Get your attention?

When a virgo guy is interested in you, what is his way of getting your attention? Does he tend to act moody when things arent going the way he wants them to with you? I'm asking this question because things were cool with me and my virgo co worker, we were having a normal work day when all of a sudden, he got really pissed off and snapped at me. I took offense and decided to give him a taste of his own medicine and gave him the cold shoulder. He seemed kind of upset and started asking me workplace related questions that I know he knew the answer to. I replied with monosylables and he eventually gave up. A couple of hours later a female employee came over who I didn't know and he began flirting with her in front of me. I continued to ignore him and her until she left. He then began trying to get my attention again, asking more questions and even doing some of my work for me. The next day he was going out of his way to be friendy to me, acting like nothing happened and seemed kind of confused that I wasn't being my normal friendly self. That day he kind of alternated between trying to be friendly with me and losing his temper when he thought I wouldn't see. He seemed really upset and unsure of himself, though he knew why I wasn't going out of my way to be around him or talk to him. We are both virgo's and I guess that I was giving him the infamous "cold shoulder" that I have heard virgos are so good at. I honestly didn't expect the reaction that I got from him. He didn't come up to me and ask what was bothering me, but he seemed upset that I wasn't being friendly to him. This is odd because whenever he has a problem with someone at work, his usual reaction is that he doesn't care. Our other coworkers keep telling me that there is an obvious atttraction between us but I am really shy and could NEVER approach him that way. I just want some insight as to how to read him and get an idea of where we stand.

I work with developmentally disabled people, so when I say that he did some of my work for me, what I meant was that he got two of my clients showered and put in bed. It isn't exactly easy to do so I was appreciative but he usually will assist one extra person to help us all out.

Fragile, please tell me the clients didn't witness him losing his temper. Totally not good for work morale, especially when you are working with the developmentally disabled. I know the field pretty well and I commend you as it takes a lot of patience and a good temperment. Other than that, I ain't got nothing on you Virgos. You kids are a delightfully weird bunch when it comes to the romance department, initially. I say that with love. 🙂

Oh most definetly not. He didn't lose his temper in a big way. He just got kinda ticked off and I could see it on his face. We are always very conscious of having an upbeat, positive attitude in our agency because we realize how our attitudes effect the clients. If anything, this virgo man is even more conscious of his behavior around the residents because he has been working in various agencies for a while and plans on working with the developmentally disabled as a career.

Dy- Its been four months already and he hasn't made ANY move. Not asked for my number, nothing... I have invited him to a get together this weekend but I still don't know if he is going to come. And if he does, what do I do? I have no idea how to approach this and I am pretty sure that he has no intention of making a move, especially because he is my supervisor.

I have been told that I looked "unapproachable", but as soon as someone began talking with me, that I was very easy to talk to. One Sag woman told me it is the way I carry myself, but she did not elaborate past that point.

I know I begin hanging around a woman and I just try to talk I suppose. If she responds to that, then day by day, week by week,when I am sure I like her eventually i'll let her know. But look for the very small things, is he trying to do little things for you? Spends more time around you than co-workers, cracks jokes?

Actually I have tested this. We have a couch with an armchair at each end. A couple of times we have finished early and I will purposely sit at an armchair, leaving the couch and other armchair unoccupied. I've noticed that most of the time he ends up sitting at the end of the couch next to me. We will literally be sitting right next to each other. Sometimes he will do some of my work for me. If I am upset or in a bad mood, he will usually try to cheer me up. I'm closer to him than the other co-workers at our job but I think it mainly has to do with the fact that I was nicest to him when he first started working with us. Also, whenever he is in charge he usually has us working together. I'm still unsure though. Maybe he is just a really nice guy and I am misreading all of this because I like him and he doesn't feel the same way?

Since you are a Virgo, you should fully realize that this man is probably just as critical about himself, as he is with others. A continuous self-examination, is prominate in all Virgo's right?

This may tick you off, but, it appears from your post that you have caused some of this anguish. Listen to what you said . . . everything was fine, until one day, he snapped, then you played with his emotions and, quote, "He seemed kind of upset". I guess so . . he had what all us humans have and that was a moment of frustration that should have been overlooked.

You said, exact words, "we were having a normal work day when all of a sudden, he got really pissed off and snapped at me. I took offense and decided to give him a taste of his own medicine and gave him the cold shoulder"

You know, people get upset . . and most times, it's just a passing emotion, which we will regret later and feel terrible about it. Knowing that he's a wonderful person, which you do realize by the way you talk about him, the considerate thing to do, would have been to just let him vent. The job sounds stressful, and you said yourself, that everybody has to be consciousious of behaviour in front of the patients. Everybody needs to let off steam and he probably didn't mean to direct towards you because you said, "The next day he was going out of his way to be friendy to me".

Want to know what to do? Apologize for being being vindictive. It sounds like he's doing everything he can to mend the bridge, and your standing there wanting more from him.

When you love someone, or care about them deeply . . you have to understand when they get upset, just as he has comprehended that you were upset and he tries to make amends.

Have you tried to make amends? Or, are you standing your ground, claiming he was at fault and must continue to appease you until your satisified?

What more do you want?

Tell him your sorry, for you wronged him too by turning a cold shoulder.

Why should she aplogize? He's the one who snapped, I didnt here her say anything about him apologizing...although I think you should let him back in since you want him sooo badly...then again you asked him out so GOOD LUCK.

In my experience you can wait 'till you grow nails as long as Howard Hughes and still not get an apology from a Virgo. They will give you a small offering or do something subtle to get your attention. Not all Vs are like V62 who offered to fly his lady love half way around the Continent.

I dont think thats fair...you can crack a joke and totally ignore the fact you just hurt someones feelings. No she shouldn't be so quick to take his friendship back, he needed to be taught that lesson that she wont take that BS, and respect her in the future.

If he had just snapped at me once that day I would have been okay with it. People are entitled to have their bad moments. However, he snapped at me a couple times that day, including once in front of the unfamiliar female co-worker. His change of mood was very sudden and unexpected. That is what really pissed me off. I treated him like I would any co-worker who was in a foul mood, I for the most part avoided him. He was aware of his actions and instead of apologizing he made it up to me in other ways and I did eventually forgive him. If he had apologized then and there there things wouldnt have continued. I really do like him but I am definetly not going to let someone act out like that and pretend that everything is ok.

"he snapped at me a couple times that day, including once in front of the unfamiliar female co-worker. His change of mood was very sudden and unexpected. That is what really pissed me off"

You didn't say that, Fragileheart . . . lol

From your original post, it appeared as though he just had a bad moment and you freaked out about it . . . lol

Still, though, being vindictive and doing something out of spite is not a good quality, especially if you're trying to begin a new relationship with someone and want to make good impressions.

If you didn't have feelings for him, none of this would bother you and you probably wouldn't have been cold to him if he snapped . . then, you would have seen it as just being stressed-out. Only because you care for him, did you have that reaction. So, in Lieu of that, what you did was vindictive.

I hear what your saying, Lady, "he needed to be taught that lesson that she wont take that BS, and respect her in the future", however, the typical Virgo doesn't respond with remorse or guilt of actions to this kind of manipulation. Fragileheart realizes this, though she's not saying, because that was the motive for her actions as well. You can't teach a Virgo lessons by playing with their emotions . . . lol, that's funny, Lady.

"I honestly didn't expect the reaction that I got from him. He didn't come up to me and ask what was bothering me, but he seemed upset that I wasn't being friendly to him."

You're surprised? Really? Fragileheart, he's a VIRGO . . what were you expecting? The reaction of an emotional water sign . . . lol

"I am definetly not going to let someone act out like that and pretend that everything is ok." Then, you might as well start looking now, for a relationship with somebody who will take all blame and make YOU think everything is ok, so you won't have to comprimise. I'm not saying that you were at fault for everything . . what I am saying is that you want to reserve the right to be a Virgo, but, he has to bend over to your expectations . . like he's not a Virgo. He's not gonna come crawling like some little puppy dog, ya know . . lol

A Pisces will do that, ordinarily. Try one of those out.

You're silly, Fragileheart . . are you REALLY expecting him to carry himself like that? They refuse . . REFUSE . . to be anybody's whipping post.

Don't you know that? lol

Fragileheart,

I had a Virgo go wiggy on me for reasons unknown. When I asked him to explain he got one of his friends to speak to me because he was being a total bitch-ass bitch about the whole thing. And, he never did apologize and neither did I for calling him as "asshole" which he was. Don't worry, they know when they've done something wrong. They get like puppies who want your attention by sticking their nose under your hand so you can pet them.

This sounds like a stress related incident, not something he did out of trying to hurt your feelings, "we were having a normal work day when all of a sudden, he got really pissed off and snapped at me. I took offense . ."

If I got offended everytime my man got irritated and grumbled loudly about something, I'd be spending my entire life with hurt little feelings. It appears as though you were just jealous because some "other woman" has an attraction to him.

After re-reading the post several times, it appears that he seems pretty normal and has treated you as he should be . . you just got your panties in a wad because this other woman might try and move in on what you want to be your territory.

I'm just saying this so you comprehend that a lot of this is your own insecurity. Just because there is another woman in the office, is no reason for this kind of reaction. He just had a bad moment and needed to vent . . why is that so hard to understand? Needing to release tension isn't being disrespectful. In my opinion, not allowing another person to release the tension is what is disrespectful because it shows that there isn't any empathy or compassion.

I'd be willing to wager, Fragileheart, that there have been plenty of times in your life where you were frustrated and vented on somebody who was a by-stander. That's all this sounds like it was . . but, YOU took offense, when he probably didn't mean it. That's pretty unfair and not very compassionate.

If it were just a bad moment, I wouldn't have even taken note. He's had a couple of times where he has been upset or snappy and I ignore it cause I know that within 5 or so minutes he will be back to being the same cool person I know. That day however, he was extremely short with me. He was acting ok with all the other co-workers, but I for some reason was getting rude remarks. It only happened a couple of times because I tried to avoid him when I realized that his attitude wasn't going to go away easily, but it did upset me. In dealing with the situation with him, I would have prefered if he would have aknowleged his behavior towards me and apologized. He didn't so I dealt with it as best I could. Yes, I could have asked to talk to him privately and told him I didn't appreciate the way he was behaving towards me but I know how that conversation would have gone and I didn't want to go that route. In dealing with him I wasn't rude, I wasn't disrespectful, and I wasn't unprofessional. I simply treated him as I would any of our other co-workers. The thing that bothered him was that I wasn't treating him like a friend. I wasn't going out of my way to be mean or disrespectful towards him, I simply wasn't encouraging our normal friendly teasing or joking around.
As for the unfamiliar female co-worker, at first I was annoyed when I saw her flirting with him, but I kind of had this nagging feeling that I had seen her before. It wasn't more than 5 minutes before I realized where I remembered her from. She had been at our company BBQ a few months earlier and had been flirting with him then too. She invited him over to her house to go skinny dipping back then. He at the time had confided to me that he was pretty disgusted with her because he knew that she had a kid and a husband who was stationed overseas. Also, he is not the kind of guy to do that sort of thing so I really wasn't worried about it.

"He at the time had confided to me that he was pretty disgusted with her because he knew that she had a kid and a husband who was stationed overseas"

That's terrible . . no wonder he was disgusted. Apparantly, her husband must still be gone, since she's continueing in flirting with him. Some people have no morals, or scruples.

Fragileheart, sounds like he's a pretty solid person, who believes in standing up for his principals. I wouldn't put too much worry into his behaviour . . lol, that was funny to even say that. A Virgo not worry !!!!! lol

He's probably just being nervous because he likes you. It sounds kind of like the old story about the boy who likes the girl . . so, he teases her, and pokes at her and dips her hair in the ink blotter.

I'm sure it will all work out, and if it doesn't, at least you'll know that he has some integrity. If he didn't, he would have bagged the whore.

This whole sitting back and waiting to see if he is gonna make a move is killing me. A few nights ago I did the seating thing again. He was sitting in the armchair on the left of the couch, so I took care to sit on the far right side of the couch. What do you know, he gets up to put something away, grabs a magazine and sits down in the armchair directly to the left of me. All the other seats were empty so he could have just sat down at the chair he was in before, but he walked across to where I was sitting and sat next to me. Also, I invited him to the get together I had planned and for a while it seemed like he was gonna come, but the day before it I asked him if he was in or out and he hesitated for a moment and then said he wasn't gonna come. What the hell? If he liked me, wouldn't he think of this as a good oportunity to spend time with me outside of work? I hate this guessing game. I can't do anything because he is technically my boss and it would make things uncomfortable if I was just reading to deep into things.