Confusing Virgo guy. Please help, need insight!

A few months ago I met this Virgo guy at the mall I used to work at. I would go into his store on my lunch break to try on shoes 🙂 hehe. I would chat him up a few times hoping he's eventually get the hint and make a move but he never did so I just gave up (I also moved an hour away so that's another reason why). I let a few months pass by and I found him on facebook through a mutual friend so I added him. He messaged me asking me who I was and I told him. We started talking on there for a few days until he finally gave me his number. After that we upgraded our conversations to texting. A few weeks of texting and he still didn't make a move. He seemed kinda shy or maybe perhaps just not interested so I just decided to make the first move.. I had nothing to lose. So I asked him to hang out and he accepted. So the next day we went to dinner and it was nice he even opened the car door for me like a gentleman. He was the one that texted first after dinner and said he had fun but that was pretty much it. After that I was the one that would text first and initiate conversation. I really wanted to get to know him better because I found him interesting and I would try to get together on the weekends but ever since the school semester started he's been pretty busy. So a month after our last "dinner date" I decided to randomly and spontaneously be bold and I texted him "I think you're a total cutie" just in case he didn't get the hint that I was actually interested. He texted back "why thank you, I can definitely say the same about you" and ever since then he's been texting me almost every day, all throughout the day. He would even text little cute things like "lets have lunch together" even though we weren't physically with each other. This has been going on for a couple weeks now. Sometimes he'd even want to skype but I was busy. Last weekend I was in town so invited him to my friends party and to my surprise he actually came over. We were sitting on her couch throughout the whole party and he was definitely flirting with me and tickling me and he even leaned in for a kiss so I kissed him back. It was perfect and so nice. But now, lately he's been acting different. He still tries to text everyday but not as often and when he does its quite short and all he says is how he's dealing with a lot of stuff and he just wants the day to be over and that how this one friend "especially" pissed him off. I have a feeling that it has to do with a girl. I know he doesn't have

cont. from my previous post.. ^

I know he doesn't have a girlfriend because I asked him and he said that he's too "lazy" for a gf right now and that he hasn't had one since high school (we're both 20) so I just don't know what to think and I'm so confused. I really like him but I kind of want to give up on this guy. What do you all think? Virgos are so hard :/

Posted by Loveorlust
I don't know what to tell you except Virgos are very finicky and very hard workers and very hard to get to know! From my experience they can be so arrogant one minute and if the slightest thing doesn't go the way THEY plan they just turn inward! If you really like him and can wait around and then still be unsure if they like you- lol- then Virgo man is for you!

ugh indeed. They are very inward creatures haha. I used to have a virgo bf and for the most part he was pretty straight forward but I did see that he whenever a personal problem arose he kinda kept to himself. I just hope everything goes well with this guy :l

It's tough, I know. But, as a female Virgo, I know how frustrating it is to get other people to understand that what I am dealing with can only be dealt with by giving it my complete attention. It is not meant to ignore others; that doesn't even enter my mind. It sounds to me as though he is absorbed in something else and I would give him all the space he needs until he works it through. It sounds very cold and people who have not fully understood a Virgo ever truly understand, but I would be surprised if it was anything personal. Virgos are too direct for that, as a general rule.

My entire life I've been referred to as 'a loner', 'extremely private', to even downright cold and indifferent. Nothing could be further from the truth. Yes, I prefer to be alone when I have a project or something needs my undivided attention, but other than that, I am very interested in other people and know how to have a good time in a group of people (when I'm not playing analyst inside), but I truly believe Virgos are one of the most misunderstood signs in the group.

Forgive me for getting off track and now back to yours. There are only two options available to you. Give him time and if you don't hear from him, let him go. If you do hear from him, tell him how confusing this is to you. A true Virgo will listen. Otherwise, he's just a jerk and I wouldn't waste one more second on him.

Posted by BeachMama
It's tough, I know. But, as a female Virgo, I know how frustrating it is to get other people to understand that what I am dealing with can only be dealt with by giving it my complete attention. It is not meant to ignore others; that doesn't even enter my mind. It sounds to me as though he is absorbed in something else and I would give him all the space he needs until he works it through. It sounds very cold and people who have not fully understood a Virgo ever truly understand, but I would be surprised if it was anything personal. Virgos are too direct for that, as a general rule.

My entire life I've been referred to as 'a loner', 'extremely private', to even downright cold and indifferent. Nothing could be further from the truth. Yes, I prefer to be alone when I have a project or something needs my undivided attention, but other than that, I am very interested in other people and know how to have a good time in a group of people (when I'm not playing analyst inside), but I truly believe Virgos are one of the most misunderstood signs in the group.

Forgive me for getting off track and now back to yours. There are only two options available to you. Give him time and if you don't hear from him, let him go. If you do hear from him, tell him how confusing this is to you. A true Virgo will listen. Otherwise, he's just a jerk and I wouldn't waste one more second on him.

I know what you mean and it's completely understandable. He did have a life before I came along but I just have this strong feeling that whatever he's trying to deal with has to do with another girl and its bugging the crap out of me. I don't want to ask him about it because we only actually hung out like twice and we've only been "talking" for like almost two months so he's still new to me. I just don't want to scare him off and I'm trying to give him his space.

As a mother, I will say with absolute authority, Trust Your Instincts. If you think it has to do with a past girlfriend, it probably does, but he may just be working through it. Virgos can be very tenacious if they think they've found 'the one' because we tend to be so picky. When we think we've found it, we'll fight like tigers to keep it. I'm not saying that's what's going on, but if it is, as hard as it is, you've got to let him have the time to figure it out. The one piece of good news here is that he hasn't come out and said anything to you about not contacting him again. I, as a Virgo, would absolutely be upfront about that; we tend to be very exacting and hate to waste our time or other people's.

I'll give you one trick that drives almost all Virgos I know crazy and that's silence. Go on. Live your life and don't contact him for at least a week. He's a man, too, and they love a mystery and the chase. Add in the natural Virgo Columbo Complex and you could be hearing from him more than you'd like!

All the best.

Posted by BeachMama
As a mother, I will say with absolute authority, Trust Your Instincts. If you think it has to do with a past girlfriend, it probably does, but he may just be working through it. Virgos can be very tenacious if they think they've found 'the one' because we tend to be so picky. When we think we've found it, we'll fight like tigers to keep it. I'm not saying that's what's going on, but if it is, as hard as it is, you've got to let him have the time to figure it out. The one piece of good news here is that he hasn't come out and said anything to you about not contacting him again. I, as a Virgo, would absolutely be upfront about that; we tend to be very exacting and hate to waste our time or other people's.

I'll give you one trick that drives almost all Virgos I know crazy and that's silence. Go on. Live your life and don't contact him for at least a week. He's a man, too, and they love a mystery and the chase. Add in the natural Virgo Columbo Complex and you could be hearing from him more than you'd like!

All the best.

omg that is soo dead on! He even told me himself that he hasn't had a gf in a while because he's too lazy and too picky and he's picky because he can afford to be. I took that for complete arrogance though. He also said that girls just give him their numbers like nothing but he's usually too lazy to do anything about it. So this guy is definitely used to a lot of female attention but not from me anymore haha thanks for the advice!

'Glad to be of help. Hang in there, kid and resist the phone. Give it to a friend if you have to if the urge to contact is too great. Been there. Be the Queen of your own world.

He knows you are very interested. You made all the moves so far. That shows interest. So there is nothing more you need to do short of forcing him or threatening him!

He said he is lazy because he doesn't have to do anything to win a girl, he just has to show up and after some time, get bored and slack off. He is lazy because he never has to do anything to get female company. If he was left alone for a long time and the urge to bond with a woman struck him, he will finally be motivated to do something about it and make some moves.

The whole time you have known him, you closed the distance between the two of you, not him. So it is you who is interested. He isn't.

A guy who accepts a woman's advances doesn't mean he is as interested as she is. If he is not initiating at all, it just means he is bored, doesn't have anything better to do, yet isn't totally turned off, and doesn't want to hurt your feelings by saying no.

I know people might get sick of me saying this on dxpnet. But is this the way you want to be treated? Someone who does not cherish you? Who isn't excited about you? Who can put it off to see you? Important to not get caught up on how we feel about someone, but to watch their actions and check it against what we want. And if you don't know what you want in terms of treatment, make a list.

A Virgo is VERY VERY picky when it comes to settling for someone. We are most likely out of all the signs to end up single. It isn't because we don't want romance and love, It is because we are highly discriminating and it is our nature, so we fight that constantly and are in a tug of war between that scrutiny and our deep heartfelt desire for romantic love.

It isn't because there is anything wrong with you, or that you are not attractive, just that what speaks to each Virgo's heart and electrifies him or her is very specific. Sometimes we don't even know. So it is nothing you did, and unfortunately, there is nothing you can do to make him like you more. 😢

Good answer VS 🙂 i needed to hear that. I was involved with a Vman up to recently and decided to just give him a rest... when he did the unthinkable and ignored me for my bday a few days ago. So I am doing just that. staying away... 😢

Listen closely, you need to relax. Slow down. You will never know all of any guys secrets. With that said, us Virgos like to keep everything inside. You'd be lucky to learn our favorite food after two years. It's only been two months and you're not actually crossed that couples line yet. Just relax & remember who you are. Just stop thinking so much about him. He's not going anywhere. Know you're own value and he will value you also. I notice you never stated your Zodiac Sign. Maybe we all could help more with that little bit of info...

Posted by LostintheSauce
Listen closely, you need to relax. Slow down. You will never know all of any guys secrets. With that said, us Virgos like to keep everything inside. You'd be lucky to learn our favorite food after two years. It's only been two months and you're not actually crossed that couples line yet. Just relax & remember who you are. Just stop thinking so much about him. He's not going anywhere. Know you're own value and he will value you also. I notice you never stated your Zodiac Sign. Maybe we all could help more with that little bit of info...

YES.

Girls, men are SIMPLE. If they like you, they chase. PERIOD.

Posted by LostintheSauce
Listen closely, you need to relax. Slow down. You will never know all of any guys secrets. With that said, us Virgos like to keep everything inside. You'd be lucky to learn our favorite food after two years. It's only been two months and you're not actually crossed that couples line yet. Just relax & remember who you are. Just stop thinking so much about him. He's not going anywhere. Know you're own value and he will value you also. I notice you never stated your Zodiac Sign. Maybe we all could help more with that little bit of info...

yes, I know you're absolutely right. I'm a Taurus which will explain everything haha we're so overly dramatic and emotional. Anyways, here's a little update so two nights ago he was texting me right as I was about to go to sleep so I told him but then he texted back saying "noo stay up. Tell me more about yourself." so he was asking me questions and I answered and then I asked him some questions and he gave me quite a bit of info about himself sooo.. with that being said. I personally think he is interested because what guy would ask questions if they didnt care and he's the only that's always texts me first now. He tries to at least once a day. But... It still seems as of he hasn't solved his little "dilemma" with his "friend". Whatever it is that's bugging him is sure bugging me now :/

Taurus girl, why is he texting you? Maybe because he couldn't get with the girl he REALLY wants? I don't mean to sound cruel but that is pretty realistic to say i think. You're not alone, I myself am that way when I like a guy. I am desperately looking for clues and every hint that can verify he wants me. But just because he texts you doesn't mean anything. Remember, he could be bored. People text when they are bored instead of actually dating you.

He could be texting other girls at the same time and even seeing them. Meanwhile you could be spending time with a guy who wants you and no one else. You can't change a guy's mind when it comes to chemistry or make him feel ready if he isn't. He either wants you as you are, or doesn't. No gray areas.

Gray areas are just excuses we invent for ourselves to avoid facing the notion it isn't going to work.