Sooooo....what do yall think about these quotes?

What if your partner isn't reaching out because they are tired of having to be the one reaching out and are waiting wanting YOU to take initiative with affection? Seems like this would cause some problems.

Any thoughts on this one?

This is a hard 1, especially if both people feel that the other isn't putting their all into it.

Who goes 1st to be the bigger person? Who puts their ego/pride down 1st? Who does away with their fears of rejection/vulnerability 1st?

I think if you take pride, ego & fear out of the equation, BOTH oughta go 1st. It isn't a race. And there have been times in the past that I convinced myself that not going 1st was me "not trying to force it" when really it was just fears of showing vulnerability (AFTER the disconnect has happened) in disguise.

Not wanting to force something if it's not natural sounds noble right??! Right! B/c forcing something isn't the right way to go. BUT neither is holding back or being dishonest with yourself about the REAL reason you're holding back (it's more about you than it is them)

Everybody's all in when both are going full throttle emotionally with each other, but the minute the momentum slows down, suddenly everybody's true emotional maturity is revealed.

That quote was so me before I got married! I was all in until I felt a disconnection! Once I felt it, I'd sit back in the corner waiting for YOU to pull me back in. But that kinda sh***t doesn't fly when you get married & expect the ultimate vulnerability in a relationship. 2 stubborn, emotionally fearful people won't work unless 1 or both of them "goes 1st." It's easier said than done, but it HAS to be done.

And if you're tired of 1 person always making the 1st move, then that's the moment when communication is the most important. You gotta tell your partner how it makes you feel & how it's affecting your confidence, & feelings about the relationship. It'll be an uncomfortable convo b/c the other person may not realize that them going 2nd is really just insecurity in disguise. But still, ya gotta talk it out. Give the other person a chance to let it sink in & fix it.

All the time spent disconnected can really make it much harder to get the connection back. The longer each person goes feeling unloved, the bigger each person's fears will grow, which just leads to more stubbornness & distance. Dead end street. Somebody has to go 1st!

Posted by krysrenee7
This is a hard 1, especially if both people feel that the other isn't putting their all into it.

Who goes 1st to be the bigger person? Who puts their ego/pride down 1st? Who does away with their fears of rejection/vulnerability 1st?

I think if you take pride, ego & fear out of the equation, BOTH oughta go 1st. It isn't a race. And there have been times in the past that I convinced myself that not going 1st was me "not trying to force it" when really it was just fears of showing vulnerability (AFTER the disconnect has happened) in disguise.

Not wanting to force something if it's not natural sounds noble right??! Right! B/c forcing something isn't the right way to go. BUT neither is holding back or being dishonest with yourself about the REAL reason you're holding back (it's more about you than it is them)

Everybody's all in when both are going full throttle emotionally with each other, but the minute the momentum slows down, suddenly everybody's true emotional maturity is revealed.

That quote was so me before I got married! I was all in until I felt a disconnection! Once I felt it, I'd sit back in the corner waiting for YOU to pull me back in. But that kinda sh***t doesn't fly when you get married & expect the ultimate vulnerability in a relationship. 2 stubborn, emotionally fearful people won't work unless 1 or both of them "goes 1st." It's easier said than done, but it HAS to be done.

And if you're tired of 1 person always making the 1st move, then that's the moment when communication is the most important. You gotta tell your partner how it makes you feel & how it's affecting your confidence, & feelings about the relationship. It'll be an uncomfortable convo b/c the other person may not realize that them going 2nd is really just insecurity in disguise. But still, ya gotta talk it out. Give the other person a chance to let it sink in & fix it.

All the time spent disconnected can really make it much harder to get the connection back. The longer each person goes feeling unloved, the bigger each person's fears will grow, which just leads to more stubbornness & distance. Dead end street. Somebody has to go 1st!

That's probably why he's very, very receptive when I reach out to hold hands, snuggle, etc. You know us cardinals, we're going to get the ball rolling! lol!!

Maybe this has something to do with it?

^^^I think we all deal with this. Maybe Aquarius has a harder time then others?

No matter how confident you are still a dilemma.

I have had this one posted in my profile for a long time now ironically.

I had just posted the same one! lol!

This one probably plays a role too?

I think you could think of it like how you said your gemini was sensitive (maybe not quite that bad but similar) or perhaps a scorpio I dunno.

Anyways Aquarius is usually the one doing all the talking half the damn time... when he/she feels your not interested in what they have to say or appreciated or w/e... They'll either feel you are being rude OR they will rude(the Aquariuses) for bombarding you with excessive information only they are interested in.

Then, they will back off to not subject themselves to an unfriendly environment unless it's for some other reason than just mere pleasure.

To me, what's difficult is knowing how much to reach out without coming across as clingy. I love to snuggle up with my guy or hold hands or come up behind him and give him a hug, or sit in his lap. He's always receptive. Not once have I ever been felt that it was unwelcome, but sometimes I tend to hold back because deciding how much is too much or how much is clingy is not easy.

I think I'm more conscious of it, because in the past with previous relationships, I've usually been the one going "get off me!" lol!

Then again, I dated more emotionally unlimited signs.

😕

Aquas are too prideful to let you know you hurt them 90% of the time. They would rather appear unphased and oblivious to someones actions ... Logically analyze it so they can attempt to circumvent the emotional displays and seem like an invincable ego to break.

Posted by truecap
To me, what's difficult is knowing how much to reach out without coming across as clingy. I love to snuggle up with my guy or hold hands or come up behind him and give him a hug, or sit in his lap. He's always receptive. Not once have I ever been felt that it was unwelcome, but sometimes I tend to hold back because deciding how much is too much or how much is clingy is not easy.

I think I'm more conscious of it, because in the past with previous relationships, I've usually been the one going "get off me!" lol!

Then again, I dated more emotionally unlimited signs.

😕

I'd try not to worry about it.

Sometimes over analyzing things can cause problems.

Posted by NotYourAverageAquarius
I think you could think of it like how you said your gemini was sensitive (maybe not quite that bad but similar) or perhaps a scorpio I dunno.

Anyways Aquarius is usually the one doing all the talking half the damn time... when he/she feels your not interested in what they have to say or appreciated or w/e... They'll either feel you are being rude OR they will rude(the Aquariuses) for bombarding you with excessive information only they are interested in.

Then, they will back off to not subject themselves to an unfriendly environment unless it's for some other reason than just mere pleasure.

It actually makes sense to me.

Posted by NotYourAverageAquarius

Posted by truecap
To me, what's difficult is knowing how much to reach out without coming across as clingy. I love to snuggle up with my guy or hold hands or come up behind him and give him a hug, or sit in his lap. He's always receptive. Not once have I ever been felt that it was unwelcome, but sometimes I tend to hold back because deciding how much is too much or how much is clingy is not easy.

I think I'm more conscious of it, because in the past with previous relationships, I've usually been the one going "get off me!" lol!

Then again, I dated more emotionally unlimited signs.

😕

I'd try not to worry about it.

Sometimes over analyzing things can cause problems.

click to expand

Lol!!! He told me not to overanalyze one time. So yeah.

Anyways, these quotes could take in in several different angles. Yall take off with them. I'd like to see the aquarius point of view on them.

Hey IS,

All I got to say is...
Has not history proven that we should never say never? That the impossible cam also be quite possible?

To think otherwise is narrow minded just based off of history. And whats the point of keeping a recorded history if we don't learn to think differently about our future from the mistakes of those in the past.

IJS
*shrug*
Maybe the last unicorn is out there haha! Or maybe it just went extinct like the dinosaurs!

😄

Haha ^^^

I sang that song in highschool for a musical we did LOOOL!

And at the time I was unaware of what astrology even was ^.^

How ironic.

TrueCap all I can say for sure is this.

An Aquarius longs for open true un manipulative displays of affection. I don't think there is much you can do to hurt where you stand with one by showing it. The only thing that may happen that you might dislike is this.

When you do that enough an Aquarius is likely to go off in his on world or something for longer thinking he is secure with you. The extra affection is not what caused the momentary detachment... only the amount of time it is possible to stay that way.

But this is what I would like to think as a worst case, and inconsiderate scenario.

I think most Aquarius people until they've found true love in their minds will have accepted the fact that love is not something that should be expected to be reciprocated. It's probably the motto for most despite our cold hearted reputation. I think most Aquarians decide from very young that if they want love... they need to be love. THUS, the love they appear to give to everyone. Its a good and bad attribute :/

It's one of those balancing acts. I agree I'm pretty standoffish with any sort of situation after I assert myself.

When it comes to relationships I try to give my all at the start but that's just how I usually am. The sensitivity comes in later and this is where I need to decide whether they've grown accustomed to me being the initiator but the sentiment rings true in that I do expect the other person to want it as much as I do.

If at anytime I feel they don't I would back off immediately. I know the concern here as well is Aquas love their freedom and their own space, I really think it's per individual because I really don't mind spending my own time with that other person. I like to escape and what better way than to take the person I love with me.

Posted by NotYourAverageAquarius
Aquas are too prideful to let you know you hurt them 90% of the time. They would rather appear unphased and oblivious to someones actions ... Logically analyze it so they can attempt to circumvent the emotional displays and seem like an invincable ego to break.

don't say that for all, because i will tell you straight if someone hurts me. I just don't have any pride when it comes to that! i will cry and fuss. I have no shame, because if my feelings are hurt, i can't help myself and cry.

it might be the men more, because of the way men are "conditioned" to be "manly" and not show feelings.

True doesn't mean ALL I agree 🙂

So, based on all that, what do you think about this very likely scenario (and it could go both ways):

Gotta start somewhere, so we'll start here: Partner expresses feelings/love/affection. Aqua is receptive. Aqua has issue at work. Aqua, in thinking mode, is aloof and distant (because they have something on their mind), yet partner thinks it's because something they said or did (which is most likely not the case). So partner backs off. Aqua notices the partner has changed and created distance, so aqua backs off. Partner thinks they're giving space, so partner doesn't make contact and waits. Aqua notices an even greater change so backs off more. Partner thinks Aqua has disappeared, when aqua is waiting on partner to make contact and aqua refuses to chase. Partner feels insecure about reaching out because they don't know it's wanted since aqua keeps feelings bottle up and isn't comfortable sharing. Aqua wants to feel wanted. Relationship fizzles.

When all that's needed is a little understanding that the aqua aloofness isn't personal, so the partner should proceed as normal with contact and affection. Aqua figures out what they've been analyzing and shortly returns to usual self and relationship continues along a normal, happy path.

If partners understood the distance and if aquas communicated feelings better, that whole scenario could be avoided.

No, I'm not saying that's how it always is, it's just a scenario I used for an example.

Curious though, if any of you think this is how it could play out.

Obviously Lisa will disagree...

All I can say is that that could be how it would play out for me. As much as I regret to admit it. However, I think I'm more likely to reach out... Than some other Aquarius.

Also, it really depends on how long I've dated you or been with for. If we've been together for years... I doubt seriously I'm going to just let that slip through my hands like that. Based off of how I've dealt with that in the past.

Still... the older I get the colder I become when single or dealing with my perception of rejection. And to be honest I really don't like it but I can get so negative its disgusting.

Posted by NotYourAverageAquarius
Obviously Lisa will disagree...

All I can say is that that could be how it would play out for me. As much as I regret to admit it. However, I think I'm more likely to reach out... Than some other Aquarius.

Also, it really depends on how long I've dated you or been with for. If we've been together for years... I doubt seriously I'm going to just let that slip through my hands like that. Based off of how I've dealt with that in the past.

Still... the older I get the colder I become when single or dealing with my perception of rejection. And to be honest I really don't like it but I can get so negative its disgusting.

jesus.... i'm not trying to just disagree...i'm telling you the truth. I've NEVER had to analyze anything too much into a relationship, because it just happens. It's so hard to explain. i don't look into things like that, i dont even like math for goodness sakes. I hate math, so why would i even want to analyze something that i go on feelings for? i'm glad i never learned astrology earlier because all these 'boxed' in descriptions are really too much. usually just go with the flow.

Posted by truecap
So, based on all that, what do you think about this very likely scenario (and it could go both ways):
Gotta start somewhere, so we'll start here: Partner expresses feelings/love/affection. Aqua is receptive. Aqua has issue at work. Aqua, in thinking mode, is aloof and distant (because they have something on their mind), yet partner thinks it's because something they said or did (which is most likely not the case). So partner backs off. Aqua notices the partner has changed and created distance, so aqua backs off. Partner thinks they're giving space, so partner doesn't make contact and waits. Aqua notices an even greater change so backs off more. Partner thinks Aqua has disappeared, when aqua is waiting on partner to make contact and aqua refuses to chase. Partner feels insecure about reaching out because they don't know it's wanted since aqua keeps feelings bottle up and isn't comfortable sharing. Aqua wants to feel wanted. Relationship fizzles.
When all that's needed is a little understanding that the aqua aloofness isn't personal, so the partner should proceed as normal with contact and affection. Aqua figures out what they've been analyzing and shortly returns to usual self and relationship continues along a normal, happy path.
If partners understood the distance and if aquas communicated feelings better, that whole scenario could be avoided.
No, I'm not saying that's how it always is, it's just a scenario I used for an example.
Curious though, if any of you think this is how it could play out.

it's as if you have these laid out plans. if someone is not paying attention, you just tell him, hey!! pay attention, their minds are probably somewhere else, daydreaming or something like that. There's really honestly not anything to analyze about. Just shake them up and snap your fingers to pay attention. what you have described sounds like a chess game. O_O

Posted by lisabethur8

Posted by truecap
So, based on all that, what do you think about this very likely scenario (and it could go both ways):
Gotta start somewhere, so we'll start here: Partner expresses feelings/love/affection. Aqua is receptive. Aqua has issue at work. Aqua, in thinking mode, is aloof and distant (because they have something on their mind), yet partner thinks it's because something they said or did (which is most likely not the case). So partner backs off. Aqua notices the partner has changed and created distance, so aqua backs off. Partner thinks they're giving space, so partner doesn't make contact and waits. Aqua notices an even greater change so backs off more. Partner thinks Aqua has disappeared, when aqua is waiting on partner to make contact and aqua refuses to chase. Partner feels insecure about reaching out because they don't know it's wanted since aqua keeps feelings bottle up and isn't comfortable sharing. Aqua wants to feel wanted. Relationship fizzles.
When all that's needed is a little understanding that the aqua aloofness isn't personal, so the partner should proceed as normal with contact and affection. Aqua figures out what they've been analyzing and shortly returns to usual self and relationship continues along a normal, happy path.
If partners understood the distance and if aquas communicated feelings better, that whole scenario could be avoided.
No, I'm not saying that's how it always is, it's just a scenario I used for an example.
Curious though, if any of you think this is how it could play out.

it's as if you have these laid out plans. if someone is not paying attention, you just tell him, hey!! pay attention, their minds are probably somewhere else, daydreaming or something like that. There's really honestly not anything to analyze about. Just shake them up and snap your fingers to pay attention. what you have described sounds like a chess game. O_O

click to expand

It was just an example of lack of communication and understanding and the effects of that. It offers opposing viewpoints on distance and how it could easily be misinterpreted. So, couples that can communicate like you said, then they have a better chance of making it. That's what I meant, anyway.

oh ok, truecap, thanks for that. 🙂

that is common sense, true.

Well, I used stereotypes based on those quotes and I suppose this scenario could go for any relationship regardless of sign.

I just think the stereotypical aqua distance and/or need for space is misunderstood by us other signs, and I, myself, am guilty of misunderstanding it in the past. We, as the human race, tend to let our insecurities get the best of us to our own detriment.

Posted by lisabethur8

Posted by NotYourAverageAquarius
Obviously Lisa will disagree...

All I can say is that that could be how it would play out for me. As much as I regret to admit it. However, I think I'm more likely to reach out... Than some other Aquarius.

Also, it really depends on how long I've dated you or been with for. If we've been together for years... I doubt seriously I'm going to just let that slip through my hands like that. Based off of how I've dealt with that in the past.

Still... the older I get the colder I become when single or dealing with my perception of rejection. And to be honest I really don't like it but I can get so negative its disgusting.

jesus.... i'm not trying to just disagree...i'm telling you the truth. I've NEVER had to analyze anything too much into a relationship, because it just happens. It's so hard to explain. i don't look into things like that, i dont even like math for goodness sakes. I hate math, so why would i even want to analyze something that i go on feelings for? i'm glad i never learned astrology earlier because all these 'boxed' in descriptions are really too much. usually just go with the flow.

click to expand

That's why I said it. I don't see why you so ancy now? I merely said what you would say. Why get frazzled about it?

Posted by NotYourAverageAquarius

Posted by lisabethur8

Posted by NotYourAverageAquarius
Obviously Lisa will disagree...
All I can say is that that could be how it would play out for me. As much as I regret to admit it. However, I think I'm more likely to reach out... Than some other Aquarius.
Also, it really depends on how long I've dated you or been with for. If we've been together for years... I doubt seriously I'm going to just let that slip through my hands like that. Based off of how I've dealt with that in the past.
Still... the older I get the colder I become when single or dealing with my perception of rejection. And to be honest I really don't like it but I can get so negative its disgusting.

jesus.... i'm not trying to just disagree...i'm telling you the truth. I've NEVER had to analyze anything too much into a relationship, because it just happens. It's so hard to explain. i don't look into things like that, i dont even like math for goodness sakes. I hate math, so why would i even want to analyze something that i go on feelings for? i'm glad i never learned astrology earlier because all these 'boxed' in descriptions are really too much. usually just go with the flow.

That's why I said it. I don't see why you so ancy now? I merely said what you would say. Why get frazzled about it?

click to expand

i'm not, but i have to say that when you write down, well 'obviously' lisa will disagree. i feel like i'm the only one disagreeing...but then again, not really now that i remember...i remember jizz and aquanoz also disagreeing with some stuff on articles and against krysenee too, who is notorious for saying "all" aqua this and that in her own way.

Truecap, when it comes to my aqua, these quotes are so true! And it helps me to put some things into perspective.

Posted by truecap
Well, I used stereotypes based on those quotes and I suppose this scenario could go for any relationship regardless of sign.

I just think the stereotypical aqua distance and/or need for space is misunderstood by us other signs, and I, myself, am guilty of misunderstanding it in the past. We, as the human race, tend to let our insecurities get the best of us to our own detriment.

You're right.

Hey sometimes it's US just being insecure & overly cautious/fearful and other's "analysis" is absolutely right lol

And other times, nothing is actually wrong lol it's just the other person assuming that different=difficult or different= time to overanalyze this person too death lol

We're all somewhat stuck in our ways. Just some more than others. We're all used to certain things. So when we find ourselves interacting with someone who ticks completely different than we do, it's like wtf!! And from there it's usually over-analyzation, confusion & possibly loss of interest. And probably all over something that was actually really simple or easily changeable that we yet considered super complicated.

Honestly, it sucks for people on both ends. As an Aqua, I may not care as much if someone loses interest in me as some other signs might. But if I really like you & can see a future with you AND if you tell me exactly what it is I both am doing and not doing that's confusing you, I'll try my best to rectify the situation. Trust me, I am just as annoyed feeling misunderstood as the person who misunderstands me lolol

I will say this though.

Aquas are still human beings just like everybody else. Your stubbornness or unwillingness to go 1st may be annoying (how dare you not go first! We wanted to be the ones who didn't go first!! lol) BUT if we REALLY REALLY like you, we'll do what we have to if it means keeping you around.

When a person really wants something, they'll make it happen. Aquas follow that rule in life too.

If I'm not that into you & you won't go 1st, I might misunderstand you too & assume that you're either not that interested, are emotionally unavailable or basically something negative that makes me assume I'll always have this "who goes first" issue with you lol And from there, my interest will drop quickly. Some call it a double standard but hey it is what it is.

But again, the keywords are that I have to really really like you. I just "prefer" for the other person to go 1st, not necessarily "require." If it's worth it, I'll go 1st if I have to. Call it insecurity, fear of rejection or whatever but hey it is what it is.

Posted by krysrenee7
I will say this though.

Aquas are still human beings just like everybody else. Your stubbornness or unwillingness to go 1st may be annoying (how dare you not go first! We wanted to be the ones who didn't go first!! lol) BUT if we REALLY REALLY like you, we'll do what we have to if it means keeping you around.

When a person really wants something, they'll make it happen. Aquas follow that rule in life too.

If I'm not that into you & you won't go 1st, I might misunderstand you too & assume that you're either not that interested, are emotionally unavailable or basically something negative that makes me assume I'll always have this "who goes first" issue with you lol And from there, my interest will drop quickly. Some call it a double standard but hey it is what it is.

But again, the keywords are that I have to really really like you. I just "prefer" for the other person to go 1st, not necessarily "require." If it's worth it, I'll go 1st if I have to. Call it insecurity, fear of rejection or whatever but hey it is what it is.

It should be about 50/50 on who initiates affection/attention/romance don't ya think?

If one person is always going first, then that person feels like the other is not as into them. Like someone said, you need to feel like the partner wants it just as bad - goes both ways!
🙂

As an AQUA I GIVE 100 % to the people I love.

I never keep track of who initiated what.

It's a give and take and it goes in phases.

Posted by aquapiscescusp
As an AQUA I GIVE 100 % to the people I love.

I never keep track of who initiated what.

It's a give and take and it goes in phases.

As it should be.

Posted by aquapiscescusp
As an AQUA I GIVE 100 % to the people I love.

I never keep track of who initiated what.

It's a give and take and it goes in phases.

It's usually the same for me.
But I'm just saying that I'm not perfect.

Posted by NotYourAverageAquarius

Posted by aquapiscescusp
As an AQUA I GIVE 100 % to the people I love.

I never keep track of who initiated what.

It's a give and take and it goes in phases.

It's usually the same for me.
But I'm just saying that I'm not perfect.

click to expand

you're not? 😄

men take more than they give-- maybe?

I can't speak for all men.
🙂