tiffany3624
@tiffany3624
16 Years
Comments: 0 · Posts: 23 · Topics: 4
Aqua guy ends relationship will he be back?
When he 1st met you, he really liked you. He got caught up in the moment & in his emotions & from there, allowed his emotions to guide him. That's why he moved in with you & why he seemed to be perfectly ok with things moving so fast
But then he had an epiphany. He realized that things were moving too fast. He realized that he may have been making his decision to like you based on pure lust OR for all the wrong reasons. So he decided to back out now instead of him having to fend you off months down the road, when 1 or the both of you were too attached to let go
There's a reason Aquas are known for being so cautious & going so slow in love. It's b/c they hate being the person who makes impulsive decisions based on pure emotion alone. They trust their logic alot more. And if he'd been using his logic, he would've never moved in with you. Yes, he probably would've still dated you but things would've never gone too fast. So instead of trying to back-track & yet still keep you around, he thought it'd be better for him to let go completely. That was his way of slapping himself in the forehead for doing something every Aqua fears within themselves: rushing.
He was never comfortable with commitment. He's not comfortable OR ready to address/embrace any feelings he has for you. Despite what you may think, him letting you go now was actually a GOOD thing. In his mind, he's NOT being selfish & is doing you a favor by walking away, instead of giving you the false hope that he's comfortable being vulnerable & open with you.
He literally had a change of heart.
WHY he had a change of heart is only something HE knows. It could be that he was never emotionally available to begin with (and yes, moving in with someone requires a TON of emotional availability). He could still be harping over an ex or someone from the past. He may have been using you or felt pressured into moving in with you. He may have had lots of his family/friends in his ear telling him how much of an idiot he was for moving so fast with you (Aquas care ALOT about their loved one's opinions). Hell it could've been lots of reasons.
No you DON'T know that there's nobody else in the pic. To say that is to suggest that you know him very well. Obviously you don't or else you would've seen the breakup/his distance coming. But you didn't. Acknowledge that maybe you didn't know this guy as well as you'd thought.
You 2 could probably be friends later on, but not right now.
But then he had an epiphany. He realized that things were moving too fast. He realized that he may have been making his decision to like you based on pure lust OR for all the wrong reasons. So he decided to back out now instead of him having to fend you off months down the road, when 1 or the both of you were too attached to let go
There's a reason Aquas are known for being so cautious & going so slow in love. It's b/c they hate being the person who makes impulsive decisions based on pure emotion alone. They trust their logic alot more. And if he'd been using his logic, he would've never moved in with you. Yes, he probably would've still dated you but things would've never gone too fast. So instead of trying to back-track & yet still keep you around, he thought it'd be better for him to let go completely. That was his way of slapping himself in the forehead for doing something every Aqua fears within themselves: rushing.
He was never comfortable with commitment. He's not comfortable OR ready to address/embrace any feelings he has for you. Despite what you may think, him letting you go now was actually a GOOD thing. In his mind, he's NOT being selfish & is doing you a favor by walking away, instead of giving you the false hope that he's comfortable being vulnerable & open with you.
He literally had a change of heart.
WHY he had a change of heart is only something HE knows. It could be that he was never emotionally available to begin with (and yes, moving in with someone requires a TON of emotional availability). He could still be harping over an ex or someone from the past. He may have been using you or felt pressured into moving in with you. He may have had lots of his family/friends in his ear telling him how much of an idiot he was for moving so fast with you (Aquas care ALOT about their loved one's opinions). Hell it could've been lots of reasons.
No you DON'T know that there's nobody else in the pic. To say that is to suggest that you know him very well. Obviously you don't or else you would've seen the breakup/his distance coming. But you didn't. Acknowledge that maybe you didn't know this guy as well as you'd thought.
You 2 could probably be friends later on, but not right now.
It's simple. You want committment, he doesn't. You 2 may be compatible & may have the greatest chemistry in the world, BUT that doesn't mean anything if you're not BOTH on the same page.
Can you still be friends with him? Only YOU know how you are. Personally, I don't encourage people to try maintaining a friendship when emotions are present & high-strung. It only complicates things. It's damn near impossible to see someone as a companion, but yet know that you can only hold them to "friendship standards."
He may have said "never" now just as a defense mechanism; he probably didn't mean it "never" literally. BUT, at the same token, honey when a man tells you he doesn't want to be with you, he's usually DEAD serious.
Had the breakup happened 2+ years from now, I'd advise you that his "never" line was just something he was saying out of anger & that his love for you AND the foundation you both built, would eventually bring him back to you. BUT, you guys haven't been together long enough. Having chemistry & having a foundation are 2 completely DIFFERENT things.
He wasn't with you long enough to considering losing you to be such a big loss. I'm confident in that simply b/c he didn't hesitate walking away from you, especially so early on. Just shows that he doesn't consider you a loss. He may like you, but not ENOUGH (keyword) to consider himself an idiot for losing you. And there's a difference.
And with so many fish in the sea, he probably feels justified in knowing that persay he finally WERE to be ready for a relationship in the long run, 1. There'd be 100 new fish biting his bait & 2. You'd probably be so long gone that even if he did want you back, you wouldn't even want him
You guys can't be friends again until:
1. He can be honest with himself AND you about why he decided to run. Even friendships require 100% honesty
2. Neither of you are driven to make decisions based on your feelings for eachother
3. The BOTH of you are ok with just being friends. If friendship isn't what you want from him or period, don't settle for less than what you want & deserve. If committment is what you want, friendship with him will probably NEVER be ok, unless you have ulterior motives & expect for the friendship to magically turn into something more.
Take it as a loss. He's not ready for what you want. That's ALL that matters. You knowing WHY he's not ready WON'T change the fact & big picture that he's NOT ready.
Can you still be friends with him? Only YOU know how you are. Personally, I don't encourage people to try maintaining a friendship when emotions are present & high-strung. It only complicates things. It's damn near impossible to see someone as a companion, but yet know that you can only hold them to "friendship standards."
He may have said "never" now just as a defense mechanism; he probably didn't mean it "never" literally. BUT, at the same token, honey when a man tells you he doesn't want to be with you, he's usually DEAD serious.
Had the breakup happened 2+ years from now, I'd advise you that his "never" line was just something he was saying out of anger & that his love for you AND the foundation you both built, would eventually bring him back to you. BUT, you guys haven't been together long enough. Having chemistry & having a foundation are 2 completely DIFFERENT things.
He wasn't with you long enough to considering losing you to be such a big loss. I'm confident in that simply b/c he didn't hesitate walking away from you, especially so early on. Just shows that he doesn't consider you a loss. He may like you, but not ENOUGH (keyword) to consider himself an idiot for losing you. And there's a difference.
And with so many fish in the sea, he probably feels justified in knowing that persay he finally WERE to be ready for a relationship in the long run, 1. There'd be 100 new fish biting his bait & 2. You'd probably be so long gone that even if he did want you back, you wouldn't even want him
You guys can't be friends again until:
1. He can be honest with himself AND you about why he decided to run. Even friendships require 100% honesty
2. Neither of you are driven to make decisions based on your feelings for eachother
3. The BOTH of you are ok with just being friends. If friendship isn't what you want from him or period, don't settle for less than what you want & deserve. If committment is what you want, friendship with him will probably NEVER be ok, unless you have ulterior motives & expect for the friendship to magically turn into something more.
Take it as a loss. He's not ready for what you want. That's ALL that matters. You knowing WHY he's not ready WON'T change the fact & big picture that he's NOT ready.
He doesn't want a relationship with you. He's made that VERY clear both in action and speech.
As hard as that is, you need to work on accepting that.
If you don't feel you can be just friends then say no to it because it's not a nice situation to be in if you're continually hoping for more but aren't getting more.
He may be ready, he may not be - regardless, he doesn't want to be in a relationship with you.
Relationships are like jigsaw puzzles. They have all these pieces that fit together. Sometimes some of the pieces are missing and it doesn't work out. It doesn't make you a horrible person, or him a horrible person - it simply means you aren't a complete picture together even if one of you believes that you are.
Hugs xx
As hard as that is, you need to work on accepting that.
If you don't feel you can be just friends then say no to it because it's not a nice situation to be in if you're continually hoping for more but aren't getting more.
He may be ready, he may not be - regardless, he doesn't want to be in a relationship with you.
Relationships are like jigsaw puzzles. They have all these pieces that fit together. Sometimes some of the pieces are missing and it doesn't work out. It doesn't make you a horrible person, or him a horrible person - it simply means you aren't a complete picture together even if one of you believes that you are.
Hugs xx
6 weeks in general does not qualify for a meaningful relationship of any kind.
Unless y'all eloped/got married
Unless y'all eloped/got married
Should I be friends with him? It's your decision. If you feel that you can just be friends with this guy then go for it. But if you feel that you are going to read too much into what he says or does, and try to win him back, then I think it would be best to not be friends, as you may end just hurting yourself even further.
What does that mean to an Aqua? Well we??re all different. I'm still —friends?? with a few of my ex-girlfriends but let me be the first to say that we rarely ever speak. The fact is, we move on, find new people, new relationships etc. It is a two way street.
And will he ever consider starting a relationship again with me, even when he did say never? I think you??ve answered your own question there. He has said —never?? and I think he will stick with that decision. By saying what he has said, he hasn't left anything open for the future.
What does that mean to an Aqua? Well we??re all different. I'm still —friends?? with a few of my ex-girlfriends but let me be the first to say that we rarely ever speak. The fact is, we move on, find new people, new relationships etc. It is a two way street.
And will he ever consider starting a relationship again with me, even when he did say never? I think you??ve answered your own question there. He has said —never?? and I think he will stick with that decision. By saying what he has said, he hasn't left anything open for the future.
Real Conversations Since 2000
dxpnet has been home to open discussions and shared experiences for over 25 years. If you value independent communities, you can support the site below.
Every contribution helps keep dxpnet independent and ad-light.
Join the Conversation. Explore Yourself. Connect with Others.
Discover insights, swap stories, and find people. dxpnet is where experiences turn into understanding.
Create Your Free Account →Related Topics
Everyone knows that as an Aqua, I don't typically get along with Gems. BUT now that I really think about it, you guys do
I'm not gonna write a list of 100 Aquarian flaws just to stroke another sign's ego. Truth is, there are alot of GREAT th
recently, bff (AQUA) told me how she was aggravated w/ a certain topic at work & then went home to find her hubby ignite
Ok so my aqua bf of 2 years is very attentive and all...when we're ALONE. However when we're hanging out with friends or
I really felt this weekend my whole being was in questioned. i seriously think I HAVE a.d.d. most of my aqua friends hav
I have been on and off with a Aqua since october.I have posted about this in another thread ..anyway since the last time
Its always said that aquas are so cold and aloof and that when they run they dont care... but does it HAVE to be this
I was wondering if i'm screwing things up with this aquarius. When he text to say he miss me or to say things like he c
We hate when others disappear on us, especially when they won't tell us why or give us a heads up. We hate being in situ
I am a gemini and met this aqua guy 6 weeks ago. We both decided that we would give a relationship a go. And it was fabulous he was so attentive and did some many nice things for me and me for him too. We did lots together and really enjoys each others company so we both decided we would move in together...which both of us were scared. So in the end he actually moved in for a week and then took his old place back...but we still continued on with our relationship until about 2 weeks ago. i questioned his ability to commit and then he completely ignored me and this drove me crazy (I hate that) then he sends me a text saying that this relationship isnt working out and he wants to be on his own and he has some things to do. So I try to question the whole thing again. We ended up talking on phone one morning. We talked about what was happening and he said that he just wants to be friends.....and of course I said thats what all men say after a breakup. So I was in his area of town where he works and I brought him a coffee (I asked first) and that was the first time we had seen each other in a week. There were lots of hug and he kissed me good-bye. We could both feel the chemistry and he suddenly to go. So this week we have talked a bit, texted etc...no much though. He wants to hang out on the weekend someday but I am not sure which day...we is fine as I like this last minute planning. I did ask him if there was ever a chance in the future that we could re-start and he didnt want to answer me at first and then he finally said no..never.
My questions are: Should I be friends with him? What does that mean to an Aqua? And will he ever consider starting a relationship again with me, even when he did say never. BTW I know there is nobody else.
Please help! Would love to hear from Aqua's