situation, and really, CAN you do that? Because he's a really horny dude and is going to charge you physically in your presence, and you're going to really struggle with that.
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Scorp79nov
@Scorp79nov
11 Years

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Well thats what I wanted to know...more detailed opininions...thank u so much. I wasnt sure if it was worth even keeping a connetion. Given all the details on my story it was so hard to believe there was absolutely nothing. I liked reading tauruslovesscorpios insight...it helped me understand a little better. And yes...this guy was very affectionate with me and wanted to know everything about me and asked a lot of questions...not only personal friends and family stuff..he was very sexual...very...so after every encounter he would ask if I liked it or if it was something we should never try again. I was actually taken back by his overwhelming concern to please me however he could and I did tell him it was sweet of him and I liked his concern.
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Scorp79nov
@Scorp79nov
11 Years

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...and to be truly honest I did have time to mourn and I personally was never the person to need a lot of time in those situations..I dont exactly dwell on those things..I tend to move on quickly..and also I explained to him that I didnt have a very deep connection w my mom. Sorry..but we didnt talk much. I def would say if it was my dad it would be much harder. So thank u again for all ur help. If some of u feel its better to keep the friendly connection then I will. One thing...do I let him initiate convos? And do I keep it short friendly and sweet? Can I ever kinda poke at him..." just thinkin of u" or "hope ur having a good day" ? Just wondered. I also wonder....lol w such a horny guy on my hands its hard to believe he doesnt have anything else goin on....kills me to think and accept but ill practice my patience lol I am really glad I came here for some help. Without peiple like u to help I would be so much worse.. at least I feel a little better knowing something. 🙂
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Scorp79nov
@Scorp79nov
11 Years

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So just an update for feed back...
After texting him on a fri nght asking him to get dinner...and he said he was out of town for work. I said..i didnt forget ur sched...i know its a long day just thought i would have luck to ask. I dropped back and basically disappeared. 2 days go by and i get a text on a sunday night:
Him: Hey, good weekend, bad weekend?
Me: Hey you 🙂 it was alright...ive had better 😉how are you doing??
Him: Not bad. lol i sense drama in ur last response??...
Me: lol no drama. Everything is ok. Just sayin ive had better ones😉
Him: then why wouldn't ya have called me? lol
Me:I was hoping u would do the same..it seems we think the same thing quite often🙂 i am just wrapping up w my dad ..will it be ok to call u in a bit?
Him:Oh? Sorry to bug ya. Im just goin to pick up a salad. Have fun w him, talk later.
Me: u didnt bug me. Is it ok to call ya in a bout an hour?
Him: Yup

So i called. Kept it casual...he wanted to know what i have been up to...i rattled of spending time w dad, friends, backyard bbqs..and then he started to take initiative and say"i cant believe u didnt invite me for coffee"...and asking what i was doing...is it alright if he visitis...i said sure u can visit. He comes over. not very affectionate. I gave him a hug. It seems almost forced. He said i see ur angry with me. I just said no and moved on to another subject. we sat and chatted for a while and then he ended up slithering his way in the bedroom...i was then alarmed like oh here we go...thats all u cam for...so i felt it out...he did start w the kissing and all that...and no doubt he sensed my hesitation..it felt like he smoothed it over by saying he just wanted to come and hug me and hold me. I felt like ok...lets see...it wasnt long before he started again and i pulled away and said "im sorry but my head is just racing"
Him: u want me to anser ur questions?
Me: ...ok
Him: No, i didnt go with anyone, didnt even kiss anyone, nothin like that...
Me: (sigh) well u know i am cautous, take care of myself and these days worry about my safety...
Him: thats what i like about you...
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Scorp79nov
@Scorp79nov
11 Years

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...so kissing statred back up...and (sorry but) oral activity took place but no intercourse. We fell asleep and in the morning i woke him up...it felt like he didnt want to be bothered. He seemed in a hurry to go. He said he didnt want to kiss me because of bad breath...asked if i mind if he skipped coffee. so i just played it cool. He did talk to me later that day and mentioned sorry he was in a hurry...he had an appt coming for work. It wasnt that he didnt want to kiss me or have coffee w me. so im thinking yea ok...his behavior is so different now i am so confused. So i let about 2 days go by...and called him during work to tell him i wanted to share my thoughts....
He statred small talk asking me anout work and making som e inside jokes we share...
I finally was able to just tell him i was a bit confused as to what we are and that i wasnt sure if i was a friend or FWB...if he is comfortable or not comfortable with me...and i got kinda cut off his words were a little jumbled...but basically he did say in the conversation..."well i dont move as fast as you do" and "just relax". I told him i realize i am fast and im used to fast but i dont meant to overwhelm him w that and im trying to meet in the middle with all this...
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Scorp79nov
@Scorp79nov
11 Years

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I did tell hime i was confortable with him and it would hurt too much to be FWB and i dont do that kinda thing with anyone cause its not my thing. I mentioned that i just wanted to let him know how i was feeling and its been on my mind because i was confused that i dont see him as much anymore and things like that. He mentioned that he figured he would omit himself from a very crutial situation i had happenen im life and he didnt know what to do and didnt know the family...and a bunch of jumble i didnt quite get. He did say " now dont take this the wrong way but u sorta tend to be a little clingy" "now stop and think about it before you answer"...i didnt offer much response except "oh" So he kinda wrapped that up and switch subjects and said ya know you can text me all ya want, which he say quite often...and i said u can also text me too..lol i started to bust him and say well i do text you and ask u to call me or get dinner and i dont get to far...lol...he paused with a long silence and said...anyway...good taling to u thanks for calling me...
After we hung up...i text him a msg about kinda a joke about work...he asked what was going on...i said well..this that...and after all this crazy stuff "i need a massage and a cocktail"
Later that night i get a text:
Him: Well i hope those needs stay w u until the next time we are together....
Me: me too 🙂

The next morn...
Him: Oh I'm sorry, good morning to you.
(figured he was busting me as if he didnt check in)
Me: hahah very funny. Good morning to u too 🙂

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Scorp79nov
@Scorp79nov
11 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 24 · Topics: 1
The next evening...
Him: lol, so if ur beginning to see other people, does that mean we're not allowed to get together and hang out?
Me:Are you seeing other people?
Him: Fck no. I sit home almost every night.
Him: Just sayin if u are, does that mean we can't get together?
Me: see other people? I dont have a switch to just turn off my feelings like that....
Him: oh? I just havent heard much out of u lately, so i figured u got busy?
Me: lol, i thought the same of u..im not that busy...know u can always call me...i wont bite 🙂...and to answer u.. yes, i would like to hang out w u.
Him: well good....
Hours later I sent him a pretty pic (selfie lol)
...nothing

So he did say in our pevious phone conv... "no ur not fwb..i dont like that its childish...for kids". i said" well i just wanted to let u know how i was feeling and just wanted to talk to you about it"...He tells me im a little clingy...and then says he hasnt heard much from me. Wtf? Is this a test? Is it stringing? 3 wks of blast and i have a death in the family and he dies—? So is he trying to see if im seeing anyone or is he trying to say he doesnt care if i do and still want to hang out? Am i a friend? He knows i dont want to be fwb...so wtf is the subliminal message im missing here?? I took the advice and kept the connection going and tried to play it cool the best i can...and honestly i would not mind to have him in my life as a friend than not at all...keeping in mind that a friendship can have potential to develop...but im so confused if he has stepped back to start over more slowly and is not conveying that or testing me...or just playing a game....Need a little help here :o
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Scorp79nov
@Scorp79nov
11 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 24 · Topics: 1
Update:

So after I sent the pic fri nght....on sat I was bad (Iknow!)..I initiated text...
Me: hello? Is this thing on? Was my pic that bad? lol
Hey Girl, I've always said *** takes the best pic goin...lol. How the hell are ya?
Me: Lmao, there u go again...nobody took that. Im good thank you 🙂 how are u doing?
1 hr later (he was working)

Him: Im ok, finishing up for the day. you?
Me: Almost finished w some errands & then just relax a little.
Me: lol and I heard the cutest song...*** its such a cute story 🙂)
Him: Oh yeah. Its new by ***. I like it too. So you are listening....
Me: Yes I listen. I figured id tune in a little 🙂
Few hrs later....

Him: Are you gonna be out and about tonight?
Me: I haven't decided what im doin yet. Do u have something in mind?
Him: Might...I said might...go to a picnic w a bro in law. But not set in stone yet..was wondering if u were gonna be out and id maybe meet you?
Me: Sure I can meet you...were to thinkin of a certain place? Or the place by my house? not sure whats easier, what do u think?
Him: I don't know!...bro in law bought me a ticket to a picnic...don't wanna go....
ME: lol well im not sure what to tell ya...he got it for u ...maybe u can go for a short while...but its up to u 🙂
Him: That's the Fn problem, it wont be a short while...I just know it?
Me: oh. Well I cant tell ya what to do...but I think I know if u don't wanna do something u wont...and whatever u decide is fine 🙂
I was trying to get ready and run around and ofcourse I didn't have patience cause I wanted to know whats goin on)
Me: So did ya come up with a plan? 🙂
Him: Goin to this clam bake thing. I'll be texting you all ya want....
Me Textin all I want? lol What do you mean?

And now dead for two days now! I know what I am gonna hear....but am I nuts— Ever since the death in the fam...he pulled out...but still texts here and there. I mentioned having dinner a few times and got politely turned down. Told him how I felt about FWB...that it hurts too much...he confirmed I wasn't and to just relax. Tells me a can be a little clingy so I drop off the earth and two days later hes texting he hasn't heard from me. WTF— yet again I tell him he can call....but does he ever pick up the phone? No! But he is texting...and now maybe meet up and then what he changed his mind? Was it a test? I try staying off the radar not bugging him...but I also was trying to balance showing him consistent interest....I don't know maybe im doin
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Scorp79nov
@Scorp79nov
11 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 24 · Topics: 1
So while im waiting this BULL out..lol

I meant to ask TLS what do you mean when u say "part of him wants to retire"? And also if I might pick ur brain a little...my thoughts have me crazy levitating w frustration...

So I met a wonderful guy and connected quite quickly...everything seems great as he was always wanting to talk and text and take me out...and besides the steamy sexual connection, he shared stories about family, friends, just personal little things, suggested we should go a few places in the future...and then death in the family and he pulls the plug. I don't know how much closer you can get to perfect when theres a great connection, laughing, sharing, same age, both no kids, both same views on some topics...and now kinda dead. All his words burn thru my head everyday.."i really care for you. I don't know if u believe me" and many other things that leave me like wtf? just omg wtf? I still see him sporatically online still but might it ever cross the idiots mind that he had something good to work from ...and why on earth put that extreme effort in just for one thing? I'll never understand the 3wks of a romantic novel on Blast he did... so...

Am I the safe ace in the hole?
Is he gonna take time to prove to himself the grass is not really greener?

If he pops up again is there a certain way I can go about letting him understand his Houdini act hurts and im not a friggin layaway plan— Either he wants to be serious or not.

And I haven't initiated any contact or heard anything since Saturday...and for me that's trying hard lol....but thank you for letting me release here 🙂
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Scorp79nov
@Scorp79nov
11 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 24 · Topics: 1
So since last sat when he was gonna maybe meet up w me and then backed out of it...I havent heard anything. I am goin insane. I havent initiated contact amd I want to so bad for miliion unanswered questions! This is so terrible...everything was left open and just hanging! I am always burning with thoughts of wtf happened? What did I do? He cant just communicate he lost interest? When he pops up with texts I tell him to call me but he doesnt. I just cant process all the effort...all the words...everything on blast to just pull the plug w/o saying anything. I wanna call and say like what are u doing here...what is this. I directly asked if I was fwb...he says no and to relax. I know its only been a week which is prob nothin to him...but given all his actions...if he didnt plan on ever talkin to me again wouldnt he have said its not workin for him...lets be friends...I dont want a relationshp..something? He said none of that. Is this waiting normal? Maybe he has strong feelings and doesnt know what to do about it? How the hell does somebody go from wanting to spend so much time together and talk to not wanting to contact at all— Sorry im just completely up the walls but I didnt contact him...just popping blood vessels everyday 😢