How to Get Virgoman to Chase

Hi,

Yesterday I posted how I am initiating all of the phone calls and get-togethers with my Virgo.

Is there a way I could turn the tables a little on this as I really would like to know that HE wants to get-together as much as I do, you know?

I've tried not calling, thinking he will surely call or show up, but no...and I only have gotten as far as 4 days, and I can't help it, I am on the phone calling him up.

Way back in the beginning, he was the initiater. Now I am. I don't mind it so much. He doesn't mind it. But, you know? ......maybe I should try for 5 days this week? LOL

He visited last evening and we enjoyed a real good time. When parting, there was no future date made or "let's get together again tomorrow, next week, next month..." Zilcho!

"Once I make up my mind, I envelop. I make myself indispensible to you. I integrate my life with yours. You'll wonder how you ever got by without me..."

Ha!!! Funny you should say that, because I've heard that's exactly the way for a person to make a Virgo go crazy for them.

That was the most Virgo thing I have seen someone post in a while. 😛

"Life's too short to pine away over one guy who may not be The One for you...!"

BRAVOOOOOOOOOOOOO

"The only 'chaser' VirGuy I know is the adulterous charmer"

Dy, can you further describe this adulterous charmer type, that I may be discerning in my own analysis? You know...traits, things to look for...?

I've been invited by a few friends to attend an event early this evening, and I'm going out soon. I'll keep your words in mind (and Everyone's).

I just can't tell. He was "afraid," he said, a couple of weeks ago. I don't know the complete story. Said he was "emotionally tired" after our re-connection and after my disclosure of my feelings and seeing eachother a lot while he was working 2 jobs. We don't see eachother as frequently now. He's tied up with work, and going through job changes. He believes he will have more time to spend with me then. Could be a wait and see situation?

I'll definitely let the time pass to see if he will initiate something this time.

Thanks, Dy and All,

ltvm

start dating someone else?!

But virgo plays hard to get all the time. it's no fair!

boo. I don't like your bluntness. Damn, I don't wanna hear the truth! I come on here to be humoured. Gets me through the day....

Actually Brandon i AdOoOre your frankness.. I pose this question.. Should no answer at all be regarded as "NO" for an answer.. I mean.. like u said.. some have a problem with frankness.. I didnt reallie think tha one i was dealin with was one of those.. but I can assume that wen after ive told him how i deeply feel about him.. n he tells me Im still crazy.. that thats a HELL No.. lol.. i dont know wat happened.. At this point.. I woodnt Fcuk with him again if i had the opportunity.. he lost too much of my respect..like i said i prefer brute frankness over dodgin n lies.. dont know y he just up n decided to flip the script on me.. guess it just could never be the same.. despite how much my broken heart wishes it so..

Well, it's very frustrating when no answer isn't considered to be an answer either. I find it very rude to be ignored. Like if I send a text message with a question, I find it to be respectable to get an answer. I get nothing, which is infuriating. I don't understand that type of behavior at all. It's like he's annoyed at something and giving me the silent treatment for some reason. His birthday is on Friday and I really don't know whether to ignore it or acknowledge it. Part of me wants to acknowledge and the other part says ignore it. Then I keep reading that Virgos come back eventually. I even read tonight that Dy advised Lovethatvirgoman to not take contact with her Virgo guy so he'd have to eventually take contact with her. Boy, I wonder how long it takes a Virgo guy to finally realize when he should have some respect for a gal. That push and pull thing can be really tiring. I haven't spoken to the Virgo guy in my case since the ending of July. I've attempted to contact him but he ignores me which is very rude. He doesn't answer text messages either. I've never had a guy act like this before so I have to believe this Virgo guy is special. At least I hope so. If I ever meet another Virgo, I hope I don't have so much trouble because it's really odd behavior.

I can definitely say, he is not making himself indispensable to me.

In fact, after going out with my friends tonight, I ventured to his workplace (public retail place) and silly me invited him over after work (after I said I wouldn't even call him, right?), and he said "ok" and I woke up on the sofa at 1:30 a.m. lights on, door wide open, and no Virgoman in sight. Hellow? I figure (because this is maybe the 4th time this has happened), that I am suppose to be learning...practicing...testing how not to get emotionally upset because he is exhausted after a trillion hours of working and how he can't be expected to be at my beck and call kind-of-thing every time I want his company. I know I said I wouldn't contact him. But, I did. Now I'm getting a little pieved at this behavior of his and I think it will make it Easier for me to hold off contacting him now. We're suppose to have a date on his birthday in a couple of weeks IF he gets the day off. His boss is on vacation until the end of this week and that's when he is suppose to let me know if he has been granted the day off...and I do believe that I will not call or make any other contact with Virgo. He gets a little test now, too. He knows I am waiting to know and I WILL wait. And I will not contact him, either at the end of the week or ever again if he does not contact me about this, especially after tonight's no-call-no-show. I hope I'm not being too Taurean, but I really am becoming a little emotionally worn from all of this. If I'm being tested on this, I may be willing to fail in order to preserve my sanity. I think the test is whether or not I get emotional over this incident of his not calling or showing up. It isn't about whether I accept this behavior of his or not. So I don't accept it. This is the 4th time this has happened, and I believe I've paid my dues plenty if I am to realize anything here...I'm realizing that I'm allowing him to abuse me now.

I thought I may pass Virgo's battery of tests, but I may just have to move quietly on. I'm really a little emotionally tired, myself, now that I think of it. It was great that I realized his love and affection for the past 8-9 years, however late I am. Maybe I can put it all to better use elsewhere.

All of the feedback on this board is awesome. I love everyone's candor.

mystiCal.. not to rain on your parade.. but ill tell u.. what you goin thru.. i just left alone.. it has nothing to do with my spontaneous... intense.. imagainative.. sagg personality... its just Me.. n i dont think the pull push thing is an effective expression of how much love u hold for a person.. just like brandon said.. if a virg is playin hard to get with u.. its probably cause he dont want u n just is not goin to say it.. or then theres the chance u could have one of the overly emotionally insecure ones n its all just a play on words and actions.. either way.. its your decision.. how much do u value yourself n your efforts to get with someone who wont even give u the common courtesy of a simple response— i dont know about u.. but that shit pissed me WWAAAyy off.. at first it was a bit endearing.. only because we began where he was in pursuit of me.. so as time went on i felt like okay.. maybe he just wants to be pursued.. but Fcuk that.. he wanted a ride.. n i gave him one.. unknowingly.. but i did nonetheless.. whatever happened.. its in the past now.. hopefully it wont take a brutal realization for u to understand what u have to do..

Much Love ~~ Sam

Hopelessdreamr,

Thank you very much for your bluntness. No, you didn't rain on my parade either. The writing is on the wall. Unfortunately, it's taken me quite a while to accept it though as I never thought he'd give me the silent treatment. If I knew what was wrong, he and I could work through it but it's very difficult when I don't even know what the issue is. He told me the last time we spoke, which was in late July that there were many things sick about him. When he said that it was like from left field and I really didn't know what to say. Therefore I told him he could talk to me about anything and he said he knew that. I asked him would I be hearing from him again and he told me: "Maybe when he's better". Of course, I didn't really think he was thinking clearly at all as he was drunk when he told me this. Therefore I've let him be but at times I've either attempted to take contact with him via text or call but mostly text. He doesn't respond to either which I find very rude. What I don't understand is why he'd push me away as I've only been supportive of him. My only guess is I was too good to him that he couldn't handle it. I've never had trouble with guys before in my entire life so I'm baffled he's being the way he's being. It doesn't make sense to me. I feel he could at least give the common courtesy to respond. At least let me know something but he doesn't do a thing. It's confusing behavior. I guess it's his way of playing mind games with me. It's like I'm left wondering why he's being the way he's being. Sure, I've been very sad regarding his behavior. I've had to go as far as deep soul searching within myself to finally realize it's not I that has the problem, but him. For a while I would blame myself for his behavior and I didn't even do anything. I'd be sad for days on end thinking about him. He was constantly on my mind. I could never break free from not thinking of him until recently. Finally, the peace I needed to let go of him came to me and the sadness I had is now turned to relief. I truly believe I'm being saved from more heartache. I can't take anymore of his silent treatment. However, I have more one day to get through which will be a bit hard. The day is on Friday which is his birthday. This day will be a sad day for me because I can't talk to him or anything. After Friday, I will be completely free but it's going to be hard. Thank God I'll be busy all day but I probably will be thinking of him and thinking what a fool he is.