Taurus male eager to set up dates etc but only sends one or two texts per day

Profile picture of AngieLove
AngieLove
@AngieLove
7 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 6 · Topics: 3
Hi all,

Met a taurus male (cancer moon, mercury venus and aries mars) recently online. We are both in our mid-20s. He was very eager to meet up and has taken me out on 3 dates to nice places after chatting online for about 3 or so days.. he'd bring me little gifts like chocolates etc. and seemed very eager, always arranging to see me again right at the end of each date and if anything, wanting to hang out even more frequently than I do.. but recently, he's very very quiet.. he has a lot on with working on presentations (he's a uni lecturer) but it's not a full time thing and I know he also goes to the gym every day.. he'll ask me how I am and I'll answer within 20 mins and he'll take another 7 hours to reply.. this is on whatsapp (I can see his last online and he hasn't been online during that time so not exactly ignoring me), he only seems to be on whatsapp for 2 or 3 mins, 4 or 5 times a day, that's it.

In the past, I've only ever dated gemini guys who were insanely chatty and would send over a 100 texts each day totalling to several thousand by the end of the relationship.. I mentioned one of my ex sending over 11,000 texts during the time I was with him and he seemed surprised and said he probably hasn't even sent that many texts in total over his whole life, let alone to one person...I did mention a few times, I didn't like guys being all clingy and controlling over texts as my exes tended to go overkill on texting so maybe he took a hint from that & backed off? (I wouldn't have said it if I knew he'd hardly text) I'm not sure really.. he is very ambitious and has achieved more than people double his age would have achieved...

Is it a case of slow & steady wins the race (typical taurus way) or he's not too serious about us? Anyone have any stories of things starting off super slow and becoming serious eventually?

Despite his cancerian moon, he always seemed super arrogant (in a positive way lol) and confident so I don't think it's a shy thing.. but he's only dated a handful of people before me.. he says. He also said for the first 3-4 months, it's just "seeing each other" and not officially bf/gf which is fair enough but I'm so used to every guy I've been with bugging me with 100s of silly texts per day so I'm not sure what's normal anymore?

Profile picture of AngieLove
AngieLove
@AngieLove
7 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 6 · Topics: 3
Posted by tiziani
If you value texts as a sign of attention and he does not then it's just a difference between how you both see things.

I would say don't let anxiety screw it up but failing that, talk with each other about it assuming you're both wanting to be in a relationship.
Thank you for your post - yeah that makes sense - weird that every guy I've dated/who has tried to date me has always been constantly texting me so I thought that was what everyone did lol.

Is the communication thing now an issue given that I now know he's still using the online app where we met :/ I know people these days say you're allowed to do that until it's "exclusive" but to me, it seems so silly, like if you think the person is good enough to be exclusive with, you'd know (not for certain but have a pretty good idea) right from the date 1 or 2... seems odd that people may see you as "just ok" now and then decide months down the line, you're the "best"? I totally get people taking big commitments e.g. babies, marriage slowly but just to be exclusive? To me, you either want someone or you don't.. & so what if you go exclusive after date 1 or 2 and then after date 5, you decide it's not a good match.. it's hardly like having to get a divorce lol.
Profile picture of tiki33
tiki33
@tiki33
19 Years10,000+ Posts

Comments: 0 · Posts: 10616 · Topics: 40
Why would you disclose that kind of information about your exes and their texting habits? Seriously, don't do that again until you're out of the early stages of dating. You disclosed too much too soon to him. You said you don't like a clingy guy so he's demonstrating he's not the clingy type but you seem to have an issue with his not being clingy.

If this guy doesn't continue to pursue you it's because of you and what you said, can't fix it, just move on if it comes to that and learn how to be a bit more mindful of what you reveal and don't talk about other men to your current man. He really could've felt like his efforts will never be good enough if he's not text messaging you hundreds of times a day and lost his confidence.