Ok, my Virguy needs to CHILL...

I'm a gay gemini guy and I've been talking to a Virgo/Libra cusp guy for about 3 months now and we've been getting along great. We've only been talking online and on the phone (we met on a dating site) but we have bonded EXTREMELY well through our similar life experiences and sense of humor.

Anyway, he's dealing with some heartbreak right now and I've been someone he's been able to confide in. Whatever this other guy did to him has put him in a very deep depression. He hasn't talked to this other guy in over a month, but he still feels depressed. He told me that he keeps replaying what happened over and over again in his head, like its a videotape.

How do you Virgos, or even better, Virgo/Libra cusp people deal with heartbreak?

He just wants to be alone a lot of the time and every time I invite him to hang out with me (I keep telling him it would be a casual hangout situation) he declines and says that he'd rather be alone. He also recently told me that he feels it would be unfair to me for me to see him "not at his best." He says he wouldn't be giving me a good first impression. He keeps reassuring me that I mean a lot to him and it's not that he's trying to ignore me. He just feels anti-social in general. He also told me his libido is shot.

I guess I just get over things easier than he can. When I feel depressed, being alone just makes things worse for me. I obviously can't expect him to handle things the same way as me.

I guess I just need to be patient. I think the Gemini in me keeps making me think of things as temporary. Meaning, I feel that if I don't hang out with him in person, he's just going to drop me and forget about me. Then again, he's reassured me that he values me a lot and I've told him that I care about him a lot and that I feel very protective of him.

He sees me as an important person in his life. I would like it to become love or some semblance of love.

If I sound more lovey-dovey than a typical Gemini, I think it's because I'm a Cancer moon, lol.

I also have a gut feeling that we'd have amazing sex together. I really want to have sex with him.

Me:
Sun = Gemini
Moon = Cancer
Mercury = Gemini
Venus = Taurus
Mars = Cancer
Jupiter = Aries
Saturn = Sagittarius
Uranus = Sagittarius
Neptune = Capricorn
Pluto = Scorpio

Any thoughts about this Virgo/Libra cusp guy?

I think he needs time to heal. This one is worth the time and I ain't giving up that easy!!

Dy is a cusp, he should be able to help.

Straight or gay doesn't matter. Everyone has the same kinds of emotions, Dy. I'm younger than you, but I figured most people understood that. I help my straight friends with romantic problems all the time.

Actually, at this moment, I feel more grounded than my Virgo/Libra cusp guy. He sounds pretty unstable right now because of his depression. He just needs to CHILL and not let one person make him feel like shit.

I don't appreciate your dismissive attitude.

My virguy likes to think of himself as more a Libra than a Virgo. Which i found interesting. And Libra-Gemini is a good match.

Dy, maybe you've just met really bad geminis.

It sounds to me like this may just be a temporary thing, but hes too nice to let you think of it like that......

but the possibility still remainds that this guy could be for real. and if he is i would say just be patient with it and keep ur distance... u know, kind of let him bounce back. but that would probably take a really long time, which sucks. so i dunno... your options at this point are to stay where you are at right now, don't make him feel uncomfortable by pressuring him to get over it. or, you could just move on and keep looking for somebody else.. but of course you could stay his friend at the same time. and who knows, maybe eventually he will invite u into his world.

but you gotta understand that until then, you really dont have any serious ties to this guy. you may have feelings for him, but that shouldnt stop you from being open to the other options.

"The only thing you could do is make him smile, send a little light into the darkness of his heart"


I'm VERY good at this fortunately lol. I want him to know that I'm here for him, which I am. This guy is very special, I can tell. He and I share the same sense of humor and that's such a big part of who both of us are. Every time we talk I feel like its a contest to see who can make the other laugh the most.

Posted by Gemiguy
"The only thing you could do is make him smile, send a little light into the darkness of his heart"


I'm VERY good at this fortunately lol. I want him to know that I'm here for him, which I am. This guy is very special, I can tell. He and I share the same sense of humor and that's such a big part of who both of us are. Every time we talk I feel like its a contest to see who can make the other laugh the most.

wow its really funny u say this. Pretty much every relationship i've ever had with gemini (and ive known a lot of geminis in my time) sounds just like this. and i dont rly get y everyone says that these 2 arent a good match because, in my opinion it is a great match. gemini and virgo are like zodiac siblings or cousins, who get along very well. the only bad part about getting into love relationships with geminis for me is it sometimes gets a little creepy cuz it starts feeling like im kissing my brother/sister or something lol

Posted by hikoro
Gemiguy,

Was he the 'dumpee'?

Because this is relevant into how a virgo will deal with heartbreak.

In addition to this, Jupiter is in Pisces this year. Jupiter in Pisces is meant to be a great transit in regards to love and relationships for Virgos, some astrologers wrote that some Virgos would get engaged or even marry. Basically, Virgos are supposed to feel more positive and see love in rose-colored glasses.

So, the fact that this relationship did not work along with this hopeful transit may be causing more hurt than the usual.

You seem to be interested in him but, aren't you worried of becoming his rebound?

wow... that couldnt be further from the truth for this year O_o

^ well for me anyway lol

"You seem to be interested in him but, aren't you worried of becoming his rebound?"

He told me that when we started talking he thought of me as kind of a rebound situation. (he obviously didn't say the word "rebound" but that's essentially what he said). While he was talking to me he was trying work things out with this other guy. The other guy was a Taurus that strung him along and was very ambiguous with him and ended up breaking his heart.

The thing is, he wasn't in an actual relationship with the Taurus, he just idealized him and thought he was falling in love with him. So when he discovered the Taurus didn't feel the same way, he was devastated. He wishes he never met this guy. I've been someone he's been confiding in. I've been cheering him up.

I hope he can start feeling better about himself soon so we can finally hang out. It's bizarre how we've gotten so close just via the phone and talking online.

"the only bad part about getting into love relationships with geminis for me is it sometimes gets a little creepy cuz it starts feeling like im kissing my brother/sister or something lol"

Zen,

When we talk it always comes off as flirty... I've been trying my best to not turn it into a brother situation, lmao. We've been talking very flirtatiously and sexually with each other. This guy is SO HOT, lol. He thinks I'm hot too. And I'm not just talking about his looks, his charming personality and his quick wit makes me melt.

well you do sound very into him lol

any chance of us getting a picture..? 😄

Oh, and also, I like to think of him as one of the very rare people I've encountered that can actually "keep up with me." I am a very quick witted person, and I can turn something mundane into a joke very fast. One thing I look for in a guy is the ability to understand my humor and can keep up with my quick wit. This Virgo/Libra cusp guy is one of those very rare people.

And he makes me laugh a lot, which is actually kind of hard because my sense of humor is so specific. I feel like I've heard everything, so to be able to make me laugh hard is quite an accomplishment. Another way I like to describe talking to him is that it's very "authentic." It never feels like we're being fake with each other. He and I have shared very deep parts of ourselves with each other, which feels great.

Posted by zen
well you do sound very into him lol

any chance of us getting a picture..? 😄

I have naughty pics!! but he would kill me, lmao.

Posted by hikoro
Gemiguy

If your Virguy is in a depression right now, how do you expect him to chill?

Depression is a very harsh disorder.

Virgos don't deal very well with heartbreak either.

I think that you are going to have to be patient instead of expecting him to chill. And well, this may be a difficult thing to do for a gemini.

When I say he needs to chill, I mean he's mentioned how suicidal thoughts crept up into his head. I've luckily been around for him to vent his frustrations to. I've told him that if he ever feels that way again that he HAS to call me. When I say chill, I mean, he needs to relax and not let one person make him feel like he should end his life.

Posted by Prince_Pisces
Well he sounds like a mess to me,. . . i wouldnt be hanging around LOL!!!

I know what I like when I see it. I know something different when I see it. I feel a very strong connection to him and I don't mind dealing with his baggage.