I was wondering what is your take on first love and/or/vs true love?
* What does true love mean to you? Like is it when you're married or what? * How does one end up becoming your first love (I know it's just the first gf or first kiss... or is it)? how about true love? * I've read everywhere, you never forget your "first love" but what if you found someone new? * What's the difference between how you feel about first love and true love? * Do you believe they are one in the same or could they be different people? * Would you maintain your friendship with your first love if you found true love (not just another relationship)? * Would you ever cut ties to your first love BECAUSE of your true love? Is it even possible to cut it off? * Will that "first love" ever disappear in your head or does it really become a distant memory - where you're watching a parallel universe of THAT life with your first love vs the new one? Does that even occur? Would you look back? * Would you ever cut ties to your first love BECAUSE of your true love? * Would you think about your first love while you're with your true love? or is it when you're alone? * What kinda person would be considered "the one" for you? Would you tell them they are "the one"? * If you had to choose between the person who FIRST captured your heart (but would probably break it) vs the person who you know will help you grow into a better person/stable (not lovey and magical like the first one), what would you pick? * What sign was your first love and why?
The questions sound kinda elementary school-ish and down right personal (also lengthy and redundant), but I am really curious to see what you guys think/feel about it. Not here to make conclusions - just a better understanding!
As a Taurus, I remember my first love and all the hardships, happiness, sorrows etc, but that definitely will not interfere with any new relationship I will have nor will I ever look back or want that relationship EVER because I know what's good for me. Sure there's a 'place' in my heart, but really I wouldn't want to talk to the person or even be in contact - I just want to be on mutual terms. Aquarius, on the other hand like to maintain their friendships (am I right or wrong? or do they want to maintain a good term relationship?).
NOTE: You do not need to answer any of the questions.I just want to get your idea on first love and/or/vs true love and compare it to my views
i have venus in aqua, i find your post very interesting.
* What sign was your first love and why?
that was a sagittarius. he made me feel safe, wanted and protected. he mentally challenged me and he was very open. emotionally, he 'got' me.
* If you had to choose between the person who FIRST captured your heart (but would probably break it) vs the person who you know will help you grow into a better person/stable (not lovey and magical like the first one), what would you pick?
probably the person who would help me grow...i don't think the lovey/magical stuff is substantial. or there's an element of fantasy to it that doesn't stand up in the everyday world. though in my situation, the person did both.
* What kinda person would be considered "the one" for you? Would you tell them they are "the one"?
someone who's a challenge. they're exciting, smart & passionate. they can express how they feel without being over-emotional about it. they can teach me, as well as learn from me. they'd respect my space. they see beyond the surface level of people and deal with them on a spiritual level. i suppose it'd take me awhile to tell them they were 'the one'. eventually, they'd know but i would be wary about voicing it. think it spoils the 'magic' of it, somehow.
* Would you think about your first love while you're with your true love? or is it when you're alone? they would probably cross my mind, yeah. maybe in a comparing sense, or because i was feeling familiar emotions for both people, obv in different time periods.
* Would you ever cut ties to your first love BECAUSE of your true love?
not voluntarily, no. but if it threatened my new man we'd have to compromise. i'd have to know why it bothered him because i have my friends and i'm loyal to them. why should i cut that person off? they're a part of me too...basically, it's a freedom issue. i don't want to be told what to do. unless there is seriously good reason for it.
* I've read everywhere, you never forget your "first love" but what if you found someone new?
it really depends...over time, your first love isn't so relevant. it feels intense at the time because it's your first exposure to love and first experiences tend to shape your perception of things. as long as it's healthy and not a case of pining, regret or nostalgia, i don't think the first love would be a threat to the new person.
also, i see first love like a test run. it has so much to teach you about yourself,
who you are as a partner, what you emotionally respond to and so on. i imagine true love feels like coming home, and your first love the beginning of that journey 🙂
* What's the difference between how you feel about first love and true love? * Do you believe they are one in the same or could they be different people? -------------------
There IS a difference b/w someone's "first love" & their "true love."
The difference being...most of us find our "first love" when we are young. Then we go on to find our "true love" much later in life when we're actually adults & have grown into ourselves & know a little bit more about love & what it takes.
There's a perfect someone for us when we're young, just like there is when we get older.
With Aquas, it's kinda like "You break, you buy." Once an Aqua has actually opened themselves up to you FULLY (most people never get to see that side of their Aqua), that Aqua will forever be yours, emotionally.
They may move on physically, but emotionally? Nope. They'll always have a place in their hearts for the 1 or few people who actually got them to give their all.
**Would you ever cut ties to your first love BECAUSE of your true love?
Depends on the circumstances. Although I still have a place in my heart for my 1st love, he's considered off limits to me now b/c he's also married & has children.
And I'm old-school in that I don't believe people who have had THAT level of feelings for eachother, can truly be friends w/o something re-sparking again.
So for me, if I wanted to be friends with my 1st love I could, BUT I choose not to b/c of my husband (my true love) & the fact that it'd be unfair.
I believe, once we've experienced a "1st love" everyone else afterwards gets compared to them. Kind of like children comparing everyone they date to their parents b/c their parents were the 1st male/female they ever met & who had the biggest impact on them.
*What kinda person would be considered "the one" for you? Would you tell them they are "the one"?
It's not something you can describe or "list" out. It's just something you "know." And there's only been 2 men in my entire life that gave me that "I just know" feeling & yes, both of them knew.
By the time it even gets to the point where I "know" I'm already comfortable enough with them to tell them anything. That's a huge part of & mark of a great relationship to come...the fact that you can be 100% open/honest/vulnerable with your feelings.
---------- * If you had to choose between the person who FIRST captured your heart (but would probably break it) vs the person who you know will help you grow into a better person/stable (not lovey and magical like the first one), what would you pick?
Well just like with anything else, ex's are ex's for a reason. My 1st love was right for me then, BUT isn't right for me right now, which is perhaps why we're not together
So I wouldn't go back to someone, regardless of what kind of magical feelings they sparked in me years ago, simply b/c I'm a firm believer that there's no such thing as "the one." In each person's lifetime, there will be plenty of people willing to love you & give you the things you want. Finding those people may be the challenge, BUT they're actually out there.
It wouldn't do me any good to be with someone b/c of how much they loved me or did for me back then. It's about the now. And if a person's true love is fulfilling those needs just like OR even better than their 1st love, it wouldn't make sense to go backwards. ------
* What sign was your first love and why?
He was a Libra. We were so different but yet so alike. What 1 lacked (affection, for example), he made up for & vice versa. That's how we grew our incredible bond. We both wanted the same things & when 1 of us was having trouble being or doing something, the other pushed & supported the other into it. Kind of like a parent teaching their child how to walk & BOTH parent & child being proud & having a stronger bond once the once-impossible becomes possible.
I think 1st loves are like soulmates in that they're not actually the people we usually end up with long term.
No, they're there to 1st teach us how to love, what love means & how to express is so that when we actually do become adults, grow up & go onto meet others, that we'll be "seasoned, experienced & mature enough to actually handle the kind of love & relationship that we were probably too young/immature to experience when we were younger
Kind of like a parent who raises their children in hopes that someday their children will excerisize all the morals/values/habits they've taught them. The goal isn't for the child to become an adult & still live there. No, the goal is for the child to venture out so that when they start their OWN family, they'll already have the tools & "lessons learned"
My 1st love taught me what love is. First anything's will always last longer in your memory, well b/c they were a "first."
BUT, from my 1st love, I learned how to truly love my true love, who is my husband.
It never made sense to me to keep on investing time/love into someone who is never right for me. Yes, I'm grateful for my 1st love, BUT I'm more happy (since I'm more mature & experienced) with my true love now.
Thank you nimbue and krysrenee7! I really appreciate your answers A LOT (I am also a sucker for long posts - there's a lot of time, work, and consideration for these questions so I understand).
I suppose my next questions would be:
Did you ever find your true love? Do you believe at love at first sight? Or in fate (when it comes to love)? How did you get over your first love? Do you still keep in touch with them? Also do you believe in the four kinds of love? (it's not the C.S Lewis book, but the idea that there are four loves: Love yourself, Someone who loves you more than you love them, Someone who YOU love more than THEY love you, and Someone who is there at the right place and time)
What did you have to do to achieve your state of 'true love'? Was it by being alone? Was there any motivation? Any help? How long did it take to overcome your personal hurdles to get love?
Did pride ever get in the way of love? Like anything that you feel like YOU must be in control?
I ask a lot of questions, but feel free to answer any one of them. I know I am throwing that word 'love' almost carelessly, but I respect it to the utmost care. Again, just curious so I gain a better understanding :]
Nimbue: I would like to think that you think of love as something magical even in true love? Though I'm not saying magical as in a spark and it vanishes forever - really to go with your analogy of the home. A first love could be seen as an eye opener considering sparks do make you O_O! So true love would be that same spark to you except you know how to capture it and maintain it? Home is an interesting analogy that's all 😄
Mmm a familiar feeling for the first love AND the true love? Why would there be a comparison? Would it be towards the feelings or what factors play into this comparison per se (like "yay magical feelings vs developed feelings)?
I like that idea, that the first love isn't relevant with the new one, yet it's funny because it is what shapes your future about love - IN A SENSE, right? And a feeling of nostalgia? Would it be more like a reminder of how you've grown when it comes to the topic of love?
krysrenee7: I think that's an interesting term... "soulmates" I mean I usually associate soulmate and love synonymously. It seems to me your definition of 'soulmates' refers to someone who gives you a lesson or is a teacher almost? Have you found a soulmate? Or would you equate that with your first love?
And I like your analogy about... well love in general for each question. It's interesting since I was younger I wouldn't think of love as anything being on different times; rather that it can be only one person. Of course, we find stories and movies that portray that those dramatic love scenes, but really it's a good growing experience. And it sucks (well not really because you learn... hopefully) but it sucks because you really do end up going through a lot of emotional pains because of love.
How about situations where people do keep in contact with their first love? Why is that? Is it because in the end despite them being your "first love", maybe it wasn't that they were your first love, but rather something that tripped you on the sidewalk and when you looked up, the person who caught you turns out to be the love of your life? So rather than them being a first love, it's something that is awaken in you? And not everyone is going to remember "oh yeah I tripped on this rock specially" but rather along the lines of "Oh I tripped on a rock and that's how I met my love" ? So really we can label that trip as a 'first love', but it's "something" that woke up something inside of you. I don't know if you get what I mean... 🦇
Interesting... anyone afterwards would be compared to your first love. So how would person even find someone that is more magical and better than your first love? Is it something YOU had to find? Or they found you? Or it's more 'fated'?
You say aqua will always have a place in their hearts for the person that they've given their ALL to... Can I assume you have a place for your first love AND true love? Or is this place in the heart meant you had them in your heart at different times?
"You break it, you buy it" that's an interesting way of having an Aquarius... is this why when an Aqua has fully exposed themselves to someone and if that someone breaks away from them... the Aqua will always have that lingering feeling?
Yeah it IS true when they say aquas never 4get their first love. I always used to compare my first love to any current boyfren ALL THE TIME until we reconnected years later & I realized I'd never b interested lol. So that "what if" idea was nixed haha. But even though I'm not into him romantically n e more, the little things he did for me when we were younger is like a precious memory that I'll never 4get. Which is weird b/c I've had boyfriends go above & BEYOND on the romance meter, yet no amount of flowers, gifts, or trips around the world will hold a permanent place in my memory hall of fame lol. Its like the memory of my first forever has a special place in my heart even though we're just & will always b just friends.
Hope this helped!
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I was wondering what is your take on first love and/or/vs true love?
* What does true love mean to you? Like is it when you're married or what?
* How does one end up becoming your first love (I know it's just the first gf or first kiss... or is it)? how about true love?
* I've read everywhere, you never forget your "first love" but what if you found someone new?
* What's the difference between how you feel about first love and true love?
* Do you believe they are one in the same or could they be different people?
* Would you maintain your friendship with your first love if you found true love (not just another relationship)?
* Would you ever cut ties to your first love BECAUSE of your true love? Is it even possible to cut it off?
* Will that "first love" ever disappear in your head or does it really become a distant memory - where you're watching a parallel universe of THAT life with your first love vs the new one? Does that even occur? Would you look back?
* Would you ever cut ties to your first love BECAUSE of your true love?
* Would you think about your first love while you're with your true love? or is it when you're alone?
* What kinda person would be considered "the one" for you? Would you tell them they are "the one"?
* If you had to choose between the person who FIRST captured your heart (but would probably break it) vs the person who you know will help you grow into a better person/stable (not lovey and magical like the first one), what would you pick?
* What sign was your first love and why?
The questions sound kinda elementary school-ish and down right personal (also lengthy and redundant), but I am really curious to see what you guys think/feel about it. Not here to make conclusions - just a better understanding!
As a Taurus, I remember my first love and all the hardships, happiness, sorrows etc, but that definitely will not interfere with any new relationship I will have nor will I ever look back or want that relationship EVER because I know what's good for me. Sure there's a 'place' in my heart, but really I wouldn't want to talk to the person or even be in contact - I just want to be on mutual terms. Aquarius, on the other hand like to maintain their friendships (am I right or wrong? or do they want to maintain a good term relationship?).
NOTE: You do not need to answer any of the questions.I just want to get your idea on first love and/or/vs true love and compare it to my views