Aquarius guy is acting weird...?

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magic38
@magic38
18 Years

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Ok , so heres the deal, I'm a LEO girl and have know this aqua guy for well over a year and we have a very intimate relationship ( we talk amd relax, but thats it!) We don't go out at all.
He use to dissapear every 2-3 months, but since I have confronted him on that numerous times, he promised to stop and he has kept his word,which is good.
BUT, here is the deal, he will once in awhile say to me, that I can come and go as I please, and he is not forcing me to do anything that I don't want to do. Which is true, BUT if I go for too long of time, he begs for me to come back.
If I have a problem, he listens , if I'm uncomfortable, he is there but he tells me he doesn't want a commitment cuz its too much to worry about, and he works a hell of a lot, so maybe thats it?
What I need to know from everyone, ESPECIALLY AQUA MEN OR AQAU SIGNS, am I wasting my time or do you think I should be patient? I really like this guy and I think he likes me too (also, he was ready to get married 3 years back and the wedding was called off, never explained to me why though)
I like him and I know we are polar opposties, but I feel there is a bond. Its like hes shy to say what he wants to. I feel he cares but I think he won't admit it, so what am I to do? Is he playing a game with me? And aquas, if your with someone like that, do you fool around with many people at once traeting them the same way without feeling guilt or do you usually stick to that one person? He confuses me to the point of no return, but maybe thats the attraction of an aqua. Please help me out. Thanks guys.
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amethystaquamarine
@amethystaquamarine
18 YearsScorpio

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Please don't wait for him. The Aqua guy I was with told me that if he had me, he would marry me right away. He even brought home to meet his parents. When we finally got together we would only meet once a week if I was lucky. I tried breaking up with him twice, but he told me to wait. Now he tells me he's not ready for a commitment and wants to be free to meet other girls, totally the opposite of what he told me before we got together. Listen to Leokitten, if this is not the relationship you want, then move on. No use holding on to that small pinch of hope. If he's mature enough and ready to be in a committed relationship he wouldn't be treating you this way.
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magic38
@magic38
18 Years

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Well guys,im 20, and he is 9 1/2 years older than me, BUT he has said that age doesn't matter. He is now starting to do that thing where I am texting him and instead of responding , or saying anything back , he doesn't.
Hmm, he doesn't really go out a lot, he is very busy with work anymore , or what he tells me, he rarely goes out anymore. If he does, its for a drink with his buddies.
I don't want to be selfish or anything, but I don't think I should be playing second best to no-one, When we talk about emotions or going out or anything, the last time we did talk, his eyes started to get glassy like he was ready to cry.
I like him, I don't like his stubborness or moodswings, or empty explanations for things. And, say if I stay away from him for a little while, he knows where I work, and will most likely come in and beg consistantly. I feel kinda trapped, like he won't go away, but then when I come around , he is no where to be found. Is this aqua behavior: where he's available then he's not. You guys gotta help me.
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magic38
@magic38
18 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 10 · Topics: 4

THis post is sorta long....but here goes.
Thanks Hotlovinggirl for the advice, I actually have read your message before, thats what got me onto this message board. I know that I am very young, but with working full time and school full time, its hard to "get out there", if ya know what I mean. Theres guys out there, but I always compare them to him, and it may be wrong, but I do that, I don't know if you do that with your aqua man.
But, its weird that he doesn't want to go out, but he always tells me he doesn't go out much anyways, and all he does is work , come home and fall asleep next to his fairly new dog, which I think he likes her more than me..
He gets to be very evasive with me, at one point in time we will click and then he acts like he hates me, BUT he told me its becasue I PUSH his BUTTONS, which sounds weird to me cuz I'm not known to do that to people. Being a Leo, I usually get along with everyone A-OK, butI dunno...I know hes older than me, and I have brought up to him how maybe cause I am younger he is acting like this. But he insists no.
He'll say that we are on sorta like a different page then if we were just friends hanging out now and then, like he says its different when he hangs out with his friends then IF he would hang out with me in public.
But Hotlovinggirl, I gotta know why he's ignoring my txt messages?? Its super weird, he told me he wouldn't run off anymore, and now its like he's doing just that....RUNNING OFF for NO REASON at all..
If I just accept this, I fear I will have no solid structure of a dating life because I'll be thinking about him-- I think my emotions have gotten into the half of things and the more I PULL away, I can almost garentee he will step in or step it up a notch... CONFUSED STILL...
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Sadge22
@Sadge22
18 Years

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I just want to Add for the record, that I can see why statements are often made regarding blaming the sign for someone's behaviour...

In a lot of the messages I read in this thread, it is blatent that people are being mis-treated, and shat on, but the aquarian excuse is being used....

Lady M, Leokitten, Spatch, and UC, however different they are in their delivery, try to get this point accross to folks here time and time again.... and I see it now.

I see how it can be frustrating trying to explain to someone that he's just a DICK, and it has nothing to do with being born between Jan20 and Feb18 lol



That's all...

🙂
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magic38
@magic38
18 Years

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Hotlovinggirl, I'll take your advice over anyone else's for the time being. I am going to hold my place and not see him UNTIL we are out in a public place. I think he is afraid to get into a relationship, cause he mentioned once that he had a fiance , and he was with her for 3 years..the wedding was broken off, he didn't explain why, and I didn't feel the need to ask.
And as for the comment about age. He has told me that age doesn't matter to him.., is that a him thing or an AQUA thing? Also, can't stand guys my age, they are very unestablished, immature, and don't respect me in the way this AQUA does..., its the weirdest feeling I have ever felt from a person. Just like a weird ora or something. Does anyone know what I mean?Dunno, he doesn't act like 29, he acts like hes 26. But, I will stand my ground . Do I just have to wait for him to break Hotlovinggirl??
Oh yeah and his dog will be a year old I believe in December or so..., so she(the puppy he has) is I would say 10-11 months old. Just come back with a comment if you have any. Thanks everyone.
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Lady_M
@Lady_M
19 Years10,000+ Posts

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___We like older men because they are 'established', less immature, etc...whatever else you've named.
___They like us because we are not jaded yet, more optimistic, less grounded/unestablished,(I wont say naive, not all of us are naive)...in short fun...as oppose to the women there age.
___The women there age are less likely to take the BS, more established, or just un-attracted to the men their age (see above reasons)...vice versa...its a vicious circle😛


As for magic...live life.
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magic38
@magic38
18 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 10 · Topics: 4
I agree with Hotlovinggirl. If you are both in a relationship for the same reasons, then it doesn't matter if it meets societies standards. When did there become such a standard anyways? BTW, he wasn' txting me back, so I thought he was avoiding/ignoring me, but he forgot to tell me or probably thought he did tell that he was going on vacation with his guy friend to Europe.
Weird, but American cellphones get no reception there. He got home yesterday. But anywho, if some people disagrees that aquas aren't weird and that its just the man in general that is acting weird should double check their own records. I have a couple guy friends who act by their sign , not because I'm convinced they do, its becasue they get it, thats what they accept.
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AnnoyedCancer
@AnnoyedCancer
18 YearsCancer

Comments: 0 · Posts: 327 · Topics: 40
Guys, I need some help.
Trying to understand Aqua men, the message board, seems to not be flowing.
In any case, Im dating an aqua man and i am a cancer.
I am very high tempered, and he puts up with it. But if it were me, I wouldn't.
Now, I've noticed that he has become like I would have become if he were like me, kind of like, "You want to be all bitchy and annoyed, alright, go ahead. But I won't bother."
Which is wierd, because he is very caring. But, As I've read on these boards, I'm guessing that he has finally come to his cold stage.
On friday (Our 11th month anniversary) I would call him to tell him something, and he would be kind of aloof. And then, when we came back from one of his schools football games, he tells me, "Wouldn't you like to spend time with your friends, like me, have a guy's day out?" And I said, " Are you telling me you need some space?" and he said, "No, I would just like a day to hang out with the guys."
Which is completely fine with me, just as long as those guy girlfriends or girls in other words are there. Because then why the hell couldnt I go?
So, whatever.
Yesterday, we went to go see Saw 4 (which sucked), and on the way, I'm playing around and I mention the space issue to him and somehow he pops up with " You don't think we spend alot of time together?" and I say, " Well, is that a bad thing?" and he says, "No, because I like the time but I do think we spend alot of time together." So, now, from two days I have been as sweet as can be.
Because I DO understand I get angry alot and I need to stop.
But what has replaced my anger is sadness.
I've been sad all these days, because I think there is something wrong with him.
What I dont get however, is why he is still so loving and cuddly all the time.
At the movies, I sat next to him but far away, and he would pull me in, and always be the one to put him head on my shoulder, and kiss me.
I remained aloof all throughout the night.
I told him I would stay in today, and not go over. My parent's are making fish, which he loves,and would drop everything in a heartbeat just to come.
I won't even mention it.

And guys, sorry this is so long, and if you could please give me some advice.
Thanks 🙂
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AnnoyedCancer
@AnnoyedCancer
18 YearsCancer

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But thats it.
I dont arrange the outings.
He TELLS ME to plan something.
And everytime, or really, for example, one time his friend had a get together, I said, "why dont we go to that?" and he said he didnt want to.
I dont force him to do anything.
He says he rather spend time with me than with his friends.
Which is why I dont understand.
I tell him to call up his friends all the freaking time. Which annoys me because he never does.
I've had to call up his friend Luis and make plans all the time.
He never makes plans.
I can't be held accountable because his friends don't do as much as mine.
That, and his friends never seem to make up their minds. We spent a couple of weeks seeing if some girl friend of his was going to do something.
I dont force him to come with me, he claims he perfers it.
So, that is why I dont understand.
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JUstanAquaGuy
@JUstanAquaGuy
18 Years

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Hey girls.. what u girls said are quite true. let me clarify, yes aqua guys act weird sometimes. they tend to be aloof,they are shy, they cant resist to be ignored. what else.. actually what u guys discussed here.. all ever happened to me. when i was age 20-23, i fooled around with lots of girls, i didnt want a serious commitment. i tend to get away pretty much when my ex "are u ready for commitment?". I loved freedom, i loved hanging out with friends. i ever dumped my ex cos she wanted to see me 24/7. didnt allow me to hang out with my friends. At my age,25. they will realize its time for them to settle down, so be patience!

WELL, u just have to understand an aquarian. the best way u can do is try to ignore him, make him jealous ( but not too much), dont try to call him more than once ( if he doesnt pick up the phone, that means he wants to be alone), aquarian never make plans ( i like girls who can make a plan). i hope that enough, i cant think at the moment.

What attracts me: stylish girls( try to be fashionable), makeup ( try to look different but not too much). I cant really think atm..

Hope that helps..
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AnnoyedCancer
@AnnoyedCancer
18 YearsCancer

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Listen, I don't want to plan any wedding.
I don't want to get married period.
I understand that its not forever, and I've told him that.
And his response to that is that I am putting a time limit on things.
And, I honestly don't think its me all the time.
He was the one who came up with the seeing eachother almost everyday bit when he asks me to come over all the time.
And, back to the "mom making fish thing"
He called, and I told him I was at my friends house doing home work and I told him I would bring him fish sometime like on friday.
And he said EXACTLY "Oh, why didnt you tell me, I would have been there right now. Why didn't you tell me?" and I said, " well, I need to do homework and you told me that you have a debate and I want you to be able to finish it." And he says, " GAH! Well, are you going to be done anytime soon?" And I said, " Well, if I get it all done then I'll see." And he says, "alright, call me please."
So you see, its not all me.
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AnnoyedCancer
@AnnoyedCancer
18 YearsCancer

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Leokitten, just because I capitalize my words doesn't mean I am mad.
Nor am I mad that he called, I'm just mentioning it because I don't see how I am clingy if he calls me more than I do (which is barely ever).
I love it that he calls, and that he cares. I only was lost on the space thing.
And you can kind of see it now, because he asserts himself way more than I do.
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AQUAFAIRY
@AQUAFAIRY
18 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 27 · Topics: 7
Your aqua man seems to be relunctant to jump into a committment especially since he was very close to making the ultimate committment and things went sour. Be patient and give him space if it's meant to be trust, aquas are very intuitive and know when things are right (i'm an aqua myself) he will come to you and even share the details of his past hurt in due time. We are so hard to love because when we do love (not that often) we love very hard and our secret most greatest fear is that of rejection. So my advice is to be very gentle he's very sensitive even if he hides it. He is probably gauging you also when he says it's ok for you to see others just to see if you are really into him. Don't ask but we can be very twisted at times. LOl
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moonchild8
@moonchild8
19 Years1,000+ Posts

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"I think he is saying you are devoting too much of your life to the relationship...your focus solely on the relationship is stifling him. him saying he wants a guys day is really a message for you to start having your own life too. fromt he way you write...sounds like you are all about "us" 24/7....back off a bit. you can have a good "us" and still be individuals. it is healthier."

-i agree with leokitten on this one! so, annoyedcancer...i really think you should take her advice in regards to your situation with the aqua guy. i am also a cancer dating an aqua guy, and at that stage in the game (11 months) i was where you are. and it got me NOWHERE!!! so, you need to stop putting him on a pedestal and you need to invest more time for yourself and you life. he will respect you and love you that much more if you do. trust me...don't make the same mistake that i did.
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AnnoyedCancer
@AnnoyedCancer
18 YearsCancer

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Hmmm, well, let me see...mine says:
Well, do the degrees matter?
Lol, ok, ONCE again!

Rising sign 20 degrees in Scorpio
Sun sign 01 degrees in Cancer
Moon sign 15 degrees in Aquarius

Me and my boyfriend, are complete opposites sometimes.
But I love that, because if I have someone who agrees with me all the time and doesn't fight agaisnt my views I would go crazy.
I don't enjoy submissive people, I like the difficult ones that take plenty of work. It always pays off in the end 🙂
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Lady_M
@Lady_M
19 Years10,000+ Posts

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Cancer aqua parings aren't the easiest (damn! and you got a scorpio rising!! double damn!)...its nice to see you trying to understand your guy....and trying to change the error of your ways. Stay true to yourself as well.

Im assuming your aqua is as young as you...and this could possibly be his first serious relationship...you need to understand you have a VERY good aqua guy (from what you type), since you've got him before all the bullshit baggage.
Appreciate him; try to minimize the drama for both your sakes.
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AnnoyedCancer
@AnnoyedCancer
18 YearsCancer

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Lady M, I am trying because honestly, I don't know how he puts up with me!
My mother even says " 11 months, poor thing!" Lol.
And leokitten, it hasn't really happened to me before but I would wonder where he was. He did go on vacation (which I wasn't able to attend) for a week and we barely texted nor talked on the phone, I was fine with that. And there was a day were he didn't call for a day which he explained as "time off" (which I've also done) and I accepted it.
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moonchild8
@moonchild8
19 Years1,000+ Posts

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"Thanks moonchild
But, did your aqua want space but didnt leave you alone?"

-my aqua broke up with me twice in the past...and he also has been very clear about wanting his space throughout the relationship. so, he is BIG on doing his own thing...BUT, the second that i ignore him for a while and live my life and do my own thing, is when he doesn't leave me alone 🙂