Breakups & Virgo Females

I think and analyze a lot before ending a dying relationship and do conscious efforts like empathizing the other person and communicating to resolve issues to come to some mutual resolution. I end it only if I am certain that the other person is not worthy of my love and care. Doubts about the other person are like a hope for me that maybe he/she value this relation too. And till there is some hope I keep the other person under observation like if its trial period and try to see some signs that can make me believe that the relation is not one sided.

And when finally the other person do or say something extremely ruthless but that can make me believe that its time to end then though I got extremely hurt but find a kind of peace too as it ends the uncertainly. For me uncertainty is more painful then breakup.

Do you do abrupt break-ups or you also think a lot before ending ?

and if for you too, a decision based on some uncertainty is disturbing?

What do you think could be the basis reason if Virgo female analyzes a lot before ending a relation?

1) She VALUE RELATIONS and don't want to lose loved ones
2) She is too cautious and afraid of MAKING A MISTAKE by ending a relation just because of some misunderstanding.
3) She is afraid that people will consider her a LOSER if she is failed to make relationship successful.
4) Any other

As for me, the basic reason is not making a mistake as I am perfectionist.

I think 1) fits me the the most. If I analyze a lot before ending a relationship it is because I feel very attached to the person and I want to find a way to fix the problems. It takes a lot for me to let someone in so it takes a lot for me to let them out. I'd probably find it much easier if they would be the one to break up because that would leave me with no choice but to stop trying. I don't really think I'd be afraid it's a mistake. By the time it's done I've looked at it in every way possible (and experienced it in every way possible) to know nothing good will come out of staying together. I also wouldn't be worried what people think about a failed relationship. I get what you mean about uncertainty that's why I had probably let things drag on in the past, so I could be certain in the end it wouldn't have worked.

#1 and I usually analyze, cut, and then analyze some more.

#3 doesn't fit into my playbook. Could care less about looking like a loser especially if the person is not worthy to be in my life in the first place.

It could be a combination of any of the choices listed or all of the above depending on the Virgal in question.

When I'm in a relationship I shouldn't have to feel any doubt. Either he displays his affection and interest in a way that I can feel or that we both can verbalize. I just dislike being confused in a relationship. I give way too many chances to someone when I am with them. I don't mean in the cheating sense. I mean that when I can feel that the vibes are dying I do try and see what the problem is. My number one thing is communication. I am going to ask him, whats up? If he thinks that everything is fine, then that's another problem. That's when I lose a little respect for him. Once all options are exhausted then I cut it off and feel nothing about doing so. I might even be broken hearted but I quickly recover because it wasn't healthy for me anyway.

Posted by VirgoVixxxen
#1 and I usually analyze, cut, and then analyze some more.

#3 doesn't fit into my playbook. Could care less about looking like a loser especially if the person is not worthy to be in my life in the first place.

It could be a combination of any of the choices listed or all of the above depending on the Virgal in question.

Two thumbs up.

Posted by PlanetMercuryGirl

Posted by VirgoVixxxen
#1 and I usually analyze, cut, and then analyze some more.

#3 doesn't fit into my playbook. Could care less about looking like a loser especially if the person is not worthy to be in my life in the first place.

It could be a combination of any of the choices listed or all of the above depending on the Virgal in question.

Two thumbs up.

click to expand

🙂

With #1 ,by the end they aren't valued by me,#2,I check carefully if it is a "misunderstanding" and if I don't like the answers ,out,#3 outsiders don't know all the details of the relationship.So what.Who are they to judge who's a loser or not? They need to worry about their own basket(s)of hot crap.

I go with #4.I have a deal breaker list and make it known to my guy.(ya know,when you're having those causal,get to know each other times).It's considered your first warning,if we have talked and nothing changes.If a guy specifically goes out of his way to do something on the list and feigns innocence,then I still consider it intentional.I broke up with someone on Christmas night,because he tried to linger on,(didn't open or keep gifts ).Years later,he called me,after he got it together.I was civil,we talked,refused to meet with him,(I was happily spoken for) and wished him the best.I'm not bragging or curious enough to revisit anything,it's just an example of the past that was better off in the past.

Sometimes long deep analysing the decision to go,is just an emotional self-stall tactic.How long can someone play at this as an exercise without already have giving breaking up some serious thought.It depends on the particular relationship whether the dump and dash is right or the slow,"it me not you" works.With me,if you're up on deck,you rarely stay past the expiration date.

When it's done,it's done.It's done for a legimate reason.The newly shaped pieces of the old relationship never feel/fit right.The mantra of "this time we won't",doesn't always work.I don't look back.I haven't regretted my decisions.People don't change unless they are ready to. I don't play "the what if" game.It's a waste of time and energy....It doesn't allow a person to move on to a potentially awesome mate.A person needs to bravely let go of the past,how can one embrace the future?How can one learn about themselves if they fall back to the unfullfilling known pattern,vs being with a new someone who is a great human being and is tuned in?If a person wants to be in the relationship,they will be present,ready put in thought time and care.