Why is it so hard?

I am a Taurus and I don't know if any other Taurus has this problem. When I love someone I love hard and it's so difficult for me to move on and forget this person. I always have to go through this time if grieving like someone died. I can meet other people and go on dates but it means nothing. I just hate this about myself. Some people can move on with no problem and I just don't understand. Can someone help me understand why it's so hard.

Earth signs invest in people.

We aren't losing just this random person..we are losing our investment as well. And some of us end up questioning our sanity for the choices we made.

I agree with Damnata and I feel your pain, Sweets681!

I have DEFINITELY gone through this stage numerous times. I hate it as well. It has made me a lot more reluctant to be up-front with those emotions I'm feeling out of fear they will not be reciprocated, or worse--abused.

Things eventually get to a point where I'm thinking "this person is toxic to my normal, peaceful state of being. I feel like I can't live without them because I care so much and for whatever reason that care isn't being returned."

So yes, my Taurean Sun fully understands. It's hard because we are so cautious with...everything.
Even our caution can't save us sometimes 😢

Yes, another one here. I am exactly the same friend. We put some much in and feel like we get less than nothing out for our honest heartfelt effort.

It is not easy, I know, but it is part of who we are. I also hate this part. I have tried to embrace these loses (if you will) but it always hurts. Unrequited love is the worst. But you know what, the world won't find people more dedicated and rock solid, pardon the pun, then us. We are ourselves and we are true, we love with everything and we give everything despite being hurt time and time again. We take time to heal and then we don it again. Silly, aren't we?

But I don't think there is any better distribution of love than what we give to others. Don't hate your self, or this part of you, embrace it. It hurts and it sucks so damn bad, but if we don't go out and show people what caring, devotion, loyalty and love without limits really is, who will?

In the end, we do get hurt and we do heal... eventually... I know (Stuck in a bout atm 😢 ) but at the end of the day, who loses out?

We feel we do, but it is actually those who didn't appreciate what they had. And despite how we feel, somewhat insecure blaming ourselves sometimes for the lose and becoming insane, we aren't the problem, nor the solution. We are just a means to an end. People see you, learn to know you, love and then mistreat you. When the wheel turns, it will be us coming out stronger because of selflessness. Being selfish only serves ones demise...

You are not alone in this, I am the same. But instead of feeling busted and beaten again by the evilness of life, smile and take it in stride one day at a time. It sucks, but we are human and few if any are better at being this solid, this true, this caring, this loving, this dedicated, this loyal and this human than you. 😉

I am going through something very similar right now. Don't see it as something negative. We grow from every relationship that we invest in. We discover something new from every relationship. And like with everything new that we discover about ourselves, we need time to reflect on how it blends together with everything else that we knew until that point. It is also about the fact that we take time to strategize in our minds. We don't like making the same mistakes twice. So we take the time to pinpoint what went wrong...so we don't make the same mistake. At the same time, that gives us the chance to narrow down even more our preference...what it is that we are looking for. When we are done with that process, we come back new. No emotional baggage...no jading. We are ready to love again. And we go at it strong, because we aren't afraid to feel.

That's what makes us ..US...stable, emotionally mature, and loyal.

Hope this helps 🙂

Posted by OmagaIII
Yes, another one here. I am exactly the same friend. We put some much in and feel like we get less than nothing out for our honest heartfelt effort.

It is not easy, I know, but it is part of who we are. I also hate this part. I have tried to embrace these loses (if you will) but it always hurts. Unrequited love is the worst. But you know what, the world won't find people more dedicated and rock solid, pardon the pun, then us. We are ourselves and we are true, we love with everything and we give everything despite being hurt time and time again. We take time to heal and then we don it again. Silly, aren't we?

But I don't think there is any better distribution of love than what we give to others. Don't hate your self, or this part of you, embrace it. It hurts and it sucks so damn bad, but if we don't go out and show people what caring, devotion, loyalty and love without limits really is, who will?

In the end, we do get hurt and we do heal... eventually... I know (Stuck in a bout atm 😢 ) but at the end of the day, who loses out?

We feel we do, but it is actually those who didn't appreciate what they had. And despite how we feel, somewhat insecure blaming ourselves sometimes for the lose and becoming insane, we aren't the problem, nor the solution. We are just a means to an end. People see you, learn to know you, love and then mistreat you. When the wheel turns, it will be us coming out stronger because of selflessness. Being selfish only serves ones demise...

You are not alone in this, I am the same. But instead of feeling busted and beaten again by the evilness of life, smile and take it in stride one day at a time. It sucks, but we are human and few if any are better at being this solid, this true, this caring, this loving, this dedicated, this loyal and this human than you. 😉

OmagaIII,

I agree 100% !

Aren't we the best!

Hell yeah! 😛

It's a curse! I go thru the same aftermath over and over again...

You know....I used to think it the same way.

However, now I see it as a system of elimination! If we go through that, it means that the person wasn't the right one. He/She wasn't the ONE. Period.

We rebuild and we come back....stronger.

Posted by Sweets681
I am a Taurus and I don't know if any other Taurus has this problem. When I love someone I love hard and it's so difficult for me to move on and forget this person. I always have to go through this time if grieving like someone died. I can meet other people and go on dates but it means nothing. I just hate this about myself. Some people can move on with no problem and I just don't understand. Can someone help me understand why it's so hard.

Easy... Get yourself a damn hobby maybe take up song writing? Write songs about this person you miss and WHY you miss em.
Take up painting. Draw this person as you remember it and when you see something wrong about this person in the painting, emphasize on that in your music and maybe you will forget em for once and for all.

Thanks everyone for your feedback. It's really nice to know that I'm not the only one that feels thus way and that there are real, honest, loving, caring people such as myself.

@tsar322 I did not ask for a solution, I asked for a understanding. How do you know I don't have hobbies. Next time do not put your energy into being nasty to someone for no reason. If you're going to respond at least respond to what was asked. If you don't have anything nice to say don't say anything at all. Your feedback was not necessary, but thanks.

I've also found that making a person, or some representation of that person, a subject of artistic expression, helps me to heal.

I think this is one of the worst parts about being a Taurus - our inability to move on and let go. The first, for me, was the hardest though. Took years to truly get over it. Best thing that ever happened to me in retrospect though.

Posted by tsar322

Posted by Sweets681
I am a Taurus and I don't know if any other Taurus has this problem. When I love someone I love hard and it's so difficult for me to move on and forget this person. I always have to go through this time if grieving like someone died. I can meet other people and go on dates but it means nothing. I just hate this about myself. Some people can move on with no problem and I just don't understand. Can someone help me understand why it's so hard.

Easy... Get yourself a damn hobby maybe take up song writing? Write songs about this person you miss and WHY you miss em.
Take up painting. Draw this person as you remember it and when you see something wrong about this person in the painting, emphasize on that in your music and maybe you will forget em for once and for all.

click to expand

Hmph. Sick of ya lovesick puppies everywhere. You kno what? Im very comfortable with my mind. Thoughts clean and unclean, loving and the opposite of that but I'm no lovesick puppy like the rest of my generation cryin over the next person who dont give a damn about me? That is SICKEST of all things. Look to the present, not the past so you can make the future brighter!!!

Posted by OmagaIII
Yes, another one here. I am exactly the same friend. We put some much in and feel like we get less than nothing out for our honest heartfelt effort.

It is not easy, I know, but it is part of who we are. I also hate this part. I have tried to embrace these loses (if you will) but it always hurts. Unrequited love is the worst. But you know what, the world won't find people more dedicated and rock solid, pardon the pun, then us. We are ourselves and we are true, we love with everything and we give everything despite being hurt time and time again. We take time to heal and then we don it again. Silly, aren't we?

But I don't think there is any better distribution of love than what we give to others. Don't hate your self, or this part of you, embrace it. It hurts and it sucks so damn bad, but if we don't go out and show people what caring, devotion, loyalty and love without limits really is, who will?

In the end, we do get hurt and we do heal... eventually... I know (Stuck in a bout atm 😢 ) but at the end of the day, who loses out?

We feel we do, but it is actually those who didn't appreciate what they had. And despite how we feel, somewhat insecure blaming ourselves sometimes for the lose and becoming insane, we aren't the problem, nor the solution. We are just a means to an end. People see you, learn to know you, love and then mistreat you. When the wheel turns, it will be us coming out stronger because of selflessness. Being selfish only serves ones demise...

You are not alone in this, I am the same. But instead of feeling busted and beaten again by the evilness of life, smile and take it in stride one day at a time. It sucks, but we are human and few if any are better at being this solid, this true, this caring, this loving, this dedicated, this loyal and this human than you. 😉

Thanks for posting this... I really needed to hear it today.

Posted by tsar322

Posted by tsar322

Posted by Sweets681
I am a Taurus and I don't know if any other Taurus has this problem. When I love someone I love hard and it's so difficult for me to move on and forget this person. I always have to go through this time if grieving like someone died. I can meet other people and go on dates but it means nothing. I just hate this about myself. Some people can move on with no problem and I just don't understand. Can someone help me understand why it's so hard.

Easy... Get yourself a damn hobby maybe take up song writing? Write songs about this person you miss and WHY you miss em.
Take up painting. Draw this person as you remember it and when you see something wrong about this person in the painting, emphasize on that in your music and maybe you will forget em for once and for all.

Hmph. Sick of ya lovesick puppies everywhere. You kno what? Im very comfortable with my mind. Thoughts clean and unclean, loving and the opposite of that but I'm no lovesick puppy like the rest of my generation cryin over the next person who dont give a damn about me? That is SICKEST of all things. Look to the present, not the past so you can make the future brighter!!!

click to expand

Thanks for sharing. _??

Posted by Damnata
Earth signs invest in people.

We aren't losing just this random person..we are losing our investment as well. And some of us end up questioning our sanity for the choices we made.

This^^^^^

It's
Caution
Analyze
Assess
Caution
Analyze
Assess
Decision
Committment
150% of my heart, committment and soul
Time
Patience
Trials and Tribulations
I realized I made a mistake.
How?
I dotted all the 'I's and crossed all the 'T's.
Committed to the wrong person
Holding on
What was I thinking?
Stubborn
Fixed
Protecting years invested.

I made this mistake in the past. Learned from it, and will never do it again.

For Earth sign people..the moment someone shows you their true colors GET THE FUCK OUT.

Don't think of the years you invested.

Posted by TaurusBull1977

Posted by Damnata
Earth signs invest in people.

We aren't losing just this random person..we are losing our investment as well. And some of us end up questioning our sanity for the choices we made.

This^^^^^

It's
Caution
Analyze
Assess
Caution
Analyze
Assess
Decision
Committment
150% of my heart, committment and soul
Time
Patience
Trials and Tribulations
I realized I made a mistake.
How?
I dotted all the 'I's and crossed all the 'T's.
Committed to the wrong person
Holding on
What was I thinking?
Stubborn
Fixed
Protecting years invested.

I made this mistake in the past. Learned from it, and will never do it again.

click to expand

Exactly. Though..I must add : Heart is a muscle. We, Taurus people, use it often. Everytime we use it, it grows bigger. Hence, the chances of getting hurt grow exponentially. Yes. We do learn from past mistakes, but we do end up making new ones. All because of what was mentioned before: We know we are strong and can come back from anything, and that makes us love unconditionally. Everytime we come back loving more...giving more and we run the risk of getting hurt more. Does that stop us? Heck no!

Posted by TaurusBull1977

Posted by Damnata
Earth signs invest in people.



We aren't losing just this random person..we are losing our investment as well. And some of us end up questioning our sanity for the choices we made.

This^^^^^

It's
Caution
Analyze
Assess
Caution
Analyze
Assess
Decision
Committment
150% of my heart, committment and soul
Time
Patience
Trials and Tribulations
I realized I made a mistake.
How?
I dotted all the 'I's and crossed all the 'T's.
Committed to the wrong person
Holding on
What was I thinking?
Stubborn
Fixed
Protecting years invested.

I made this mistake in the past. Learned from it, and will never do it again.

click to expand

Exactly that and it is a lesson learned.

Posted by Sweets681
I am a Taurus and I don't know if any other Taurus has this problem. When I love someone I love hard and it's so difficult for me to move on and forget this person. I always have to go through this time if grieving like someone died. I can meet other people and go on dates but it means nothing. I just hate this about myself. Some people can move on with no problem and I just don't understand. Can someone help me understand why it's so hard.

I'm the same way. I love hard and deep. I invest myself completely and let them into my circle. Start building a life together. That's a big deal for me. It's hard to go back to a time before they were a part of my life and it feels like a failure to start over.


My ex's will not know that I still think of them or care after a break up at least not until I've moved on completely. I'm to stubborn and proud for that. When I tell them I'm done. I cut all contact. It's cold turkey. I'm gone. I've already made up my mind. They have lost me. But I do continue to think of them and hurt for months afterwards and slowly start to heal and rebuild myself. I can't date or jump to another relationship right away because I feel like I'm cheating.

Sweets681,

Love is Love... That person somehow moved your soul and rock your world.

Posted by Damnata
For Earth sign people..the moment someone shows you their true colors GET THE FUCK OUT.

Don't think of the years you invested.

Man if only I could just LEARN THIS FREAKING LESSON ALREADY! I just keep fighting...even when I know that it won't work if I get what I want. I can't stop fighting for it until I feel there's no hope left.

I swear that's going to be my new M.O. going forward...

You can still keep fighting as long as you get more and more detached of the outcome.

Long term perspective is great..not for relationships but for your mental and emotional health.

If you fight until there's no hope left you will feel depleted of energy & the bitterness will find its way in.

There's always a new day, a new year, a new life just around the corner. Go for it.

I must be an unusual bull then because if I walk away I don't ever look back.

By the time I have walked, I have already gotten to the point of no return. Piss me off enough times and I am done with you.

My outlook is I am not going to waste any more of my time and energy on someone who is not deserving of it.

Could be an age thing too.

Taurus men problems they don't chase women. They expect women to chase them. yes.. Taurus-Taurus pairs

maybe... but Taurus with other signs..It's rare. Specially Scorpio women... They don't chase Taurus

men. We let it go...and then Taurus men's stubborness and pride killed them... just to prove they can

stand without their partners but they are dying inside... there you go. lol

@ M143

I would beg to differ. We do chase. Here is the thing that I think most people don't get about us. Firstly, the reason why it is so hard for us to let go after investing our time and effort is because we have already decided on what we want. I honestly don't think you chose a Taurus... a Taurus chooses you.
Those that do run after a Taurus will probably tell you, you have to warm up pretty damn hard to us before we even start talking to you. I am the type where if I don't see intelligent live upstairs and no sense of direction then I ain't coming closer than a broom sticks length... make that 2... You need focus and a goal, no goal and I won't be there either, no matter how attractive ect... you are.

We do take time, but once we made our minds up, your it. Done. Here is the killer though. If you don't even know what you want out of life and for yourself, you probably won't get a Taurus either. I personally hate getting involved with people that have no sense of direction. I see it as a big problem. If you'r 16 and don't know what you want, great, work it out. If your 26 and your still mucking about, there is no chance in hell I am going to chase you since you don't know where your heading.

lol@ seeing intelligent life upstairs.

Hahaha

Yeah... I am a bit of a stick when it comes to my partner. She needs to be able to think for her self. Nothing more sexy than a beautiful heart, soul and mind. All 3 are a must, then I care much less for the outside because I already love the inside.

Omagalll,

Well, I don't have that ''inside'' thing. I am tough. I cried only behind closed door.

I don't take half way measures,though.

I didn't chase Taurus. Taurus men can't stand the way I am. but that only happens... when I am

tired of your lies... I say Goodbye and a No turning back approach.

Yeah I hate this trait in myself the most. When my head says it's very obvious that moving on would be the best thing to do for both parties, my heart says ABSOLUTELY NOT THERE MUST BE A WAY TO FIX THIS and so on... And of course there isn't a way anymore and that totally breaks me. And yes, I do the "grieving time" too. It also makes me sad to think about things such "what kind of life we COULD have had together, if only..." But hanging on with past like that is poisonous, I think :/

But the best thing to do in these situations would be trusting that the Sun will shine tomorrow no matter what, and the Earth keeps rolling, and we're not alone (always remember that family and friends are there still, even after the lover is gone, I know how gloomy us Taureans can get...) and there comes a day when it stops hurting. And that love is something that we have in ourselves, we don't need to look for that from other people! We already are a whole person, someone else doesn't make us a whole, they don't bring us happiness, happiness must be found within oneself first. And that it was not a wasted time, it was time while we learned something yet again about ourselves and others. A lived life is never wasted 🙂 Also must remember the butterfly effect of everything, it might be that without that ex, you wouldn't have ever found the next, true love. And the last but not least, if it wasn't meant to be, it really wasn't, and there's someone else for both of you.

Hahah, isn't being a Venusian the most wonderful thing, still? Love is great 😉 Cheer up fellow bulls.

Damn love is like a gamble. I hate losing, and because I feel I give 100. It really should be 50/50 at the most. If he/she is the right one. Sometimes we hold on to bad things. But if we don't let go. It will cause our health to diminish. So find someone or something else worth it. OR focus on you.