anger management

i was thinking,when i get angry,i behave in a very different way than my usual self.
almost like jekyl/hyde syndrome.although i have more control over it now,but it was at its worse in my teens.sometimes it even shocked me.it was not a constant state,but more like violent eruptions.
but still,when i get angry,at first i try to control it,then it seethes and belows inside me,and i sometimes have to cut myself away from people in order to calm myself,atleast to a point where it is back in control.

so how do you all control and manage your anger?

i would sure like to improve.😛

I keep it to myself, unless it something just has to be done! By that point I have kept too much to myself and its over flowed. Im good at anger management for the most part.

this is besides the usual fights and arguments with siblings in the past...outside of that im good. 🙂

sibling are bloody pain in the ass.🙂P

he sounds like my friend.


in my case,the major problem area is that i sometimes am not able to control it,and i end up saying something so spiteful and painful to the other party,that it almosts ruins my rapport with them.
i am not a very picturesque scene when angry i guess.plus the obssessive need to be in control

yes that i do😛

getting away with murder is part of my charm😉

dang,atleast pluto know when its comming.she can handle me that way.

dxp ghosts?

we are brothers in arms

SSEXXMAANIAACC!

Must take into account testosterone ...

Some people just have to release it. My son still gets anger built up inside and he can't seem to control it at times .. it overwhelms him.

Instead of trying to difuse it, release it .. just make sure it isn't on someones head.
Go punch a tree a few times.

"So, I guess I just analyze it away or process it in some way, until I'm not angry anymore."

The thing with me is that if I keep going over stuff that has made me angry it stays in my system longer and turns sour rather than if I try to forget about it and move on.

I have a very nasty mouth when I build up enough steam about something. It doesn't generally achieve much beyond upsetting and offending the recipient of my verbal onslaught but it doesn't make them take on board the reason why I was angry.

But then the thing is that a lot of anger is due to the person feeling threatened and instead of dealing with the route cause of this they think that lashing out will make them seem mighty and fierce. It's very animalistic actually; much like the way cats make the fur on their backs stand up when they're confronted by a dog, to make them loog bigger and bolder etc.

So anger for me is very much linked with my esteem issues and needs to be worked on.

Vent .. express .. release ..

If you want to yell .. scream at the top of your lungs
If you want to cry .. weep away
If you want to punch .. go find a tree
If you have sexual tension .. the shower will wash it away
If you need to voice, but, can't .. pick up a pen & paper

The key is letting the feelings out, only then can you heal.

If you want to punch .. go find a tree





why trees man?
i don't want the ire of treehuggers and environmentalists.
punching bag is fine by me.😛
but i use it only in extreme cases.where i have no other meanes left,and the anger is not comming down

o i see that must be a girl thing then,because once an angry girl threw a pastry at me,for refusing to dance with her.crazy girls😛

I'm not sure how I act when I get angry, I haven't unleashed the beast yet.

So far I get really quiet, I look cross and I will be the meanest, nastiest person on the planet then I forget why I was mad because thats how mad I was at the time.

I'm scared of how I will be once I let go a little bit with my ex libra and I had to check myself because I would have did jail time on that one LOL!! Thank God for common sense or I would have lost it.

I'm lethal, my dark side is nothing to sneeze at or snooze on and I mean that literally.

the thing that bothers me the most about my anger is that,when it erupts,it erupts in a very destructive way,saying that i don't mean that i throw things or become violent(did some of that in my teens but not now),i literally spew venom.haahaa
the one who caused it gets punished beyond the required limit.the torrent of words just hits way too much.
ijust don't want to be that nasty.i really want to curb my nastiness.i say things which hurt the most,like bringing out the skeletons out that person's closet.

I'm silent with my anger (the worst kind) I will literraly shut you out, won't say a word until I'm ready and in my younger years I would walk away without a second thought, I'm not like that now, now days I will talk it out and discuss but back in the day I was lethal, even now I have to step away and take a minute to evaluate the situation but sometimes I want to say listen you bleep bleep bleep bleep shut the bleep up and kill yourself (Jamie Fox's words)but I never go that far, the worst I have ever done is do something evil and then talk to the person in an antagonizing manner as if to say come on do something about it and know I can't fight LOL!!

kris,we try😉

But it is all cooling now i am getting more wisdom maybe my sag rising as i am growing older .



then i must be going in for dementia>scorpio rising

destructive angers we have.

i am a very patient sort of a guy,usually i give the other party a chance to back off,and i try to avoid the ugly scenes.but once i get pushed beyond my anger threshold,it erupts into a fury,with words lashing out at the person causing the anger,jibing him with the very precise words as i know will cause harm.

i am cool and calm most of the time.but it is a different story once i get pushed way too much.

my rising is Taurus and I hear they can be very tempermental, borderline tyrant, I think I have managed pretty well considering.

i know kris,that is why i asked.heehee
i don't always wan't to end things in a mean way.if i can help
having a way with words can be a bad thing too😢

LMAO@Kris

Hey that sounds about right, not that I'm proud of that by association but I certainly understand why these men were despots, fortunately I have my anger under control, I would rather love than hate which is my strongest emotion but I have felt the heat of the beast and its not funny.

"I'm silent with my anger (the worst kind) I will literraly shut you out, won't say a word "

"I do that. It's non confrontational."

-UGH...that sounds just like my aqua boyfriend. that is how he deals with things...he doesn't!!! no confrontation whatsoever...
he is on the cusp of cap/aqua so maybe that comes from his cap side...

Yes I'm a Cap/Aqua baby, I do confront issues but not in the way others deal with it, its hard to explain, I'm not the type that doesn't deal with issues unless I'm done completely with you, I will walk away and forget you as if you never existed, maybe down the line weeks/months/days/years in most cases years with me, I will remember you but when I'm done, I am done.

I will blast on someone's ass if I have to but for the most part I don't deal with others in that way, I will say what I need to say and move on from it.

Capgirlinlustwithleo 5/15/2007 3:20:10 PM | ip: xxx.xxx.xxx.8

"UGH...that sounds just like my aqua boyfriend. that is how he deals with things...he doesn't!!! no confrontation whatsoever..."

I only do it after a confrontation. If someone forces me into a confrontation then I will withdraw from them afterwards because to me forcing me to get angry is the worst thing in the world.

I'm the same way, I feel like sometimes silence makes the other person dig deep inside and look at themselves and change it without me having to point the finger and say when are you going to change or why did you do or say that, my silence will make that person reflect on the situation and deal with it from that point, change has to come from within and me nagging or digging into his ass won't make him change, I talk but I'm a firm believer in allowing people to grow up without me having to point stuff out all the time. In most cases this works for me, silence doesn't have to be used as a weapon, it can be used as a learning device also.

I believe in dealing with the issue, if it's meant to be. I don't believe in dealing with an issue and making it worse. You have to make the right call, because some things are better left to working themselves out.

I concur

"If someone forces me into a confrontation then I will withdraw from them afterwards because to me forcing me to get angry is the worst thing in the world."

-yeah! that's how my boyfriend is...exactly!!! when we get into an arguement, i usually push him to the point where he just ignores me and acts as if i don't exist. and then, when he is ready to discuss things, he will come to me with it (and it's usually the next morning!).