HELP! Aquarius is driving me (Scorpio) insane!

Hi guys! First time poster, long time lurker.

I have know this Aquarius for about a year and he's driving me absolutely insane. I should mention, before I tell you my shenanigans, that I am a Scorpio female and yes, I do know that him and I are one of the worst combinations possible. Still, I need your help and expertise in order to stay the least bit sane!

We both started to work together at this company around the same time. We quickly became part of the same group of friends and hung out a lot, at and off work. I didn't think much of him at the time, plus I had a boyfriend. Then, something clicked and I saw him a whole lot differently. I had butterflies everytime he walked into the office. Insane!

One time, a week after breaking up with my then boyfriend (for other reasons), me, Aquarius and a bunch of our friends go out to a club. Now, he knows at this point that I am single, so he buys me drinks, is super affectionate, and even tries to kiss me. We end up not doing it but we hold hands as we go home.

Next day at work, Aquarius starts to act off by avoiding me at all costs. I try to be my usual self, although dying inside. Same week, we go out again and he FREAKS OUT.

During the night I try to be extra friendly to brush off any awkwardness (he's still my friend, after all) and he explodes in the middle of the club. Says I should not be coming on too him so strong (I wasn't), says we can not even kiss since we work together, even tough he really likes me. At the end of the night, still begs me to come home with him.

The next week I find out through a mutual friend that he has been talking to her saying that he is freaked out. Saying that he likes me a lot but is scared to have a relationship with me, since we work together and such. My friend says he looks desesperate. Also, she told me she advised him to talk to me and talk things out, which I eagerly expected to happened.

But it doesn't. Of course.

So I talk to him. I don't tell him that I know what he has been saying to my friend but I do let him what I believe his going on. He denies everything, says I should stop coming on to him and offends me to no end. This time I explode and say that he shouldn't talk to me ever again.

Flash forward a couple of months and I decide to put all this behind and act like a normal person towards him. He is friendly enough and I leave the company, not hearing about him for a while.

Then, we meet again at a mutual friends party and the initial awkwardness there might have been disappears after a drink or two. We go out after and BAM - full on make out session. Months and months of sexual tension released. This time he does not freak out but does spill his feelings, saying that he misses me at work, saying that he's not going to be just another hookup, trying to hold my hand as we leave and hug me.

Point: I was wasted by the end of the night and seriously trying to keep it together. Although he was saying really sweet things, I responded a bit agressively and let go of him when he tried to hold hands. Shame on me, I know.

I come home however, expecting this time at least a nice little text. A day goes by, nothing. Two days go by, nothing. On the third day, I text him asking where did all his Friday chattiness had gone. He only replies good morning. Nothing else. I freak out and say, "look there has been a lack of communication and it's staying that way". No response.

This is where am at right now. I cannot with this guy! I know that Aquarius can be tough but damn! I'm not expecting a relationship but I am expecting minimum interest. Every hookup of mine has at least texted me once afterwards. He is my friend and he cannot do that? What is going on? I am so beyond tired figuring him out. I need your help! What should I do?

Sorry for the long post but I feel there's a lot to contextualize.

Thank you lovelies!

don't know why but i find it always funny when a Scorp is frustrated by our behavior lol

i'm with a Scorp right now and most of my exes are Scorps. they confused a lot when it comes to me 🙂

goodluck with this guy whatever you want him to be 🙂

Thank you both!

@Happy_Aqua I don't think I expect too much of him (a "did you get home safe" text would suffice) and, even if I did, all the things that he says 1. While drunk, 2. Behind my back to our friends. is what really throws me off. He seems sincere when saying them, why hide away afterwards?

@Aquanib Gosh, I don't know if what you describe is what's really going on but damn, that sounds so much like him! Being an Aqua, what do you think I should do from here? Just leave him be? I believe where going to be together at yet again another friends b-day dinner in a few weeks.

Still nothing from him by the way!

Hey love! I agree a billion % with @Aquanib

(btw I've also been lurking and this is my first post too. Your situation is similar so i figured id help since I'm stuck myself)

So Let me help your mind a bit and add on to the understanding of our nature as well

since I'm in a somewhat similar situation with a scorpio i just met this weekend lol

Il give you my situation so you can kind of get how my mind (or most aquarius) works through these mental & emotions process and since mine is a bit fresh it should help. And if it doesn't forgive me and my long story on your thread ;P

Ok so here it goes...

I met this girl after a music performance this saturday through a girl that my music partner/best friend is dating.

I found her attractive of course but i didn't put too much into it since emotions and me (like most aquas) don't really get along too well in the area of love.

At one point before things got hot she got my number. We realized we were getting along but the only problem at the moment was that my phone had died. So she pulled hers to save the day and i added my number in it. (hold this in the back of your mind for a minute)

Anyways i was doing a good job to hide my attraction until we all started drinking a bit.

But even then I was keeping my distance.

Mainly because in my past when I've compromised my emotions I've been taken advantage of so I didn't want to expose myself, fall hard and then get played.

And tbh I've realized that I go through this process with every girl I've met and had a mutual attraction with whether i met at a school, club, or at work. So even though i was pushing my emotions away it didn't mean i didn't want her or anything to happen in the future.

I just didn't want to give in until i waited long enough to see how much she wanted me... or if she even wanted me.

Because you see thats the problem that we aquas have most of the time when deep feelings arise with someone.

Its hard to capture that moment and fully trust in it due to our thought and how clouded they get when we feel positives.

We're so used to dealing with the negatives of lives (since we like to fix and help things/people) that when we feel something good it ironically scares the living shit out of us and we claim it to be bad, but only for a short period until we feel another wave of good.

So back to the moment.

Id say about two hours after meeting and dancing together with our friends drinking we locked eyes for like the 5th time on the dance floor and thats when the wave hit me.

The moment went slow mo for me and it was then that i felt the spark in my mind saying "alright dude she's obviously in the same frequency as you and likes, you might as well give in and stop being an asshole"

And so at that moment I just let go of fear and rejection and went in to give her a kiss.

The affection was reciprocated all night to the point where she asked to come home (although we also didn't have sex which i give her kudos since i find it classy when girls hold off the first time 😉)

On the drive to my house we did chat a bit about each other which i enjoyed and then headed home to cuddle and sleep.

So everything at this point in my mind and heart is going great.

I did drink quite a bit so i felt hungover and just wanted to rest.

She cuddled with me till the late morning though and then proceeded to leave due to things she had to do that day.

We stayed in bed for a bit longer until she got on top of me, gave me a kiss and proceeded out the door.

(Back to the mind)

After waking up that day, eating and finally feeling better I started to analyze the previous night and what had happened. I felt great but then the negative thoughts came back...

What did last night mean?

Does she really like me?

Was it just a one time thing?

Am i suppose to pursue or wait?

My mind became a hell hole for a minute until i re-centered myself and then realized what i needed to do for me first to get back on the positive track.

I ended up making a pact with myself that id wait three days before trying to contact her and if and when i did I would only add her on instagram because it was less information about me (we like staying mysterious ;P) and its better imo since it had pictures of what interest us both.

Anyways I waited 3 days then went on adding her. And after waiting a few hours shitting bricks she added me back and my relief got better.

At this point in my mind I was like ok. I made my first move since saturday to go out of my way to find her and add her. I knew she had my number though i figured she was waiting for me.

I decided to do something as small as adding her on insta and as you realize its a big deal for me.

Not because its social media but because we aquas hate clingy but most of all WE HATE BEING CLINGY OURSELVES lol

But now I'm here a day after adding her and I'm waiting for her move... if it ever happens that is lol

And thats my long story about my situation and how my mind was working throughout my evolving feelings towards this female of which I JUST MET -_- lol

Heres the thing my scorpio friend. We aquas fall, and we fall hard. And being aware of that is what causes us to overthink and overanalyze, so in order to be able to have a future with one of us you need to know that sometimes we tend to do that and it can be a lot of work. but don't ever think that it is because we are playing games. Its because we are trying to understand the nature of emotions just as you guys are having to understand the nature of thoughts.

Im sorry I wrote a lot and about myself but i really hope this can help you understand how we work from my perspective when stating to feel deep for someone.

My advice is to be persistent at first. Continue to show devotion. And if he decides to go off grid for a bit, let him. He's just trying to make sure he can center his thoughts and emotions.

AND HERES THE KEY!!!!

At the time of him going off grid DO NOT CONTACT HIM until he contacts you.

This is the hardest part i know but that IS when he will consider you clingy.

Think of his times off grid as is time for himself to recharge and come love you more. 🙂

Much love and feel free to give me advice on what i should and should not do with my situation.

Low key not sure what to do lol

I ain't got time to read all of that but drop him he ain't worth it

@ra3ch80 no problem I'm glad my experiences can help understand us better 🙂

Thank you I'll try my best.

I've been with a Scorpio woman before. My high school sweatheaet actually but I think we were too immature at the time.

So if the opportunity of letting my self fall in love again shows up I think I'm willing to let it happen and not resist the intensity.

Posted by ScorpBA
Hi guys! First time poster, long time lurker.

I have know this Aquarius for about a year and he's driving me absolutely insane. I should mention, before I tell you my shenanigans, that I am a Scorpio female and yes, I do know that him and I are one of the worst combinations possible. Still, I need your help and expertise in order to stay the least bit sane!

We both started to work together at this company around the same time. We quickly became part of the same group of friends and hung out a lot, at and off work. I didn't think much of him at the time, plus I had a boyfriend. Then, something clicked and I saw him a whole lot differently. I had butterflies everytime he walked into the office. Insane!

One time, a week after breaking up with my then boyfriend (for other reasons), me, Aquarius and a bunch of our friends go out to a club. Now, he knows at this point that I am single, so he buys me drinks, is super affectionate, and even tries to kiss me. We end up not doing it but we hold hands as we go home.

Next day at work, Aquarius starts to act off by avoiding me at all costs. I try to be my usual self, although dying inside. Same week, we go out again and he FREAKS OUT.

During the night I try to be extra friendly to brush off any awkwardness (he's still my friend, after all) and he explodes in the middle of the club. Says I should not be coming on too him so strong (I wasn't), says we can not even kiss since we work together, even tough he really likes me. At the end of the night, still begs me to come home with him.

The next week I find out through a mutual friend that he has been talking to her saying that he is freaked out. Saying that he likes me a lot but is scared to have a relationship with me, since we work together and such. My friend says he looks desesperate. Also, she told me she advised him to talk to me and talk things out, which I eagerly expected to happened.

But it doesn't. Of course.

So I talk to him. I don't tell him that I know what he has been saying to my friend but I do let him what I believe his going on. He denies everything, says I should stop coming on to him and offends me to no end. This time I explode and say that he shouldn't talk to me ever again.

Flash forward a couple of months and I decide to put all this behind and act like a normal person towards him. He is friendly enough and I leave the company, not hearing about him for a while.

Then, we meet again at a mutual friends party and the initial awkwardness there might have been disappears after a drink or two. We go out after and BAM - full on make out session. Months and months of sexual tension released. This time he does not freak out but does spill his feelings, saying that he misses me at work, saying that he's not going to be just another hookup, trying to hold my hand as we leave and hug me.

Point: I was wasted by the end of the night and seriously trying to keep it together. Although he was saying really sweet things, I responded a bit agressively and let go of him when he tried to hold hands. Shame on me, I know.

I come home however, expecting this time at least a nice little text. A day goes by, nothing. Two days go by, nothing. On the third day, I text him asking where did all his Friday chattiness had gone. He only replies good morning. Nothing else. I freak out and say, "look there has been a lack of communication and it's staying that way". No response.

This is where am at right now. I cannot with this guy! I know that Aquarius can be tough but damn! I'm not expecting a relationship but I am expecting minimum interest. Every hookup of mine has at least texted me once afterwards. He is my friend and he cannot do that? What is going on? I am so beyond tired figuring him out. I need your help! What should I do?

Sorry for the long post but I feel there's a lot to contextualize.

Thank you lovelies!

I have a Scorpio moon and mars & I love my Aquarius' fear of committing to someone that may not give him the reassurance he needs to open up. We actually share that in common, but I've found that there's a balancing act where he plays his part and I play mine. I enjoy watching him think he's bullshitting me, honestly bc it's just a vulnerability that I kill with a smile or kiss or saying he's so sweet. He's amusing and I take him seriously. My sun is aries & as I found out a few years ago (ordered my official birth certificate) my rising is libra & we do have synastry in our chart with the moon & mars. I'm not an expert on Aquarius men but I've found that if you know yourself enough & try getting to know them as a friend they become less complicated & sites like DXP do help me pay better attention to what they're not saying.

He might dump me soon, because he's kinda catching feelings (I act like I don't notice), but he's said he loves me & my feelings haven't scared him off. Fingers crossed. We know these guys will ghost ya lol.

It's been 8yrs since I participated on DXP, but I'm actually back just to have a place to chat it up about aquas. Sorry to dive right in lol.

Posted by ra3ch80
@DivineTrinity. Thank you for your post! I'm not the OP but I enjoyed reading your post and gaining insight! Good luck with your scorp!

Here's my two cents. They're a little intense, but they do like consistency!

I agree! Great post :-)

Posted by DivineTrinity
Hey love! I agree a billion % with @Aquanib

(btw I've also been lurking and this is my first post too. Your situation is similar so i figured id help since I'm stuck myself)

So Let me help your mind a bit and add on to the understanding of our nature as well

since I'm in a somewhat similar situation with a scorpio i just met this weekend lol

Il give you my situation so you can kind of get how my mind (or most aquarius) works through these mental & emotions process and since mine is a bit fresh it should help. And if it doesn't forgive me and my long story on your thread ;P

Ok so here it goes...

I met this girl after a music performance this saturday through a girl that my music partner/best friend is dating.

I found her attractive of course but i didn't put too much into it since emotions and me (like most aquas) don't really get along too well in the area of love.

At one point before things got hot she got my number. We realized we were getting along but the only problem at the moment was that my phone had died. So she pulled hers to save the day and i added my number in it. (hold this in the back of your mind for a minute)

Anyways i was doing a good job to hide my attraction until we all started drinking a bit.

But even then I was keeping my distance.

Mainly because in my past when I've compromised my emotions I've been taken advantage of so I didn't want to expose myself, fall hard and then get played.

And tbh I've realized that I go through this process with every girl I've met and had a mutual attraction with whether i met at a school, club, or at work. So even though i was pushing my emotions away it didn't mean i didn't want her or anything to happen in the future.

I just didn't want to give in until i waited long enough to see how much she wanted me... or if she even wanted me.

Because you see thats the problem that we aquas have most of the time when deep feelings arise with someone.

Its hard to capture that moment and fully trust in it due to our thought and how clouded they get when we feel positives.

We're so used to dealing with the negatives of lives (since we like to fix and help things/people) that when we feel something good it ironically scares the living shit out of us and we claim it to be bad, but only for a short period until we feel another wave of good.

So back to the moment.

Id say about two hours after meeting and dancing together with our friends drinking we locked eyes for like the 5th time on the dance floor and thats when the wave hit me.

The moment went slow mo for me and it was then that i felt the spark in my mind saying "alright dude she's obviously in the same frequency as you and likes, you might as well give in and stop being an asshole"

And so at that moment I just let go of fear and rejection and went in to give her a kiss.

The affection was reciprocated all night to the point where she asked to come home (although we also didn't have sex which i give her kudos since i find it classy when girls hold off the first time 😉)

On the drive to my house we did chat a bit about each other which i enjoyed and then headed home to cuddle and sleep.

So everything at this point in my mind and heart is going great.

I did drink quite a bit so i felt hungover and just wanted to rest.

She cuddled with me till the late morning though and then proceeded to leave due to things she had to do that day.

We stayed in bed for a bit longer until she got on top of me, gave me a kiss and proceeded out the door.

(Back to the mind)

After waking up that day, eating and finally feeling better I started to analyze the previous night and what had happened. I felt great but then the negative thoughts came back...

What did last night mean?

Does she really like me?

Was it just a one time thing?

Am i suppose to pursue or wait?

My mind became a hell hole for a minute until i re-centered myself and then realized what i needed to do for me first to get back on the positive track.

I ended up making a pact with myself that id wait three days before trying to contact her and if and when i did I would only add her on instagram because it was less information about me (we like staying mysterious ;P) and its better imo since it had pictures of what interest us both.

Anyways I waited 3 days then went on adding her. And after waiting a few hours shitting bricks she added me back and my relief got better.

At this point in my mind I was like ok. I made my first move since saturday to go out of my way to find her and add her. I knew she had my number though i figured she was waiting for me.

I decided to do something as small as adding her on insta and as you realize its a big deal for me.

Not because its social media but because we aquas hate clingy but most of all WE HATE BEING CLINGY OURSELVES lol

But now I'm here a day after adding her and I'm waiting for her move... if it ever happens that is lol

And thats my long story about my situation and how my mind was working throughout my evolving feelings towards this female of which I JUST MET -_- lol

Heres the thing my scorpio friend. We aquas fall, and we fall hard. And being aware of that is what causes us to overthink and overanalyze, so in order to be able to have a future with one of us you need to know that sometimes we tend to do that and it can be a lot of work. but don't ever think that it is because we are playing games. Its because we are trying to understand the nature of emotions just as you guys are having to understand the nature of thoughts.

Im sorry I wrote a lot and about myself but i really hope this can help you understand how we work from my perspective when stating to feel deep for someone.

My advice is to be persistent at first. Continue to show devotion. And if he decides to go off grid for a bit, let him. He's just trying to make sure he can center his thoughts and emotions.

AND HERES THE KEY!!!!

At the time of him going off grid DO NOT CONTACT HIM until he contacts you.

This is the hardest part i know but that IS when he will consider you clingy.

Think of his times off grid as is time for himself to recharge and come love you more. 🙂

Much love and feel free to give me advice on what i should and should not do with my situation.

Low key not sure what to do lol

Omg

You are

Amazing

..'you helped me clarify this aquas man thought and mind.. he just left this morning and we had a pretty romantic time, drinking wine, dancing you romantic cuddles ... he left this morning n I have not heard from its... it's been a day lol.. normally I would text but this time my Aqua moon kicks in and I know what is happening as I'm super detached myself.. hence why I'm here on dxpnet analysing emotion and feelings lol. It's terrible.. what are your placements?

Posted by DivineTrinity
Hey love! I agree a billion % with @Aquanib

(btw I've also been lurking and this is my first post too. Your situation is similar so i figured id help since I'm stuck myself)

So Let me help your mind a bit and add on to the understanding of our nature as well

since I'm in a somewhat similar situation with a scorpio i just met this weekend lol

Il give you my situation so you can kind of get how my mind (or most aquarius) works through these mental & emotions process and since mine is a bit fresh it should help. And if it doesn't forgive me and my long story on your thread ;P

Ok so here it goes...

I met this girl after a music performance this saturday through a girl that my music partner/best friend is dating.

I found her attractive of course but i didn't put too much into it since emotions and me (like most aquas) don't really get along too well in the area of love.

At one point before things got hot she got my number. We realized we were getting along but the only problem at the moment was that my phone had died. So she pulled hers to save the day and i added my number in it. (hold this in the back of your mind for a minute)

Anyways i was doing a good job to hide my attraction until we all started drinking a bit.

But even then I was keeping my distance.

Mainly because in my past when I've compromised my emotions I've been taken advantage of so I didn't want to expose myself, fall hard and then get played.

And tbh I've realized that I go through this process with every girl I've met and had a mutual attraction with whether i met at a school, club, or at work. So even though i was pushing my emotions away it didn't mean i didn't want her or anything to happen in the future.

I just didn't want to give in until i waited long enough to see how much she wanted me... or if she even wanted me.

Because you see thats the problem that we aquas have most of the time when deep feelings arise with someone.

Its hard to capture that moment and fully trust in it due to our thought and how clouded they get when we feel positives.

We're so used to dealing with the negatives of lives (since we like to fix and help things/people) that when we feel something good it ironically scares the living shit out of us and we claim it to be bad, but only for a short period until we feel another wave of good.

So back to the moment.

Id say about two hours after meeting and dancing together with our friends drinking we locked eyes for like the 5th time on the dance floor and thats when the wave hit me.

The moment went slow mo for me and it was then that i felt the spark in my mind saying "alright dude she's obviously in the same frequency as you and likes, you might as well give in and stop being an asshole"

And so at that moment I just let go of fear and rejection and went in to give her a kiss.

The affection was reciprocated all night to the point where she asked to come home (although we also didn't have sex which i give her kudos since i find it classy when girls hold off the first time 😉)

On the drive to my house we did chat a bit about each other which i enjoyed and then headed home to cuddle and sleep.

So everything at this point in my mind and heart is going great.

I did drink quite a bit so i felt hungover and just wanted to rest.

She cuddled with me till the late morning though and then proceeded to leave due to things she had to do that day.

We stayed in bed for a bit longer until she got on top of me, gave me a kiss and proceeded out the door.

(Back to the mind)

After waking up that day, eating and finally feeling better I started to analyze the previous night and what had happened. I felt great but then the negative thoughts came back...

What did last night mean?

Does she really like me?

Was it just a one time thing?

Am i suppose to pursue or wait?

My mind became a hell hole for a minute until i re-centered myself and then realized what i needed to do for me first to get back on the positive track.

I ended up making a pact with myself that id wait three days before trying to contact her and if and when i did I would only add her on instagram because it was less information about me (we like staying mysterious ;P) and its better imo since it had pictures of what interest us both.

Anyways I waited 3 days then went on adding her. And after waiting a few hours shitting bricks she added me back and my relief got better.

At this point in my mind I was like ok. I made my first move since saturday to go out of my way to find her and add her. I knew she had my number though i figured she was waiting for me.

I decided to do something as small as adding her on insta and as you realize its a big deal for me.

Not because its social media but because we aquas hate clingy but most of all WE HATE BEING CLINGY OURSELVES lol

But now I'm here a day after adding her and I'm waiting for her move... if it ever happens that is lol

And thats my long story about my situation and how my mind was working throughout my evolving feelings towards this female of which I JUST MET -_- lol

Heres the thing my scorpio friend. We aquas fall, and we fall hard. And being aware of that is what causes us to overthink and overanalyze, so in order to be able to have a future with one of us you need to know that sometimes we tend to do that and it can be a lot of work. but don't ever think that it is because we are playing games. Its because we are trying to understand the nature of emotions just as you guys are having to understand the nature of thoughts.

Im sorry I wrote a lot and about myself but i really hope this can help you understand how we work from my perspective when stating to feel deep for someone.

My advice is to be persistent at first. Continue to show devotion. And if he decides to go off grid for a bit, let him. He's just trying to make sure he can center his thoughts and emotions.

AND HERES THE KEY!!!!

At the time of him going off grid DO NOT CONTACT HIM until he contacts you.

This is the hardest part i know but that IS when he will consider you clingy.

Think of his times off grid as is time for himself to recharge and come love you more. 🙂

Much love and feel free to give me advice on what i should and should not do with my situation.

Low key not sure what to do lol

At the risk of being repetitive, wow! I cannot thank you enough for your insights. Honestly, I would never interpret the situation like that (because it's a polar opposite from my way of thinking lol) but it makes so much sense. Again: thank you!

Before I return the favor and giving you some advice, major update! My Aquarius has contacted me by sending me a cute selfie of him and a mutual friend, saying "just to let you know everything is alright and to say hello". Huge progress, for him at least lol Said friend has also let me know Aquarius came to him freaking out about me and that he told him to relax. I'm not sure on the details for now but I responded very friendly to Aqua. Do not know what I'm supposed to do now other than that.

Back to your situation! You do not mention you girl's sign so this exclusively my opinion as a female. For me, adding me on Instagram would not suffice to get me to send that first text (a question of pride, not whether I like the person or not). Considering that she knows that you do not have her number, she might have messaged you if you hadn't taken the 3 days to add her. Maybe, she believes you are not that interested (I know I would lol). What I suggest, since you do not have her number, is to reinforce positive engagement through instagram: leave her a comment when she posts a picture or send her a private message when she posts a Insta story. Just to have some context! Then she'll be more motivated to finally contact you.

Honestly, I do believe you have a shot with her! Truth is girls are not like guys; we are way less prone at faking interest for the sake of something and she seemed to show genuine interest by just staying at your house to sleep and even staying in until late morning. God knows I'd never do that with a "one-time guy".

Hope I helped! I'm here if you need me :-)

@rockTenn Thank You it was my first ?

Posted by rockTenn

Posted by ScorpBA
Hi guys! First time poster, long time lurker.

I have know this Aquarius for about a year and he's driving me absolutely insane. I should mention, before I tell you my shenanigans, that I am a Scorpio female and yes, I do know that him and I are one of the worst combinations possible. Still, I need your help and expertise in order to stay the least bit sane!

We both started to work together at this company around the same time. We quickly became part of the same group of friends and hung out a lot, at and off work. I didn't think much of him at the time, plus I had a boyfriend. Then, something clicked and I saw him a whole lot differently. I had butterflies everytime he walked into the office. Insane!

One time, a week after breaking up with my then boyfriend (for other reasons), me, Aquarius and a bunch of our friends go out to a club. Now, he knows at this point that I am single, so he buys me drinks, is super affectionate, and even tries to kiss me. We end up not doing it but we hold hands as we go home.

Next day at work, Aquarius starts to act off by avoiding me at all costs. I try to be my usual self, although dying inside. Same week, we go out again and he FREAKS OUT.

During the night I try to be extra friendly to brush off any awkwardness (he's still my friend, after all) and he explodes in the middle of the club. Says I should not be coming on too him so strong (I wasn't), says we can not even kiss since we work together, even tough he really likes me. At the end of the night, still begs me to come home with him.

The next week I find out through a mutual friend that he has been talking to her saying that he is freaked out. Saying that he likes me a lot but is scared to have a relationship with me, since we work together and such. My friend says he looks desesperate. Also, she told me she advised him to talk to me and talk things out, which I eagerly expected to happened.

But it doesn't. Of course.

So I talk to him. I don't tell him that I know what he has been saying to my friend but I do let him what I believe his going on. He denies everything, says I should stop coming on to him and offends me to no end. This time I explode and say that he shouldn't talk to me ever again.

Flash forward a couple of months and I decide to put all this behind and act like a normal person towards him. He is friendly enough and I leave the company, not hearing about him for a while.

Then, we meet again at a mutual friends party and the initial awkwardness there might have been disappears after a drink or two. We go out after and BAM - full on make out session. Months and months of sexual tension released. This time he does not freak out but does spill his feelings, saying that he misses me at work, saying that he's not going to be just another hookup, trying to hold my hand as we leave and hug me.

Point: I was wasted by the end of the night and seriously trying to keep it together. Although he was saying really sweet things, I responded a bit agressively and let go of him when he tried to hold hands. Shame on me, I know.

I come home however, expecting this time at least a nice little text. A day goes by, nothing. Two days go by, nothing. On the third day, I text him asking where did all his Friday chattiness had gone. He only replies good morning. Nothing else. I freak out and say, "look there has been a lack of communication and it's staying that way". No response.

This is where am at right now. I cannot with this guy! I know that Aquarius can be tough but damn! I'm not expecting a relationship but I am expecting minimum interest. Every hookup of mine has at least texted me once afterwards. He is my friend and he cannot do that? What is going on? I am so beyond tired figuring him out. I need your help! What should I do?

Sorry for the long post but I feel there's a lot to contextualize.

Thank you lovelies!

I have a Scorpio moon and mars & I love my Aquarius' fear of committing to someone that may not give him the reassurance he needs to open up. We actually share that in common, but I've found that there's a balancing act where he plays his part and I play mine. I enjoy watching him think he's bullshitting me, honestly bc it's just a vulnerability that I kill with a smile or kiss or saying he's so sweet. He's amusing and I take him seriously. My sun is aries & as I found out a few years ago (ordered my official birth certificate) my rising is libra & we do have synastry in our chart with the moon & mars. I'm not an expert on Aquarius men but I've found that if you know yourself enough & try getting to know them as a friend they become less complicated & sites like DXP do help me pay better attention to what they're not saying.

He might dump me soon, because he's kinda catching feelings (I act like I don't notice), but he's said he loves me & my feelings haven't scared him off. Fingers crossed. We know these guys will ghost ya lol.

It's been 8yrs since I participated on DXP, but I'm actually back just to have a place to chat it up about aquas. Sorry to dive right in lol.

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I couldn't of said it better! "I'm not an expert on Aquarius men but I've found that if you know yourself enough & try getting to know them as a friend they become less complicated & sites like DXP do help me pay better attention to what they're not saying."

Well I'm glad your back because I'm new and need help once in a while lol I tried posting before and didn't get any so i stayed observing until i found people i felt i could help first and connect with 🙂

As far as ghosting you, the trick is to stay strong and let him be until he comes back to you... he will trust me haha we tend to be idiotic sometimes and overthink. I hate it but truly i love it because its what keeps us being human by having a fault like that 🙂

Posted by aquanib
ayyyy, aquas and work romance. When will we learn to not shit where you eat!? 😄

A quick guide:

He didn't call because he thought by doing so he would give you "the power", especially after all these months of not seeing each other and then spilling his guts to you.

Stuff like that is borderline embarrassing for us aquas, even though we can't live without it end of the day.

He probably thought you'd think of him as overbearing if he'd call straight away after that night (2 cents here, idk what actually goes on in his head), idk, probably wanted to wait longer with messaging you so he can invite you out again (on a day closer to Friday)......

When you wrote back what you wrote.....he got scared and probably filled with doubts and all he could muster was "good morning".

My 2 cents also say that the above poster's first sentence is incorrect. You're not too clingy and in any case....if he was hitting on you a mere week after you ended with your bf, that gives you a bit of leeway on the clingy front, ie. you can be more clingy than the next woman and get away with it.

Still laughing my ass off to the beginning of your message haha

Never shit where you eat damnit lol

Posted by saweetz1988

Posted by DivineTrinity
Hey love! I agree a billion % with @Aquanib

(btw I've also been lurking and this is my first post too. Your situation is similar so i figured id help since I'm stuck myself)

So Let me help your mind a bit and add on to the understanding of our nature as well

since I'm in a somewhat similar situation with a scorpio i just met this weekend lol

Il give you my situation so you can kind of get how my mind (or most aquarius) works through these mental & emotions process and since mine is a bit fresh it should help. And if it doesn't forgive me and my long story on your thread ;P

Ok so here it goes...

I met this girl after a music performance this saturday through a girl that my music partner/best friend is dating.

I found her attractive of course but i didn't put too much into it since emotions and me (like most aquas) don't really get along too well in the area of love.

At one point before things got hot she got my number. We realized we were getting along but the only problem at the moment was that my phone had died. So she pulled hers to save the day and i added my number in it. (hold this in the back of your mind for a minute)

Anyways i was doing a good job to hide my attraction until we all started drinking a bit.

But even then I was keeping my distance.

Mainly because in my past when I've compromised my emotions I've been taken advantage of so I didn't want to expose myself, fall hard and then get played.

And tbh I've realized that I go through this process with every girl I've met and had a mutual attraction with whether i met at a school, club, or at work. So even though i was pushing my emotions away it didn't mean i didn't want her or anything to happen in the future.

I just didn't want to give in until i waited long enough to see how much she wanted me... or if she even wanted me.

Because you see thats the problem that we aquas have most of the time when deep feelings arise with someone.

Its hard to capture that moment and fully trust in it due to our thought and how clouded they get when we feel positives.

We're so used to dealing with the negatives of lives (since we like to fix and help things/people) that when we feel something good it ironically scares the living shit out of us and we claim it to be bad, but only for a short period until we feel another wave of good.

So back to the moment.

Id say about two hours after meeting and dancing together with our friends drinking we locked eyes for like the 5th time on the dance floor and thats when the wave hit me.

The moment went slow mo for me and it was then that i felt the spark in my mind saying "alright dude she's obviously in the same frequency as you and likes, you might as well give in and stop being an asshole"

And so at that moment I just let go of fear and rejection and went in to give her a kiss.

The affection was reciprocated all night to the point where she asked to come home (although we also didn't have sex which i give her kudos since i find it classy when girls hold off the first time 😉)

On the drive to my house we did chat a bit about each other which i enjoyed and then headed home to cuddle and sleep.

So everything at this point in my mind and heart is going great.

I did drink quite a bit so i felt hungover and just wanted to rest.

She cuddled with me till the late morning though and then proceeded to leave due to things she had to do that day.

We stayed in bed for a bit longer until she got on top of me, gave me a kiss and proceeded out the door.

(Back to the mind)

After waking up that day, eating and finally feeling better I started to analyze the previous night and what had happened. I felt great but then the negative thoughts came back...

What did last night mean?

Does she really like me?

Was it just a one time thing?

Am i suppose to pursue or wait?

My mind became a hell hole for a minute until i re-centered myself and then realized what i needed to do for me first to get back on the positive track.

I ended up making a pact with myself that id wait three days before trying to contact her and if and when i did I would only add her on instagram because it was less information about me (we like staying mysterious ;P) and its better imo since it had pictures of what interest us both.

Anyways I waited 3 days then went on adding her. And after waiting a few hours shitting bricks she added me back and my relief got better.

At this point in my mind I was like ok. I made my first move since saturday to go out of my way to find her and add her. I knew she had my number though i figured she was waiting for me.

I decided to do something as small as adding her on insta and as you realize its a big deal for me.

Not because its social media but because we aquas hate clingy but most of all WE HATE BEING CLINGY OURSELVES lol

But now I'm here a day after adding her and I'm waiting for her move... if it ever happens that is lol

And thats my long story about my situation and how my mind was working throughout my evolving feelings towards this female of which I JUST MET -_- lol

Heres the thing my scorpio friend. We aquas fall, and we fall hard. And being aware of that is what causes us to overthink and overanalyze, so in order to be able to have a future with one of us you need to know that sometimes we tend to do that and it can be a lot of work. but don't ever think that it is because we are playing games. Its because we are trying to understand the nature of emotions just as you guys are having to understand the nature of thoughts.

Im sorry I wrote a lot and about myself but i really hope this can help you understand how we work from my perspective when stating to feel deep for someone.

My advice is to be persistent at first. Continue to show devotion. And if he decides to go off grid for a bit, let him. He's just trying to make sure he can center his thoughts and emotions.

AND HERES THE KEY!!!!

At the time of him going off grid DO NOT CONTACT HIM until he contacts you.

This is the hardest part i know but that IS when he will consider you clingy.

Think of his times off grid as is time for himself to recharge and come love you more. 🙂

Much love and feel free to give me advice on what i should and should not do with my situation.

Low key not sure what to do lol

Omg

You are

Amazing

..'you helped me clarify this aquas man thought and mind.. he just left this morning and we had a pretty romantic time, drinking wine, dancing you romantic cuddles ... he left this morning n I have not heard from its... it's been a day lol.. normally I would text but this time my Aqua moon kicks in and I know what is happening as I'm super detached myself.. hence why I'm here on dxpnet analysing emotion and feelings lol. It's terrible.. what are your placements?

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Im happy for you guys that sounds like a pretty amazing time together. We are low key suckers for romantic things. We are just shy at first and want to make sure it is worth our effort!

Some of my placement are Sun in Aqua (of course lol), Asc in Gem, Moon in Pisces, Mercury in Aqua and Capricorn in both Mars and Venus.

Personally I'm still learning a lot about astrology but from what i feel, think and perceive in this present moment is that i have a pretty even chart. When its good its freaking good but when its bad....its bad lol

So thank god/universe for website like these and open minded individuals like everyone on this thread. it helps ALOTTTTT lol

@ ScorpBA

First and foremost, I love you and thank you for this. She is a Scorpio my fault for not mentioning it lol

Ok. As far as the polarity, holy shhh we def work in opposite extremes lol but i feel like that's what really is needed in relationships now a days. To an extent of course.

Because imo I know i haven't fully accepted the way the majority of scorps I've met in my life on how their mind works but what i can say, is that I learn a lot from them & their mission is as important as us Aquas no. Considering my oldest best friend is a Scorpio and i know we will always be there for each other no matter how bad things can get, I feel confident in saying that statement.

The fact that he was asking his friend about you tells it all so keep doing what your doing and us Aquas here will help out as much as we can if shit gets tough! We don't go to the point of asking anyone for help (pride thing -_- working on it trust me) unless we are really tripping and not want to lose you. So like i said just be patient and let him come to you a bit more.

As for my story, Thank you, thank you, thank you! i won't stop saying it lol The logic in your message clicks with me and what i need to do!

And to meet you in the middle let me bring you up to date with this seredipious moment i had today.

Before I arrived home and took a look at these messages (specifically yours) I actually decided to message her and comment on a pic of her hula hooping. She had mentioned she loved hooping at the event we were at so i figured commenting on something she had mentioned would get her to realize a bit that i am attentive even though I'm aloof at times lol

She then replies with a simple "Thank you!!!"

I felt it was a bit short but it didn't really get to me in a negative way so i went about my day and headed home.

Literally about 15-20 min. later guess who is driving behind me on the next lane?

This beauty of a woman lol

I didn't realize i had passed her so i slowed down and exchanged a few words of where e were both headed. Couldn't talk too much since we were both driving and by a school so we eventually just said bye and went our own way.

and tbh if I'm truthful during those 15-20 min i was giving myself the "alright move on don't catch feelings" speech due to the short message on her end lol and there goes the universe putting me into a beautiful confusion again haha

She looked so beautiful and her voice was so sweet that my speech was what i ended up rejecting lol

So now I'm here like you just waiting... How reflective this is for me right now!



*Ik how funny and maybe stupid this whole approach is with social media and not having the balls to make the first move too soon but I've been hurt too many times and learned my lesson. So this is my defense mechanism coming into play. So for everyone lurking on this page laughing, trust me i know and I'm loling with you*

Posted by aquanib

Posted by ScorpBA
I'm not sure on the details for now but I responded very friendly to Aqua. Do not know what I'm supposed to do now other than that.

Send a "good morning" text. Tomorrow or whenever it will be morning where you're at. He will probably want to get together.

🙂

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Agree for sure!

Guys, it looks like I've spoke to soon...

Turns out he did freak out to our mutual friend but he was freaking out because I'm apparently being too overbearing (literally sent him one text lol), he doesn't want a relationship (never asked him or even hinted that I wanted one lol) and he is, and I quote, "just too young". For what? I don't know.

Then our friend told him that he was being a jerk, that I was just talking as a friend and that he should respond normally, so things would not get weird between us. Thus, him sending the picture I talked about.

So, this doesn't seem to be an Aqua problem, just your regular jerk problem lol I don't have extra romantic feelings for him but I am annoyed that he's perceiving me and talking about me as something I am not.

@ScorpBA I'm sorry love. Considering Venus is still retro this doesn't surprise me, thats probably why I'm so hesitant to give anything rn too. Although i did hit up my Scorp to tell her she made my day and that i hoped her interview went well so i hope that helps me get something in return that can help me ease my mind.

Currently staying away from my phone though so i can deal with rejection if it comes lol

At least i feel I'm getting better at not giving too much too soon and just taking it one step at a time.

This is def a jerk problem and i now agree with everyone else to leave him if this is the case.

Not worth your time if youre not invested romantically either *shrugs*

At least we can all come together on these threads and be there for each other on shit like this.

Posted by DivineTrinity
At least we can all come together on these threads and be there for each other on shit like this.

You share the same moon as my Aqua 😉 and he also has venus in Pisces so he's very sensitive and super super cuddly( in the detached one) hah! Isn't that weird lol.... by the way, I agree an instragram add is nothing !! What sign is the woman you wanna be with?

I'm the detached one **

Posted by saweetz1988

Posted by DivineTrinity
At least we can all come together on these threads and be there for each other on shit like this.

You share the same moon as my Aqua 😉 and he also has venus in Pisces so he's very sensitive and super super cuddly( in the detached one) hah! Isn't that weird lol.... by the way, I agree an instragram add is nothing !! What sign is the woman you wanna be with?

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Honestly when i found out my moon is in pisces i cringed lol it gave me the vision of how emotional i can be sometimes and for me being an air sign its very uncomfortable lol

I do love it though because I'm very intuitive with emotions regardless and my air balances it if i get too deep lol

And yes thats extra weird lol Im working with a double scorpio...

I guess my issue is fear of rejection because i did get some bad batches of females these past few months when i was actually being open for once lol

Well I'm glad I'm starting to understand somewhat how water signs feel and think at these situations lol

Posted by DivineTrinity

Posted by saweetz1988

Posted by DivineTrinity
At least we can all come together on these threads and be there for each other on shit like this.

You share the same moon as my Aqua 😉 and he also has venus in Pisces so he's very sensitive and super super cuddly( in the detached one) hah! Isn't that weird lol.... by the way, I agree an instragram add is nothing !! What sign is the woman you wanna be with?

Honestly when i found out my moon is in pisces i cringed lol it gave me the vision of how emotional i can be sometimes and for me being an air sign its very uncomfortable lol

I do love it though because I'm very intuitive with emotions regardless and my air balances it if i get too deep lol

And yes thats extra weird lol Im working with a double scorpio...

I guess my issue is fear of rejection because i did get some bad batches of females these past few months when i was actually being open for once lol

Well I'm glad I'm starting to understand somewhat how water signs feel and think at these situations lol

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Yeah I do love the Pisces moon energy. He's the one that helps me understand my own emotion (Aqua moon) believe it or not.. like let's be frank the other day I was (sexing ) him with my head not being entirely there coz it was one month apart n my feelings for him slowly faded and it prob got to the point that I wasn't into him anymore.. the whole time I thought I acted fine lol only to have him questioning me like no tomorrow of what's going on coz he can read me and know me extremely well.. I couldn't get out of that one.. so I was honest n he said he's sorry , next time around, there was romantic music, romantic wine and I guess I felt love from him once again so I was able to make lovento him .. and I was letting go and just letting it be.. I'm sure not enjoying it with Him crushed his ego very badly.. I think what I'm saying here is, by you not expressing your emotion or acting cool and aloof, it would hurt the other girl if she was in the picture.. and interested in you... 😢 ... we sometimes take Aqua aloofness as they r not interested or , they forget about us when they r not with us, and they have other girlfriends that now are paying attention to (which is what I'm feeling right now without 1.5 day of nothing from him) arghhhh lol... anyway, you r dealing with double Scorpio! That's crazy lol.... I love Pisces energy though, he's so affectionate, loving and caring in person. That's when I don't doubt his feelings for me at all.. when apart though it's a whole other ball game... * the next episode continues*

Posted by Happy_Aqua

Posted by ScorpBA
Guys, it looks like I've spoke to soon...

Turns out he did freak out to our mutual friend but he was freaking out because I'm apparently being too overbearing (literally sent him one text lol), he doesn't want a relationship (never asked him or even hinted that I wanted one lol) and he is, and I quote, "just too young". For what? I don't know.

Then our friend told him that he was being a jerk, that I was just talking as a friend and that he should respond normally, so things would not get weird between us. Thus, him sending the picture I talked about.

So, this doesn't seem to be an Aqua problem, just your regular jerk problem lol I don't have extra romantic feelings for him but I am annoyed that he's perceiving me and talking about me as something I am not.

Sorry to hear that, but he seemed not that into you...... And a person can be overbearing in other ways, besides texting all the time..... You your characters may have just clashed. I have dealt with several Scorpio's in my life (friends & family, male & female) and they always try to control you in some way, which usually doesn't really go well with a freesprited Aqua. I think you made this relationship more than it really was.

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I understand that there other ways to be overbearing besides texting but in this case I had not seen him, nor spoke to him in about a month. And afterwards, I only sent him the one text.

I accept that he's not that into me but his arguments remain invalid, IMO.